Ends Justifying The Means

Ends Justifying The Means

Disclaimer: I don't own the song "Send Her My Love," Journey does. Kyle and Jan belong to LucasArts, everyone else probably belongs to me. Author's notes at the bottom. And yes, this is a third-person omnipresent style instead of Kyle's viewpoint. This story makes more sense that way. You'll see. Also, thank you soooo much to LadyCallie and Rina. You know who you are.

It's been so long

Since I've seen her face

You say she's doing fine

I still recall

A sad café

How it hurt so bad to see her cry

I didn't want to say goodbye…

Send her my love Memories remain

Send her my love Roses never fade

Send her my love

The same hotel, the same old room

I'm on the road again

She needed so much more

Than I could give

We knew our love could not pretend

Broken hearts can always mend…

Send her my love Memories remain

Send her my love Roses never fade

Send her my love

Callin' out her name I'm dreamin'

Reflections of a face I'm seein'

It's her voice

That keeps on haunting me

Send her, send her my love

Roses never fade

Memories remain

Send her, send her my love…

Kyle Katarn absently twirled his blaster on his shooting finger and wondered why all the misery in the galaxy seemed to accumulate onto him. He'd lost a mother, a father, a partner, a promising career in the Empire, friends on both sides of the war, and several mentors. But Jan and his father he missed the most, if missing someone more than anyone else was possible. He couldn't tell if Jan was still alive or not; logic told him the latter, his emotions the former. Sitting in the pilot's seat in the Crow, he felt traitorous. This is Jan's seat, something told him, and what are you doing in it? He propped his feet up on the console, just as Jan had done all the time, and holstered his sidearm. The reasons for him to have to leave the Fleet for some little backwater base were as clandestine as his former missions. Some bureaucrat probably decided that a depressed Jedi Knight was too unstable to have around and was a liability. But Jan and I served them well. Did they even give her a proper funeral? I didn't even get to attend, they cleared me out so quickly. They gave me the death pay and a condolence note and told me to be on my way. Shaking his head, he pulled his feet off the consol and went to make another pot of caf. My plan to save her couldn't and didn't work. This is going to be a long and painful jump.

On the Alliance hospital ship Liberation, two of the main guards were watching a cheesy old holovid that one had received from home and having a midnight snack. The vid was about a mutated, flesh-eating zombie and a stunning female warrior who was bound by fate to stop it. As a medical officer checked out and his relief checked in, one curious sentry asked why they had round-the-chrono duty in Room 285, all the while keeping his eye on the female lead in the vid. "Oh," the officer checking out said impassively, "we've got honor guard duty for a dead agent. Orders straight from Mon Mothma herself. This really important agent was killed after a firefight and brought here. Seems she and a partner were the ones who stole the Death Star plans from Danuta." The curious guard whistled appreciatively and lifted his drink. "Here's to her. What was her name?"

"Uh, Senior Staff Agent Jan Ors, or something like that. She sure doesn't look old enough to have stolen those plans." He shrugged. "Too bad, she was kinda cute too."

The medic watching Jan wasn't too alert when he took duty, it being 0130 hours Galactic Standard Time. About 0200 GST, when he had just begun to doze off, the supposedly dead woman stirred and sat up. When the guards heard the screams and ran in, they found a collapsed medic sentry and a very confused woman. Not knowing what else to do, the guards backed against the wall and called the commanding officer up at the hour. "Uh, sir? We've got a problem at 285. That dead agent, she's alive sir."

The CO came quickly.

Two days later, Jan was just allowed on her feet when a medical officer came to check her out and debrief her. "Now, Agent, what do you remember?"

"I was shot, and my partner Kyle brought me here."

"Uh, huh. Did you have a sum of money for your partner, should you die?"

"Of course. That's almost standard operating procedure in our division."

"Which is that?"

"Clandestine and Counter-Intelligence Ops." The medic wrote all this down on a slip of paper. "Did you ever think that your partner would kill you? For the money or not." Jan raised her eyebrows and shook her head slowly. "What is this, a survey? No. Not for a moment." She stopped and decided not to mention the Valley of the Jedi, when Kyle had an ignited lightsaber hanging immediately over her head. That would be unfair, since he was being taunted. "Kyle would never hurt me intentionally. He saved me many times from a death." The man snorted. "Yeah, except this time." He looked up at her face and apologized. "So, you've know the Captain for a long time?"

"He's a captain? This happen recently?"

"Yes, Agent. He was recently reassigned."

"And demoted, it seems. Kyle was a commander. Does this have anything to do with me?" He man stopped writing and threaded his pen through his writing pad. "I'm going to call in my CO for the rest of this debriefing."

"And this has something to do with me too? Am I being too hostile?" The medical officer didn't answer her. A few minutes later, an impatient looking commander walked in. "Agent Ors, I'm going to treat you like the heroine you are until you pull another stunt like you did with Yihhdl. Have you known Kyle Katarn for a sum of years?"

"Yes, sir." Jan tried not to let the disrespect seep through her voice. "Were you ever uncomfortable in his presence?"

Would I have wanted to marry him if I was? "No, sir."

"Good then. He's been formally reassigned to a base and was given the pay of 1500 credits that you set aside for your partner should you die in battle. We were concerned since this is a large sum of money, and Katarn is not what we would call one of our more… trustworthy agents like yourself. But if you have faith in him, then that is a different story."

"What was the situation sir? Were you thinking that Kyle killed me to get to the death pay?"

"It has happened in the past."

"Didn't you monitor his reactions?"

"He could have been acting." Jan shook her head. "No sir. He's been through much grief in his life; if an ordinary person like you or I tried to handle it, we'd collapse. He's a man of principles, and he has never shown me any reason to doubt his honor." The commander's lemon-face softened a bit. "Then we'll revoke the death charges."

"You've already drawn murder charges against him?!" The commander looked Jan over as though she was a beginner. "Agent Ors, you'll find that in life, the ends often justify the means. One can never be too careful when dealing with mercenaries." Yeah, with mercenaries like me and Kyle, you mean. "By the way Agent. You were somehow alive during the entire time. Vitals were extremely low, some kind of a healing coma you did subconsciously. No one knows how you did it. It's an unofficial miracle in the eyes of the medics." He left Jan to find her own way out. They wouldn't have done the same if the situation was reversed. They'd have gladly handed me that payoff and told me their deepest sorrows. Stumbling a bit, she exited the ward with an odd feeling that, instead of luck to be alive, was a wish she'd just stayed good and gone.

Kyle was unpacking in this new form of NR torture called Altyr V and pulled out the wad of bills from his pack. He didn't even want to look at the money. True, Jan would have wanted him to have it, but it felt wrong, like stealing from her. Noticing the note, he picked it up and decided to rest before his watch came on. The note, which he had taken to be a generic condolence note, was something else. It was somehow different than anything the NR could have given him. He unfolded the parchment and stopped breathing for what seemed an eternity. It was a note from Jan, dated about the time before the Valley missions. He took in the handwriting, the word choice, the overall writing style. It was definitely Jan's.

To Kyle,

If you are reading this, I am most likely fallen in battle. I don't and never would want you to mourn me. Know this however: I have always loved you and the man that you are and will be. You have stood by me for years and been my best friend and confidant. I only wish that I could be there with you as you read this and tell you that I am well. Take comfort in the small fact that someday we will be reunited. When you first met me, you came at a time when my life was, I was sure, going to end. I had lost my family and all my possessions to hired assassins, almost as we are now. When you and I met face to face, I felt a spark. By the look in your eyes, you felt it too. We "connected," so to speak. Since that moment, I have loved you. When we were in greatest peril (so far), I worried for you and you simply took it with a smile. That is one quality of yours that I wasn't sure if I wanted to strangle you or kiss you. If you can't tell already by my unusual gushing and girlish style, I am feeling emotions that I have never felt and that it is a sad duty of mine to write my own condolence note. As my father would have said, "bite the bolt and do your duty." I'm sorry I could have never told this to you in person, but I know that you have known. I know that the money must be cold comfort, but please accept it as a love offering. Until we meet again, I am

Your Jan.

Somehow the words reassured him. He folded the note back up and placed it in his wallet. I'm not going to forget you, Jan. I swear.

Jan was given the odd job of a crew chief for a fighter squadron. She had asked to be transferred to this "Altyr V," wherever it was. The CO denied the request, saying that she would serve no useful purpose. Jan argued that she could be Kyle's partner, but that request was shot down because Kyle was on a new mission that didn't call for an officer accompaniment. "We need to see how Captain Katarn does without your babysitting him, Ors." She had never felt angrier in her life, either at the barb or the man's lack of respect for the two agents who had quite possibly saved the galaxy from the Death Star destroying more planets. Not to mention the Dark Troopers. And the Seven Dark Jedi. And saving Crix Madine. And getting rid of Rom Mohc. She sighed heavily. However, after many battles with a tribunal, she resigned herself to the duty of head starshipwright for Defiance Squadron. Defiance was headed by both an older staffer and a young XO, Will Ralter. Ralter seemed slow on the uptake to Jan, who was used to Kyle's astute mind, but he was her CO no matter how badly she wanted to lob her spanner at him. Jan still wished she had Kyle with her, missed him terribly, but had an odd sense of rightness about being with Defiance. She didn't agree with her feelings a bit. I'll find you someday, Kyle. Even if it takes my entire life.

Finis.

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Hey, everyone!

Yeah, that was kinda sad. Not quite as angst-y as WA (I could probably replicate something like that again, but man, what was I doin'??). I added a couple of pieces of comic relief to break the emotions. (I have to brag about my writing :P) This is supposed to tell what happened between Jedi Knight and Mysteries of the Sith. The next sequel will be up sooner or later. I'm working on it now. It really depends on how many hits this one gets as to whether or not there will be a fourth. Should be up anywhere from 3rd week of March to the 4th week or even around the beginning of April. OK, I'm slow. Next story: obstacles revealed here will be solved or, at the least, challenged. It's comin'!!