Disclamier: I don't own the Higher Ground characters. But I do own Kaitlyn and Kyle etc.
A/N: Thanks for all the great reviews. They motivated me to get this part out tonight. I did this instead of my Humanities homework. So please tell me what you think of this part! I'd really like the 10 again J. Thanks!!
Part Twelve
The note fluttered to the floor as Shelby dropped it and ran out of the room. Scott followed her shouting.
"Shit!" Scott yelled to no one in particular. "What are we going to do?"
"We're going to find her before she does anything." Shelby said trying to remain clam as her mind raced with the possibilities.
"The woods!" she exclaimed suddenly. "That's where she went the fist time to escape. She'll go there again."
The two teenagers ran off into the woods as fast as they could. Knowing that every moment could be the difference between life and death.
Meanwhile Kaitlyn sat in a clearing in the woods. She watched the light flicker off the shiny blade of the razor. It was almost beautiful, the way the light seemed to play with the sliver of the edge of the object. Her face was void of any tears or any emotions at all. In her mind she was already dead and gone. Feeling this numbness was better than feeling the festering pain and anger and shame. She was beyond desperate now. Her worst nightmare was coming true, but she refused to let it happen. She would end it the only was she knew how. The slice of a blade cutting skin, releasing her.
Shelby felt time replaying itself as she looked at the tiny girl holding the razor above her wrist once again. She tried to remain clam as so not to startle the fragile teen. Unfortunately Scott wasn't in the same frame of mind. He just blew up at her.
"What the hell do you think your doing?" he yelled at Kaitlyn. The sudden noise in the silence of the forest made Kaitlyn jump suddenly and as she jumped the razor she had been toying with brushed against one of her wrists cutting it slightly.
"Leave me alone, Scott." She said in an expressionless voice. Her midnight colored hair obscuring her face from view. Shelby just stood back motionless, watching the scene play out.
"I don't know what happened to you Kait." He said in a disgusted tone.
Kaitlyn felt the flare of anger melt her icy veneer. She rose from her spot on the ground and turned to face Scott head on. Her eyes flashing she responded, "You what to know what happened, huh? Do you?"
"Yes!" he screamed back.
"I was raped!" she shouted to him. It was the first time she had said the words out loud. And the pain took her breath away.
Scott stood rooted in shock. Whatever he had expected her to say it wasn't this. He just kept shaking his head back and forth in denial. "But Kyle said…"
"Yeah well Kyle was the one who raped me." Seeing the disbelief written on his handsome face, "I knew you wouldn't believe me. God I hoped and I prayed that you would be my savoir…my angel. How wrong was I."
"I don't…I…don't understand." He stammered.
"What? You want all the gory details?" she asked him. All the hurt that was welling up inside her needing to come out, exploded in the explanation.
"It all started after you left. You moved and…and it was like I was missing part of myself. I didn't have any other close friends. And Kyle and I started hanging out together. I missed you so much and he was fun to be around at first. I know that you asked him to look out for me. So we started going out and for a while everything was great. Sure he was a little overprotective but I thought that was kinda sweet that he worried so much. But then he started getting really angry whenever I brought your name up. He kept saying, "Scott's gone now. I'm here. Why don't you pay some god damn attention to me?"
Finally I learned just not to bring you up at all cause it always caused a fight. And by that time somehow I had grown apart from the friends that I did have, so all I had was him. One night he got really drunk at some party. After the team won some big game. And I wasn't thinking and I said "Remember the game against Mifflin last year and how Scott caught that touchdown in the last seconds of the game to win it."
And he just got so angry and just hit me. Smacked me across my face. It split my lip. And he said that I should remember who's leading the team now. Well I was so mad and upset. I said that it was over.
But the next day he came over and apologized. He brought flowers for me and promised never to get that out of control again. And I believed him. You see, I tried to call you that night but you weren't home…again. So I thought well this is all I have I should try to make it work. But it only got worse.
It was after the big dance and Kyle said that he wanted to stop by his house before we went to the party. He told me that he had a surprise for me. And he took me up to his room. No one else was home. His parents were away for the weekend. I should have known better but I…I went upstairs with him. And we got into his room and he started kissing me. And we started making out. And I remember laughing asking if this was my surprise. He didn't say anything but just kinda smirked. And he kept putting his hands up my shirt. I kept pushing them back and telling him to knock it off, that it was time to go. And he just laughed and said not until he got what he came for. It was then that I could smell the alcohol on his breath. I realized that he was going to have sex with me weather I wanted to or not.
I began to struggle and he just held my wrists above my head. He ripped my dress down the front. I was so scared and I was screaming. He just hit me. And he said that I just needed a 'real' man. He took off his clothes and as he pulled his belt off he decided that I needed to be taught a lesson for fighting back.
That's how I got the marks on my back. He just kept hitting me and hitting me with the belt, with his fists. So much pain. I tried to fight back but then everything just hurt and I just I don't know. It was like I retreated into myself. I didn't want to think about what was happening to me. And when he saw that I had stopped fighting. He pushed my legs apart and he…entered me. And it hurt so badly. It felt like someone was tearing me apart. He was real surprised that I was a virgin. He laughed and said "Look's like I finally beat Scott to something."
He left to take a shower and I escaped then. I'm not sure how I got home. It's all a blur. And I got home and my Dad saw me. Beaten, bloody, and bruised. And you know what he said to me? He said, "You probably deserved it."
I went upstairs and think I must have took at least 3 showers that night. I felt so dirty. And I just curled up in my bed and tried to sleep. I was numb. I didn't even cry until days later.
When I got back to school on Monday everyone was talking about me, the resident whore. Cause according to Kyle I had slept with practically the whole football team. And I was a tease and a slut and everyone believed him. He was the fucking golden boy of the town. I couldn't take the rumors and the glares and the whispers every time I passed someone in the halls. So I decided to call the one person on this earth I thought would believe me no matter what.
I called you Scott. And that's when you called me all those names the first time. And I got off the phone with you and I went to the medicine cabinet and got the bottle of tranquilizers. I took the whole bottle and went to bed. But the maid found me and rushed me to the hospital where they pumped my stomach. When my father came to see me he said, "You can't even commit suicide right."
He had his private doctor take over so they wouldn't ask about the scars and bruises on the inside of my legs. I saw a round of shrinks and I just waited until I could try and succeed. I finally managed to get the razors but they found me in time and sewed me back up. And I got shipped off here. Every night reliving that night sometimes it gets mixed in with the car crash.
And now Kyle's is coming here. And I get sick to my stomach thinking about him. And some part of my mind says that maybe I deserved what happened to me. That I was bad or a tease. That because I let my mom die I deserved to be raped and beaten.
I'm tired of thinking and feeling. And most of all I'm tired of being alone. So it ends here."
Scott had tears streaming down his face. He could barely breath. He didn't want to believe it. He didn't want it to be true. But he knew it was. This all had happened to her. His pixie girl. A girl he loved like a sister.
"You're not alone. I'm here. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. You can't leave me. I need you. Please don't leave me. I love you." He pleaded.
It was just too much for Kaitlyn. All her defenses came crashing down and she fell to the ground sobbing. Scott went to her and cradled her in his arms crying with her, for her. Shelby wiped the tears she had shed at the other girls tangible pain and left to get Peter and Sophie.