Again the little demon enraged me and sent me pacing my apartment like a caged animal, when he told me that he and Angel would be going to Sunnydale and that I was not going to be able to be there. I could have taken his head off of his shoulders without a second thought. He then proceeded to rake me over the coals about following Angel. He told me I was supposed to be letting him take care of it and that this was my break before things got really heavy. I insisted that I was going to Sunnydale. He explained that in such a small town I would definitely draw attention and I could not enter Angel's life yet, everything that we had worked for was about to be upon us and that meant that I had to keep my distance for just a little while longer.
I watched from across the street as the car pulled away. I then crossed the street and went into the apartment that my Angel had spent so much of his time in. I walked through the apartment touching a thing or two that I know he would have touched, or seeing a thing the way he would have seen it. I then went into the room that I chose to be his before he came to know this as a home and I looked around the only thing that he left was a sketch that had fallen under the bed. I picked up the seemingly fragile piece of parchment that he used in his charcoal drawing and looked at the picture the he spent time drawing. What broke my heart was that is was of her. I knew that he loved her because the love could be seen in the lines, how each stroke was placed with such love and care that it brought tears to my eyes.
Right before Whistler left he introduced me to someone. He said that this man would be someone that I would need to get to know and so I met Doyle. The Irish half demon made me laugh, he reminded me of the home that I had left so many years ago. During the time after Angel left he became my friend. I was never allowed to have friends after I became the Protector. No one even knew what I was except for Doyle and Whistler. Sure there have been prophecies and theories written about me, but no one knew for sure whether or not I existed. They certainly didn't know the rules I had to live by or what exactly I was supposed to protect, they just knew that one was to come. Some even assumed that the Protector was the Slayer. Like I said only Doyle knew the truth.
So for the next three years I stayed in LA pretty much, although I took this time to travel a little bit, and I spent a lot of time in my favorite thinking spot in Paris. I got to know Doyle pretty well and kept up with news in Sunnydale. I knew that the Slayer would protect him and that I was not to go to him unless Whistler told me I could.
You could say that it was definitely a shock when I heard about Angelus showing his face for a few months, and I panicked when I heard that he was sent to hell. The time that he was in hell was the only time that I was ever allowed to directly intercede on his behalf, he was so broken by the time we got him out that he didn't even remember that I was there at all. I was thankful for that. I had to use some powerful magic to get him out. Even then I had to wait until Buffy left the ring that Angel gave her in the mansion so that I could get to it to get him out. I don't think that they planned for him to go to hell, that was an unforeseen thing that makes life spontaneous. I had to be in the same room as when he was sent there to get him out, and I know that he saw me for the first time since that day on the street in Galway. He healed fine and he and Buffy worked through a lot of their problems, but in the end he left.
I understand his whole reasoning he is a noble man by nature, good, kind, caring, and considerate. He thinks of everyone else before himself, and his guilt has no rival. I saw this even back in that drunken boy I fell in love with. The first time I looked into his face I could see that he was just rebelling that everything in his nature screamed against doing some of the things that he was doing. But anyway, he left her so that she could have a normal life, so that she could have everything that he couldn't give her. Leaving caused him so much pain; it was palpable when you were near him.
After he came back to LA, Doyle approached him. I couldn't believe it, Doyle was to be his seer. Now I knew why I had to meet him a few years ago. Doyle was reluctant to be the seer but in the end he didn't have much of a choice. And when he died I felt his loss keenly, because he had been my only friend besides Whistler. After Doyle started working with Angel, all he talked about was Cordelia. It became obvious that Doyle loved her, and when he died she was to be the seer. This did not surprise me at all. Angel trusted her and she was a good one to have, even though the choice wasn't really hers. Sometimes the PTB have a funny way of picking their messengers.
I stayed in the shadows as Angel mourned the loss of Buffy, and then the loss of Doyle. I think his work saving souls and the reappearance of Wesley and the support of Cordelia really helped him to survive that year. After the Prophecies of Aberjian were found and his link to the powers complete I got the go ahead to appear. I got my first dream after that, and from what I learned I knew that the coming battles wouldn't be easy.
Before I showed myself I let them get settled into their new office, and Angel into his new apartment. I knew the other held memories for him that he was reluctant to let go of, but maybe that is something that he needed to do. I had also heard of everything that had happened with Buffy and I knew that he was slowly beginning to see that maybe she wasn't the only person he could love. That maybe there was something else out there for him. I also watched as he made new friends. He hired the young vampire hunter Gunn to help him with his battles against all of the demons that he was facing since coming to LA.
I decided that it was time, so I dressed in my favorite outfit which was all black (great for blending into the shadows, which I know almost as much as Angel does about that) and I walked into their office.
********
I knew Doyle was dead but this was my link to them and a way to get them to trust me, I think that was why our friendship was so important, he was my link to Angel and my way in. So I walked into their office and looked at Cordelia who smiled pleasantly at me while Wesley nodded acknowledging my existence and I asked, "Is this Angel Investigations?" She said in a cheerful voice, "Yeah we help the hopeless, can I help you? Would you like some coffee?" I nodded to her, and she fixed me a cup, as she was pouring it I told her why I was there.
"I am looking for Doyle, he and I are old friends and last I heard he was working here" As soon as I said his name she dropped the coffee mug that she was holding. At the sound of the ceramic hitting the hard wood floor Angel and Gunn came flying into the room from somewhere in the back. She just stood there shocked staring at me. Her eyes filled with tears and when Angel asked her what was wrong she just simply pointed at me. This time Wesley spoke, "I am very sorry to tell you this Miss" "Renee" I interrupted him, "Renee" he corrected himself "but Doyle pasted away at the end of last November." Angel not quite sure how to handle the situation looked from me to Cordelia to Wesley, Cordelia looking like she was going to break down and Gunn just looking on trying to figure out what was going on, and Wesley moving to comfort me as I looked up in a fake shock. I even shed a few tears, lord knows I have shed a few over his death what was a few more.
Angel being the cool one that he was recovered quickly from the shock that after so many months someone would come into their new office looking for Doyle. He asked me if there was anything that he could do for me. I looked at him for a moment then decided that being more honest was the best way to go, I said, "I came to see you actually. Doyle and I met because of you." He then looked at me with confusion marring his perfect features. "I met Doyle through a friend, and he became my friend, but in the last year I have been away in Paris and we hadn't really talked, so as soon as I got back I figured that he and I should get together, I really missed him." "But that doesn't explain why you met because of me" he said a little forcefully. My reply with a slight hint of a smile was, "no it doesn't, but I would prefer if we discussed that particular topic in private, if you don't mind." He simple nodded and then ushered me into his office where he closed the door behind him.
Being that close to him after all this time of not was almost overwhelming. He motioned for me to take a seat on the other side of his desk where he had a taken his seat, he laced his hand together with his elbows propped on the armrests of his chair waiting patiently for me to tell him why I was really there. The emotions running through me almost caused me to spill everything right then and there, but he still could not know that I was the Protector, he could only know that I was the dreamer. I took a second to look around his office, he had old texts laying on his desk and paintings that I am sure were done by him on the walls, and even a few photographs of the people that were out in his office and even one of the people from Sunnydale. I swallowed compulsively and looked at him. I told him that I knew he had the Prophecies of Aberjian and that it completely his link to the PTB. I then proceeded to tell him that I completed that link. I was sent to help him. I was the Dreamer. He stared at me in shock. The next words out of his mouth actually came as a shock to me "Do you know what the prophecy says?" I just shook my head. I only knew of the prophecies but not what they contain. I knew their purpose for him, which was to complete the link to the powers, but not anything more. I think that finding all of this out was somewhat of a shock. I also knew that he lost the Oracles, which happened to be his most direct link to the powers. I was their replacement, and I told him as such.
I needed to explain my abilities as the Dreamer to him. "I am the Dreamer, I have been given the power to speak directly to the powers or one of their channels. It takes a lot of power to address the powers directly, but some of the lesser channels can be just as helpful. The easiest happens to be Whistler, I have actually spoken to him several times in the few weeks that I have been the Dreamer." At the sound of Whistler's name he tensed. I smiled at him and his reaction to the annoying little demon, and I answered his unspoken question, "Yes I know Whistler. He is kind of like my guide, which is why he is the easiest to get in touch with. Besides if I ask him a question and he doesn't know the answer then he has ways to find out the answers without me having to sleep for a week." He looked at me in almost sympathy, I think because he knew what it was like to be in the care of Whistler. I didn't dare tell him that while he only spent a few months I spent nearly a century with the demon. I looked at Angel while he took in everything that I just told him then told him one of my purposes, "I want to work with you, I don't need the money, but there is a reason that I am here now and that is to help you." I thought for a second that he would protest, but he didn't. He simply nodded and then motioned to the door where he and I both knew that the other three occupants of the offices were trying to listen to what was going on.
At his motion the three filed in with sheepish looks on their faces that caused both of us to smile. Angel then addressed them, "This is Renee..." then he looked at me expectantly to fill in the blank that existed "Edmunds" I volunteered. At the sound of my last name his eyes darted to me and momentarily clouded with memory and sadness. I smiled at him and then he continued. "Renee Edmunds and she will be working with us." Then he looked at Wesley and said in a low voice, "She is the Dreamer." Cordelia and Gunn looked at him and then me with confusion, while Wesley's look went from shocked to awe rather quickly. Cordelia looked at him and asked the inevitable question "What is the Dreamer?" He looked at her and said, "Another link to the Powers, Cordelia" with that her look changed to hopefulness. She looked at me wide-eyed and full of hope and asked, "Does this mean no more mind numbing visions?" I looked at her sadly and shook my head. "I am here to assist and find answers to questions but you still get the pictures and you will see what they want you to see. You can think of me as your own private Oracles." The disappointment on her face saddened me a little bit, I hated not being able to help her, and I as sorry that she didn't ask for this and she didn't choose the path her life has taken it was just dumped on her.
After a little while of a getting to know one another and talking about how things worked around the office we were all sitting there and Angel asked if any of them had any luck finding out what was in the box. I perked up at this and I asked, "Do you mean the raising?" You looked at me and nodded. I looked at my hands; my thought was how do I tell them that knew what was in the box and had known since right after I had my first dream. By my demeanor he gathered that I knew what was in the box and was reluctant to tell him. So he asked me "Do you know what was in the box? Do you know what they raised?" I nodded; I had the attention of everyone in the office. Then I began, "What was in that box is going to be the hardest thing you have ever had to face. And what was in that box is only the beginning." He looked at me expectantly I took a deep breath and said in a voice barely a whisper that only he caught because of his enhanced hearing "Darla, Darla was in the box." I looked up at him sadly and he just stared at me in shock and then in disbelief. Cordelia was the one that broke the uncomfortable silence, "What?" she questioned me. Angel looked at her and then at me and said "That is impossible, I killed her and watcher her turn to dust." Then he addressed the others and said, "Darla was in the box"
The next questions came rather rapidly, they were addressed more to Angel than to me but I knew a lot of the answers. "Who's Darla?" came from someone and "How did she get out of hell?" came from someone else the last question was addressed to me from Angel "What is her mental state?" I kind of laughed at this. I also knew that he was afraid. I looked at him and said "You spent a few months there in this dimension and you were there hundreds of years. She has been gone for years, so I am guessing she has been in hell for thousands of years. Do you remember what you were like after you came back?" The look on his face let me know that he did know and he did remember. He then addressed the rest of office when he answered their questions and filled in the blanks. "Darla was my sire. I killed her to save Buffy after we met. When I came back from hell I couldn't even remember my own name, I was just going with my most basic instincts when Buffy found me. It took me a long time to recover." I looked at him with sadness in my eyes I hated that he had to endure so much pain. He continued "She is most likely insane and going to hunt me down as soon as she is able. She did teach Angelus everything he knew." A look of concern washed over his face then he addressed all of us "I want all of you to go, this is my fight and I don't want anyone to get hurt." I was the first to shake my head "No, I am not going to leave you to face her alone" Cordelia then stood up and agreed vehemently, as did Wesley and Gunn.
After much discussion and arguments he finally gave in to the fact that none of us were going anywhere. I was the first to point out that we had a window of opportunity here. She probably would not be up to her regular skills for at least a few months, if we could find her before then while she is still quite vulnerable then maybe we could take her out without any trouble. I also knew that the plan probably would not work. I had seen enough of such plans go horribly wrong, but it was still worth a shot.
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*