Name:
Carnival Night
Couples:
2+3
Time:
Episode 36 though I rewrote a bit (understatement)
Rating:
PG (mild curses)
Warning:
Shounen-ai, curses
Key:
*Thought*
~(-Point
of View-)~
~Time~
Disclaimer:
I
don't own Gundam Wing or any of its characters. Don't sue me, I'm poor.
Carnival Night
~IV~ Chapter Four ~IV~
~(-Trowa-)~
We
slowly walk back to my trailer, not wanting the night to end. Duo walks
silently beside me. He looks worried and he keeps opening and closing his
mouth, as though he's trying to say something but changes his mind, over and
over again.
We're
there now, standing in front of my trailer, unsure of what to do. Duo rubs the
back of his neck and looks away.
"Will
you come back?" I ask.
Duo
drops his hand.
"Trowa...I
have to tell you something..."
"What
is it?" I ask when he doesn't continue.
He
shuffles his feet and looks up at me, violet eyes unfocusing for a minute.
"I
can't come back," He says quickly.
~(-Duo-)~
*Damn
it, damn it, damn it! Just tell him!*
Trowa
looks hurt, well sort of, I can tell by his eyes though his face doesn't
change.
"Alright,
I understand" he says. "Good night then Duo" He turns to his trailer door, his
hand on the handle.
"No
wait!" I say, grabbing his arm.
He
turns back and drops his hand.
"That's
not what I meant" I say. "What I mean is..."
*Just
spit it out!*
"I'd
like to see you again, but I can't"
*Dumbass*
"Why?"
Trowa asks.
I
look down unable to look him in the eye.
"I
like you Trowa, but I can't do this, there's something I have to do. I promise,
as soon as I'm done I'll come looking for you, that is...If it's okay with you"
I
look up as Trowa touches my chin lightly, bringing my face up to his. I wrap my
arms around his neck as he kisses me, his arms going around my waist. 'He's so
warm' is all I can think as my brain is filled with fuzz.
We
pull back but only inches, his breath warm on my cheek.
"I
want to see you again," he says quietly.
"I'll
come back for you, I promise," I whisper.
One
more kiss before we reluctantly pull apart. My heart aches, fearing that I'll
never see him again.
I
will keep my promise, but only if I'm alive to see it through. So that's my
decision, I won't tell him, I'll let him live his life happily, peacefully. And
I'll fight so that he can live freely.
"Good
bye" I say, walking backward.
"Good
bye" he says, hugging him self against the cold.
I
can't stand it anymore. I turn and run as fast as I can.
~(-Trowa-)~
I
watch until I can't see him anymore, and a while after. The cold that I had
almost forgotten creeps back. I shiver and rub my hands up my arms. I take one
last longing glance back to where he disappeared before turning back to my
trailer.
It's
warm inside. I walk up the metal steps and into the large trailer.
"Trowa?"
Cathy calls, running up from the other side of the trailer.
"Hi
Cathy" I say, walking past her and heading straight to my 'room', which is just
a corner with a screen in front for privacy.
She
follows me though.
"So
how was it?" she asks. "Who was she?"
"I
didn't go out with a girl, I told you that" I give her the cold shoulder. I
love Cathy and all but I'm just not in the mood.
"You're
lying," She says matter-of-factly. "Cindy saw you with a girl, she said she was
pretty cute though she didn't know that was your type, she said she seemed
very...energetic"
Something
bugs me about Cindy thinking Duo is a girl, it makes my skin crawl and I feel
defensive, but I keep my mouth shut, for now anyway.
"Then
she said that I should talk to Lou because she saw you two walking toward the
Farris Wheel, so I did and he said you had been on there with some brown haired
girl and the two of you were getting very
friendly" she's smiling slyly. "So who is she?"
"I
don't want to talk about it," I say.
Grabbing
an apple from the bowl on the table I go to my 'room' to brood over losing Duo,
even if it was only temporarily. I already felt cold and alone again. I pulled
the covers over my head, forgetting about the apple in my hand and not
bothering to take off my clothes, not even my shoes.
"Trowa?"
Cathy calls softly.
I
can hear her kneel beside my bed.
"Trowa?"
she puts her hand on my shoulder and shakes it.
"I
don't want to talk about it Cathy" I repeat, keeping the covers over my head.
"I'm
sorry about pushing you, we won't talk about it. Do you want something to eat?"
"...Yes.
Thank you, Cathy"
"Any
time Trowa"
~(-Hilde-)~
Duo's
depressed again. I can tell he's really
depressed because he's really trying not to show it.
"Hey
Hilde!" He calls.
I
sigh and turn away from my computer, a cheerful smile on my face.
"What's
up Duo?" I ask as he comes bounding in to the room.
"I'm
bored, ya wanna go out?"
I
shake my head.
"I
have a lot of work to do Duo, I have to get this done before tomorrow," I say.
Duo
pouts.
"Aw
come on Hil', please? Just for a little while? It's boring here! When was the
last time you were outside? Come on! Let's go to the arcade! The guys that work
there won't look at me so funny if you come with me"
"Duo!
We can't afford to go to the arcade! I'm already looking for a side job to pay
the rent, we're way behind on everything!"
Duo
quirks an eyebrow.
"Well
why didn't you say so? I'll get another job. I could use a good challenge. Find
anything?"
I
shrug.
"Not
really, nothing local. There is one thing, but it's kinda far. Winner Natural
Resources are looking for employees but it's all the way in the L4 cluster, we
would need to sell the shop to go"
"Winner
Resources?" He asks excitedly.
"Yeah"
I answer. "I thought they were out'a business since the head of the company was
killed, must be new management"
Duo
smiles, a slow smile that actually looks genuine.
"New
management...." He says. "Then he's still alive..."
~(-Duo-)~
I
lounge in a chair, smiling to myself.
*So
he's back...It's not looking so helpless after all*
The
door behind me slides open and I can hear Quatre laughing softly and speaking
in low voice.
"Nice
digs" I say.
I
sit up in the high-backed office chair, placing my chin on the back and peering
at the shocked blond.
He
blinks and smiles.
"Duo!"
he runs up behind the chair laughing and pulls me up into a tight hug. "Where
have you been?" he asks quietly.
I
pull away and laugh.
"Living
in L2 with a friend of mine. Where've you
been? I haven't heard from you since we left earth! I didn't even know if you'd
lived until I heard-" I stop as he looks down, I've hit an old wound.
"Since
Zero" he whispers.
"What
happened?" I ask softly, guiding him over to a small table.
"It's
a long story," he says.
"I've
got time"
~(-Quatre-)~
"...I
don't even know if he's alive Duo...somehow...somehow I feel that he is but...I
might have killed him..." I can't look at him as I speak.
Trowa's
death -if that was the case- had been on my mind and in my heart since I
watched the Vayeate explode. My weakness had lead me to kill the only person
who understood me, he understood me more then I understood myself.
"Quatre..."
The
emotion I feel in Duo's heart confuses me and when I look up, so does the
shadowed look in his eyes.
"What
is it?" I ask.
I'm
afraid, I admit it. I'm afraid because there is a strong emotion in Duo's eye's
and heart, but I don't know what it is, I can't help him, I can't understand,
and it hurts, the emotion is hurting him.
"Trowa
is alive," He says quietly, looking away.
A
wave of shock, relief, then disbelief washes over me at his words.
*He's
alive? But why does Duo sound so...sad?*
"He's
alive?" I ask, afraid that I heard him wrong.
He
nods.
I
clutch my heart, unsure of what I should be feeling. I'm relieved. Trowa isn't
dead because of me and I'm glad. But something is haunting me. Guilt. I'm still
guilty. I could have killed him, easily.
I
look back to Duo; he's staring out the window. I clutch my heart tighter, and
calm myself, feeling for what is wrong. He's hiding something from me.
"Duo?
What's wrong?" I ask.
He
bites his lip.
"Trowa
doesn't remember," he says quietly.
"What
do you mean? He doesn't remember our fight?"
He
turns to me and shakes his head.
"He
doesn't remember anything," he says. "The war, the Gundams, he thinks he's
lived at a circus all his life with his sister"
My
mind is numb, the only thing I can process is:
"His
sister? Trowa has a sister?" I ask.
Duo
shrugs. "I'm not sure, he never mentioned her?"
I
shake my head.
"I
don't know," he whispers.
He
looks out of the window, his eyes not focusing on one thing for long.
"Where
is he?" I ask.
Duo
hesitates.
"Duo?
Where is he?" I ask again.
"I
can't tell you," he says slowly.
"Why
can't you tell me?" I ask.
I
thought Duo trusted me...oh god. He doesn't anymore! He thinks I'll hurt him!
H-he thinks I'm a danger...
"Please
Duo" I beg. "I'd never hurt him, ever. I need to tell him I'm sorry"
Duo
thinks a moment.
"I
know," he says quietly. He's silent a moment before he turns to face me.
"Alright...but Quatre?"
"Yes?"
"He
has a good life there, his sister, who ever she is, she loves him, and I think
he loves her. Just remember that"
An End
(To be continued in the
epilogue)
Whew!
Okay! On to the epilogue! Love you all!
Nikki :-P