Buffy was laying on the cool grass, her head resting gently on the blond vampire's bare chest. They had been laying there for what seemed like ages, just looking up into the sky. The warm sunshine streamed down, breaking though the clouds that rolled rapidly above them. Although she couldn't hear the familiar sound of a beating heart, she could feel the slight vibrations of the steady purr the vampire was creating.
She wished that the moment would last forever, but like every wish, she knew that it couldn't last. Soon it would be time for them to go back, back to the reality she called life. Somehow, she was afraid of it, going back. Everything would go back to how it was: painful, blemished, uncertain. Here, everything was clear. She didn't have to worry what others thought. She didn't have to worry about others' lives being endangered. There would never be any doubt in her mind of how she felt. Being here had completely erased any fear of allowing her to admit to herself that she loved Spike.
Yes, she had said it, she loved Spike. Of course she hadn't actually told him yet. It was too soon. She had no idea how she was going to say it. What if she said it first and then he said it just because she had? What if he did but he didn't believe her because of what had happened between them? What if she admitted her feelings, but he didn't feel the same way? Can a vampire without a soul ever really love? Yet he had loved Drusilla, hadn't he? Worse yet, what if he still loved her?
"I mus' say, you look delicious in sunlight, luv."
Buffy raised her head to look into the pair of cool blue eyes staring down at her. Then it all came rushing back to her. He was still a vampire. He had killed hundreds of people and felt no remorse. He had tried to hurt her family and friends, yet here she was. It was, wrong.
................................................................
Had he said something wrong? Spike was confused when Buffy lifted herself off of him.
"What are we doing, Spike?" She whispered the words softly, puzzlement written all over her face.
"Something I though' we both wanted." Where was she going with this? Was she beginning to have doubts? Did he do something wrong?
"I did, I do, but...,"
"Pet, I know wha' this is abou'," Spike responded, bringing his hand to her face and holding it gently. "You're worried abou' when we go back, aren't you? Wha' your mum and pals 'll think?"
Buffy lowered her eyes away from his steady gaze.
"It's not just what they will think, but what will we think?" She looked back up with fear in her eyes. "How do we know that we will remember what went on when we wake up? How do we know that we will feel the same way? So many questions have been running through my head and I don't know where to begin answering them. And Giles...if he knew..."
"Yeah, I can imagine it now...'Buffy wha' did you think you were doing? He's a soulless vampire, who knows how many people he has already killed so far and you le' im get tha' close to you?'" In response to the vacant look she gave him, Spike added, "That's the real problem, isn't it, luv? Is that 'ow you see me?"
"I wish that I could say I didn't, but the Slayer in me won't allow it. I have let it slip my mind a lot lately, but the reality of it is still there. It's what you are and neither of us can change it. I'm the Slayer, and I'm supposed to kill vampires, not be with them."
"Since when 'ave you done what the slayer is supposed to do, besides the obvious stakings? If you 'ad done what every good li'l slayer was supposed to do, you would probably be dead by now. That's what makes you different from them, Buffy. You make your own rules. I mentioned once tha' having family and friends was something unexpected, because they aren't something other slayers 'ad. The Slayer separated 'erself from them because she either didn't have any, she didn't 'ave time for 'em, or she didn't want them to be 'urt. But you changed that. They've 'elped you so much. If not for them, I may 'ave already killed you by now." He smirked as her hazel eyes gazed back at him. "And that would 'ave been a shame, eh?"
Buffy smiled slightly as he continued, "So, you see, the normal rules don't always apply when it comes to you. Things 'ave a way of working out, you'll see. Now stop 'aving those nasty li'l thoughts running through that pretty head of yours. We'll 'ave plenty of time to figure out where to go, you know, cross that bridge when we come to i'."
He ran his fingers through her golden hair and seemed to be fascinated by the feel of it. He pulled her back down towards him, bringing her face within inches of his own.
"In case you haven't noticed, lately, I seem to 'ave been ignoring the rules too," he whispered as he moved into a kiss.
"It is time," a light voice sang from behind them.
The two naked lovers turned to look at the fairy who had suddenly appeared. Spike groaned as he began to sit up.
"Did you 'ave to interrupt, we were 'aving a moment 'ere."
"I'm sorry, but it is time," Crea repeated, looking intently at them. "Come."
Spike was the first to get up and began to help Buffy to her feet.
"I suppose it will be you two who need the clothes this time?" Crea commented, remembering the customs. She waved her hands towards them and the clothing they had worn earlier instantly covered their bodies.
"As I have said, why can't I do that in real life?" Buffy remarked.
"Because then I wouldn't get to see you get changed the old-fashioned way," Spike stated, grinning at her mischievously. Buffy responded by punching him playfully in the arm which earned a wise smile from the fairy. She had been right. Spending some time alone together had opened their feelings for each other. Feelings that both of them had been too afraid to admit to until now.
"Well, as much as I would 'ave loved to stay 'ere all day, I suppose you 'ave people to save, namely me. Not that I like the idea very much. I much prefer taking that role myself. I don't like being weak and...well...downrigh' helpless. Is there anything you can do abou' that?" Spike asked, turning to a thoughtful Crea.
"I'm afraid not. Only when the creature is destroyed will you go back to as you were," she replied. "Now, you must hurry up and say your goodbyes. We mustn't be too long."
"Wait, what goodbye," Buffy asked, surprised. "Won't we see each other as soon as we wake up?"
"I'm afraid not," she responded. "Spike will not be able to go with you and he is still very, very weak right now."
"Thanks for the reminder," he commented, sounding very annoyed with the fact.
"It is best that you remain in here until the Slayer defeats her."
"I can't just le'er go out there all alone. I want to be there. I 'ave to be there."
"Spike, I've already learned that we should trust her about things like this." She put her hand up to his face and rubbed her thumb against his smooth skin. She pulled her body closer to him as he wrapped his arms around her waist. She smiled sweetly. "I will see you soon, I promise. We'll have you back to your old sexy self in no time."
She moved to kiss him but he backed away slightly, giving her a curious look.
"You think I am sexy?" He asked seriously. "Just 'ow long 'ave you been thinking about that, exactly?"
"That's something you may never know."
"You li'l tease," he growled as he brought his mouth upon hers.
"We must go now," Crea repeated, growing a little impatient.
"Okay," Buffy conceded, breaking the kiss. "Soon." She told Spike as she wrapped her arms around his neck in a final hug goodbye. He held her tightly, as if it were for the last time. He had this feeling...no, it was nothing.
"Buffy," he started to whisper in her ear. "I..."
................................................................
His voice was cut off as Buffy opened her eyes in the darkened room. As she started to sit up, she noticed that the blinds had been carefully drawn and glanced at the clock by her bed. It read 7:30. She looked back down at the sleeping figure next to her. He was drastically different from how she had just seen him, but her heart couldn't see him as anyone but the same person. That showed how much things had changed between them. He was no longer just a vampire to her, he was a person. Not just any person, but one she loved.
He still laid in the same position she had first seen him in, although now his head was turned towards where she had been sleeping. His skeletal body was motionless, giving the appearance of a corpse. She would defeat this thing. She had to.
'You do love him, don't you?' A voice whispered in her head.
Buffy had almost forgotten the fairy was there. She looked up at the again-small creature sitting on her dresser and gave a small half smile.
"Is it that obvious, besides the incident in the dream?"
'In the dreamworld your heart and mind are opened up to things that are sometimes never admitted in the outside world. When I first saw the two of you fight, I thought that there was something about both of you. I couldn't place what it was, but there was something. Perhaps it was the same thing that drew me to this town in the first place. I saw how he looked at you, watched you, and how you looked at him. I have the feeling that things were not always this way, but never-the-less they are now.'
Crea observed how the young woman had picked up the vampire's hand and was entwining it in her own, her eyes never leaving his face.
'Have you told him how you feel?'
Buffy shook her head slowly.
"I didn't know how," she looked back at the fairy. "And I'm afraid. I...I have a long his history of boyfriends leaving me. Okay, well maybe it's not very long, but it tends to happen with all of them so far."
Looking back at Spike, she added, "a...and what if he doesn't feel the same way. Can he really love me even without a soul? That would go against everything I have ever known. I fell in love with a vampire once before, but he had a soul. He had an..." she smirked. "An excuse for loving me."
'You can't let your fears control you. Also you should not compare him with any other vampire, for I have never seen another vampire quite like him. Of course I cannot say that I have seen many, but I do know this: He loves you. I have no doubt about that. It is not impossible to believe. There have been tales of vampires falling in love with mortals before, however, falling for the slayer is not very common. I also do not believe that he has any excuse for loving you, it just is.'
He loved her? That knowledge erased any doubts Buffy had about accepting her feelings. She could think of nothing else except that she wanted him to wake up and be back to normal. She wanted to tell him what she was thinking, what she was feeling. But she had to wait for now.
She leaned down and kissed him lightly on his cheek. "Soon," she whispered softly before she sat back up.
"I suppose I should get changed before going to fight whatever this old lady is. Wouldn't want her to see me looking less than spectacular while I kick her ass. I think a shower is in order too..." She moved from the bed and made her way to the closet to look for another change of clothes.
'I will go down and tell the others you are awake.' Crea said as she fluttered up and towards the door.
"Wait, is everyone still down there?" The blond woman asked, peeking around the closet door.
'Yes,' the fairy replied pausing for a moment. 'They have been checking on you regularly. You are very lucky to have such a caring family.'
"Yeah," Buffy said, smiling in her own thoughts. "They're really great. Always keeping me in line. They've been with me through a lot."
'Just as you were for them.' Crea started back out the door. 'Try not to take very long. This must be done tonight.'
...................................................................
The old woman sauntered over to where her small parcel of items was laid on the lone table.
How dare that little creature interrupt something she had been doing for thousands of years. Because the process had not been completed, she would have to find a new donor very shortly. Not that it would be hard, but it was more trouble than she had wanted. However, an ancient fairy or a slayer would make a nice contribution.
She pulled a small dagger from the parcel.
But just in case she couldn't get them to cooperate, she would be ready.
The metal gleamed as she held it up to her eye length.
Yes, she would be ready.
She wished that the moment would last forever, but like every wish, she knew that it couldn't last. Soon it would be time for them to go back, back to the reality she called life. Somehow, she was afraid of it, going back. Everything would go back to how it was: painful, blemished, uncertain. Here, everything was clear. She didn't have to worry what others thought. She didn't have to worry about others' lives being endangered. There would never be any doubt in her mind of how she felt. Being here had completely erased any fear of allowing her to admit to herself that she loved Spike.
Yes, she had said it, she loved Spike. Of course she hadn't actually told him yet. It was too soon. She had no idea how she was going to say it. What if she said it first and then he said it just because she had? What if he did but he didn't believe her because of what had happened between them? What if she admitted her feelings, but he didn't feel the same way? Can a vampire without a soul ever really love? Yet he had loved Drusilla, hadn't he? Worse yet, what if he still loved her?
"I mus' say, you look delicious in sunlight, luv."
Buffy raised her head to look into the pair of cool blue eyes staring down at her. Then it all came rushing back to her. He was still a vampire. He had killed hundreds of people and felt no remorse. He had tried to hurt her family and friends, yet here she was. It was, wrong.
................................................................
Had he said something wrong? Spike was confused when Buffy lifted herself off of him.
"What are we doing, Spike?" She whispered the words softly, puzzlement written all over her face.
"Something I though' we both wanted." Where was she going with this? Was she beginning to have doubts? Did he do something wrong?
"I did, I do, but...,"
"Pet, I know wha' this is abou'," Spike responded, bringing his hand to her face and holding it gently. "You're worried abou' when we go back, aren't you? Wha' your mum and pals 'll think?"
Buffy lowered her eyes away from his steady gaze.
"It's not just what they will think, but what will we think?" She looked back up with fear in her eyes. "How do we know that we will remember what went on when we wake up? How do we know that we will feel the same way? So many questions have been running through my head and I don't know where to begin answering them. And Giles...if he knew..."
"Yeah, I can imagine it now...'Buffy wha' did you think you were doing? He's a soulless vampire, who knows how many people he has already killed so far and you le' im get tha' close to you?'" In response to the vacant look she gave him, Spike added, "That's the real problem, isn't it, luv? Is that 'ow you see me?"
"I wish that I could say I didn't, but the Slayer in me won't allow it. I have let it slip my mind a lot lately, but the reality of it is still there. It's what you are and neither of us can change it. I'm the Slayer, and I'm supposed to kill vampires, not be with them."
"Since when 'ave you done what the slayer is supposed to do, besides the obvious stakings? If you 'ad done what every good li'l slayer was supposed to do, you would probably be dead by now. That's what makes you different from them, Buffy. You make your own rules. I mentioned once tha' having family and friends was something unexpected, because they aren't something other slayers 'ad. The Slayer separated 'erself from them because she either didn't have any, she didn't 'ave time for 'em, or she didn't want them to be 'urt. But you changed that. They've 'elped you so much. If not for them, I may 'ave already killed you by now." He smirked as her hazel eyes gazed back at him. "And that would 'ave been a shame, eh?"
Buffy smiled slightly as he continued, "So, you see, the normal rules don't always apply when it comes to you. Things 'ave a way of working out, you'll see. Now stop 'aving those nasty li'l thoughts running through that pretty head of yours. We'll 'ave plenty of time to figure out where to go, you know, cross that bridge when we come to i'."
He ran his fingers through her golden hair and seemed to be fascinated by the feel of it. He pulled her back down towards him, bringing her face within inches of his own.
"In case you haven't noticed, lately, I seem to 'ave been ignoring the rules too," he whispered as he moved into a kiss.
"It is time," a light voice sang from behind them.
The two naked lovers turned to look at the fairy who had suddenly appeared. Spike groaned as he began to sit up.
"Did you 'ave to interrupt, we were 'aving a moment 'ere."
"I'm sorry, but it is time," Crea repeated, looking intently at them. "Come."
Spike was the first to get up and began to help Buffy to her feet.
"I suppose it will be you two who need the clothes this time?" Crea commented, remembering the customs. She waved her hands towards them and the clothing they had worn earlier instantly covered their bodies.
"As I have said, why can't I do that in real life?" Buffy remarked.
"Because then I wouldn't get to see you get changed the old-fashioned way," Spike stated, grinning at her mischievously. Buffy responded by punching him playfully in the arm which earned a wise smile from the fairy. She had been right. Spending some time alone together had opened their feelings for each other. Feelings that both of them had been too afraid to admit to until now.
"Well, as much as I would 'ave loved to stay 'ere all day, I suppose you 'ave people to save, namely me. Not that I like the idea very much. I much prefer taking that role myself. I don't like being weak and...well...downrigh' helpless. Is there anything you can do abou' that?" Spike asked, turning to a thoughtful Crea.
"I'm afraid not. Only when the creature is destroyed will you go back to as you were," she replied. "Now, you must hurry up and say your goodbyes. We mustn't be too long."
"Wait, what goodbye," Buffy asked, surprised. "Won't we see each other as soon as we wake up?"
"I'm afraid not," she responded. "Spike will not be able to go with you and he is still very, very weak right now."
"Thanks for the reminder," he commented, sounding very annoyed with the fact.
"It is best that you remain in here until the Slayer defeats her."
"I can't just le'er go out there all alone. I want to be there. I 'ave to be there."
"Spike, I've already learned that we should trust her about things like this." She put her hand up to his face and rubbed her thumb against his smooth skin. She pulled her body closer to him as he wrapped his arms around her waist. She smiled sweetly. "I will see you soon, I promise. We'll have you back to your old sexy self in no time."
She moved to kiss him but he backed away slightly, giving her a curious look.
"You think I am sexy?" He asked seriously. "Just 'ow long 'ave you been thinking about that, exactly?"
"That's something you may never know."
"You li'l tease," he growled as he brought his mouth upon hers.
"We must go now," Crea repeated, growing a little impatient.
"Okay," Buffy conceded, breaking the kiss. "Soon." She told Spike as she wrapped her arms around his neck in a final hug goodbye. He held her tightly, as if it were for the last time. He had this feeling...no, it was nothing.
"Buffy," he started to whisper in her ear. "I..."
................................................................
His voice was cut off as Buffy opened her eyes in the darkened room. As she started to sit up, she noticed that the blinds had been carefully drawn and glanced at the clock by her bed. It read 7:30. She looked back down at the sleeping figure next to her. He was drastically different from how she had just seen him, but her heart couldn't see him as anyone but the same person. That showed how much things had changed between them. He was no longer just a vampire to her, he was a person. Not just any person, but one she loved.
He still laid in the same position she had first seen him in, although now his head was turned towards where she had been sleeping. His skeletal body was motionless, giving the appearance of a corpse. She would defeat this thing. She had to.
'You do love him, don't you?' A voice whispered in her head.
Buffy had almost forgotten the fairy was there. She looked up at the again-small creature sitting on her dresser and gave a small half smile.
"Is it that obvious, besides the incident in the dream?"
'In the dreamworld your heart and mind are opened up to things that are sometimes never admitted in the outside world. When I first saw the two of you fight, I thought that there was something about both of you. I couldn't place what it was, but there was something. Perhaps it was the same thing that drew me to this town in the first place. I saw how he looked at you, watched you, and how you looked at him. I have the feeling that things were not always this way, but never-the-less they are now.'
Crea observed how the young woman had picked up the vampire's hand and was entwining it in her own, her eyes never leaving his face.
'Have you told him how you feel?'
Buffy shook her head slowly.
"I didn't know how," she looked back at the fairy. "And I'm afraid. I...I have a long his history of boyfriends leaving me. Okay, well maybe it's not very long, but it tends to happen with all of them so far."
Looking back at Spike, she added, "a...and what if he doesn't feel the same way. Can he really love me even without a soul? That would go against everything I have ever known. I fell in love with a vampire once before, but he had a soul. He had an..." she smirked. "An excuse for loving me."
'You can't let your fears control you. Also you should not compare him with any other vampire, for I have never seen another vampire quite like him. Of course I cannot say that I have seen many, but I do know this: He loves you. I have no doubt about that. It is not impossible to believe. There have been tales of vampires falling in love with mortals before, however, falling for the slayer is not very common. I also do not believe that he has any excuse for loving you, it just is.'
He loved her? That knowledge erased any doubts Buffy had about accepting her feelings. She could think of nothing else except that she wanted him to wake up and be back to normal. She wanted to tell him what she was thinking, what she was feeling. But she had to wait for now.
She leaned down and kissed him lightly on his cheek. "Soon," she whispered softly before she sat back up.
"I suppose I should get changed before going to fight whatever this old lady is. Wouldn't want her to see me looking less than spectacular while I kick her ass. I think a shower is in order too..." She moved from the bed and made her way to the closet to look for another change of clothes.
'I will go down and tell the others you are awake.' Crea said as she fluttered up and towards the door.
"Wait, is everyone still down there?" The blond woman asked, peeking around the closet door.
'Yes,' the fairy replied pausing for a moment. 'They have been checking on you regularly. You are very lucky to have such a caring family.'
"Yeah," Buffy said, smiling in her own thoughts. "They're really great. Always keeping me in line. They've been with me through a lot."
'Just as you were for them.' Crea started back out the door. 'Try not to take very long. This must be done tonight.'
...................................................................
The old woman sauntered over to where her small parcel of items was laid on the lone table.
How dare that little creature interrupt something she had been doing for thousands of years. Because the process had not been completed, she would have to find a new donor very shortly. Not that it would be hard, but it was more trouble than she had wanted. However, an ancient fairy or a slayer would make a nice contribution.
She pulled a small dagger from the parcel.
But just in case she couldn't get them to cooperate, she would be ready.
The metal gleamed as she held it up to her eye length.
Yes, she would be ready.