Shinigami! Episode 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Duo or Freakazoid! Duo and all other Gundam Wing characters belong to Bandi, Freakazoid is property of Steven Spielberg. Please do not change or copy this with out my permission.

Author's notes: Feeling inspired by the Shinigami Theme song, I've decided to make episodes!! I know it's pathetic, but remember, it's only a fic! Got your hot beverage? Sitting in a comfy chair? Slippers? Fez? Bubble pipe? Good, now enjoy, and remember, no flames.

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[Opening: Five Day Forecast]

Close up of Duo's face, everything is dark and gloomy, shadows dance across Duo's face.

Duo: " The calm, the calm. Then darkness gathers, you hear a sound. then it happens! Rain in trenchal down pours! Snow, Sleet, Wind, Thunder, Lighting, Hail, Hurricanes, Tsunamis, Tornados, Smog!!! AAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!"

The back ground and Duo spin chaotically, then the back ground changes to a typical news show weather map and Duo pulls out a pointer stick.

Duo: "…Giving away to plenty of sunshine for the rest of the day, the five day forecast when we return!"

[Shinigami Theme Song]

[Act I: Dance of Doom!]

It's a quiet evening, nothing stirring on the streets until the front doors of the Last National Bank burst open and a large Neanderthal with blue-purple skin leaps out amid the wreckage and alarms. He runs down the street and rips out a lamp post and swats a police car that was responding to the break in ,away. He grins nastily.

Announcer: " Terror Grips the city. Terror that wears a loincloth. His name is Ronald Royce, but police in 12 states and 3 colonies know him as 'Cave Guy.' He's Brutally strong, but also, highly intelligent."

Cave Guy: "I subscribe to the New Yorker. * laughs snootily*"

Announcer: "Only one man can stop this madman's reign of terror! That man…"

Camera pans up the top of a building where the silhouettes of Batman and a crook in a trenchcoat are fighting.

Announcer: "…belongs to another network."

The silhouettes turn in the announcer's direction and glare.

Announcer: "So we have to turn to this guy."

Scene changes to a sleepy suburban home, more specifically in the upstairs bedroom of Max Maxwell. He basically looks like Duo with out his braid with wire framed glasses, and wearing shorts, a tee-shirt, and flannel shirt.

Announcer: " A nerd computer ace? Or is he?"

Mrs. Maxwell: " Max, hon? Where are you?"

Max: "In here, mom."

Ms. Maxwell steps into his room. She looks like a typical 50's sitcom type mom with a sickingly sweet smile on her face.

Mrs. Maxwell: " What cha up to?"

Max( dully): "Just figuring out my retirement plan."

Mrs. M.: " You shouldn't work so hard! Maybe do something fun? Isn't there a dance tonight?"

Max's eyebrows arch as he has a flash back to earlier that week.

Hilde: "Sorry, Max, but I've got to wash my hair, or help the needy….I forget which."

Lita: " No can do Max. That's the night I'm uh, havin' somethin' removed!"

Rye: "Sure, Max I'd love to go to the dance with you….If I were ugly and dead!"

Flashback ends and Max slumps.

Max(depressed): "I don't wanna go."

Mrs. M: "You spend far too much time on that computer."

Max(monotone): "It's my life."

Mrs. Maxwell(still smiling): "That's so very, very sad."

Announcer: "Meanwhile, frantic police launch a desperate search for Cave Guy, using all the tools of modern law enforcement, including lots of overtime."

Cave Guy ducks breathlessly into a parking lot. He barely misses being spotted by a chopper.

Cave Guy( to himself.): "Tch. How I can I escape to my hide out in the Hamptons with all this heat?"

He then notices his surroundings. A highschool full of happy teens dancing, eating and doing stupid dares. A Banner Proclaims: Day Light Savings Dance. The wanted man gives an delighted grin.

Cave Guy: "Perhaps a hostage or 20 would help."

Announcer: "Wilt Chamblerin High. There innocent students enjoy a spirited dance to celebrate Daylight Savings Time."

Student #1: "Daylight Savings Time rules!"

Student #2: "It's rockin',man!

Announcer: "Little do they know that their little party will turn into….A Hop from Hades! A Prom from Purgatory, A….DANCE of DOOM!(people shriek in the background.) We will return to…DANCE of DOOM after these messages."

[Commercials]

Announcer: "We now return you to Dance of Doom."

The Maxwell home.

Max walks down stairs and sees his parents watching 3rd Rock from the Sun.

Max: 'Are there any pizza rolls left?"

Mr. Maxwell: "Nope, your mother ate them, all 27."

Mrs. Maxwell: 'So I was little peckish. I could make more."

Just as he's about reply, the TV scene changes to the outside of Max's school.

Announcer: "This just in! Students at Wilt Chamberlain High are being held hostage!"

Max: "Wilt Chamberlain High?! That's my school!"

Mrs. M: "Well it's good think you couldn't find a date!"

Mr. M: "Yeah, your lucky your always glued to a computer screen."

Max glares and runs in to the hall way.

Max: "Oh…FREAK OUT!"

(Author's note: Yeah, it's the same as Freakazoid, it's one thing I couldn't change with out being awkward later on.)

Max's body turns into a whirl wind and out pops Duo. He looks the same as always, except that his shirt has S! on it.

Duo: "Hello! I'm in the fic!!!"

Duo turns into a lighting bolt with his head upon it as he's running and speed out the door, his parents completely obvious.

Mr. Maxwell: "Hey, where'd he go?"

Mrs. Maxwell: "Aw, and I was going to make Sloppy Joes."

Heero Yuy is parked on the side of the street only a mile away from the school. He's leaning angst his gundaniam police car and checking his watch. Duo to stops right beside him.

Duo: "Nothing will stand in the way of my duty!"

Heero: "Hey, Duo. Wanna go get a mint?"

Duo: "DO I ?!!"

He and Heero hop in the car and drive in the opposite direction. Scene changes to the outside of a convience store building with a sign that says "Make Mine A Mint." The two pilots lounge angst Heero's car.

Duo(contentedly): "I must say, that was one fine mint."

Heero: "Yeah. Say, Cave guys holdin' some kids hostage down at your school. I'd go take care of that."

Duo: "That's right! I almost forgot! To the Hop!"

Duo zips off.

Announcer: "Will Shinigami make it in time? And what of this strange fellow?"

A little man in a gray cloak and floppy black hat slide across the screen with a wide grin his face, his hand is obscuring something in his hand with a black cloth.

Announcer: " And what of the object he clutches so preciously?"

He pulls back his and to revile a pocket watch.

Announcer: "An ordinary pocket watch? No, for you see it has a strange power…"

The little man comes up the window of a pet shop. In side are a pair of lemurs playing. They lock up as he approaches the glass and dramatically pulls out the watch and aims it. Purple waves emit from it and hit the lemurs. The watch stops and the pale fellow shakes it up and down hard before it starts up again and transforms the lemurs into a familiar metal. He cackles insanely.

Announcer: "…the power to turn lemurs into gundanium.What role will he play in today events? Why was there a mint scene? Do you know the Muffin Man? All this and more when Sinigami returns!"

[ Commercials ]

Out side WCHS the police wait tensely for Cave Guy's Demands. As a spot light passes the window, the villain can be seen, glaring out at them. Meanwhile Hilde and Rye are in a huddle.

Rye: "Go talk to him! Your on the Student Council!"

Hilde: "But you get along better with older guys."

Rye: "What's that supposed to mean?!"

Cave Guy is still watching the police movements when Rye shoves Hilde forward.

Hilde: "Um, excuse me? Do you know how long this is going to take? Some of us have reservations for a late dinner at the Green Gourd."

Cave Guy: "Oh I've dinned at the Green Gourd before. Your better off as hostages."

Hilde: "Your very well versed for a…..Primordial American."

Cave Guy(leaning forward): "Your too kind. ROOOOOOOAAAAAAAAARRR!!!!!!!"

He grabs Hilde but then Duo bursts through the window and knock him to the ground then walks up to Hilde.

Duo(accusingly): "Hilde, you fibbed to Max about washing you hair. If this where an after-school special, ooh, you'd pay a bitter-sweet price for you little deceit, like getting big oily zits, or-or eating of the same plate as David Lee Roth! Ewwww! You-and he-eating off the same plate!Ooh! I'm so angry! I'm gonna go talk to Lita!"

Duo stomps off, but is rushed by Cave Guy. The Braided Baka steeps aside and sticks out his foot.

Duo: "Have a nice trip, see ya next Fall!"

Cave Guy crashes to the ground and Duo speed-sidesteps over to Lita.

Duo: "Hi, Mom! Hey, Lita, I heard you having something removed, perhaps that something was…YOUR HEART!!!! Just kiddin'. It was probably something gross like a wart."

Cave Guy tries to attack Duo again, this time Duo ducks and crawls through his legs.

Duo(singing): "Low Bridge everybody down! Low Bridge, Cave Guy's under ware is brown! Looks like he has the pooties, ooties!" (directs the crowd) "Everybody Down! Simmer down, quite down. Sssh. Everybody on this side Ssssh ssssh ssssh. Slow down, calm down. Everybody down!"

Duo comes up to Rye.

Duo: "And Rye, you…"

Rye turns around smile seductively at him. Duo's mouth hangs open and then he gets a dreamy look in his eyes.

Duo: "Skip it."

Cave Guy attacks again, barely missing Duo. The run around the gym until Duo leaps upon basketball hoop and scrambles up. Cave Guy begins to pull it down.

Cave Guy: "Your little urban jokes won't save you now, Shinigami. I'll ground you to powder!"

Duo: "I love you."

Cave Guy(dumbfounded) ":….Oh, my."

Duo: "Not 'cause your Cave guy, no. Because you fall in with the whole bird ,dolphin, tree thing."

Cave Guy: "That's kind of touching in a vapid and pointless way."

They both tug on the backboard for another minute before Duo simply lets it go. It flattens Cave Guy.

Duo: "Okay, you win!"

Minutes Latter the villain is being carted away, while Lita shakes Duo's hand.

Lita: "Nice job back there."

Duo: 'Thanks, say do you think this out fit makes me look fat? I could always sign up for lyposuctioning!"

Duo sticks his thumb in his much and sucks until he's twig thin, then lets go and expands and contacts back to his normal shape and smiles idiotically. Lita and Hilde walks by him.

Lita: "Stupid."

Hilde: "Call me later!"

Duo: "Hey Hilde! Hildelioni! HEY HILDE!!"

Off screen voice: "Psst!"

The same little guy form earlier walks up and stands on his tip toes.

Little Man: "Want to see something strange and mystical?

Duo: "NO!! GET OUT OF HERE WITH THAT WATCH! LAY OFF THE POOR LEMURS, WILL YA?! SHEESH! YOU'RE A CREEP! GO AWAY! WE WERE HAVING A GOOD TIME 'TILL YOU SHOWED UP, JEEPERS! OOOOH! GO HAVE SOME COFFEE WITH CREAM! OR SOMETHING! BEACUASE I'LL TELL YOU SOEMTHING! THIS IS A HAPPY PLACE!"

Jeepers crawls away slowly on all fours. Then Rye approaches Duo.

Rye: "That was really brave of you back there."

Duo; "Well, I.."

Rye grabs his head and gives him a kiss, Duo's eyes widen and his braid stands on end.

Duo: (to himself) Max and I are one in the same, maybe Rye should learn that you can't reject one, with rejecting the other.(aloud): "Look over there! It's Ban Dam and Mini Pearl!"

Changes back into Max.

Rye: "Your so funny…Hey! Where'd you come from. Rodent?! Where's the guy with the braid."

Max: "Um, over there?"

Changes back into Duo. He Picks up Rye and they share a long passionate kiss, while the cops look on. Then they brake off.

Duo: "That was shallow, cheap, and based solely on hormones………Works for me!!"

They kiss again as the episode ends.

[End credits roll]