~~~*Shattered Glass*~~~
~~~*Heero's Point of View*~~~
"No…leave her alone!" I heard my voice, yet, at the same time, didn't really hear it. It seemed to be coming from all directions at once…and yet, at the same time, from nowhere. It echoed off of everything…and yet, there still seemed to be no sound.
"Omae O Korosu," I heard myself mutter, once again with the same strange effects.
And I raised my gun.
~~~*~~~
I sat up with a jerk. Forced my eyes open, then collapsed back onto my bed. A dream. Again.
But not just any dream. The same dream.
The same dream that I had been having for…days. Weeks, maybe…I couldn't quite remember. It seemed that each time I dreamed it, it was as if it had been melded in with every other version of the dream.
It was always different. And yet, at the same time, it was always the same. It always happened in a different setting…
But the parts that mattered were the same. The heart…the core…it never differed.
It was always me and her. Me and her. And him.
Who was him you ask? I didn't know. He was always hidden in the shadows…I could never see his face.
I didn't even know if it was a he…
But he was always trying to kill her.
Relena.
And, for some reason, I always tried to stop him.
Don't ask me why. I wouldn't be able to answer. Even if I wanted too.
But it always tore at my heart…my soul…to see her sprawled out on the ground…blood seeping from her delicate body.
And it always filled me with rage beyond what I had ever felt, even at the worst of moments.
And I always swore to kill him.
In my mind, I saw an immediate reply of the whole thing…
I shook my head, trying to get rid of the images. That was it.
With that, I threw back my covers. I needed to go for a walk.
Yeah. That was it. I would go for a walk. I'd just walk until I got…where? Somewhere. That was it. Until I had gotten somewhere.
It was slightly chilly outside. But I barely noticed. And I didn't really care.
I just walked. And walked. And walked…
…Until somehow, I ended up on some excluded beach…there was no one there.
A fact for which I was thankful. I wanted to be alone…
But if there had been someone there, it wouldn't have mattered. I'd probably just have killed whoever it was.
Unless it was Relena, some inner voice threw at me.
I started. Where had that come from?
From your heart…
That was just crazy. I had been taught that a perfect soldier didn't need
I shook my head again. Shook it to get rid of the unwelcome thoughts, and focused on two words. No emotion.
That was right. No emotion. No emotion whatsoever, other than anger.
Without a word, I sank down onto the rough sand, letting my feet submerge in the cold, clear water.
The moonlight seemed to sparkle off of the ocean, making it look like broken crystal…like shattered glass.
That was it. Shattered glass.
Kind of like what I was feeling. As if my whole being was just…shattered glass.
I didn't know what to feel. Anger, at the dream; at the person in the dream…or…some other emotion. I couldn't come up with the name of any other emotion except for anger, at the moment.
Anger. It was all I knew.
Except in the dream.
Then, I felt sadness. Grief. Over Relena.
The thought surprised me. I had never really registered it, before.
But, yes. I felt sadness…grief, even, over Relena in my dream. Because she had been killed.
What was it trying to tell me? Because I knew that it was trying to tell me something. I could feel it. I just didn't know what it was. Yet.
I sat there for…I don't know how long. I just knew that it was for quite some time.
And the early hour of the morning began to take its toll.
I was so tired…so very tired…
But I didn't want to go to sleep…because I knew that I would dream, once again…
My eyelids felt so heavy…like they were being weighed down with bricks…
I couldn't go to sleep! Couldn't dream…because I would feel another emotion…an emotion other than anger.
And the thought didn't really appeal to me. Anger was all that I really knew. And I didn't exactly feel like learning any other emotions at the moment.
So tired…
I sat there for a little while longer, trying to fight off sleep.
And then, I couldn't hold it off any longer. With barely another thought other than the release of tiredness that sleep would bring, I lay my head down on the rough sand, and fell asleep to the sound of the waves rocking back and forth.
~~~*~~~
"No…leave her alone!" I heard my voice, yet, at the same time, didn't really hear it. It seemed to be coming from all directions at once…and yet, at the same time, from nowhere. It echoed off of everything…and yet, there still seemed to be no sound.
I felt like…like shattered glass, as I stared at her dead body. I didn't know what to feel. Anger, at the person who had done this…or grief over the fact that she was gone.
"Omae O Korosu," I heard myself mutter, once again with the same strange effects.
And I raised my gun
The End.
Goddess of the Gun