Disclaimer: I don't own Shelby or Walt or Jess.....so...okay.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Okay.....I'm not really confident about this story....I was writing it when I was sick...and so it's really weird.....I let a couple my best friends read it and they really liked it, so they told me to post it. Oh yah...if u hate it, don't review. I've had a depressing week. My friend Ty ...... well he...is really getting on my nerves, so Ty..if ure reading this..sorry I've been weird lately. Oh yah and the next time u get in my locker be prepared to die. Anyway...I have written a story called :The way home: Scott...but the writing style is totally different. If I get maybe 15 reviews on this I'll post Scott's. I need some positive reinforcement before I post another crappy story like this. Thanx. Oh yah..Walt is Shelby's stepdad. I think that's his name anywayz. If not...so sue me.
The Way Home
Shelby
"The past is a guide post, not a hitching post."
L. Thomas Holdcroft
(It took me a while to understand this quote. A guide post is something that tells u what direction to go and a hitching post is something that you would tie a horse or another animal to......so it means that the past should tell you where to go; not hold you back. Just in case you were wondering like I was, okay?)
Shelby Merrick was tired. Tired mind and body. Tired heart and soul. She was so tired of all the lies. All the secrets. They were eating her up inside and leaving a gaping, empty void. This is NOT where she had pictured herself as a little girl. She had had one dream. She had wanted to be a ballerina, but now that dream was only a memory of something that could've been. Something that WOULD'VE been if Walt had never come into her life and ruined it.
Somehow she still felt responsible for the annihilation of her dreams, even though they had left with her innocence. Walt had taken them forever, and no matter how much she longed and wished for them back they would never be back.
Shelby had felt so unclean she couldn't stand herself, and every time that she had looked into the mirror, they feeling that she needed to vomit came on so strong she almost couldn't resist. She didn't understand the things she had done, and she had thought she never would. She didn't want anyone else to understand her if she couldn't even understand herself.
Because of this she had run away. Run away from her problems and run away from Walt. In her heart she knew she would be back. She loved Jess too much to leave her, and Shelby knew Jess would be safe from Walt because she made a promise and they had a deal. But she had been stupid and she had believed him.
He mother had absolutely had it with her. She had run away too many times, and gotten caught doing too many things for her mother to handle at that point in her life. Shelby was sent to Horizon. Leaving behind Walt, the shattered dreams, and the broken promises that her life had consisted of. She hated it there at first, and even though the things she had at home were so sinful, she missed them with everything she was.
Her heart longed to hear familiar sounds like Jess singing in the morning as she got ready for yet another day of inner city school and her mother whistling nameless tunes as she scurried about getting ready for work. And yes, sometimes she even missed the creaking of her door opening late at night. What an awful to miss, but she did. He made her feel special in a way that no one else did, and sometimes, she used to think to herself, if he were to come to Horizon and tell her he loved her she would actually let him do those things.
That was before Scott came and changed her world. He showed her how to trust and taught her how to love again. Not without some work, of course. He wasn't easy to get to in the first place. Either Juliet or his own emotions were always standing in her way. Let's face it. She and Scott were both emotional crash sites, and they were both running scared. Fortunately when they ran, it was into each other.
For a while it seemed Shelby and Scott would live happily ever after. They would put their pasts behind them and they would build a future together on higher ground. (I couldn't resist. sorry) Nothing mattered to them except that they had found each other and they were together and that's how they had wanted it to stay.
Then that horrible day came. And that horrible phone call. Walt had gotten sick, and she was to go home at once to help around the house. They ripped her from her safe haven. From her friends....from her love.
He looked so helpless when she arrived. So innocent. If only her mother knew the things he had done to her. If she only knew the reality of it all. She looked at Walt and felt all the anger that she had almost gotten past come rushing back. She wanted to kill him with her bare hands, but she couldn't. Look at him. So helpless. He had brought her down so far and she had been down so long, all she had left was her revenge. No he had even taken her revenge. *Can't I just know why? Why me?*
Here she was waiting on him hand and foot. The man she had spent most of her life and all her good energy hating. She was responding to his every whim. She REALLY WAS acting like his little girl. She had always hated that name he gave to her and Jess. His girls. And he was constantly talking about how good it was to have both his girls back in the house.
She hated how easy it was for him. How easy to pretend nothing was happening, how easy to hurt someone so much. She didn't understand how someone could be so sick. So sick. But she would keep her promise. She would keep it to protect Jess. He could do whatever he liked to Shelby as long as Jess was safe, and she kept it a secret. Of course she had told Scott, but not another soul knew what he knew, and she trusted him to keep it that way.
Jess would come home from school as usual, but something just wasn't right. When Shelby questioned her about it, the truth all came out. The horrible, impossible, disgusting truth. Jess too. He had lied and he had broken yet another promise. Right then something inside of Shelby snapped. He last rational thought flew right out the window. Two could play at this game. He had broken his promise to leave Jess alone. She had to do something. This was her little sister. How dare he? He had gone too far. She picked up the phone, and called the police and in one incredibly relieving moment, her struggle within was over.
"No more hate. No more anger. Just some justice." She said as they pushed him into the back of the police cruiser. Her family stood outside and watched as the horror that had filled their lives for so many years was taken and locked away. They listened as the sound of sirens grew fainter, and so did the memories of so many nights that she listened for the sound of that creaking door and waited for the pain of having someone she thought she loved do nothing but hurt her. She put an arm around her sister and tried to wipe away all those memories, but she wouldn't. And she knew she wouldn't. They were a part of her, a part of who she had become. They were her past, but they were NOT her future.
She had gone back to Horizon to finish what she had started. Finding herself. And finding Scott.
Now as she lay here in her husband's arms watching her children play in the yard, she knew what her purpose in life was. She would take all those painful memories, all the hurt, and all the hate, and she would be better than them. All her life she heard what she was capable of, now she was proving it. She had taken up dancing again and was making a successful career. She had looked into Scott's eyes when she had gotten back to Horizon, and she had seen her future. Though she would never admit it to anyone, it was then that she knew she was going to marry him.
She acted upon her dreams and she was living the life she had always wanted. Sometimes she wondered if she was a good mother to her two girls, but then she remembered her own mother....who had known all along about what her stepfather was doing.....and knew she was doing alright. Her girls had everything they needed and most of what they wanted, but most of all, they had love. They were smothered with love. In a way Shelby was making up for lost time. Any way you put it, she ad dreamed her future and then she had built her future. She knew someday her daughters would ask about grandma and grandpa, and she would tell them in time. There would be no secrets in their family. Scott and Shelby had agreed on that. Secrets were lethal, and yes, her girls would know every detail of mommy and daddy's pasts.
They would know about every battle in the war they had fought. The war she had fought for so long. She never really thought of it as war, but that's exactly what it was. War with her family, war with Walt, war with herself. She had been fighting it for years. She had even considered going beck to that inner city house and having it out with her stepfather, but she had stopped herself * No. It's time to sign the peace treaty. * she thought*Time to stop the pain *
The fierce sun relaxed around her as she snuggled closer to Scott. It turned soft and golden and it warmed her shoulders, her face, her heart. She had a thousand questions, but there weren't a thousand answers. There's only one. You do have to keep being the good guy. She used the truth to set her free that night she had him arrested, and she may not have found a way to erase all the hurt he had caused in her life, but she had found her family that night, she had found the right thing to do. She had found her way home.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Did that totally suck? Probably. I dunno...I wrote some while I was sick and some in science to keep me from falling asleep to Coach Haws droning on about the force of gravity on an object that has an MA of blah blah blah blah, BLAH!