Written by Benoit Goudreault-Emond
8. --That turns into a nightmare.
Being the closest town, Mideel was chosen as the place where Aeris would recover. It had changed considerably since AVALANCHE's last visit. First, it had moved west of its original spot. Obviously, they couldn't rebuild the city where the Lifestream had erupted. The new Mideel had pretty much the same layout, minus the bridge over the entrance of the town. The local merchants had finally rebuilt their stocks, and the hospital was there, as before. Cloud walked to the latter, carrying Aeris in his arms, his friends following. He pushed the door with his foot and entered.
"You again?" said the doctor, who was presently sorting bottles on a shelf. He frowned. "And who is this young lady?"
"This young lady, Doc, is Aeris, the last of the Cetra," answered Cloud. The doctor's eyes got wide. "Or at least, she will be, as long as you make sure she stays alive," Cloud amended.
"Put her on this table," said the physician, all business now. Cloud complied. The doctor quickly ascertained her condition, checking her breathing, heartbeat and blood pressure. He turned to Cloud and the other AVALANCHE members, looking relieved. "She's suffering from extreme fatigue, but it's nothing a night's rest won't fix."
There was a collective sigh of relief at the news.
"But if she's to get any sleep," the physician added, "you'll all have to leave. So, everybody out!"
"You'll tell us if there's anything new?" Reeve asked anxiously.
"Yes, yes, yes," the doctor assured. "Now, out!"
Most AVALANCHE members had taken off, invading the Materia shop. Although they knew they wouldn't find mastered Orbs, it was still better than nothing.
Cloud, however, had decided to pass on the shopping spree. He didn't want to prepare for a battle now. He didn't want to think of the Shinra. For the first time in years, he felt truly, completely at peace. He didn't want to spoil that feeling. So, he just sat on a hill overlooking the village, admiring the sunset. Mideel being in the southern hemisphere, it was summer here, while it was winter in Corel. The summer's sun looked gorgeous, setting the whole sky aflame in oranges and purples. After looking at the sunset for a while, he turned to the village, glancing down. He saw Tifa, looking very small from his high point of view, as she emerged from the Materia shop. He waved. She looked up and waved back. She walked up the hill and joined him. He motioned her to come closer and sit beside him. She did, looking uncomfortable for some reason. Cloud paid no attention.
"Now, that is a nice view," he said, enjoying the last few minutes of sunshine. Tifa did not reply.
"How did the shopping go?" Cloud asked her.
"Okay, I guess," she replied wearily. "They don't have anything powerful, but it will have to do, I suppose."
"I'm not really worried," Cloud stated.
"Well, I am," Tifa snapped. "That big machine back in the Nibelheim reactor gave us a hell of a time," she pointed out.
Cloud shrugged. "Y'know, when I fought that thing, I was too tired to cast anything but the weakest Bolt spell," Cloud confessed. "I still managed to vanquish it rather easily. If you had had that Orb, you could have done the same. Keep in mind that every enemy, monster or machine, has a weakness."
"That's true enough," admitted Tifa. "Still..." she trailed off.
"Tifa," Cloud said sternly. Tifa turned to him. "It's not the first time we've faced ridiculous odds," he pointed out. "This time, they are better than usual. But you're worried, something I've never seen you being before. What, exactly, is making you uneasy?"
Tifa hesitated. What is it with me, anyway? she wondered. I haven't felt like this since... since when? Since Cait Sith gave us that damn fortune saying how she and Cloud were compatible, she finally realized. The memory tasted bitter.
"I'm afraid of losing you," she whispered unintentionally.
Cloud patted her arm. "Don't worry about me. I may not have gotten much sleep lately, but I'm sure I'll get some tonight," he assured her, misunderstanding her meaning.
She smiled sadly at him. He means well, she thought, but he just hasn't a clue. I guess he won't until I manage to steel myself and say something. But now, it's too late, isn't it? Aeris is back with us...
Oblivious to Tifa's growing sadness, Cloud looked up. "Look at the stars," he said in an awed whisper. "So many of them!"
Tifa looked up as well. The sun had completely set, so stars were easily visible. They seemed particularly beautiful that night, and despite herself, Tifa was moved by the sight.
"Y'know, all these years, I've looked at them and wondered why they are there, what they are for," said Cloud after some time of silent stargazing. "Cid tells me they are just like our own sun, and that there may be planets around them. Are there people like us out there? Do they have the same hopes, the same dreams? Do they understand their Planet better than we understand ours?"
"How will we ever know?" asked Tifa. "Cid told me the closest star is so far, light takes years to travel there. Imagine how long a rocket would take!"
"There may be more than one way to get there," Cloud speculated.
Tifa could feel her mood lift despite herself. "Since when did you become so philosophically inclined?" she teased.
Cloud laughed, then looked at her, mirth in his eyes. "Scary, huh? I don't know why I feel that way tonight. All I know is that, for the first time in more than seven years, I feel at peace."
"Even with the Shinra around?" asked Tifa.
"Even with the Shinra around," admitted Cloud. "I don't like the idea of them starting up that reactor, but we can probably convince them to shut it down again. I'm not too worried."
They both stayed silent for a long time. Finally, Tifa stirred. "Maybe we should turn in for the night," she ventured.
Cloud suddenly realized how tired he felt. He yawned, stretched, and nodded. "You're right. I should be sleeping already," he admitted.
"Then, why are you still here?" admonished Tifa.
"It's silly, but I'm afraid I'll lose that incredible feeling of peace if I go to sleep," Cloud explained. "I don't know whether I'll still feel like that tomorrow morning."
What can I say to that? wondered Tifa. "Well, you'll have to go to sleep eventually anyway, won't you?" she said aloud. "Why not do it now?"
Cloud sighed. "You're right again." He got to his feet, and pointed to a squat building in the village. "That's the inn, right? Do you think they'll have enough rooms this time?" he said with an impish grin.
"Oh, I made sure beforehand. They do," answered Tifa immediately.
"Good. I don't think I'll have a nightmare again, but if I do, at least I won't wake you up this time," said Cloud.
"Well, thank you, Cloud. For caring, I mean. That's very sweet," said Tifa gently.
"Hmph," replied Cloud. He was more comfortable being the tough guy than the sweet friend. He offered his hand to Tifa, who gladly took it. He pulled her to her feet. She dusted herself, and was about to start down the hill when Cloud gave her a grin. "Race you to the inn!" he said, breaking into a dead run. She laughed, scrambling to pass him. He managed to make it to the door before her, but barely. Once inside, they both caught their breath, giggling like young children.
"Well, that was a fun end to an eventful day!" said Cloud. He yawned again. "I'm pooped! I'm hitting the mattress."
"Well... Good night, Cloud," said Tifa.
"Good night, Tifa. Sweet dreams," said Cloud. They both left for their respective room.
Best night of sleep Cloud had had in about ten years.
Cloud woke up, feeling great, dressed and walked downstairs to the inn's bar. He was hoping to meet Aeris on a full stomach. His wish would not be granted.
The other members of AVALANCHE were all crammed around a single table in the bar. Everyone's attention seemed to be focused on a single person, but Cloud couldn't tell who it was, as Barret's bulk was blocking the view. Tifa saw Cloud come down the stairs and beckoned him, grinning. Barret turned around on his seat.
"Yo, Spike!" he bellowed. "Look who's here, fresh out of the hospital!" with that, he moved to the side, letting Cloud see who he was talking about.
A young lady clad in a pink dress rose from her chair, smiling demurly. Her brilliant green eyes made it impossible to mistake her for somebody else.
"Aeris!" Cloud cried joyfully. He ran to her and hugged her tightly. "Don't do something like that to me again," he whispered in her ear. "Just don't. Ever."
"I won't," she promised. "But please--don't squeeze so tight!" she breathed.
"Oh! Sorry," Cloud apologized. He let her go and stood at arm's length. "It's so great to see you again! I hadn't realized how much I missed you!"
"I missed you too," said Aeris softly. "I missed all of you," she amended, more loudly. "I was so lonely in the Lifestream..."
"Was there anyone you knew there?" asked Nanaki.
"Oh, yes!" replied Aeris. "There was mother, and Zack... But I realized how little I had known both of them, compared to all of you."
"Aeris," interrupted Vincent gravely. The young woman turned to him. "Did we do the right thing by bringing you back? Weren't you happier in there than here?"
Aeris shook her head. "No, Vincent. You all did the right thing. I am happier to be here among friends, than I was in there." She smiled. "Afterlife is rather... overrated, I'm afraid."
"Or maybe you cannot remember all of it," speculated Nanaki idly. "It may not be possible to map what you experienced to human sensorial memories."
Everyone gave him a blank stare. "Huh? In English, Red!" said Barret, reflecting everybody's thoughts at that time.
"Ahem," grunted Nanaki. "More simply, since human memory is largely tied to human senses, it may be that what she felt in the Lifestream cannot be translated to a form the human brain understands."
"That's a rather long-winded explanation just to say that I'm happy to be here!" said Aeris, laughing. "You haven't changed much, Nanaki. Always so cerebral," she teased, scratching the beast behind his right ear. Nanaki purred unintentionally, as his kind always did when scratched right on that spot.
"Do you think anybody has changed much in the two years you were... er..." Reeve said, stumbling on the last word.
"Dead?" Aeris offered, smiling sweetly at him.
"Uh, yeah," replied Reeve. He was cringing just from thinking about it, but Aeris seemed to take it in a rather matter-of-fact way.
"You've all grown so much, become so powerful... And still, I---" she stopped in mid-sentence. She blanched, her smile vanishing. Her eyes rolled up, and she fainted. Cloud barely managed to catch her.
"Aeris!" he screamed, anguished. The others gasped at the unexpected turn of events. After a short wait that seemed to go on forever to Cloud, she opened her eyes. However, she was not looking at her friends. She was looking very far away, beyond the inn's ceiling, towards something only she could see.
"I'm all right... But the Planet... Someone's hurting the Planet..." she said, voice full of pain.
Upon hearing this, Reeve immediately dialed a number on his cell phone. He spoke a series of words in the microphone that sounded like some sort of code. He listened intently for a couple of minutes. When he hung up, Cloud had made Aeris sit down, and Tifa was fetching the doctor. Reeve walked to the others, face grim.
"It's the Shinra," he said somberly. "They've started the number one reactor."
"But they had all eight running three years ago, and she never fainted from that!" protested Cid.
"Aeris, are you all right?" asked Cloud. He was very worried.
"No," she replied simply, a sad smile on her lips. "I'm unhurt, but nothing is right." She looked at Cloud straight in the eye and grasped his left arm hard, almost painfully so. "Cloud... I'm going to do something terrible. I can't help it. I can't stop it." She closed her eyes and grimaced. Her voice had a pleading quality Cloud had never heard from her. She opened her eyes, and when Cloud looked in them, he could almost physically touch her sadness and determination. "You must kill me," she concluded in a whisper.
Cloud's reaction was immediate. He shrank back in horror. "How can you ask me to do that?" he said, nearly screaming. "Why do you want to die again?"
"I don't," she said, incredible sadness in her voice. "But I must. If I live, countless innocents will lose their lives. As long as that reactor is running, everyone is in danger."
"We're going to stop that reactor," asserted Cloud.
"I don't know if I can hold on much longer..." said Aeris. Then, she started to cry, silently, tears rolling down her cheeks.
"Then we'll go immediately," Cloud commanded. He looked up at his friends. "Let's prep the airship. Someone must stay with her, and that someone can't be me."
Everyone gave him a puzzled look from his last statement. Then, Tifa suddenly understood. "Your dreams..." she said, not daring to say more.
Cloud nodded. Tifa noticed his face was very pale. "If she asks me to kill her again, I don't know whether I'll..." he trailed off, not daring to say more either.
"Go," Tifa whispered, taking Aeris from his arms. "I'll stay."
Looking immensely relieved, Cloud turned around and ran out. Still looking puzzled, all except Barret followed. Barret just stood there, looking at Tifa, his long time friend, his expression unreadable. Tifa raised an eyebrow quizzically.
"I don't like leaving you alone with her," he said, answering her unasked question. "She doesn't look very stable. And I have a bad feeling about all this..."
"Aw, come on, Barret!" Tifa interrupted. "Look at her! She can barely stand up!"
"I guess you're right," conceded Barret. He nodded, silently urging her to take care of herself, and strode out.
Tifa crouched next to Aeris. The Cetra was still sobbing quietly. Tifa smoothed her hair tenderly, almost as a sister would. "What terrible thing will happen if you live?" she asked softly.
Aeris made a visible effort to stop crying. "I don't know!" she said. Her body was shaken by a violent sob, almost like a hiccup. "But all of Midgar would pay," she continued.
"Can't you stop it?" asked Tifa.
Aeris should her head vehemently. "No! I don't think I can stop myself from doing it! I'm too weak---"
"You're the strongest willed person I know, Aeris," Tifa interrupted. "How can you be too weak to---"
Aeris cut her off. "You don't understand!" she screamed. She had been speaking softly until then, and Tifa jumped at the change. Not only in volume, but in pitch, as her voice became almost shrill, hysteric. "I can't fight several thousand souls! Nobody can!"
With that, she made a grab at Tifa's wrist and, before the other woman could react, she managed to pop a Materia orb out of one of Tifa's holders. She got up, jumping away from a surprised Tifa, and started to chant in a strange language, holding the Materia in front of her.
Tifa, startled at first, quickly realized Aeris had snapped. She moved in, ready to hit Aeris on the side of her head. Poor girl, she thought. I must take care not to hurt her. Tifa aimed her blow carefully, wanting to stun her while doing as little harm as possible.
She never even got the chance to throw her fist forward.
Outside the inn, a very loud explosion was heard. Everyone was busy refueling the Highwind, but upon hearing a loud noise coming from the inn's general direction, they all turned, and froze in front of the tableau. The building that had been the inn in which they had spent the night was presently a pile of charred wood. Out of the rubble walked a pink clad figure. Reeve gasped, recognizing Aeris immediately. Not looking at her friends, she ran a couple of meters and then actually took off, flying towards the Lifestream crater near Mideel.
Cloud was the first to snap out of it. "NO!" he screamed. He ran faster than he ever had before towards the remains of the inn. Nanaki was next to react, and despite his superior running speed, he had to push himself to catch up with the running man. As he was running, Nanaki readied some Restore Materia, fearing the worse. The others followed, running as fast as they could, but they were left behind very quickly.
Cloud reached the charred rubble that had once been the inn. He started sifting through the burnt wood, looking for Tifa. He finally found her, face soot-streaked, the whole left side of her face covered with blood, her clothes almost destroyed. Her breathing was labored. Nanaki quickly sat next to her and cast Cure several times, grimacing from the effort. Tifa's wounds closed and her breathing became peaceful. Cloud held her hand in a tight grip, murmuring nonsense phrase like "what have I done" and "it's all my fault again." His eyes were moist and he seemed on the verge of crying. Be strong, Cloud, Nanaki thought. We need you able if we are to stop this insanity, whatever it is!
Finally, as the rest of AVALANCHE managed to join Cloud and Nanaki, Tifa opened her eyes. Her face was very pale under the soot, but her eyes looked as alive as ever. Seeing this, Cloud shouted in joy and hugged her tight, laughing and crying at the same time from the relief he felt. Still dazed from her ordeal, Tifa hugged him back, enjoying the feeling of his hard, warm body pressing against hers. I'm alive, she thought. I really thought my time had come. I guess I'm tougher than I give myself credit for, she speculated.
"Don't scare me like that," Cloud whispered in Tifa's ear. Then, relaxing his grip, he quickly checked whether glass shards had found their way under her skin. Luckily, she had been far from any window when the explosion had occurred. However, while checking for wounds, Cloud suddenly realized that what was left of Tifa's clothes were barely covering her. He blushed and looked away.
"What is it?" asked Tifa.
"Let's just say your clothes ain't what they used to be," mumbled Cloud, still trying very hard not to look at her.
Tifa looked down and saw what he meant. Then, she did something unexpected.
She laughed.
A clear, resonant, pure laugh. Startled, Cloud tried to get her to tell him what was so funny, but she was laughing so hard that her explanation was unintelligible. Her friends were puzzled, wondering if Tifa, like Aeris, had snapped, but eventually, her hilarity became contagious. Soon, everyone was roaring with laughter. Even Vincent was grinning.
Finally, Tifa's hilarity died down, and everyone else stopped laughing as well.
"It's just so idiotic," explained Tifa when she could speak again. "Here we are, in the middle of a disaster, with a bigger one probably awaiting us, million of lives in danger, and everyone, including me, is worried about modesty!" She made a visible effort not to laugh again. "Why are humans so silly?"
Cloud was blushing and not looking at her again. "Dunno. But weren't you the one who had Barret and I climb the stairs before you because you thought we were looking under your skirt when we stormed the Shinra building?" he pointed out.
Tifa laughed again. "Yeah... Ain't life strange?" she mused. "Poor Cloud... you're really embarrassed! Vincent, may I borrow your cape again?"
Vincent looked at her. He wasn't staring, but he was certainly not looking away either. "I know I'll regret this..." he said, unhooking his cape.
"Pervert," Tifa admonished, smiling. "C'mon, I'm begging you."
Vincent gave in and gave her his cape. She covered herself and stood. Cloud got up as well.
"Well, this is all very nice," said Barret, "but what do we do about---"
He was interrupted by a loud rumble coming from deep within the Planet. The ground shook. A huge crack opened close to the inn's remains. Everyone managed to jump away, except Cid, who lost his balance on the treacherous ground and fell in with a surprised cry. He managed to hold on to the ledge, but he could not get a solid grip as the dirt was too soft. His hands were slipping and he knew he was in for a long fall. What a shame to end up buried alive after all the shit I've been through, he thought.
But as he lost his grip, a big, dark-skinned hand grabbed his wrist. Barret, seeing Cid fall in the rift, had scrambled to the edge and rescued his friend. I won't fail Cid like I failed Dyne! was the only thought in his head as he struggled to bring Cid out. Groaning and straining, he managed to prevent Cid from tumbling down the chasm long enough for the pilot to get a fresh, solid grip and pull himself out to safety.
"Thanks," he said to Barret warmly. "What the hell was that?" he asked to no one in particular.
"Could be a simple tremor," replied Nanaki. "But somehow, I don't think so."
"Look!" Reeve yelled, pointing southward.
Straining to see through the dust lifted by the tremor, everyone eventually managed to see what Reeve was pointing. It was big, blocky. The sun's rays reflected off its metallic surface, which was of a pure gold color. Even from their quite distant point of view, they could see the glowing red eyes of the creature. It moved ponderously, walking on its two huge legs. It was headed for Midgar.
"Aw, shit!" cursed Cid.
"Is this what I think it is?" asked Barret, again to no one in particular.
"There's no doubt about it," whispered Vincent. He paused, hesitating to say it, as if it were a nightmare and saying the words would make it real.
"It is a WEAPON."
Everyone stood unmoving, silent, looking very, very grim. Everyone, that is, except Cloud, who was looking more scared than anything else. Tifa noticed and put a reassuring hand on his shoulder. He jerked away and turned towards her. She pulled her hand back, not understanding why he was acting this way.
"What's the matter?" she asked him. "We faced several of those before, and we won! We'll win again!"
Cloud shook his head. "No, it's not that. It's... When I saw you lying there, wounded, I tried to steel myself to do what I must and failed. I still wavered. You were all right, after all. But now that this thing's loose, there's no doubt in my mind. I must do it. But how can I? Why does it have to be me?"
"Stop it, Cloud!" Tifa interrupted. "You're not making any sense!"
He ignored her. "Why did she ask me? But I must do it... I owe her that much..."
"Do what?" Tifa asked him, interrupting his monologue. Cloud looked at her, profound sadness in his eyes, but also resignation and determination. She guessed his answer a split second before he said it, and hoped with all her heart that she had guessed wrong.
"Kill her."
Tifa closed her eyes in chagrin. She had guessed right.
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Benoit Goudreault-Emond April, 9 2001