Buffy opened her eyes, biting down on her lip. "There!"
Giles gave her an admiring glance. He whispered to her under his breath. "Well done…that was very impressive."
The door to the training room swung open with an enormous gust of wind. The Slayer put out her hands in alarm, but it was too late. The complicated house of cards fell to the floor, covering the table in hearts and diamonds. "Oh…Xander, that took me all day…what's wrong with him?"
Watcher and Slayer stared at the unconscious figure of Spike lying on the floor. Xander pointed excitedly. "He…I…I…found him, in the sun…and there was no dust…and he was speaking funny…and he was breathing…and…"
Buffy had crossed over to Spike's side, and cautiously put her hand on his chest. Her eyes widened and she turned to the others. "He's got a heartbeat!"
Xander rolled his eyes. "Well, duh. That's exactly what I said…"
Giles rubbed his forehead, and watched bemusedly as the two younger people propped Spike up against the door. "He's alive? Where did you find him?"
"In the dumpster. He was just lying there, and…woah, think he's coming around."
Spike's eyes were open, and Buffy couldn't place the emotion she saw there. It was strange on that face… Then she had it. He was scared. William's eyes fluttered open. He seemed to be in some sort of room, filled with strange weapons and even a scarecrow…there were other people with him. Immediately he scrambled backwards against the door. One was the gawking youth he'd met before he…fainted…another was an older man, who seemed to be laughing, and the third…the third… She was at once familiar and strange. Her face was like the sun, her hair like spun gold. With an angel's eyes and grace, she made his heart lift in his breast. She was infinitely more beautiful than Cecily could ever have been…this one shone from inside. Pure and true, with an inner light that blinded his sight… "Spike? Why are you staring at me like that? Do you remember me? Xander? Anything?"
"Surely, my lady, I would never have forgotten one such as yourself… and if I had, then I am a fool indeed."
Buffy exchanged a slightly amused look with the others. "Um…Spike…it's me, Buffy."
"Ahhh, Buffy. Buffy…such a beautiful name…more attractive by far than Cecily…"
"Okay, do you have sun stroke? Look, all I want to know is how you became human. Was it that demon last night? With the ray thingy?"
William shook his head sadly. This divine creature of light and loveliness must be simple. He spoke gently. "You are mistaken. There are no such things as demons, and it would be better to not speak of them…should the Father John hear of such blasphemy…"
The mention of the priest suddenly reminded him of home. And the fact that he wasn't at home. And that all these people spoke with foreign accents, and had apparently concealed him in an underground room filled with weapons… "Arrrgh! You are foreign strangers! Please do not torture me, kind sirs! I know nothing of anything! I am but a poor simple clerk, who would never hurt anyone…please, think of my mother…"
He ashamedly felt a single tear roll down his face. These people would surely torture him…he had heard that the Spanish in particular were merciless with prisoners. Images of his family filled his mind… how he would never see them again…and how worthless his entire life had been. Nobody ever chose him…no-one had ever loved him…and now he was going too die. Buffy thought that if he eyes widened any more they'd shoot right out of her head. Spike was crying? He was so scared...she noticed the way his hands were shaking, his legs weak… "Don't worry Spi…William."
He sniffed, and frowned. "How did you know my name?"
Understanding began to dawn on Buffy. "Umm…we…we're here to help you…"
"Help me to do what, if I may be so bold to ask?"
"Help you to improve your clerk…diploma."
His mouth struggled with the unusual word. "Dip..pler..ma?"
Buffy nodded enthusiastically. "Right!"
She grabbed the other two by the arms, and led them into the corner, while William repeated the word over and over again. "Look, I think I know what's happened. Spike has somehow been turned into a human by that big demon thing…and he's got his soul back. Angel said that to start with he didn't remember all the people he'd killed properly…so all we have to do is sit back and wait for the guilt to kick in."
She leaned back, a smug smile on her face. Giles raised an eyebrow. "You're enjoying this, aren't you?"
She nodded. "You must remember, Buffy, that William will be very different to Spike. However much you… hated…Spike, please try not to take it out on William."
The Slayer pouted. "I won't."
Spike screamed into the night. "I. Am. Back!"
The blood stained his mouth crimson, and he paused before wiping it off with the back of his hand. It just felt so bloody delicious…thick and warm, liquid and slippery…he rubbed it around in puddles on the floor, and smiled at the patterns. Stumbling backwards, he tripped over something. "What the..."
The body was still there. For some reason, it made him feel uneasy to know that it was there. That it was dead, and he had caused it. Probably because the Slayer would kill him. The Slayer. That was the next stop. Oh, the Slayer was in for it now. Stupid little Slayer, always making fun, always laughing at him… thought she was so great…well, Little Miss I've Got a Crappy Name was in for a shock… Wait. This was…wrong. He frowned, and spoke under his breath. "Wasn't I supposed…to feel something else about her?"
Spike shrugged, and as a last thought, stood on the head of the dead person. Its skull shattered with a satisfying crack. Grey matter slid out on to the cold street like vital jelly. It mingled with the dirt and the dust of former years. Spike felt like all his dirt and dust had been washed away. Everything was so much clearer. It was as though the fog which had descended on his mind ever since he'd come to Sunnydale had suddenly lifted. It was like old times. All he lived for was the kill. There was no grey, only black and white. He grinned, and lit a cigarette. "0h yeah. I'm back."
Buffy felt like screaming. She hissed. "Giles! Why do I have to be in charge of him?"
"Because for some reason he's human. Maybe the demon needs him in a spell, or for some ritual…at any rate, he's vulnerable. And I want him under your protection. Now go. Let us work."
"What am I meant to do? Take him for ice cream?"
William looked scared again. "I scream?"
She shook her head in exasperation. "No. But you will in a minute if you don't shut up."
Buffy glared at her Watcher. "Goodbye."
She started towards the door. William quickly scurried over and blocked her way. Buffy threw her hands above her head, and got ready to yell. Then she saw that he'd opened the door for her and was holding it back politely, looking at her expectantly. The angry expression left her face, and a puzzled one replaced it. At least this new Spike had manners. "After you, my lady."
"Um…thank you."
"The pleasure is indeed mine."
The door swung shut behind them, and Xander sat down heavily. "That was surreal."
Giles nodded. "Very."
"Miss Buffy?"
"Yeah...and it's just Buffy. Okay?"
"Miss…I mean, Buffy…may I be so brash as to ask you to try and help me find some other…articles of clothing? It's just that these are not mine, and I…"
Buffy was smiling.
"What is it?"
"You…you always wear that outfit."
"I'm sure I've never worn it before in my life!"
"Sorry...forgot about the amnesia. Well…I can't really imagine you wearing anything else."
"I certainly wouldn't like to wear clothes of a similar fashion to your young man."
"Okay, one, he is not my young man. Second…no-one wears clothes like Xander. I think we'll just leave you like that."
"Could we at least try to repair the damage done to my hair?"
At this the Slayer snorted. Changing his clothes was one thing, but dye over Spike's trademark bleached hair? He'd look completely different. "I don't know…what colour is it normally?"
"The colour? I meant the greasiness...what about the colour?"
With a start she realised that he probably hadn't seen his reflection for over a century. "Spike...I mean, William? I don't know if you're going to remember how long it's been since you looked in a mirror.."
"I looked in one just last night, at the party…"
"Well, look again." She produced a small hand compact from a pretty pink shoulder bag. William still found it hard to take in all of the vibrant colours used so freely in this place. He accepted the small mirror, and looked into it. What he saw and thought disturbed him. At first the image was a blur of meaningless colour. Then he brought it closer, and his vision cleared. It was the same feeling he got whenever he saw the radiant Buffy…familiar and yet strange…it was his own face of course. Same angular cheekbones, same lips and nose. Yet this face was handsome. This face had lips that seemed to mold easily into a flirtatious smirk, eyes of a brighter blue that held passion in their depths…the hair. His hair was short and almost white…it was the hair of a dangerous man. And it disturbed him that it seemed to suit his face. There was a scar. He felt it cautiously, scared again. And it wasn't a recent scar…no, it had been embedded in his skin years before…he could almost remember… William bit his lip hard in frustration. "Why can't I remember?"
Buffy again felt a twinge of sorrow for him as he looked into her eyes, obviously deeply affected by the reflection in the mirror. Then she remembered. She remembered how he'd fought with her before, how he'd killed two Slayers, how he'd kill her in a heartbeat if he could. And she smiled again, coldly. "You'll remember soon enough, William. And then…you'll wish you could forget."
*****