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Obi-Wan did not get another chance to be alone with Sari for the remainder of the flight back to Teemar. The children, in their excitement to get home to their families, had managed to monopolize her attention with their individual versions of the shared adventure. Before he knew it, Teemar burst into sight, growing ever larger in the viewport as they neared the planet.
When they docked in the hangar of the Teemar Capitol Spaceport, the families of each child were anxiously waiting along with a handful of authorities. After many tear-filled hugs and welcome home kisses, the children were briefly questioned and then released to their parents. Sari and Obi-Wan were also swept off to the closest law enforcement office to brief the others on the details of the incident.
By the time they were finished telling and retelling their story several times, it was well into the evening. Neither had eaten much in the last two days, and Sari's desire for a hot meal was rivaling that of her longing for a hot bath. Home sounded wonderful to her for she couldn't bear another thought about the children for the night.
She and Obi-Wan stepped outside of the police headquarters and sighed deeply at the same time. Both snapped their heads to look at the other and then grinned.
"It's been a long day, hasn't it?" Obi-Wan asked.
"It sure has!" Sari exclaimed with a firm nod. "I am definitely ready to get home, get a bath, and go to bed! What about you?" She realized too late that her declaration may have sounded a bit like an innuendo, but she was more surprised when she admitted to herself that she wasn't really all that embarrassed.
"I guess I'd better find a room and get some rest myself," Obi added awkwardly. Sari was suddenly offended and placed her hands on her hips in defiance.
"You'll do no such thing, Obi-Wan Kenobi!" she declared. "You're coming home with me."
"But--," he began, only to be cut short.
"No buts about it! The least I can do for the man who saved my students is offer him a place to stay." She paused and lowered her gaze to the ground. Slowly, she looked back up and softly said, "Besides, I'd like to be with you for a while before....... before you have to leave."
Now she was looking boldly into his heart-melting eyes, willing him to say yes, and he did. Gently, he took her delicate hand into his large one and smiled.
"I'd like that very much, Sari," he said with his sensually accented voice. //VERY much,// he added to himself.
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They arrived at Sari's apartment not long after. The minute she crossed the threshold, a huge sigh of relief issued forth from deep within her.
"I have never been so happy to see this place!" she exclaimed. She quickly made a quick sweep of all the rooms, making sure all was as she left it. It was. The few dirty dishes from the morning of the kidnapping were still stacked by her kitchen sink, and the overflowing laundry hamper in her room was practically begging to be relieved of its contents.
Sari sighed again-- this time in disgust. "Yuck! I was hoping this would all be magically cleaned up when I got back." Obi-Wan offered a small chuckle, and then awkward silence fell between them again. //What next?// Sari thought.
"Can I get you anything? A drink? Something to eat?" she asked. Suddenly, she was very nervous about him being there. What was he expecting? What did she expect? She wasn't really sure.
Obi-Wan could sense her anxiety and felt his own building inside. "Could I borrow your holoprojector again? I should contact Anakin and the council to inform them of Perrin's involvement."
"Oh.... yeah. No problem. You know where it is, right?" He nodded. "Well, I think I'm going to jump in the shower. Three days of built-up space scum is screaming to be scrubbed away! Let me just grab some clean clothes, and I'll be out of your way." She walked back to her room, Obi-Wan following behind. He took a seat at her desk and turned on her machine.
"There are several messages on here. Would you like to look through them before I log on?" he asked.
"They might be for you, so go ahead and check them out. I'll take a look when I'm done. I can't stand this dirt for a second longer!" Then she grabbed her robe off of the bed and headed for the beckoning bathroom, certain she would feel better as soon as she was clean.
Obi-Wan pushed the 'play messages' button and sat back in his chair when the mechanical voice stated there were ten new messages. //This might take a while!// he thought.
The first few were of Anakin before Obi-Wan had contacted him on the ship to Ankara Station. The next was from Chairman Calder. He was concerned about Sari and her failure to return to school after the children were found to be missing. Next was a woman, an older version of Sari almost. He assumed it was her mother.
"Sari? You know I hate talking to these machines! Oh, well, I was just checking in on you since I hadn't heard from you in a few days. How was your date with that handsome teacher from your school? You know, you should bring him over for dinner some night, Dear."
Obi-Wan had to laugh out loud at the reference to Jaik Rafe. Wouldn't she be surprised?! But then a pang of jealousy shot through him. What would have happened to her if he had never shown up on Teemar? Would she have found that she really liked Jaik? He didn't think she would have been fooled by Rafe for long, but even a little bit of time with the creep would have been too much. He found himself wondering if Sari's mother would like him more than Jaik. //What a silly thought!// he scolded himself, but there it was anyway. Would he ever even get to meet her family? Would she even tell them about him and their bonding? He shook the thoughts away and played the next message.
It was Anakin again.
"Obi-Wan, are you okay? Be sure to contact me as soon as you can. Master Yoda seemed a little agitated after your call. I heard some of the other masters mentioning something about you and Melida/Daan. I'm not sure what that meant, but I get the sense that all is not well with you and the council. Am I right? Oh, well. Just call me as soon as you get back. May the Force be with you."
Obi-Wan pushed the replay button and listened to the boy again. Melida/Daan....... a thousand memories flooded his heart and mind. As a new padawan, he had left the Jedi to join the youth of the war-torn planet in an attempt to bring peace between the two tribes. It had taken some time and much effort on his part to be accepted back into the order after such a catastrophic move. Now, others were thinking he was going to leave again. He couldn't bring himself to be angry with them for gossiping because the thought of leaving had definitely been going through his mind lately. He sat in quiet contemplation just staring at the screen, never noticing Sari standing in the doorway.
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Sari remained silent as she watched his profile from the door. She couldn't help but wonder about Anakin's message. Who was Melida Daan? The mention of the name had brought a pained look to his face. Then Anakin had mentioned Obi-Wan leaving the Jedi , and her heart jumped at the possibility.
//Is he truly considering giving it all up?-- For me?// she pondered. Part of her was very flattered, if indeed that was the case. There was nothing more she would like than to be with him.
However, her practical, logical, and highly ethical side knew she could never let him leave the order, especially since she had come to understand how much of his life had been spent attaining his current position.
No.... she wouldn't let him do it.
"Is everything okay?" she finally asked. Startled, Obi-Wan turned to find her standing at the door in her lavender satin robe. He wasn't sure if it was the surprise of finding her there or of finding her there looking so stunning that made him catch his breath. Even though her dark hair was wet, it still hung in soft curls around her delicate face. The clean scent of her was already wafting its way through the air to his nose.
"Sari!" he exclaimed. "You startled me."
"You were so lost in your thoughts. I didn't want to interrupt, but would you like to talk?" she asked as she entered the room and sat down on the corner of her bed.
"It was just Anakin," he replied, obviously trying to avoid a discussion. "You had a message from your mother. She was wondering how your date with Jaik turned out." He laughed nervously, hoping his ploy would work. He didn't know if he could share his true feelings with her now. He had had the confidence on board the shuttle, but now it was nowhere to be found.
"Who is Melida Daan?" Sari asked boldly, her curiosity getting the best of her. The surprised look on his unshaven face turned quickly back to a frown. She was somewhat perturbed by his lack of an answer, which only made her more determined to get a response.
"I think I deserve to know who she is, considering we're bonded--- unless you had already forgotten about that." Obi-Wan could sense her insecurity and didn't quite know how he should respond. Sari continued.
"Her name sure sent you into another world. Is she your girlfriend?" Sari knew she was being blatantly jealous and juvenile, but she couldn't help herself. If she had let herself fall for a man who was already involved with someone else, well..... she would be ...... upset.
Obi-Wan couldn't help himself. He laughed out loud causing her to teeter on the edge of mild fury.
"I don't think it's funny, Obi-Wan Kenobi!" she declared, her eyes shooting daggers straight at him. "If you have another woman--- or women---- I want to know right now!"
Still grinning, he got up and walked over to the bed, kneeling in front of Sari and taking her hands in his. Gazing up into her fiery blue eyes, Obi-Wan was suddenly struck by how much he had come to care for her. So much, in fact, that he was contemplating a life outside the order.
"Melida/Daan is not a person. It's a planet," he said softly. Realization slowly dawned on Sari, and her look softened. Obi then pushed a stray curl behind her ear. "And you are the only woman in my life, Sari Zendar. No other women..... just you." His voice and touch were so gentle that she just melted into his hands.
"Just me?" she managed to whisper. Obi-Wan leaned up near her face and gazed deeply into her eyes.
"Just you," he repeated almost inaudibly. Then he pressed his lips tenderly to hers, and her every nerve sprung to life at his touch. It only took a moment for her arms to instinctively wrap around his neck, and she found herself returning his kisses with more fervor than she expected.
Finally, in need of a breath, Sari pulled back. They just sat there, both breathing rapidly, staring into each other's eyes, not wanting to look away or let go. She could still taste him on her mouth and was certain the feel of his lips would be forever etched in her memory.
"I don't want you to go," she blurted out. //Why did you say that?!// she scolded herself silently. It was exactly what she had intended NOT to say. Again, he was a bit taken aback, but his Jedi cool allowed him to recover quickly. He moved to the bed beside her before responding.
"I don't want to go either," he admitted with a grin. Now Sari was the one in shock.
"You don't?" she asked.
"No, I don't. I would love to stay here... with you." Was she hearing him correctly? A huge smile spread across her face, but then quickly faded.
"But?" she added. "It can't be that simple. There has to be a 'but'."
Now his smile disappeared. It was time to lay all of their sabaac cards out on the table.
"You're right. There always seems to be a 'but' right where you don't want it to be, doesn't there?"
She simply nodded and could feel her chest tightening into a giant knot of dread. Hopefully she could hold back the tears that she could already feel pooling in her eyes. She had to be strong--- for his sake.
"The truth is that I do want to be with you, Sari...... BUT-- my life just isn't that simple. I made a vow when I became a Jedi. I committed myself to train Anakin. I promised Qui-Gon, and I can't go back on that promise." He could see the tears welling in Sari's eyes, and his heart broke.
"I understand," she somehow managed to mutter over the lump in her throat.
"No, I don't think you understand all of it," he interjected as he gently lifted her chin. "I love you, Sari. It's something beyond explanation.... something I never thought would happen in my life, but it has. And I can't just let it go, despite my promises as a Jedi."
What was all of this leading up to?, she wondered.
"I love you, too," she said. The words seemed to free and bind her all at the same time, but they had been said and could not be taken back. His eyes sparkled with joy at her revelation, and he pulled her into his embrace, kissing her damp hair and squeezing so tight that she thought she might break in two.
"You could come with me," he offered in hope once his grip had loosened. "I could finish Anakin's training, and I'm sure I could find you a teaching position on Coruscant if you wanted. Or you wouldn't even have to work. I could take care of you. Granted, I'm not wealthy, but I'll provide everything you need."
Sari looked at his face and saw not the confident Jedi knight Kenobi, but instead an impulsive, idealistic young man that wasn't thinking logically. His innocent eagerness almost convinced her that such a reality was possible for them...... almost.
"What would the Jedi council say? You told me that not many Jedi married and those that did, usually left the order. Are you sure they would approve or even let us be together?"
Obi looked at her in confusion. "Sari, being a Jedi doesn't make me a slave to the council. I'm still an individual with my own life to lead." However, as he said it, he recalled how many times he had felt like a slave. He tried to shake it off. " We could figure all of that out when the time came. I just want to be with you .... if you want to be with me, that is."
"Of course, I want to be with you!" she declared. "I just......" she trailed off.
"What?" he urged her to continue.
"I just.... there's a lot to think about. My family is here. My job is here. It's all I've ever known. Plus, I can't just let you throw away all you've worked for. Being a Jedi is your whole life. You told me that yourself. You might come to find that I wasn't worth all you'd have to forsake. I couldn't let you do that." Sari lowered her eyes and felt a few hot tears stream down her cheeks. She couldn't let him ruin his life for her. Looking back up, she found him staring at her. "What is it?" she asked after a sniffle.
"I'm still stuck on the you won't 'let' me part," he said with a grin. She had to grin, too, at his repeat of her words from much earlier in their experience together. "It's not about you 'letting' me do anything," he continued. "It's what I want....... I had hoped it was what you wanted, too."
Sari was torn as she looked into his eyes. He was eagerly awaiting her response.... the words that might determine their futures..... the words that could lead them down the right or wrong path. What should she say? Her mind and heart reeled with the choices and their possible outcomes.