I am Baka no Yamucha. Baka for the simple reason that I have given up the woman who I love to a lousy sajjin, a sajjin I despise nonetheless. I haven't been so afraid of one man in my entire life. I am just a simple human, more than likely the weakest among all of us. And he could snap my neck like a twig.

I am baka, but not blind. I didn't miss the looks that Bulma sometimes got on her face when she watched him. I didn't miss the way he looked back at her either. And obviously neither did Son Goku.
Yes, yes the Son Goku who is dead, I'm getting to that part. Lets start from the begging, ne?


It was not a day like any other. I was laying in Bulma's bed with her sheet over me and a cigarette clamped between my teeth searching for a match or light. Anything. When I stop rustling the sheets I can hear her and Vejjita outside the room. They are talking. About what I cannot hear, but I can't be that important... can it?

"B-Chan!" I call to her. She bounds happily in the room and plops down onto the bed. "Do you hava light punkin?" She plucks the cigarette from my lips.

"I thought I asked you to stop." She says softly. She and I have battled over this time and time again. I glance over at an empty coffee cup.

"And I thought I asked you to stop that." She looks at me for a moment then leans over and kisses me.

"Please? Not today?" I smile and brush my lips against hers.

"Yeah." Things are going to smoothly for me too fuck it up over a Pall Mall. She checks her watch as she chucks the Pall Mall out the window.

"You have a ball game at six tonight. Don't forget, oh and please, please, please throw your stuff in the wash before you come to bed." Before I can answer she is off the bed and setting the alarm for five fifteen.

"Ai shiteru!" She calls to me just before the door is shut. Rolling over I sigh and force myself to sleep before the game.

Sometimes I wonder weather or not I would have lost Bulma if I hadn't gone to sleep.

But I did go to sleep, and I did loose her. Stupid me.

"Yamucha-chan! Wake up!" At first I am not sure if it is actually him I am hearing. But he sounds like no other. It has to be him. As my eyes open I see his cherry face grinning at mine.

"Son Goku?" I sound puzzled, hell I am puzzled. He is dead...so am I dead? Or is he alive?

"Baka!" He says smiling still. "I am still dead and you are still alive!" Still confused I take his offered hand and he pulls me to my feet. Bulma's voice sounds in my head telling me not to forget the game.

"I know about that, I'll send you back in time."

"Back?" I ask becoming irritated with him.

"Hai, your body is in bed, but your soul is here with me." He explains. I nod. Wasting no time he pulls me toward him. "You have to let her go."

"Nani!" I snap struggling to pull away from him.

"Bulma," He pauses and gets a better grip on my shirt. "You have to let her go." I know what he means before he explains it. Son Goku has not visited my dreams this one time. He has come many times pleading with me to let her go.

"I can't," I tell him sadly. "I love her."

"Can't or wont!" Goku asks. I notice his breath has not smell. Its seemingly just air. I stare at him for a very long time.

"Will you tell me why?" I ask.

"For her sake should be a good enough answer, but I suppose...I can let you know that I will die again and that means the world as we know it will end. You must see." I want to yell at him that he doesn't understand. Things are going so well for us! We haven't had a fight for the past month and a half. But I can't say that. Not to a man who has given up so much for a filthy planet as this.

"Yes fine." He hugs me close and kisses my cheek.

"Yes." He says.

But now I am awake and in hopes that it was a dream. My heart tells me it was not. I listen to it.

I mutter about these things as I pull off my clothes and take a cold shower. Soon enough I am rubbing the water off with a towel and blindly throwing my uniform on. Shoving my hat down I walk to the field.

The two miles gives me time to think. Time to plan. To plan the way I am going to break off a perfectly fantastic relationship to give to woman I love to some Sajjin. I want to hate him for taking her before he even knows he has her, but I cannot. Somewhere inside of me I know that he will take care of her. He will be good to her, better than I have ever been.

I play that game, batting harder and throwing faster. We win of course, the team I am on always wins. The fans cheer and surge around. I sign the autographs and entertain the kiddies. Then I walk the two miles home. There is a note lightly tapped to the washing machine.

Yamucha-
Don't forget! Change!
B-Chan

I smile and slowly fold the note than slip it into my pocket. I still have it. I look at it before I go to bed and when I wake up.

"B-Chan," I call softly as I enter the room. Its dark, but I can make out her slender curvy figure on the bed.

"Hi..." She says softly and sleepily.

"I don't think we should see each other anymore." She is wide-awake now. Her arm grips mine tightly.

"That's not funny." She says. I tell her that I don't mean it to be funny, I am serious. Gripping my arm tighter she slaps my face.

"Stop it! Now!" She is sobbing in between her words. I stand to leave.

"I'll get my stuff now." She is screaming that I am a bastard. I gather my things quickly.

"I hate you!" She cries and chucks a shoe at me. It hits my right shin, I barley feel it. All the while I am tell her I am sorry. I am so sorry. She asks me how I can do this.

I ask myself how I can do this.

When I exit the room Vejjita is standing by the door. He watches me puzzled. I glare at him wanting to feel hate that won't come.

"You can thank Son Goku," I tell him. "Take care of her." He nods and I walk out of that portion of her life forever.

Do you see why I am Baka no Yamucha? No I suppose you don't.