Crash and Burn: The
Possibility of Death
Disclaimer: I don't,
nor I ever will, own the characters written in this story. They are the creation of Kevin Williamson
and belong to him as well as Columbia Tristar and the WB. I did not kidnap them and hold them for
ransom. Get real! This is not Air Force One! One more thing, the song "Crash and Burn" is
the brilliant work of Savage Garden.
Author's Note: It's
my first attempt at writing fanfic, so if you cannot prevent yourself from
either breaking out in hysterical laughter or tears, can you please at least
tell me what you think?
When you feel all alone
And the world has turned its back on you
Give me a moment please to tame your wild, wild heart
I know you feel like the walls are closing in on you
It's hard to find relief and people can be so cold
When darkness is upon your door
And you feel like you can't talk anymore
Let me be the one you call
If you jump I'll break your fall
Lift you up into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash and burn
You're not alone
At first it was just pure
shock. I had no idea that I could be
one of them. Actually, it is quite
naïve of me to think that I wouldn't be one of them considering that my mother
was also a victim of this disease. Now
I will be one of them too – a statistic.
I still remember the day that
changed my life forever. Jack had just
gone to work and I had just woken up.
It had only been a year since Dawson's death and Jack knew it. He knew that I would remember, just like I
remembered my mother's passing. He knew
that I wasn't over it, nor shall I ever be entirely over it, so he gave me the
time and the space to cope.
Jack and I were…or rather, are…the
best of friends. Ever since Dawson had
died, Jack has been living with me. We
were the poster couple for the Will and Grace's of the world. Initially, it was only a temporary
situation. Jack hadn't intended to stay
with me for more than a year, but I wanted him to stay with me. I didn't know why, but for the second time
in my life, the first being Dawson, I felt like I was a home when I was with
him.
That morning when he left for work,
I was in the shower, trying to wash away all of the pain, all of the
anger. It was as if the more I thought
about it, the more it hurt. And it was
then when I felt it – a hard, painless mass that bore irregular edges. That was when it hit. Everything went black.
Jack found me on the floor of the
shower with the water still running.
Apparently he had called several times due to the fact that I hadn't
gone to work that morning. He was so
worried that he stopped by the apartment during the lunch hour. When he saw me on the floor he frantically
tried to wake me and when he did, an immediate look of concern registered on
his face. "What happened?" he asked me
as he wrapped a robe around me and helped me on the couch. Not a single word escaped from my shivering
body. "You're trembling Jo, tell me
what happened."
"Did you know that it took us
exactly thirty seven minutes to get to the hospital from my mother's grave?" I
said.
"What?" he asked me perplexed at my
sudden comment within regards to Dawson's death.
"Dawson didn't see the other guy
and before we knew it he was lying on his deathbed. A result of a hit-and-run," I rambled on. "Ironic isn't it? That of all days, today is the day that I find out I might suffer
the same fate of my mother. The
anniversary of my mother's and Dawson's death." Jack put his arm around me and I continued. "I'm sick Jack, I know it. It serves me right, doesn't it? Just when the too tall girl down the creek
has regained some sort of order in her life that she finds a lump on her
breast." That was all it took for me to
completely break down in Jack's arms.
"Shh, shh, it's okay Jo. Everything's going to be all right," Jack
replied. "You don't know for sure that
it's anything anyway. It could just be
some sort of bizarre mosquito bite for all we know, okay? Everything will be just fine."
"How do you know Jack? I mean, how can I be sure that I'm not dying
right this instant? That I could be
walking the fine line between life and death?
Huh? How do you know?" By the time I got those words out, I was
shouting at him and punching him.
"Jo, calm down. Shh, shh, we don't know…yet, that is. And we won't know for sure until we check it
out." He took me in his comforting arms
and held me until I was ready to let go.
"We'll call the doctor right now, okay?
Whatever happens, I'm here. You're not alone." And that was it. Just one
simple phone call and my life turned into one whirlwind roller coaster ride.
