ds90ty British TV On DS9

There had been a fight on the station. A horrible fight. It had lasted about 2 hours. There were many injuries and perhaps even some deaths.Dax, O'Brien, Sisko, Odo and Kira were running around the space station like godness-knows-what (Qu'ark wasn't; he had most likely STARTED the fight). Dax and Sisko reached the infrimary. They expected to see Dr Bashir treating patients and rushing around like godness-knows-what as well, but instead there were queues and queues of patients, some near death. In the middle of them all was Dr Bashir, looking to nowhere, with a dazed look on his face.
"Dr. Bashir," asked Commander Sisquo. "What are you doing?"
Dr. Bashir seemed to wake up from his trance. He looked at Sisquo for a while. Finally, he sighed and turned back around saying "Sorry guys, I'm on holiday."
Dax stuttered for something to say when Odo entered. "Thank godness," thought Dax. "He can always think of something to get things back to normal."
"Commander Sisko?" said Odo. Sisquo turned around. Was it bad news? "It is time." Without a word, Odo and Sisko left the infirmary. Dax, finaly giving up on Dr. Bashir, followed them.
Odo, Sisko and Dax reached Qu'ark's bar in what seemed to be recorded breaking time.
"What took you so long?" said a frustrated Qu'arck.
"Enough with the small talk!" bellowed Odo so loudly that it made Qu'ark jump "Turn the thing on!" Qu'ark reached for a controller and switched on the mystery object.
"Eh-oh!" sounded the mysertry object.
"Yay! It's Twinkie-Winkie!" cried out Commander Sisko. He was sushed automatically by both Qu'ark and Odo who were both completely into the programme. Dax looked at her watch and then tutted. She should have known the Teletubbies were on now.
Dax decided to leave the bar quickly before she was forced to sing any of the teletubbie's songs(again...long story). Outside she found Kira and O'Brien.
"What I don't understand," O'Brien said to Kira, with a concerned expression on his face, "Is how she could do this to Jamie."
"Has Jamie been hurt in the fight?" said a now alarmed Dax. She didn't know who the heck Jamie was but whatever had happened to him, it sounded very serious indeed.
"Yes," said an equally concerned Kira. "But not in the fight."
"Oh," replied Dax. "Should I report this incident to Dr. Bashir?"
Upon Dax saying this, both Kira and O'Brien gave her a very confused look. "Dax, Jamie doesn't live on DS9." explained O'Brien. "He lives in Albert Square, on Earth."
That was the last straw for Dax. She couldn't take it much longer. She was trying to act serious and get her job done in a time of crisis and all anybody else wanted to do was discuss British television. "I've had enough of this!" she yelled at Kira and O'Brien. "Am I the only around here doing what I'm supposed to? There's Dr. Bashir of on his beloved Thompson's holiday, there's Odo, Sisko and Qu'ark off on a planet of their own with La La and Po and now you two!" At that she stromed back to her quarters.Why couldn't anybody on this ship have decent taste in television programming she thought as she went to turn on her own television. What was so great about British television anyway, she thought as her television began to say "Jerry! Jerry! Jerry!....."