CHAPTER EIGHT
General Hammond sighed, wishing there was some other conclusion to the tale. "So that explains why you all came toppling through the gate."
"And Major Carter's injuries." It was the first time Dr. Fraiser had spoken during the debriefing, and Daniel almost looked up in surprise at her presence. "The force of the falling debris must have been quite a lot, judging by the contusion on Major Carter's head."
"What's the prognosis?" The General swivelled around slightly to face the doctor.
"I won't lie to you General, it's not the best I could hope for. It's been twenty-four hours and ... the earlier you wake up from a coma, the better the chances are for full recovery. I ... I just don't know Sir. The best I can give you is that it's all up to Major Carter now." Dr. Fraiser's voice remained neutral as the rest of the room absorbed her opinion. It definitely wasn't the best moment of her life.
The General stood up. "Okay people, I'd say that just about does it for today. It's been a rough day, and I want you all to go on stand-down, and get some rest." He glanced momentarily at Jack, "And that includes you Colonel O'Neill. However ... " his voice softened as he shot a sympathetic look across the room, "I understand the stakes you people have here with Major Carter in a coma, so ... just take it easy, okay?"
Daniel and Teal'c nodded slightly in acknowledgment, while Jack remained stone still. General Hammond appeared to not notice.
"Right. Dismissed." As Jack stood up he heard the General mutter softly to him, "Can I see you for a minute Jack?"
Jack would much rather have raced back to Sam's bedside after the debriefing, but General Hammond had voiced his request in such a tone that suggested that he wouldn't take no for an answer. He acquiesced, and followed the portly General back to his office.
"Close the door, Jack." Under normal circumstances, Colonel O'Neill would have been a bit apprehensive at the General's serious tone, but juxtaposed next to the prospect that Sam may never wake up, he found that he wasn't concerned about whatever the General wanted to talk to him about.
The General looked across his imposing mahogany table to the younger man, giving him a faint, sympathetic glance.
"Jack ... I know you're worried about Major Carter, we all are." He paused, not quite knowing how to phrase what he had to say. "But I've noticed these past few days that your behaviour has suggested that ... well, that your relationship with Major Carter isn't ... as platonic as the regulations would allow."
It took a moment for the significance of the General's statement to register with Jack, and then he exploded. He couldn't help it - all the pent up frustration at Sam's injury, the sense and the guilt that he hadn't been doing his job properly in protecting her, that it wasn't fair that she was the one lying there - it all poured out of him in that one, irrational instant.
"Carter is in a coma! A *coma* dammit, and you ask me to come here to talk about regulations?! Don't you get it - I don't care what happens to me or my career! If Sam never wakes up my life is over anyway, don't you get it? My life would be *over* ..." Suddenly the tide of irrational anger ebbed away almost as quickly as it erupted, and Jack was left with no energy to fight.
General Hammond was right - the past few days he *had* displayed a heightened emotion towards Sam, he couldn't help it. He just couldn't care about protecting his career, or her career, any more ... especially not in the face of the fact that she could never wake up again. It was the first time in a long time that the suave, confident Colonel Jack O'Neill had lost control entirely over his emotions, but the strange thing was, he didn't seem to care. There was only one thing he truly, truly cared about now - and that was Sam.
He had all but admitted to the General that he and Sam's relationship had crossed that boundary, the boundary over which Air Force regulations did not allow, but the General's expression was not one of shocked incomprehension as Jack half-expected it would be. It was one of comfortable resignation.
The General seemed to brush aside Jack's momentary insubordination as he sighed. "Jack, do y'all think I'm stone deaf? Or blind? I ..." he seemed embarrassed by the admission, "I've long observed that you and Major Carter were never going to be just friends. You don't get to be General by not observing what your subordinates are up to ..." Jack was surprised at that. He thought that while patient and forgiving, General Hammond was an officer who played by the book, and would not have taken contravention of military regulations quite as easily as what he was demonstrating now.
He coughed. "You and Major Carter are adults, and it is absolutely none of my business what you do on stand down ..." He hesitated. "I've seen during the past few years that it hasn't really affected the workings of the team ... As far as I'm concerned SG-1 is still the finest team we have here on base."
General Hammond's unabashed praise touched Jack's heart completely. "Thank you Sir. I ... I don't know what to say."
"Well ..." General Hammond cleared his throat again. "The point is, the past few days you've shown very clearly that ..." he sighed again, testament to how truly difficult this talk was. "Some of the Appropriations Committee's representatives happened to be doing a routine tour of the facilities yesterday, and even with Major Davis working for us at the Pentagon ..." The General's voice trailed off as the full impact of what he said hit Jack.
The Appropriations Committee ... It immediately reminded Jack of Senator Kinsey, and how he absolutely detested the secrecy of the Stargate Program. So much so that as soon as he heard about Jack's behaviour the past couple of days he was bound to cause trouble for him, for Sam, and for the SGC. Jack sighed as he buried his face in his hands. On top of Sam's condition, he also had to worry about his career, and more importantly ... Sam's career. What had he done?
General Hammond clearly followed Jack's train of thought as Jack dejectedly said, "What can I do?"
"Jack ... I don't think there's anything else you can do besides resign. Retire. I'll back date it a couple of days ..."
Jack's face almost blanched. "Retire?" He said blankly, not really comprehending the suggestion. Retire from the SGC? Retire from the life he had managed to create for himself here, at the base? Retire from commanding SG-1, and going on missions? He was no spring chicken, and he knew that one day in the not-too-distant future he would have to retire, but ... surely it was too early for him to do so? Sure, there were aspects he didn't like - the trees they always seemed to encounter for one thing, but then ... There were other aspects that he really *did* like ... Daniel's incessant buzzing about rocks and other ... stuff ... Sam's unquenchable enthusiasm for all things scientific ... Hell he even liked Teal'c's constantly monotonous expression ... Himself getting things wrong all the time and having to be corrected by Sam or Daniel ...
"I'm sorry Jack, I can't think of any other way." The General's kindly voice interrupted his thoughts. "I'll give you a few hours to think about it ... After that it'll be too late."
"Yes ... Sir, I ... appreciate what you're trying to do for me. I'll get back to you on that." Jack slowly stood up and headed for the door, the possibility of retirement that having really sunk in as yet.
General Hammond watched Jack's retreating figure with regret. It was a sad day for the SGC to have Colonel Jack O'Neill retiring, all because of one useless regulation. If only there was another way. If only.
* * *
Daniel twisted his neck back and forth, trying to loosen up already knotted neck muscles as he stared blankly at the computer monitor. For the last two hours he had been trying to take his mind off SG-1's last mission, but the details kept on coming back to him, becoming more vivid with each passing moment. It was getting unbearable. Somehow, it seemed so much worse that Sam was in a coma, instead of being captured by a Gao'uld or other enemy. This was something they couldn't fight as a team, couldn't help Sam with - she was alone, and they were powerless to aid her.
He looked up to find Jack at the door, his figure framed in half-shadow by the dimly lit corridor behind him.
"Danny."
"Jack."
There was a pause, as if Jack didn't know what else to say. Yet there was clearly something on his mind, Daniel could tell by the expression on his face.
"What's the matter?"
Jack sighed deeply, a sigh that suddenly reminded Daniel of how old his friend was getting. He and Jack had had their share of differences in the past ... *a lot* of differences ... But somehow in the end these differences merely served to make their friendship all the more stronger.
Jack entered the lab, closing the door behind him. Daniel frowned in concern at the seriousness of Jack's expression.
He sighed again. "Hammond said I should retire."
"What?" Daniel was incredulous. Why on earth?...
"'Cause the Appropriations Committee people were here the past few days. Apparently saw the way I was acting. Jumped to conclusions ... And we both know who'll make the most out of this."
Daniel did know. Senator Kinsey.
Daniel sat back onto his chair, removing his glasses to rub his bleary eyes. The day just got a whole lot worse.
"I mean, they can't *make* you retire, right? I mean ... there's got to be some way you can get around this ..."
"The thing is ... I've been thinking Daniel. It's just not me any more. I wouldn't mind facing court martial, except ..."
"... You don't want to drag Sam's career down with yours."
Jack nodded, and Daniel understood his dilemma.
"What about Major Davis? He's at the Pentagon, surely ... he could something?" Could he? Even Daniel thought it was a bit of a stretch for Major Davis to pull a miracle like that out of his hat.
Jack shook his head. "It's an Air Force regs breach. If anything, there'll be a court martial."
Daniel looked penetratingly at Jack, understanding dawning on his face. "You're retiring, aren't you?"
Jack's answer was short, distinct. "Yeah."
It was Daniel's turn to sigh. Sigh at the stupidity of it. To be forced to retire just because of stupid, idiotic regulations, that didn't make sense in the first place ...
"Have you told Teal'c?"
Jack nodded. "I even did that kel'no'reem thing with him."
Daniel didn't ask what kel'no'reem had to do with talking to Teal'c about Jack retiring. There were so many things that Jack said that Daniel didn't understand, so he just let it pass.
"Well I guess I'm going to tell Hammond. I ... guess I just wanted to tell you guys first."
Daniel nodded silently, forcing himself to accept the fact that Jack would no longer be part of the team. There was a horrible, sinking feeling at the bottom of his stomach as he realised that this was the end of SG-1.
(c) Vivian Ngan January 2001