Written by Benoit Goudreault-Emond
17. Bittersweet victory
Tifa's bar was rather crowded that night, despite the fact that most regulars had been kicked out by Barret.
All of AVALANCHE was there, of course. But Reeve had also invited some of the guards who had defended him and Katya when they made a run for the reactor's control room. And since he had inherited of the Turk's contract, he invited them as well, and Reno could think of no reason to refuse.
Nanaki and Reeve looked over the crowd pensively, Nanaki lying down next to the fireplace and Reeve sitting in a nearby chair. Barret, Cid, Rude and Shera (who had flown in from Rocket Town with the repaired Tiny Bronco when she heard the news) were sitting at a table in the corner, and they seemingly enjoyed themselves. The Shinra guards were all sitting at the bar, singing war songs louder and louder as they got more drunk. Elena and Reno were sitting at the bar as well, conversing quietly. Tifa was frantically trying to manage her personnel while mixing drinks to reply to the demand of the Shinra guards.
"Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to invite the guards," pointed out Nanaki, startling Reeve out of his pensive mood.
"Maybe," replied Reeve absently.
"My friend," said Nanaki, turning a compassionate eye to his friend, "is anything on your mind?"
Reeve sighed. "I don't know...Yeah, actually, I do. It's Katya. Why did she have to die? We were going to accomplish so much..." he trailed off.
Nanaki did not reply immediately. Then: "True. However, I have asked some of the guards what kind of person she was." The red beast paused, as if afraid to say anything further.
"And?" asked Reeve, annoyed.
"Well, she was ready to do a lot of things to reach the position she eventually held," replied Nanaki carefully. "Not all of them very ethical nor very honest."
"Her father's daughter," said Reeve sadly.
"Maybe," replied Nanaki. "In any case, it eventually proved to be her undoing."
"How so?" asked Reeve sharply, turning his head to Nanaki.
"Evans was her right-hand man," Nanaki explained. "The main reason for that is that he one of the few who was ready to do those unethical things for her, on the guarantee that she would give him executive power once things settled down. Evans, however, was impatient, and when he saw an opportunity to take things into his own hands, he did. He miscalculated; most guards stayed loyal to miss Shinra. But still, if Katya hadn't chosen such a ruthless aid, this wouldn't have happened. And if she hadn't formulated that contingency plan, all of Midgar wouldn't have been put in danger like this."
Reeve considered this. Then, sadly, he said, "Still, it's too bad she got killed at the moment she was trying to do good, for once. Why is life so unfair?"
"I do not know," Nanaki replied. "I may never know. It is rather unfortunate, but it may have to do with the fact that unethical people have unethical allies who do not turn ethical at the same time as they do. Unfortunate indeed, but I'm afraid there's nothing to be done about it."
Reeve said nothing for a while. Then, when he finally spoke up, he sounded very bitter. "I suppose you're right." He sighed. "I just wish I weren't the one stuck with Shinra on top of that. I refused the position once before. Now...I feel honor bound to take it up."
"I'm sure you'll do just fine, my friend," Nanaki assured him.
"Never thought I'd sit down with a Turk," muttered Barret.
Rude shrugged. "Never thought I'd be sitting with AVALANCHE, either, but here I am. Do you want me to leave?" he asked, his voice level.
"Nah," replied Cid before Barret could say anything. "You saved all of Midgar, man! You're a fucking hero!"
Shera elbowed him for his foul mouth. He just looked at her with a dumb expression. She tried to look stern, but it didn't suit her at all. Cid laughed at her expression.
"Well, that's good," replied Rude. "Because I'm leaving the Turks."
That shocked everybody at the table.
"Why?" Barret finally managed to ask.
Rude shrugged. "Don't know. I'm a professional, but I have some standards. Ever since we dropped the Sector 7 plate, I found the job stank more and more. I stayed because Reno was my friend, because being a Turk had a certain prestige, and because of loyalty. But now, Reno is growing more and more distant, Elena doesn't speak to anyone and being a Turk doesn't mean much anymore. As for loyalty, since Reeve is the new boss of the Turks, they'll mostly follow AVALANCHE around doing odd jobs. So I thought I might as well just join AVALANCHE and make the thing official."
More stunned silence. Everyone waited for Rude to say something else. However, the bald man did not seem inclined to say anything further, especially since this was probably the longest stretch of talking he had done in a long time.
Cid finally broke the silence. "Uh...Well...I'll have to ask Cloud and Tifa, but it's OK by me, man. Welcome aboard!" The pilot presented his hand to the ex-Turk, who shook it firmly.
"Hey! Don't I get a say in this?" complained Barret. "I'm the one who founded AVALANCHE, dammit!"
"So, say something!" snapped Cid in mock annoyance.
"I'm not sure it's a good idea, that's what I say!" he replied, oblivious to Cid's sarcasm. "The Turks brought down the plate, dammit!"
"You blew up the reactor," replied Rude calmly. There was no reproach in his voice; it was strictly factual.
Barret gave Rude a look and shut up. Finally, he sighed. "Yeah, you're right. No use holding grudges over what was done during a war. Besides, you let us pass when we raided Midgar to stop Hojo, so you can't be all that bad." He sighed again. "All right, if it's OK with the others, it's fine by me. Welcome to AVALANCHE."
They shook hands.
Cid grinned.
Shera leaned towards the pilot and whispered in his ear. "Cid, the diplomat. I've seen it all," she giggled.
"Very funny," replied the pilot gruffly. But he kept his grin.
"Could I speak to you in private?" Shera asked him, her tone serious once more.
Cid looked at Barret and Rude. They seemed to have a conversation going, with Barret doing most of the talking. Cid stood. "If you'll excuse us, we'll let you two hit it off and talk elsewhere," he said.
"We're not hitting it off, Highwind," replied Barret testily.
"Right, Wallace," shot back Cid skeptically. Shera took his hand and dragged him off to the corner of the bar. There, she looked into his eyes, and her boldness evaporated. She looked down, embarrassed.
"Hey, Shera, what's up with you?" asked Cid. She looked up, to see his eyes filled with concern.
"I was worried," she said simply.
"Well, yeah, sorry I didn't call, but things got kind of hectic," apologized Cid.
"It only takes five minutes to call, Cid. I'd appreciate it if..."
"All right, I get the message!" snapped Cid. "Geez, who are you now, my mom?"
"I just care a lot about you," Shera replied softly.
Cid's expression softened. "I care about you too, y'know," he said with a slight smile.
Reno emptied his tenth glass of whatever it was Tifa was mixing. Elena amused herself by imagining that it was filled with all kinds of poison, but she had to admit the bar hostess knew her stuff. The drinks were first class. She downed her second one as Reno emptied half of his eleventh.
"Hey," she said, touching Reno's arm. "Lay off a bit!"
"Who asked you?" replied Reno with a slur in his voice. But he slowed down a bit, nevertheless.
Elena looked at him with compassion in her eyes. "Look, I know you're pissed off Rude left---"
Reno silenced her with a look. "You don't know anything, Elena," he said grimly.
"So, enlighten me, dammit!" Elena snapped back.
Reno just looked at her for a moment. Finally, he spoke, his slur all but gone. "I've known Rude since we were kids. He was my best friend. We did all kinds of things together, although he's quite older than I am. We'd read the papers about the success of the SOLDIER program, and found it impressive. But what fascinated Rude was the Turks and their code of conduct. He wanted such a life so badly, I think it almost hurt him at times. When he joined, I followed; he had been my friend, he had always looked out for me, and, well, I felt sort of lost when he wasn't around, so I thought it was the best thing to do."
Reno paused to take another sip. "But it turned out Rude did not like it as much as he thought he would. I think he had illusions on how the Turks were. I had none. So he became good ol' reliable Rude, the model Turk, who such a great model that no one wanted to promote him. He never said anything, but I know it bothered him. I guess I shouldn't have accepted when they made me Tseng's second in command. He's been pretty distant ever since. And...I've been distant, too. I didn't know how to deal with him."
The Turk finished his drink. "I'm not pissed off, Elena. I'm angry. At myself. I drove my friend away. And of all places, he's going into AVALANCHE. Ugh."
Elena smiled sympathetically. "I know how you feel," she said.
"You don't know shit, Elena," replied Reno. He laughed. "But that's OK. I appreciate what you're trying to do." He sighed. "But now, I don't know what I'm going to do. Reeve's our boss. Damn boyscout. Maybe we should ask him to renounce the contract."
"Or maybe you could just stay with us," said a deep voice behind him.
Reno nearly jumped out of his skin. He swiveled on his stool and saw Vincent. He relaxed.
"You'll have to teach me how to sneak up like that," Reno told him. Then, he turned serious again. "And I don't think staying is such a good idea."
"Why not?" asked Vincent.
"Too much bad blood," replied Reno. "Me in sector seven. Cloud in the temple of the Ancients."
Vincent shrugged. "With time, you'll all forget your resentment."
"Not likely," snapped Elena.
Vincent just looked at her.
"You're not here to give us a recruiting speech, I'll bet," said Reno.
"As a matter of fact, I'm not," replied Vincent. "I'm wondering whether you know some things on Hojo."
"Depends," replied Reno carefully. "What things?"
"What, exactly, he did to me," said Vincent, his voice a mere whisper.
Reno scowled, concentrating. Then: "Nope."
Vincent stared at him. "Are you absolutely sure?"
"Tseng may have known something," amended Reno. "But you can hardly ask him now, can you?" At that, Elena flinched somewhat, but quickly regained her composure.
Vincent stared at him some more. Then, he nodded slowly and, without a word, turned and walked away.
"Hey!" called Elena, surprising everyone. "You asked us to join AVALANCHE..."
Vincent swiveled and stared at her.
"But how come you, an ex-Turk, joined them in the first place?" she asked.
"Because things change," replied Vincent. Then, he left, silently.
Elena and Reno swiveled back to the bar. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Elena wondered aloud.
"No idea," replied Reno. But he had hesitated before saying it.
"Can't this wait? There are things I must do," Aeris asked, somewhat impatiently.
"Nope," Yuffie replied, dragging Aeris forward by her wrist. "Trust me, you'll like it. It's the least I can do, after you recovered all my Materia from that yucky place!"
"Our Materia," corrected Aeris before she could help herself. She knew, though, that it was useless to try to get that fact in Yuffie's head.
"My Materia," insisted Yuffie. "Reeve said it will be fine as soon as the dead Mako has been washed off, so I thought I'd do something for you."
They climbed down the stairs and got to one of the bedrooms in the basement. Smiling mischievously, Yuffie opened the door and, with a theatrical sweep of her arm, motioned Aeris inside. Aeris sighed and, shaking her head, complied.
Inside the room stood her adoptive mother, Elmyra.
Their reaction was mutual and unhesitant: they ran into one another's embrace, laughing and crying at the same time. They both tried to speak at the same time as well, neither of them being really coherent. Yuffie tried to insert herself in the conversation, without success; mother and daughter were totally oblivious to her.
The young ninja decided to leave them alone. She tip-toed out of the room and closed the door silently, leaving the two women alone.
That was oh so noble of me, she mused as she climbed back up to the bar. Cloud's probably right. I'm growing up, whatever I do. She wiped a tear from her eyes. She had to admit to herself that the reunion had moved her. Geez, I'm even getting soft!
She looked down at her right hand, where she held a single Materia orb. She had liberated it from Aeris' wrist holder as she was dragging her down the corridor. Then again, maybe not, she thought, snickering silently.
Cloud was sitting outside, a mug of very hot and very spiked coffee between his hands. He took a sip, looking at the gorgeous, cloudless sky, thinking of nothing in particular. He had tried to mingle with the guests, without much success; something nagged him, and he just couldn't seem to relax. He had tried to help Tifa, but she had wanted none of that and kicked him out of the kitchen. He had to admit that he probably would have been more hindrance than help. So, he put on a coat, went out, and sat at one of the tables Tifa had gotten for next summer.
Cloud looked at the stars, something he had done countless times. He tried to distinguish the constellations. The Whale, as usual, dominated the winter sky. The Penguin, its usual companion, seemed to look down at Cloud and laugh at him. Cloud smiled at the image. Stars laughing at him! Well, maybe they truly were.
The door behind him opened, letting the raucous signing from the Shinra guards out into the quiet winter night. The door closed a short time after, muffling the singing. Cloud heard the sound of snow creaking as someone walked towards him. He turned, and was mildly surprised to see Tifa in a short blue winter coat with AVALANCHE stenciled on the left breastpocket. Coats like that had started to appear over the past two years as news of AVALANCHE's amazing victory spread. Almost nobody believed the story, but it sold relatively well, and some guy had bought the rights to use the name from Barret and was now making coats.
Cloud suddenly noticed he was staring at Tifa as she was coming closer. This coat suits her, he thought. She's really pretty in it. He pushed the thought out of his mind and smiled at her as she sat down next to him.
"Are the guards done drinking?" he asked her. "They still sound awfully drunk!"
Tifa smiled back mischievously. "Yup. They're so drunk they didn't even notice when I started giving them tap water instead of drinks! I think they've had enough, anyways."
Cloud chuckled. "I'm sure you're right."
They both stayed silent for a while, the only sound being the wind over the town's snowy streets.
"So...what are you doing outside?" asked Tifa after some time.
Cloud shrugged. "Dunno. I know we've won, although the price was high. We've brought Aeris back. Shinra will never be a problem again. And yet..." He hesitated.
"And yet what?"
"Well, for starters, I'd like to speak to Aeris a bit," Cloud replied. He didn't notice, but Tifa tensed at that. "I've missed her a lot...But I couldn't find her anywhere. I know Yuffie's reunited her with Elmyra. Elmyra's inside, chatting with Barret. But where is her daughter?"
"Maybe she needed time alone?" suggested Tifa.
"I suppose," sighed Cloud. "But there's other stuff bothering me."
"Such as?" Tifa asked, surprised. She had been thinking just now how Aeris' presence or absence seemed to take all his attention.
"Well, those cyborgs, for one," replied Cloud. "Reeve tells me there's no way Shinra could be behind this. So, there's a maniac somewhere doing them. Where?
"Then, there's that man in the white cloak you met, as well as my own...loss of control..."---Cloud spoke those three words with immense self-loathing---"back at the Lifestream. And Aeris had been acting pretty weird when she went ballistic. Why in the world did she try to kill you? She could have just flown away, and there's no way you could have stopped her!"
Jealousy? But why would she be jealous? She's the one who manages to get his attention, not me! And she never seemed to be really worried two years ago... she thought bitterly. She pushed that out of her mind. I'm paranoid, she decided. We've always been very good friends. Aloud, she said, "I have no idea."
"Are you sure?" Cloud probed. "What happened in her mind, exactly?"
"I'm already having trouble remembering what happened, I'm afraid," Tifa confessed. She remained silent for a moment, thinking. Then, she gave up, shaking her head. "I don't remember anything that would explain it."
Cloud considered this. "I don't like this," he muttered.
"Neither do I," added Tifa.
Cloud sighed. "Well, I suppose we'll come to that bridge when we cross it!" He stood up. "What do you say we rejoin the living?" he suggested with a smile.
"The living? Who are those?" replied Tifa, intentionally pretending not to understand.
"Those blokes inside the bar, who else?" replied Cloud, deadpan.
"They? Living? You're joking, right?" said Tifa with a grin.
"Well, whoever," replied Cloud dismissively. "Shall we go in?"
Tifa got up as well, and, side by side, they made their way back to the bar. The guards inside were quite a bit more subdued now. Most of them had fallen from exhaustion, and some were even snoring. Their friends looked up, greeting both of them. Elmyra was sitting alone in a table in the back corner. She beckoned them both.
They sat down on the other side of the table. "So, glad to be reunited with your daughter?" Cloud opened.
"More than words can express," replied Elmyra, sighing contentedly. "Thank you, Cloud, for pushing everyone to bring her back. And Tifa, thank you for saving her from that maniac!"
"Hey!" protested Cloud while the two women laughed at his expense.
When the laughter died down, Tifa leaned forward. "Where is Aeris, anyway?" she asked.
Elmyra looked sad. "She left."
Cloud and Tifa said nothing, stunned. Elmyra continued. "She said she had something to take care of, and that she had to be alone to do it. She asked me to give this to both of you," she said, sliding a sealed envelope across the table to Cloud.
Cloud frowned, took the envelope, unsealed it, and read the letter inside. His frowned got deeper and deeper as he read further. When he finished reading, he blanched.
"What is it, Cloud?" asked Tifa, worried.
Without words, Cloud just offered her the letter. Tifa read:
Cloud, Tifa,Tifa remained silent for a long time. "Did she tell you anything more?" she finally asked Elmyra.I'm sorry I left like this without saying goodbye, but I did not want my resolve to weaken. I knew that if I saw my two dearest friends, I would not have the strength. You would have insisted to come with me, and I would not have been able to say no.
Tifa, you saved my sanity, and for this, you have my eternal gratitude. Despite your efforts, I still feel a...a pull, I suppose, is the best way to express it. A compulsion. Yes, that's better. There is something I must do, for the good of the whole Planet. To make sure Meteor can never threaten us again. Don't worry, Cloud, I don't intend to get myself killed this time!
I don't know how long I'll be gone.
I wish I could tell you more. Tifa, you were right earlier. I have changed. I don't know how, or why, but I don't feel the confidence I always felt before that everything would turn out to be all right. I also feel there are things I must keep from all of you. Those feelings are all new to me. I don't know how to deal with them.
I most dearly hope that by withholding my knowledge, I'm not endangering any of you. That is partly why I feel I must do this alone. If you do not come with me, you cannot be hurt. If you came with me, I'd have to tell you things...that I'd rather not tell. Not yet.
I'm probably not making much sense. In any case, I'll be gone for a little bit. I hope you're not too sad. Please, do not follow me. I know that I can do this.
Please take care of one another.
Aeris.
"She didn't tell me much," the older woman replied.
"And you let her go?" asked Cloud, frowning.
"You know Aeris, Cloud...she'd have found a way to do what she wants, whatever I'd do," Elmyra answered.
It was Cloud's turn to remain silent. Then, he turned to Tifa. "What do you think this is all about?"
Tifa looked down at the tabletop. "Well, I can think of two things. One, she's gone totally bonkers. I'd be very surprised if this were the case."
"And two?"
Tifa sighed. "Two, she's still under the influence of those Ancients I thought I had kicked out of her mind. I don't know how, or why. But that's probably the voices she's hearing."
Cloud stared at her, tense. "I think I like the first hypothesis better, Tifa," he stated in a low voice.
Tifa looked up. "Well, if the second one is true, I suppose we'll know soon enough, won't we?"
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Benoit Goudreault-Emond April, 9 2001