Nova The Marriage Consoler
Episode One
The show opens to Nova sitting at her desk at the castle of Cephiro.
"Hello, I'm Nova. Today we're going to talk with two couples, Fuu and Ferio, and Heero and Relena, and we'll see if I can help them with their problems! Or maybe they're just doomed. But hey, wouldn't that make a great show?!" Nova said excitedly.
Her producer bangs his head on the wall..... She wasn't supposed to say that!
They then cut to the opening credits, which are boring as all credits on help shows are.
Next we see Fuu and Ferio sitting down on a love seat facing Nova.
"So, Fuu, what's the issue you have with Ferio?" Nova said in a formal tone.
"Everything is going well. But I still can't seem to get over the Sarah thing. It keeps nagging at me." Fuu replied.
Nova sat pondering and then started drooling. Which made Fuu look scared.
"Oh! Sorry, I was thinking about eating a grilled chicken sandwich." Nova replied.
Fuu and Ferio sweat dropped.
"Ok, Ferio, what is your response to that?" Nova said as she whipped the drool on her black women's suit sleeve.
"Fuu, you know you always have been and always will be the only girl for me." Ferio said.
"You always say that!" Fuu cried.
Nova was eating popcorn and nodding as they spoke.
"C'mon Fuu, I was just helping her." Ferio said.
"But you didn't have to seem to interested in her!" Fuu said as her eyes filled with tears.
Nova took a sip of coffee from a cup on her desk. "BLEH!" She yelled as she spit it all out on the white carpet. "Forgot I hate coffee!"
Nova's producer continued his head banging.... There was now a rather nice dent in the wall....
"And now a word from our sponsor!" Nova said.
(Cuts to commercials)
"Buy."
(Commercials cut really short)
"See, I said a word! We're back!" Nova yelled.
"So, do you have any advice for us?" Ferio asked.
Nova stared blankly at him. "Was I supposed to give you advice?"
The people behind the set nod their head vigorously.
"Ohh! Ok!" Nova said. "Well then, simply kill Sarah, and all your problems will be gone!" Nova said as she clapped her hands.
"But Miss Sarah is already dead." Fuu replied.
Nova blinked. "Hmm, then kill Ferio!"
Fuu fell off the seat. "Dah! I can't do that!"
"But it's the best way to resolve stuff like this!" Nova said with a nod.
"But, but...." Fuu said as her lower lip trembled.
"I know it hurts." Nova said. "If ya want I can kill him for you!"
Ferio stood up. "Some help you are!"
He grabbed Fuu's arm and stomped off.
Nova smiled. "And now for a bunch of words from our
sponsors!"
The show returns and we see Relena and Heero on the love seat now.
"Well Heero and Relena, what issues do you have? Other than the fact that Relena's a stalker and Heero's a silent and grumpy guy?" Nova said.
Relena sniffed. "Heero won't talk to me!" She wined.
Nova nodded. "Well Heero, what do you have to say in reply to that."
Heero just glared at her.
"What? Didja have to stomp on his foot to get him to say I do?" Nova said as she rolled her eyes.
"The only thing he's said since the wedding is, 'I'm going to kill you.'" Relena said.
"OoOo!" Nova cried as she jumped up onto her desk. "He's perfect!"
Relena gave her the oddest look. "He wants to kill me!"
"That's what's so wonderful! It means he really loves you! 'Cause you can only be with the ones you love if you're dead!" Nova said as her eyes got all glittery.
"Heh," Heero snickered.
"Don't laugh at me boy!" Nova yelled.
"Well, do you think you can help us?" Relena asked.
"Well........ You could let him kill you!" Nova said. "Hmm nah....."
Relena sweat dropped.
"Don't count your chicken's before they hatch." Nova said with a solemn nod.
Relena looked confused.
"That should help. Plus try yelling really loudly. 'Cause maybe Heero can't hear you. Didja ever think of that?" Nova said.
"Thanks Nova, you're a life saver!" Relena said.
"Bleh I hate those candies." Nova said as she made a face.
(Ending credits roll)
To Learn more about Nova, visit this site: Playing With Fire
This story is dedicated to my friend NovaForever!!! and any other Nova fans, Nova rules!!!