Disclaimer: I do not own sailor moon…you know the rest…
AN: I was kinda' depressed when I wrote this. Plus I was kinda' stuck on Never Too Thin. WARNING: VERY disturbing subject this would have been rated R but I did not put as much cussing and graphic description as I would have.
~*~*~*~*
All I can hear is my breathing.
All I can feel is the razor cutting into my skin over and over!
I look up and smile.
My mother and father are trying to pull open the car door…
They cannot, I locked it.
They found out my secret
They found out about my cutting.
My mother had sent me to the doctor because I was looking sick.
The damn doctor wanted to do a full body check; she made me take off my clothes.
She quickly looked over my body, I held my breath
Please do not let her see them…Please do not let her see my cuts I begged.
However, how could she have missed them? They were right in front of her face.
I opened my eyes, she was writing something on her notebook. The look on her face said she did not see anything. But I knew.
I knew she had seen them.
I knew she had seen my precious cuts…
~*~*~*~
I started cutting myself after Darien dumped me…
I was running and crying, and then I fell.
When I sat up I saw that my arm was bleeding I could do nothing but stare, as the lovely red blood ran down my arm.
At did not fell anything! No pain.
I did feel the pain of the cut. But not the hurting in my heart, all my emotional pain was gone…and I loved it.
It was like a weird drug! I had to have more!
I had to keep hurting myself.
I started cutting and burning myself…the truth is…it was fun!
~*~*~*~
I knew the doctor had seen the cuts, but she didn't act like she did.
So, I had totally forgot about it.
But when I came home…mother was on the couch, father had his Arm around her.
"What's wrong?" I had asked.
Mother looked up, her eyes were red with tears, and she started crying again.
"Let me see your arms." My father demanded his voice strong, yet soft.
I back away.
"No…"
"Serena show me your cuts!"
He stood you, walked to me, grabbed my arms and pulled up my sleeves.
I tried to pull away and run, but he was too strong.
Anyway, it was too late…
He saw them.
He let me go, and a feel backwards.
"Why are you butchering your self like this?!"
"You wouldn't understand!" I yelled then I run to the garage, opened the car door, got in, and locked it.
My eyes fell on the cigarette lighter, a grin creped across my face. I pushed it in and waited.
I look out the window my mom and dad came up to it. Tried to open the door and failed, I just smiled.
POP!
I looked down at the lighter, which had popped back out, and I pull it out. It was red and burning with heat.
I smiled more.
I put the hot, red metal against my skin, and kissed.
"Shit…!"
That felt so good!
I could smell my burning flesh, but I did not care.
After a while, the lighter had cooled.
I looked back at my parents; there face had a horrified look. I just smiled.
I threw the lighter across the car.
I reached down and felt under the car seat. I took out the pocketknife I knew that my father had dropped a few days ago. However, I always 'forgot.'
I flipped it open and stared at it awhile.
Its sliver blade shinning just waiting to be used.
Well, it does not have to wait any longer.
I put the blade to my skin.
And I started to cut…
~*~*~
It has been a few days's since I went 'crazy.'
My dad was the one who got me out of the car; he broke on of the windows, unlocked the door, and got me out.
I am in rehab now. With some more cutters.
That is what we call ourselves, cutters, even if it is not proper.
Self-mutilator sounds so….evil.
Oh well.
~~*~*~*~*~
I hope you like this story…I am so weird huh? Please review.
AN: I was kinda' depressed when I wrote this. Plus I was kinda' stuck on Never Too Thin. WARNING: VERY disturbing subject this would have been rated R but I did not put as much cussing and graphic description as I would have.
~*~*~*~*
All I can hear is my breathing.
All I can feel is the razor cutting into my skin over and over!
I look up and smile.
My mother and father are trying to pull open the car door…
They cannot, I locked it.
They found out my secret
They found out about my cutting.
My mother had sent me to the doctor because I was looking sick.
The damn doctor wanted to do a full body check; she made me take off my clothes.
She quickly looked over my body, I held my breath
Please do not let her see them…Please do not let her see my cuts I begged.
However, how could she have missed them? They were right in front of her face.
I opened my eyes, she was writing something on her notebook. The look on her face said she did not see anything. But I knew.
I knew she had seen them.
I knew she had seen my precious cuts…
~*~*~*~
I started cutting myself after Darien dumped me…
I was running and crying, and then I fell.
When I sat up I saw that my arm was bleeding I could do nothing but stare, as the lovely red blood ran down my arm.
At did not fell anything! No pain.
I did feel the pain of the cut. But not the hurting in my heart, all my emotional pain was gone…and I loved it.
It was like a weird drug! I had to have more!
I had to keep hurting myself.
I started cutting and burning myself…the truth is…it was fun!
~*~*~*~
I knew the doctor had seen the cuts, but she didn't act like she did.
So, I had totally forgot about it.
But when I came home…mother was on the couch, father had his Arm around her.
"What's wrong?" I had asked.
Mother looked up, her eyes were red with tears, and she started crying again.
"Let me see your arms." My father demanded his voice strong, yet soft.
I back away.
"No…"
"Serena show me your cuts!"
He stood you, walked to me, grabbed my arms and pulled up my sleeves.
I tried to pull away and run, but he was too strong.
Anyway, it was too late…
He saw them.
He let me go, and a feel backwards.
"Why are you butchering your self like this?!"
"You wouldn't understand!" I yelled then I run to the garage, opened the car door, got in, and locked it.
My eyes fell on the cigarette lighter, a grin creped across my face. I pushed it in and waited.
I look out the window my mom and dad came up to it. Tried to open the door and failed, I just smiled.
POP!
I looked down at the lighter, which had popped back out, and I pull it out. It was red and burning with heat.
I smiled more.
I put the hot, red metal against my skin, and kissed.
"Shit…!"
That felt so good!
I could smell my burning flesh, but I did not care.
After a while, the lighter had cooled.
I looked back at my parents; there face had a horrified look. I just smiled.
I threw the lighter across the car.
I reached down and felt under the car seat. I took out the pocketknife I knew that my father had dropped a few days ago. However, I always 'forgot.'
I flipped it open and stared at it awhile.
Its sliver blade shinning just waiting to be used.
Well, it does not have to wait any longer.
I put the blade to my skin.
And I started to cut…
~*~*~
It has been a few days's since I went 'crazy.'
My dad was the one who got me out of the car; he broke on of the windows, unlocked the door, and got me out.
I am in rehab now. With some more cutters.
That is what we call ourselves, cutters, even if it is not proper.
Self-mutilator sounds so….evil.
Oh well.
~~*~*~*~*~
I hope you like this story…I am so weird huh? Please review.