THE RIVERDALE WITCH PROJECT
A "Archie's Weird Mysteries"/ "Sabrina the Teenage Witch" crossover
By
Patrick Moore
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story takes place where the "Archie's Weird Mysteries" animated series left off.
Chapter 1
It was a Saturday night at the home of Archie Andrews. Archie sat in the living room couch eating a bag of pork rinds and drinking a can of grape soda. Just then, his best friend, Jughead Jones, came out of the kitchen carrying sandwiches, bags of potato chips, and a tub of cookie dough ice cream.
"I can't wait, Arch," said Jughead, as he laid the food on the living room table. "We've been waiting all season for the final episode of our favorite science fiction show."
"Me too, Jug," said Archie. "The X Folders has been one of our favorite shows for years now. Now we get to see the final episode, before it goes into syndication. This show got me started writing my Weird Mysteries articles for the school paper."
Archie began to turn the TV volume up, when he heard the TV announcer say, "For you X Folders fans out there, I'm sad to said that the final episode will not be seen tonight, due to the live edition of Urban Nightlife with Polly Cooper."
Both Archie and Jughead screamed.
"What's all the screaming about?" said Mr. Andrews, as he came in the living room. "Was your X Folder show too scary for you boys?"
"They cancelled our show, Dad," said Archie.
"I thought it was the final episode?" asked Mr. Andrews.
"It got replaced by Betty's sister's new news series," answered Jughead. "Now we got to wait until next week to see it."
"I heard that Betty's sister started working on a news series on the paranormal and the supernatural of America for months now, but I never thought she go on with it," Mr. Andrews ate some of Archie's pork rinds from a bowl. "Archie, aren't you suppose to met Betty and the gang at Pop's sometime tonight?"
Archie looked at his watch and gasped, "I almost forgot."
"Forgot what, Arch?" asked Jughead.
"We were suppose to met Betty and the others at Pop's for a meeting for the school paper," answered Archie.
"Didn't you tell them that we were going to watch the final X Folders episode tonight?"
"I forgot to tell them."
"Not only you're clumsy, Archie, but you're forgetful," said Jughead.
"I am not clumsy, Jughead," said Archie. "Who started that stupid rumor about me being a clumsy idiot?"
Jughead just shrugged.
# # # # # #
"Where is that Archie?" asked Betty Cooper to Veronica Lodge and Reggie Mantle inside Pop's Soda Shop. "If he isn't here in the next ten minutes, he can forget our date Friday night."
"If I know 'Carrot Top', his jalopy broke down again," said Reggie.
"I just fixed it for him last week," said Betty.
"I hope he isn't at Cheryl Blossom's house," said Veronica, as she gritted her teeth at the name of Cheryl Blossom. "Ever since she came back to Riverdale, she's been fixed on dating Archie."
Just then, Archie and Jughead finally appear.
"Looks like the two stooges finally showed up," laughed Reggie.
"Shut up, Reggie," said Archie. "We didn't know the meeting was going to be on the night the final episode of the X Folders was going to air."
"You still watch that stupid show, Archie?" asked Reggie. "No one cares about sci-fi shows anymore, they now watch those reality shows now."
"X Folders is the hottest show around, Reggie Mantle," frowned Archie. "It's bigger than that Survivor show you guys watch."
"Archiekins," said Veronica, "some of us are not big sci-fi buffs like you and Jughead are. I like to watch those teen based dramas on TV."
"Like that Daria cartoon?" asked Jughead, while he ate some hamburgers from a large, round pizza tin.
"That doesn't count, Jughead," said Veronica, as she turned back to Archie. "You see, Archie, we're not into sci-fi genre anymore."
"I understand, Veronica," said Archie, "you and the other have lost you faith with the X Folders' fans out in the world, but me and Jug haven't."
"I have to agree with Ronnie, Arch," said Jughead. "X Folders is getting to be boring year after year. The show hasn't thought of a good idea for an episode since they replaced Molder with that Daggett jerk to pair up with Gully this season."
"Traitor," said Archie to Jughead. "The X Folders will live on forever, and I'll still write my Weird Mysteries article in the school paper, even if the show gets cancelled."
"That's why we're scraping you stupid article, Carrot Top," said Reggie, with an evil smirk on his face.
Archie was shocked after hearing what Reggie just said. "What?!" he said.
"I'm sorry, Archie," said Betty, "but we decided to shut down Archie's Weird Mysteries for good. We know that we've been confronted by vampires, werewolves, alien invaders, and even killer potatoes, but it's time to call it quits."
"Tough luck, Archie," laughed Reggie. "Maybe you can do an article on Mrs. Lodge's garden party."
"Shut up, Reggie," said Betty, "you're no help on this anyway."
"I want to write one more story, before I call it quits," said Archie. "I want to do an article on the Riverdale Witch."
Everyone was shocked at what Archie said about the legendary Riverdale Witch, even Jughead stopped eating after what he just heard.
"Are you crazy, Arch?" asked Jughead, after he gulped the last bite of hamburger into his stomach. "The Riverdale Witch is bad idea to write about."
"And why not?" asked Archie.
"Didn't you hear about the three campers who decided to do that film about the Riverdale Witch years ago in the seventies?" asked Betty. "When they went into the woods to find the Riverdale Witch, they never came back from the woods."
"Maybe they went to get something to eat," said Archie.
"People found their stuff all over the woods days later," continued Betty. "Maybe you shouldn't to this story, Archie."
"I'm sorry, gang," said Archie, "but I'm going to find the Riverdale Witch and prove that's she's real, even take a photo of her if I have to."
Just then Pop Tate walks up to the gang's table. "I'm starting to close up shop, kids," he said. "Who's going to pay for the burgers?"
Everyone pointed to Archie.
"Why me?" asked Archie.
"It's your turn, Carrot Head," insulted Reggie. "Veronica paid the last time we had a meeting here, now it's you turn to pay for the burgers."
Archie took out a twenty-dollar bill and gave it to Pop. "Broke again," he said with a sigh.
# # # # # #
Sabrina Spellman was in her room reading the latest Harry Potter book, when her Aunt Zelda entered the room with a shocked look on her face.
"Sabrina," said Aunt Zelda, "I just saw something on television that you should have seen."
"What is it, Aunt Zelda?" asked Sabrina.
"I just saw that Polly Cooper show and it had a story on the Riverdale Witch."
"Every witch knows that the Riverdale Witch is nothing but an urban legend just to scare mortals into believing that witches are real, and to hunt us down like foxes."
Just then, Aunt Hilda and Salem, the family's black cat, entered the room.
"What's going on in here?" asked Aunt Hilda.
"Did Quigley replace my cat litter again?" asked Salem, who was really a warlock who got turned into a cat by the Witches Council. "I was about to watch the X Folders, when I heard they replaced it with another one of those reality based shows. I hate when that happens."
"This is serious, Salem," said Zelda. "The Witches Council imprisoned the Riverdale Witch in a giant oak tree in the wood ten thousand years ago, and I just read in the paper that Hiram Lodge is going to tear down that tree."
"Why would Veronica's dad tear down that tree that imprisoned the Riverdale Witch?" asked Sabrina. "Doesn't he know what he's going to unleash on to Riverdale?"
"That why we got to stop him from cutting down that tree, Sabrina," said Zelda, "before all of Riverdale is under her evil spell."
"Something tells me that we need Buffy the Vampire Slayer on this one," said Salem, "or maybe Space Ghost."
TO BE CONTINUED IN CHAPTER 2