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Disclaimer: The copyrighted characters in this story belong to FUNimation, Akira Toriyama, and others, and do not belong to me. I make no money from this story at all.

I got the inspiration for this story from some fan art I saw at B-Chan's site, and Dragon Ball GS story by Matches, so, go to the site, and read her story, if you want to at www.gurlpages.com/art/b-chan

Goku was a hungry.

This was no surprise, she was always hungry, but what was she going to hunt today? She had caught bear earlier this week, and tiger was no where to be seen, so-

Ah! Fish!

It had been a while since she had caught any fish, and there were some good sized ones nearby…but first she had chores. It was easy enough to axe the dead wood and roll is down hill.

"HIIIYYYAAAA!" she screamed, her fist smacking into the wood, causing it to splinter heavily, landing into perfect rectangles, and piled itself neatly by the door to her little house.

"Well, chores 'er done, so let's go get that fish!"

"Oh, yeah," she said to herself, "I forgot to say bye to grandpa," she whispered, sounding the tiniest bit lonely as she said it. Walking inside the house, she looked at the round sphere that had been one of her grandpa's prize possessions. Bowing into front of it, she asked grandpa for help with getting the fish. That done, she ran outside, laughing with the shear joy of running, feeling the air, jumping through trees-

Falling, she shucked her clothes, and turned the drop into a dive-

SPLASH!

Her tail dragged behind her, the only thing that did, as she saw one of the huge monsters that liked to eat the smaller ones. AH! Dinner!

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Bulma stopped along the roadside, and looked around. He was miles from civilization, and had yet to come even close to what he was looking for.

Ahead? Yes, it was, and he thought he could see a house! Dammit! Someone already had the ball!

Getting in his car, he sped up the winding road, until-

"WAS THAT A GIANT FISH?"

He had screamed, and swerved, but didn't make it, colliding with the giant fish, and heard someone yell.

"My Kami!" he said, his voice two octaves too high. "I hit a giant talking fish!"

"Ite!!"

Bulma sat in the car in shock, while she saw a little girl, holding a bo staff, suddenly attack the front of his car.

"I don't know what kind of beetle monster you are, but there is no way that I am going to let you get my fish!"

Scared out of his mind, Bulma drew an Uzi from under his car seat and started showering the bizarre girl with bullets.

"What? You think you can stop me with those little ouches, monster? Well, you have another thing comin'!

Bulma found himself being thrown through the air. His car landed with a thunk- While the crazy girl with the bo staff was starting to whack the hood, yelling about a demon.

"WAIT! I'm a human! Don't kill me!" Bulma shouted, getting out.

"You're a human?" the girl asked, and Bulma nodded hard, putting his hands in the air. This kid was stronger than an ox!

The little girl circled him warily, her staff leveled at his chest.

"You look different than me," the girl said to herself. "More flat, and- square, sort of."

"Duh, kid, that's because I'm a guy, not some sort of barbarian Amazon like you."

The girl just looked puzzled, then jumped back.

"So, uh, guys don't have tails?"

Bulma blinked. "Sort of we do, in the front- why are you wearing that weird thing, anyway?"

"What weird thing?" the girl asked, and looked around behind her. She ignored the tail completely.

Bulma sighed. This girl was so nuts that she didn't even realize she was wearing a fake tail… He grimaced, and then realized he had no clue who this person was.

"Hey, kid, what's your name."

"Son Goku!"

He blinked. "The monkey god? That must be why you wear that weird thing… I'm Bulma."

Goku snickered. "Doesn't that mean 'bloomers'?"

"I can't help it if my dad is a perv." Bulma looked away, annoyed.

"Um, I haven't seen another person for a long time. Do you want to come get something to eat?" asked the girl, and Bulma shrugged. A sixteen-year-old boy never turns down food.

They went back to Goku's little cottage, and Bulma nearly had an aneurysm. The Dragon Ball he was looking for was right in front of him!

"WHOAH! There it is!" he yelled, and ran for it, but it was snatched up and held protectively to Goku's chest before he could get his hands on it.

"What do you want Grandpa for?" she asked suspiciously, little black eyes narrowed.

"You are one messed up kid," he told her. "That is not your Grandpa! Its not even alive!"

"I know, but it was what he gave me before he died!"

Bulma blinked. He still wanted the Dragon Ball, but that was, well, kind of sad. Too bad it wouldn't stop him.

"Can I have it? After all, you did ruin my car!"

"NO!"

"All right then, you want something?" he asked, trying to think of something he could give her that she might want-

If the situation were reversed, I would offer the guy to show him my underwear. Somehow I don't think that would work here.

"So, uh, you want to come on my quest?"

Goku looked at him funny.

"What quest?"

"To find the seven magic Dragon Balls!" Bulma exclaimed, and put the balls he had collected out on the table. They glowed with a light from deep inside, in response to the presence of their mate.

"Grandpa is trying to tell me something!" Goku said in excitement, kneeling beside the table to get a better look at all of them. Her eyes were wide with joy.

"Kid- that isn't your grandfather-" then he got an idea.

"I think it means that your grandfather wants you to come with me," Bulma said, wincing only a little at the lie. Of course, there was no reason to believe that her grandfather didn't want her to go with him- although why he would, he couldn't begin to guess…

"You think so?" she asked, softly, her eyes nearly filled with tears.

Bulma nodded emphatically.

Goku brightened. "It would be neat to go see the city, and stuff. I'll go!"

Bulma snickered to himself.

I might need a bodyguard, and this kid would make a great fall person, if something should go wrong…

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Bulma grinned, as he opened up one of his capsules. This was going to be too easy…

He had explained the legend of the Eternal Dragon, and the kid was going with him, and now-

"I know what a boy is, now! YOU'RE A DEMON!"

"Huh?" he asked, confused. He had just opened his hoi poi capsule.

"Kid, that is not anything to do with a demon! I am not a demon, either!"

Bulma was looking at the motorcycle he had just opened, and at the girl who was staring at it like it was some kind of monster. Then, of course, if this kid had never been to the city-

"Stupid hick," he muttered, and got on to the bike.

"You coming?" he asked her, and saw that her eyes were wide with shock.

"How did you capture that thing?" she asked, mouth open.

"Its not alive, you silly twit!"

"Oh."

Firmly picking the little girl up, he sat her on the seat, and ignored the tail, which lashed around, in confusion and surprise.

They were off!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Bulma was shaking as he got back onto the bike, after what had happened.

He had stopped, "to water a tree," he had told Goku, which had completely confused her, and had been attacked by a flying dinosaur. Then, had been saved by Goku. Then, realized he hated heights. Probably because Goku had saved him by throwing her staff through his shirt- and he had wetted himself.

They got back on the bike, after Bulma had changed his clothes, and drove until sunset.

"We need to stop for the night-" Bulma began, and Goku sprang down with some relief onto the non-moving ground.

"I get the soft leaves!"

"You can have them, shorty. I have something better in mind."

Bulma quickly popped open another capsule, and as before, Goku freaked out.

"Stay back, Bulma, I'll fight it while you get away!"

"Dufus," he muttered, and headed inside, and turned on the lights inside the door of the capsule house. This time, Goku gaped in awe.

"You made it light in here, even though its night!"

Bulma sighed. This was getting repetitive.

Then he took a deep breath. Gagged. Realized where the smell was coming from.

"Oh, man, kid, when was the last time you bathed!"

Goku looked at him with wide, trusting eyes.

"What's a bath?"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Bulma was muttering to himself as he got the bath ready for Goku.

"Now, I would have dreams about the girl I would wish for, and giving her a bath. Now, I am giving a scrawny little pipsqueak that smells a bath. Man, Kami-sama must hate me."

Goku then chose to walk into the room, and stared at the tub filled with water.

"What is all that white stuff?"

"Its soap, Goku," Bulma said, exasperated, his back still to her Turning, he choked, nearly getting a nosebleed.

The little girl had taken off all her clothes, like he had told her to, and she was still in that 'child-shaped' stage, meaning, she was pretty much figureless. While muscle that came from living in the wilderness was there, so were the remnants of baby fat. She was really very cute, actually.

Still, she was the first naked girl that he had ever seen, and a nosebleed was the inevitable result.

Goku watched in awe as a stream of blood erupted from this nose.

"Woah, cool trick!"

Hastily wiping his nose, Bulma grunted, picked up the girl by her armpits, and chucked her in the water.

There was a loud squeal of delight as she hit the warm water. "This is fun!"

Bulma gave a put upon sigh, and picked up a bottle of shampoo. It was a nice one that smelled of roses.

Goku had her back to him as she purred with contentment. She was warm, and it had been a long time since she had company. Being a simple girl, it was the simple things that made her happy.

Bulma was getting a good look at the tail attached to her backside.

"I can't believe someone actually glued that thing to your rear," he muttered, and got up to get some scissors.

"Okay, while you do that, I'll scrub my back!" Goku added cheerfully, and picked up a nearby scrub brush with her tail. She was really getting into this washing thing!

"Your…tail…moved," Bulma stated, frozen in place.

"Why shouldn't it?"

Eyes wide with shock, he went over, and watched as it moved the brush back and forth, rubbing his little friend's back. Before he could stop himself, he grabbed the tail, hard.

"AHHHHHHHHH!"

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Bulma stepped into the shower, his mind still reeling from the new weirdness he had stumbled into.

"That kid really does have a tail…" he muttered over and over, breathing in the thick steam. Then, he felt a draft, as the shower door was opened-

"OH! So that's the difference between boys and girls. You have hairless tails in the front- And, Mr. Bulma, if you have balls already, why are you looking for a dragon's?"

Needless to say, Bulma was no happy.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

The fiasco with the food was not something Bulma cared to remember, and got up the next morning, his hair in a cowlick, wearing an old pair of sweat pants. Coffee, and bread… Ah- breakfast.

"What's that?" asked Goku, looking at the dark liquid that dripped from the coffee maker.

Bulma sighed, again answering the girl's questions.

"It's something you drink. It's called coffee," he picked up a mug and handed her some. "Try it."

"Ugh, this tea is awful."

"That's why you add- hey, where you going?" Bulma asked, still half asleep.

"To train!" Goku said as she walked out of the capsule house. Sleepily, Bulma followed her out, to see her do move a really big rock.

Then, she tried to move another big rock, and it protested.

It was a sea turtle, which was rather lost.

Goku was a nice girl. When she made a new friend, she wanted to help. So, she volunteered to take her new friend back to the ocean, when Bulma pointed the way.

It was no big deal getting there. All she had to do go through a real ugly monster. Didn't take that long at all.

Gasping, she kept running, and heard a familiar sound behind her-

Bulma was catching up to them, on his motorcycle.

His expression said that he was less than happy to have been left alone.

"Here we are!" announced the turtle, and Goku turned to see the BIGGEST lake she had ever seen in her life, and said so.

"That's the ocean, stupid."

"Why does it smell funny?" She went over and tasted the water. She promptly spit it out.

"That tastes even worse than your tea, Bulma!"

"Its because of the salt, moron."

The turtle had left already, and they just watched him go. Wait a minute- he was coming back?

"Hello, there," said a quavering old voice. An elderly man, dressed in a Hawaiian shirt, was standing on the turtle's back, Goku almost giggled.

"Hi, old-timer!" she shouted back, and grinned at him.

"So, you must be the little girl that helped my friend, here?"

Goku nodded. Bulma was watching this whole thing with amusement.

"I need to repay you for that. So- I will grant you immortality! COME TO ME, IMMORTAL PHOENIX!"

"Uh, master?" said the turtle, tugging on the old man's shirt. "Didn't the phoenix meet up with some bad bird seed?'

The old guy seemed to blink behind his funky sunglasses.

"Oh, um yes, then- Come to me, kinto'un!"

A small, golden cloud whizzed out of nowhere, and seemed to screech to a stop in front of them. Goku smiled hugely. She thought that the little cloud was adorable.

"Now, if you are pure of heart, this cloud will take you anywhere!" the old man said, and gestured towards the cloud. "To demonstrate-" he stepped up, placing his weight on the small cloud- and promptly fell through.

"You must have cheated on the crossword again," muttered the turtle, while the old man's face turned red.

"Ah, yes, well," he turned to his visitors. "I am Kame'sennin Roshi. Pleased to meet you," he said, and bowed. Goku grinned, and bowed back.

"I'm Goku," she told him, and bounced over to the little cloud, inspecting it all over, before jumping on it. She laughed in joy as it held her weight, and they sped off, swooping through the air.

"They make a good team," said Roshi, and turned to the bemused Bulma. Of course, it was then that she noticed-

"What is that around your neck?" Bulma sputtered, in shock, seeing a dragon ball.

"This old thing? It washed up on my island a long time ago."

"I helped the turtle to, can I have it?"

"No, you didn't," said the turtle, before Bulma stepped on his head.

Roshi looked thoughtful for a moment, then drooled. This made Bulma step back.

"Can I have a pair of young Goku's panties? I'll give this to you, then," Roshi said, still drooling.

Man, this guy is disgusting… Bulma thought, but smirked to himself. He reached into pocket, and pulled out the capsule that had some of Goku's dirty clothes. Roshi laughed lecherously as he took the underwear.

Bulma's smirk got broader as he took the dragon ball from around that guy's neck.

"Hey, Goku, we can leave now!" he shouted at the delighted Goku, who was still bouncing along on her cloud.

"Okay, Mr. Bulma!"

To be continued.

A/N: Yes, I did not change Master Roshi's gender. I decided that a full gender switch of everyone would be too hard, because I just can't imagine an old hentai granny. I have known old hentai men, but most of the older ladies that I know have been to dignified to be like that old pervert. Plus, keeping some of the males, well, male, will add an interesting dynamic to the story. I hope you like this!