Title: The Best Christmas Ever, part 6 of 7
Author: Depudor
Email: l_brew@email.msn.com
Disclaimer: These characters belong to Steven Antin and Columbia/Tristar Television. No infringement intended.
Summary: This is the sequel to Winter Wonderland. Jake and Hamilton spend Christmas together and compete to give each other the best present, but find their desires - and intentions - to be at odds with each other.
Thanks: To beta beauties Debi and Sue for their support and encouragement, and to Wonka for letting herself get roped into it.
Feedback: Please.
_____________________________________________________________________________
Dinner was subdued compared to the chaotic preparations. Kate was quieter than Jake had seen her at any point in the last four days. Dean Fleming, however, was still in a jubilant mood.
"This goose is really amazing, Kate," he said. "And I didn't think anything could top last year's."
"Yeah, Mrs. Fleming," Jake concurred. "It's great."
"Thank you," Kate replied.
Jake looked at the Dean and added, "The cranberry sauce is really working for me, too."
The Dean smiled, as if he'd known it all along. It was the same knowing smile that Jake had seen so often on Hamilton's face.
"I certainly can't complain," said Finn. "It's so rare that I get a home-cooked meal."
"I know the feeling," Hamilton sighed.
"Hamilton --" his father warned.
But Kate didn't seem to notice. She was still focused on Finn.
Jake looked up and watched them as she chewed. She could sense some kind of tension. She looked across the table at Hamilton to see if he noticed, but his face was staring hungrily down at his food. She knew the only thing on his mind other than eating was the hope that his father wouldn't bring up his English Lit exam.
"So, Finn," the Dean asked, "how did my son do on his English final?"
Hamilton stopped chewing and tried to swallow as he looked up at Finn. His teacher smiled at him and said nothing for a tortuous few seconds until he turned to the Dean and replied, with an approving nod, "I have to tell you, Steven, I was absolutely astounded by some of the things he wrote."
Hamilton almost choked as he swallowed, and he started coughing loudly. His father reached over and clapped him on the back as he said, "Really? How so?"
"Hamilton has quite an imagination, not to mention -- how shall I say? -- an eye for the unusual." Hamilton and Jake exchanged a look as Finn concluded, "I've really enjoyed having him in my class. And Jake as well."
The rest of the meal passed uneventfully. Jake summoned the courage to try the mincemeat pie, once Hamilton assured her that it didn't taste like meat. But it turned out she wasn't such a huge fan of spiced raisins and dates, either.
"Fortunately," Kate said, "I picked up some Christmas cookies at the bakery." She headed back to the kitchen, stopping to ask, "Would anyone like coffee?"
"I'd love some," Finn said.
Dean Fleming got up from the table. "If you'll excuse me for a moment, I'm going to go start a fire."
"Are we moving this party into the living room?" Finn asked as he was left alone with Jake and Hamilton.
"After dinner, we open presents," Hamilton explained.
"You open presents tonight? What do you do tomorrow?"
"We sleep in, then go to church." He looked at Jake. "You can come if you want, no pressure. Then we come home and eat leftovers, because all the restaurants are closed and my mom has some rule against cooking two days in a row."
"She has a rule?" said Jake.
"Yeah. It's some feminist thing... liberation from oppression, female stereotypes, something like that."
"Your mom's my kind of woman," Jake said. She thought she saw Finn nod in agreement, but she wasn't sure.
Hamilton was too busy finishing his pie to notice. "Hey, Mom," he yelled toward the kitchen. "Can we have the coffee and cookies in the living room so we can get started?"
Kate reappeared in the doorway and smiled knowingly at her son. "I'm impressed that you've been as patient as you have, Munchie. This must be a record for you."
Hamilton smirked at her.
"Fine," she conceded, setting a pitcher of egg nog on the table. "I'll set everything out, and you guys can help yourselves if you get hungry."
Hamilton grinned at Jake as he jumped from his seat and tore out of the room. Jake and Finn followed him into the living room and watched him sit on the floor in front of the tree and the presents. Finn picked up his coat off the back of the couch.
"I should probably get going," he said.
"No, stay," the Dean insisted. "You haven't even had your coffee yet."
"But you guys are opening presents, and--"
"So join in the fun. You can have some of Hamilton's presents."
"Hey!" Hamilton protested. His father laughed.
"I really shouldn't," said Finn.
"Of course you should. The present opening won't take that long, and then the boys will go play and we adults can have some brandy and some grown-up conversation. It's been a while since I've checked up on what's going on in the world. I must be the most clueless man alive right now."
Hamilton had to look at Jake again as he tried not to laugh, but she turned to Finn and put a hand on his arm. His presence that evening had been surprisingly comforting for her.
"Please stay," she begged quietly. "I don't feel as much like the odd man out with you here."
"Well... OK," Finn said.
Kate walked into the living room, stopping at the stereo to put on a CD of Christmas carols. "OK what?"
"Finn's going to stay for the festivities," her husband replied.
She looked at Finn, her glare like ice, then turned back to the stereo. "Oh... OK."
"Can I play Santa?" Hamilton asked, grabbing a large gift with a giant red bow.
"Do I ever let you play Santa?" his father asked in reply.
"No."
"And nothing's changed."
Jake laughed as Hamilton's face fell. The Dean took the box from him and sat down on a chair next to the tree. Kate joined Hamilton on the floor. It was an idyllic scene: the three of them before the pile of presents, the fire crackling in the fireplace, the lights of the tree twinkling and reflecting in the frosty panes of the bay windows, the voices of a choir joyously belting out carols from the stereo. Jake just watched for a moment until Finn motioned for her to join him on the loveseat by the fire.
"Here, I saved you a seat in the non-Fleming section."
Dean Fleming looked at the tag on the big box and sighed. "I guess we'll start with Hamilton."
The part of Hamilton that had turned twelve when his father walked in was still with him. Jake watched him, and it made her smile. He was giddy with anticipation. And as he unwrapped his numerous presents, Jake understood why. Not only were the gifts plentiful, they were expensive -- and exactly what he wanted. The deluxe tripod and other photography equipment were from his mother, who was always willing to support his hobby by keeping track of what he needed. The digital camera was a surprise, an added bonus. The Playstation 2 was an even bigger surprise.
"Oh, my God!!," he cried as he ripped away the paper. "How did you get this? They're, like, impossible to find."
The Dean smiled. "Turns out the design engineer -- a Rawley grad."
"No way."
"Way," his mother replied.
Hamilton looked at Jake, expecting her to be as psyched as he was. But Jake's smile had wilted into a frown, the same frown he had seen on her face when she had fled the kitchen the previous morning. It was the frown she always wore when she was thinking about her mother.
"Jake..." Hamilton began, wanting to ask if she was OK but not wanting to sound too concerned.
She forced a smile, not wanting to ruin his fun. But she leaned over to Finn and whispered, "I need to run upstairs for a sec." Finn stopped her as she tried to get up.
"Are you OK?" he asked.
"I can't watch this," she whispered. "I hate to sound like a stupid jealous kid, but... it's just too hard."
"Well, from one stupid jealous kid to another, come with me to get some eggnog."
Finn got up, and Jake followed him into the dining room, motioning to Hamilton to continue with his unwrapping. The other Flemings barely noticed, focused as they were on Hamilton.
"I know it's hard," Finn said quietly. "Hamilton doesn't realize how good he has it. But that's the thing about holidays. They're the best time of year to spend with your family. But the loneliest time of year if you're not with them."
"Why aren't you with your family?"
Finn picked up the carafe of coffee and poured some into a gold-rimmed china cup. "I ask myself that question a lot... Coffee?"
"Sure," Jake said.
He handed her the cup and poured another, staring thoughtfully at it as he explained, "Our lives diverged, and old wounds never got a chance to heal."
"And how do those wounds heal, exactly?"
Finn picked up the pitcher of egg nog and poured some into his coffee. He didn't notice Jake smile, because he was carefully choosing his next words:
"With patience and forgiveness. With realizing that people fail us, because they're not perfect. With communicating, telling them how we feel instead of just holding it all inside. Jake, have you ever told your mother that you feel like she doesn't know you?"
"Um, well... not in those words, no." She poured some egg nog into her own coffee and stirred it.
Finn lowered his voice even more. "You thought it would be better to run off to school, dress up like a boy, and then keep her from finding out about it?"
"She was supposed to find out. That was the original plan. The pre-Hamilton plan."
"Uh-huh. So you can see where the passive-aggressive route got you."
"I thought you were supposed to be helping, not making me feel worse."
"At Rawley we don't coddle our students; we make them think. I'm suggesting that you work on your relationship with your mother by talking to her. If you get the chance, take it. Don't let anger and resentment get in the way. They'll grow and fester until you've gone too far to go back."
Jake considered this as she sipped her coffee. "Maybe I'd rather just get to the point where I don't care anymore."
"No, you don't stop caring. Love can be replaced by hate, but the emotion is still as strong. And Jake, a dysfunctional family is better than no family at all." He walked back to the doorway, looking into the living room, where Kate was opening a present. "You know, nobody's family is perfect, not even Hamilton's. Things just always look that way on the surface."
Jake looked up at him, then peered through the doorway. The Flemings looked so happy, like such the perfect family. Yeah, Jake thought, Hamilton always complained that his father was too wrapped up in his job, but they all seemed to genuinely love each other and want to be together.
"And how are you handling the stress?" Finn asked.
"The stress?"
"Of your charade. Your double life?"
"I guess I've gotten used to it."
"You're pretty good at it, I must say."
"It's the actress in me."
Across the room, Kate looked over and saw them in the doorway, then turned to her husband. "Steven, why don't you let Jake open some presents?"
"All right." He called out, "Jake, come here. Let's see what Santa brought for you."
Jake nodded a silent 'Thank you' to Finn and went to sit down next to Hamilton under the tree. The Dean handed her the gold-wrapped box that Hamilton had eyed that morning. They watched her as she carefully ripped away the paper and opened the box. It contained a stack of computer games.
Jake grinned. "Mrs. Fleming, thank you so much. You didn't have to do that."
"I didn't do anything. Thank Santa." She smiled at Hamilton, but he was looking at Jake. Kate turned around to see Finn watching all this from the dining room doorway, and she got up and approached him, glowering.
Finn knew he was in for it.
"You said you weren't coming," she snapped as she walked past him to the table, keeping her voice low enough that it wouldn't carry over the Christmas carols.
"No, *you* said I wasn't coming. I made no promises."
"You shouldn't be here."
"I know."
"In my home, with my family --"
"I know."
"This is a holiday. It's a sacred time."
"I know."
"So why are you here?"
Finn sighed. "I don't know." But that wasn't true.
Kate poured herself a cup of coffee and drilled her nails on the side of the cup. She didn't look at him as she said, "Just wanted to ruin my Christmas, huh?"
"I didn't think having me here would ruin it for you."
Now she turned her glare back on him. "What did you think I would--"
"You know, Kate, not everything is about you," he interrupted. "Jake is going through a rough time. Could you imagine being sixteen and getting ditched by your mother -- your only family -- at Christmas?"
"Don't get me started on Jake."
"Is there a problem?"
Kate looked through the doorway as Jake unwrapped another gift. "I don't want to talk about this," she said. "It's Christmas."
Finn looked at his watch. "Not for another three hours, actually."
Kate rolled her eyes but said nothing. Normally, she would have shot right back at him, but now she was distracted, watching her son watch Jake open the presents from his best friend.
"Ah, yes..." Finn said, following her gaze toward the tree, where Jake was examining the unwrapped box.
"A CD burner!" Jake exclaimed.
"Not just any CD burner," Hamilton corrected her. "Look at the stacked drives. You can make multiple copies at the same time."
"Oh, my God. That's so unbelievably cool. Thanks, man."
Hamilton grinned, delighted that Jake was so happy.
"Now I know what you needed all that money for," his father commented. He turned to find and Kate and Finn in the doorway and explained, "When I gave him his allowance last week, he asked if he qualified for a Christmas bonus."
Finn laughed and looked at Kate, who wasn't laughing. She was still watching Hamilton. Finn eyed her for a moment, then whispered, "You know, Kate, believe it or not, there are going to be things in his life that are none of your business."
"You know something about this?"
"I know I wouldn't rush to assume anything. I was a 16-year-old boy once, and I know it can be a confusing time. And Jake is... well... Jake could make any heterosexual boy confused."
Kate mulled this over. "I don't think Jake will be staying over here again."
"That's too bad. 'Cause Jake's a great kid. A really great kid, who happens to be going through a lot right now. It's bad enough getting sent away to school, but then to be denied Christmas with your family... Can you imagine what that would do to a kid?"
She shook her head, but she wasn't thinking about Jake. "I can't believe you know something about this and I don't."
Finn looked at her, and he almost laughed, because he knew that ultimately what she was grappling with wasn't whether or not her son was gay, but rather the fact that he had a life of his own. "Kate you're right," he said finally, still keeping his voice below the music from the stereo. He waited until he had her attention, and then he continued, "This isn't my family, and I have no place here. But as someone who cares about you, and who cares about your son, let me offer you one piece of advice."
"What?"
"Let Hamilton work this out on his own. I know that's almost impossible for you, but don't get involved."
She sighed but said nothing. Across the room, her husband handed another gift to Hamilton.
"Ham, here's another one from me. Sorry, nothing electronic in there."
Hamilton ripped away the ribbon and paper and opened the box. He pulled out three books and a small, flat box all tied together with a ribbon.
"No offense to Finn," the Dean said with a smile, casting a glance toward the doorway, "but I feel that your literary education leans too heavily toward Western civilization. So, I put together something with an Asian theme. Siddhartha, the Bhagavad Gita, and some Basho."
"And a zen rock garden?" Hamilton added, looking at the small box.
"It's all a theme. Just so you know there's more to the Orient than egg rolls and feng shui."
Kate couldn't help but smile at Finn, knowing what he was going to say.
"Siddhartha was written by a German," Finn mumbled.
"I know," Kate whispered. "But I guess we can't get away from the West altogether, can we?" The smile on her face faded slowly as she saw Hamilton set the books aside and move on to something else. She furrowed her brow, and a sadness settled in her eyes. "He loves Hamilton so much. I wish Hamilton could see it. Maybe Steven doesn't express it in the best way, but he's always thinking about him, about what he's learning, how he's developing, how prepared he is to go out into the big world."
Finn stood silently for a moment, then turned and walked back to the table, where he set down his coffee cup. "Kate, I think it's time for me to be on my way."
"You don't have to leave. I'm sorry I was so..."
"Rude?"
"Yes. It's just... this is hard."
"I know." He held her gaze for a moment, then turned and walked back into the living room. He picked up his coat from the back of the couch. "Steven, thanks for having me, but I do need to get going."
"But Finn, we're almost done, and then we'll have a nightcap before you go back out into the cold."
"I shouldn't. I need to get up early tomorrow and drive up to the mountain. But it was a lovely dinner. Jake, Hamilton, enjoy the rest of your Christmas." The Dean started to rise, but Finn stopped him. "Don't get up. If you don't mind, I'll have Jake walk me to the door."
The Dean sat back down and nodded. "OK. Merry Christmas, Finn," he said.
"Merry Christmas to you all," Finn replied. Jake got up and followed him into the hallway and to the front door.
"Thanks for the talk," she said.
"My pleasure." He opened the door. "That wasn't so bad, was it?"
"No, not so bad... Were, um, you and Mrs. Fleming talking about us?"
"Your name might've come up."
"Does she think we're..."
"She doesn't know what to think. You're probably OK for now. But be careful."
"OK, thanks. Goodnight, Finn."
"Goodnight. And Jake, when I said be careful, I meant it. I'm telling you, man to man... you and Hamilton... be careful."
"We will. I promise you that."
Finn bent down and gave her a hug. "Merry Christmas, Jake."
Then he walked out the door into the cold winter's night.
Author: Depudor
Email: l_brew@email.msn.com
Disclaimer: These characters belong to Steven Antin and Columbia/Tristar Television. No infringement intended.
Summary: This is the sequel to Winter Wonderland. Jake and Hamilton spend Christmas together and compete to give each other the best present, but find their desires - and intentions - to be at odds with each other.
Thanks: To beta beauties Debi and Sue for their support and encouragement, and to Wonka for letting herself get roped into it.
Feedback: Please.
_____________________________________________________________________________
Dinner was subdued compared to the chaotic preparations. Kate was quieter than Jake had seen her at any point in the last four days. Dean Fleming, however, was still in a jubilant mood.
"This goose is really amazing, Kate," he said. "And I didn't think anything could top last year's."
"Yeah, Mrs. Fleming," Jake concurred. "It's great."
"Thank you," Kate replied.
Jake looked at the Dean and added, "The cranberry sauce is really working for me, too."
The Dean smiled, as if he'd known it all along. It was the same knowing smile that Jake had seen so often on Hamilton's face.
"I certainly can't complain," said Finn. "It's so rare that I get a home-cooked meal."
"I know the feeling," Hamilton sighed.
"Hamilton --" his father warned.
But Kate didn't seem to notice. She was still focused on Finn.
Jake looked up and watched them as she chewed. She could sense some kind of tension. She looked across the table at Hamilton to see if he noticed, but his face was staring hungrily down at his food. She knew the only thing on his mind other than eating was the hope that his father wouldn't bring up his English Lit exam.
"So, Finn," the Dean asked, "how did my son do on his English final?"
Hamilton stopped chewing and tried to swallow as he looked up at Finn. His teacher smiled at him and said nothing for a tortuous few seconds until he turned to the Dean and replied, with an approving nod, "I have to tell you, Steven, I was absolutely astounded by some of the things he wrote."
Hamilton almost choked as he swallowed, and he started coughing loudly. His father reached over and clapped him on the back as he said, "Really? How so?"
"Hamilton has quite an imagination, not to mention -- how shall I say? -- an eye for the unusual." Hamilton and Jake exchanged a look as Finn concluded, "I've really enjoyed having him in my class. And Jake as well."
The rest of the meal passed uneventfully. Jake summoned the courage to try the mincemeat pie, once Hamilton assured her that it didn't taste like meat. But it turned out she wasn't such a huge fan of spiced raisins and dates, either.
"Fortunately," Kate said, "I picked up some Christmas cookies at the bakery." She headed back to the kitchen, stopping to ask, "Would anyone like coffee?"
"I'd love some," Finn said.
Dean Fleming got up from the table. "If you'll excuse me for a moment, I'm going to go start a fire."
"Are we moving this party into the living room?" Finn asked as he was left alone with Jake and Hamilton.
"After dinner, we open presents," Hamilton explained.
"You open presents tonight? What do you do tomorrow?"
"We sleep in, then go to church." He looked at Jake. "You can come if you want, no pressure. Then we come home and eat leftovers, because all the restaurants are closed and my mom has some rule against cooking two days in a row."
"She has a rule?" said Jake.
"Yeah. It's some feminist thing... liberation from oppression, female stereotypes, something like that."
"Your mom's my kind of woman," Jake said. She thought she saw Finn nod in agreement, but she wasn't sure.
Hamilton was too busy finishing his pie to notice. "Hey, Mom," he yelled toward the kitchen. "Can we have the coffee and cookies in the living room so we can get started?"
Kate reappeared in the doorway and smiled knowingly at her son. "I'm impressed that you've been as patient as you have, Munchie. This must be a record for you."
Hamilton smirked at her.
"Fine," she conceded, setting a pitcher of egg nog on the table. "I'll set everything out, and you guys can help yourselves if you get hungry."
Hamilton grinned at Jake as he jumped from his seat and tore out of the room. Jake and Finn followed him into the living room and watched him sit on the floor in front of the tree and the presents. Finn picked up his coat off the back of the couch.
"I should probably get going," he said.
"No, stay," the Dean insisted. "You haven't even had your coffee yet."
"But you guys are opening presents, and--"
"So join in the fun. You can have some of Hamilton's presents."
"Hey!" Hamilton protested. His father laughed.
"I really shouldn't," said Finn.
"Of course you should. The present opening won't take that long, and then the boys will go play and we adults can have some brandy and some grown-up conversation. It's been a while since I've checked up on what's going on in the world. I must be the most clueless man alive right now."
Hamilton had to look at Jake again as he tried not to laugh, but she turned to Finn and put a hand on his arm. His presence that evening had been surprisingly comforting for her.
"Please stay," she begged quietly. "I don't feel as much like the odd man out with you here."
"Well... OK," Finn said.
Kate walked into the living room, stopping at the stereo to put on a CD of Christmas carols. "OK what?"
"Finn's going to stay for the festivities," her husband replied.
She looked at Finn, her glare like ice, then turned back to the stereo. "Oh... OK."
"Can I play Santa?" Hamilton asked, grabbing a large gift with a giant red bow.
"Do I ever let you play Santa?" his father asked in reply.
"No."
"And nothing's changed."
Jake laughed as Hamilton's face fell. The Dean took the box from him and sat down on a chair next to the tree. Kate joined Hamilton on the floor. It was an idyllic scene: the three of them before the pile of presents, the fire crackling in the fireplace, the lights of the tree twinkling and reflecting in the frosty panes of the bay windows, the voices of a choir joyously belting out carols from the stereo. Jake just watched for a moment until Finn motioned for her to join him on the loveseat by the fire.
"Here, I saved you a seat in the non-Fleming section."
Dean Fleming looked at the tag on the big box and sighed. "I guess we'll start with Hamilton."
The part of Hamilton that had turned twelve when his father walked in was still with him. Jake watched him, and it made her smile. He was giddy with anticipation. And as he unwrapped his numerous presents, Jake understood why. Not only were the gifts plentiful, they were expensive -- and exactly what he wanted. The deluxe tripod and other photography equipment were from his mother, who was always willing to support his hobby by keeping track of what he needed. The digital camera was a surprise, an added bonus. The Playstation 2 was an even bigger surprise.
"Oh, my God!!," he cried as he ripped away the paper. "How did you get this? They're, like, impossible to find."
The Dean smiled. "Turns out the design engineer -- a Rawley grad."
"No way."
"Way," his mother replied.
Hamilton looked at Jake, expecting her to be as psyched as he was. But Jake's smile had wilted into a frown, the same frown he had seen on her face when she had fled the kitchen the previous morning. It was the frown she always wore when she was thinking about her mother.
"Jake..." Hamilton began, wanting to ask if she was OK but not wanting to sound too concerned.
She forced a smile, not wanting to ruin his fun. But she leaned over to Finn and whispered, "I need to run upstairs for a sec." Finn stopped her as she tried to get up.
"Are you OK?" he asked.
"I can't watch this," she whispered. "I hate to sound like a stupid jealous kid, but... it's just too hard."
"Well, from one stupid jealous kid to another, come with me to get some eggnog."
Finn got up, and Jake followed him into the dining room, motioning to Hamilton to continue with his unwrapping. The other Flemings barely noticed, focused as they were on Hamilton.
"I know it's hard," Finn said quietly. "Hamilton doesn't realize how good he has it. But that's the thing about holidays. They're the best time of year to spend with your family. But the loneliest time of year if you're not with them."
"Why aren't you with your family?"
Finn picked up the carafe of coffee and poured some into a gold-rimmed china cup. "I ask myself that question a lot... Coffee?"
"Sure," Jake said.
He handed her the cup and poured another, staring thoughtfully at it as he explained, "Our lives diverged, and old wounds never got a chance to heal."
"And how do those wounds heal, exactly?"
Finn picked up the pitcher of egg nog and poured some into his coffee. He didn't notice Jake smile, because he was carefully choosing his next words:
"With patience and forgiveness. With realizing that people fail us, because they're not perfect. With communicating, telling them how we feel instead of just holding it all inside. Jake, have you ever told your mother that you feel like she doesn't know you?"
"Um, well... not in those words, no." She poured some egg nog into her own coffee and stirred it.
Finn lowered his voice even more. "You thought it would be better to run off to school, dress up like a boy, and then keep her from finding out about it?"
"She was supposed to find out. That was the original plan. The pre-Hamilton plan."
"Uh-huh. So you can see where the passive-aggressive route got you."
"I thought you were supposed to be helping, not making me feel worse."
"At Rawley we don't coddle our students; we make them think. I'm suggesting that you work on your relationship with your mother by talking to her. If you get the chance, take it. Don't let anger and resentment get in the way. They'll grow and fester until you've gone too far to go back."
Jake considered this as she sipped her coffee. "Maybe I'd rather just get to the point where I don't care anymore."
"No, you don't stop caring. Love can be replaced by hate, but the emotion is still as strong. And Jake, a dysfunctional family is better than no family at all." He walked back to the doorway, looking into the living room, where Kate was opening a present. "You know, nobody's family is perfect, not even Hamilton's. Things just always look that way on the surface."
Jake looked up at him, then peered through the doorway. The Flemings looked so happy, like such the perfect family. Yeah, Jake thought, Hamilton always complained that his father was too wrapped up in his job, but they all seemed to genuinely love each other and want to be together.
"And how are you handling the stress?" Finn asked.
"The stress?"
"Of your charade. Your double life?"
"I guess I've gotten used to it."
"You're pretty good at it, I must say."
"It's the actress in me."
Across the room, Kate looked over and saw them in the doorway, then turned to her husband. "Steven, why don't you let Jake open some presents?"
"All right." He called out, "Jake, come here. Let's see what Santa brought for you."
Jake nodded a silent 'Thank you' to Finn and went to sit down next to Hamilton under the tree. The Dean handed her the gold-wrapped box that Hamilton had eyed that morning. They watched her as she carefully ripped away the paper and opened the box. It contained a stack of computer games.
Jake grinned. "Mrs. Fleming, thank you so much. You didn't have to do that."
"I didn't do anything. Thank Santa." She smiled at Hamilton, but he was looking at Jake. Kate turned around to see Finn watching all this from the dining room doorway, and she got up and approached him, glowering.
Finn knew he was in for it.
"You said you weren't coming," she snapped as she walked past him to the table, keeping her voice low enough that it wouldn't carry over the Christmas carols.
"No, *you* said I wasn't coming. I made no promises."
"You shouldn't be here."
"I know."
"In my home, with my family --"
"I know."
"This is a holiday. It's a sacred time."
"I know."
"So why are you here?"
Finn sighed. "I don't know." But that wasn't true.
Kate poured herself a cup of coffee and drilled her nails on the side of the cup. She didn't look at him as she said, "Just wanted to ruin my Christmas, huh?"
"I didn't think having me here would ruin it for you."
Now she turned her glare back on him. "What did you think I would--"
"You know, Kate, not everything is about you," he interrupted. "Jake is going through a rough time. Could you imagine being sixteen and getting ditched by your mother -- your only family -- at Christmas?"
"Don't get me started on Jake."
"Is there a problem?"
Kate looked through the doorway as Jake unwrapped another gift. "I don't want to talk about this," she said. "It's Christmas."
Finn looked at his watch. "Not for another three hours, actually."
Kate rolled her eyes but said nothing. Normally, she would have shot right back at him, but now she was distracted, watching her son watch Jake open the presents from his best friend.
"Ah, yes..." Finn said, following her gaze toward the tree, where Jake was examining the unwrapped box.
"A CD burner!" Jake exclaimed.
"Not just any CD burner," Hamilton corrected her. "Look at the stacked drives. You can make multiple copies at the same time."
"Oh, my God. That's so unbelievably cool. Thanks, man."
Hamilton grinned, delighted that Jake was so happy.
"Now I know what you needed all that money for," his father commented. He turned to find and Kate and Finn in the doorway and explained, "When I gave him his allowance last week, he asked if he qualified for a Christmas bonus."
Finn laughed and looked at Kate, who wasn't laughing. She was still watching Hamilton. Finn eyed her for a moment, then whispered, "You know, Kate, believe it or not, there are going to be things in his life that are none of your business."
"You know something about this?"
"I know I wouldn't rush to assume anything. I was a 16-year-old boy once, and I know it can be a confusing time. And Jake is... well... Jake could make any heterosexual boy confused."
Kate mulled this over. "I don't think Jake will be staying over here again."
"That's too bad. 'Cause Jake's a great kid. A really great kid, who happens to be going through a lot right now. It's bad enough getting sent away to school, but then to be denied Christmas with your family... Can you imagine what that would do to a kid?"
She shook her head, but she wasn't thinking about Jake. "I can't believe you know something about this and I don't."
Finn looked at her, and he almost laughed, because he knew that ultimately what she was grappling with wasn't whether or not her son was gay, but rather the fact that he had a life of his own. "Kate you're right," he said finally, still keeping his voice below the music from the stereo. He waited until he had her attention, and then he continued, "This isn't my family, and I have no place here. But as someone who cares about you, and who cares about your son, let me offer you one piece of advice."
"What?"
"Let Hamilton work this out on his own. I know that's almost impossible for you, but don't get involved."
She sighed but said nothing. Across the room, her husband handed another gift to Hamilton.
"Ham, here's another one from me. Sorry, nothing electronic in there."
Hamilton ripped away the ribbon and paper and opened the box. He pulled out three books and a small, flat box all tied together with a ribbon.
"No offense to Finn," the Dean said with a smile, casting a glance toward the doorway, "but I feel that your literary education leans too heavily toward Western civilization. So, I put together something with an Asian theme. Siddhartha, the Bhagavad Gita, and some Basho."
"And a zen rock garden?" Hamilton added, looking at the small box.
"It's all a theme. Just so you know there's more to the Orient than egg rolls and feng shui."
Kate couldn't help but smile at Finn, knowing what he was going to say.
"Siddhartha was written by a German," Finn mumbled.
"I know," Kate whispered. "But I guess we can't get away from the West altogether, can we?" The smile on her face faded slowly as she saw Hamilton set the books aside and move on to something else. She furrowed her brow, and a sadness settled in her eyes. "He loves Hamilton so much. I wish Hamilton could see it. Maybe Steven doesn't express it in the best way, but he's always thinking about him, about what he's learning, how he's developing, how prepared he is to go out into the big world."
Finn stood silently for a moment, then turned and walked back to the table, where he set down his coffee cup. "Kate, I think it's time for me to be on my way."
"You don't have to leave. I'm sorry I was so..."
"Rude?"
"Yes. It's just... this is hard."
"I know." He held her gaze for a moment, then turned and walked back into the living room. He picked up his coat from the back of the couch. "Steven, thanks for having me, but I do need to get going."
"But Finn, we're almost done, and then we'll have a nightcap before you go back out into the cold."
"I shouldn't. I need to get up early tomorrow and drive up to the mountain. But it was a lovely dinner. Jake, Hamilton, enjoy the rest of your Christmas." The Dean started to rise, but Finn stopped him. "Don't get up. If you don't mind, I'll have Jake walk me to the door."
The Dean sat back down and nodded. "OK. Merry Christmas, Finn," he said.
"Merry Christmas to you all," Finn replied. Jake got up and followed him into the hallway and to the front door.
"Thanks for the talk," she said.
"My pleasure." He opened the door. "That wasn't so bad, was it?"
"No, not so bad... Were, um, you and Mrs. Fleming talking about us?"
"Your name might've come up."
"Does she think we're..."
"She doesn't know what to think. You're probably OK for now. But be careful."
"OK, thanks. Goodnight, Finn."
"Goodnight. And Jake, when I said be careful, I meant it. I'm telling you, man to man... you and Hamilton... be careful."
"We will. I promise you that."
Finn bent down and gave her a hug. "Merry Christmas, Jake."
Then he walked out the door into the cold winter's night.