by,
Ash C.
e-mail- ash1107@hotmail.com
please no flames or spams
Chapter 4
Dilandau walked away from Hitomi's trembling form. Her eyes were dilated and wide open, almost as if she was in a state of shock. He walked over to a small table that was faintly lighted with a kerosene lamp. Picking up a small towel, he wiped his sweaty brow and smiled. All was going according to plan and soon, very soon he would have to put the next part in action. He glanced back at Hitomi's wretched form, her fingers were slightly twitching, her mouth agape, and she slowly blinked. Ah, so there was still some life in her yet…
Hitomi was engulfed in a world of darkness, while trying to shut out the terrible things being done to her she created a mental wall. Some place to block out all the hurt. Finally she could rest, nothing could ever hurt her anymore, she was so tired. Closing her eyes she let herself fall into the nothingness. A pitch-black sanctuary. She waited for the darkness to totally take her but something held her back. She couldn't figure it out so she re-evaluated everything. Earth, the beautiful planet that hangs in the sky next to the moon. I was born there and all my ties restrict me from fully loving Gaia. I miss Yukari, Amano, and my parents. She paused expecting to cry, or something… but nothing happened. This puzzled her. Gaia, the mysterious planet of my youth, everything here is so primitive yet advanced. I can't help but think what did we miss? Why? The question lingered but held no tie. Van… A sharp blast of truth hit her and finally for once she saw clearly, past her own self-pity… I still love him so much… and if I left, again, I would cause him so much pain. I still see the question in his eyes. Those crimson eyes, blood red from the innocence, the beautiful innocence we lost in the war. The question that lingers on the tip of his tongue everyday. But, I can, no, could never answer it because I still don't know why. If she wasn't in her mind a tear would have fallen but, the knowledge stung and scorched her. Hitomi looked ahead, finally she knew her mission. She had to find a reason to live. Hesitantly she broke down the walls and returned to her body. Hitomi blinked a few times then trembled. She felt wrong. Dilandau did something no man should've ever done to her. He wronged her in the worst way possible. The memories flooded back, she let out a stiff sob, and thought about her mom.
Dilandau waited till Hitomi fell asleep before moving her into a carriage that would take her back to Austria.
Van paced around his room he was very worried about Hitomi. Merle sat on his bed quietly, watching him pace back and forth. Van felt horrible Hitomi was gone and there was nothing he could do about it. No evidence of where she could of gone and the place grounds had been searched many times over. Anger and rage seized him and he walked over to the wall and hit it, venting out all of his frustrations. The impact vibrated through his bones, and he let out a strangled sob and collapsed to the floor. Merle cautiously walked across the room and put an arm around him and leaned against him, as if to say "I'm here". Van remained impassive; he hung his head in despair. Why can't my wishes come true? I just wanted a happy life with Hitomi.., why aren't we able to live peacefully together. I could face Zaibach's giant army again without fear if she was at my side. I need her so much, she completes me…
A light sound of someone rapping on the door drew him out of his misery. Wearily he walked to the door and opened, Merle still at his side.
"What?" he sighed to the man servant outside the door.
"Queen Millerna requires your immediate presence, I believe Lady Hitomi has returned…" the Man servant looked down at the floor while talking.
Van's attention perked up at that and he burst out the door nearly pushing down the servant. A faint patter behind him told him that Merle was following. Down the corridors he ran till he reached the great hall. Millerna stood near a door and beckoned for him, her face entirely passive and serious. Van looked at her, anxiety, and worry showed in his face. Millerna recognized these emotions immediately and smiled a sad, pity type smile. Van anxiously asked,
"Millerna is she, I mean is Hitomi here?"
Millerna thought for a moment before answering, she didn't want to be the one responsible for the young King's rage. "Van, it was assumed that she was kidnapped and we still have no clues or leads who could have done it."
"This I already know" he said impatiently
"But!…she is here being taken care of our doctor's"
"what? What happened?!"
Millerna knew this was coming, the question she dreaded, she could never deliver this news to him. Nervously she answered,
"Van, we believe she was raped"
Hitomi woke to a semi-familiar world. Bright light shone through the window next to her. Her body was still sore from all the bruises, but one question remained in her mind,
"How did I escape that horrible place alive?" She lingered on the question for a while then pushed it out her mind. The whole thought of the nightmarish place made her trembled. The door directly across from her bed silently swung open and Millerna walked in.
"Hitomi" she said cautiously.
Hitomi looked up into the older woman's eyes. They were filled with worry. "Yes?" she answered raspily… her voice still hoarse from the screaming… oh the screaming… Hitomi started trembling once again, she gripped tightly to the fine sheets.
"Hitomi, dear, are you all right?" Millerna asked, sitting down on a corner of the bed and laid hand on her shaking hands.
"he did such terrible things and whispered his horrible secrets in my ear… each one worse than the next. He did things no one should have ever done to me…" Hitomi started to shudder and tears ran down her face. Millerna leaned over and embraced her. Making soothing noises in attempts to calm the young woman's raw nerves.
Finally when she was done crying Millerna's face went pensive,
"I know this might be too soon but, I have to ask. Van's outside waiting…"
Hitomi's eyes opened wide in horror, how could she ever face another man, let alone Van.
"…He's been worried sick. Do think you are ready to talk to him?"
"No, I want him to see me like this. I don't think I can ever face him again…he's never going to love me…" Hitomi's voice started raising by pitch and then into hysteric's almost.
"All right, but, I think he loves you more than you can imagine… I wish you'd give him a chance…"
"no, after what that thing did to me…" Hitomi broke off and turned around and cried into her pillow.
Millerna watched from the other side of the room and silently opened the door. A strangled cry was heard from the other end of the room,
"Please…don't leave me alone…" Millerna's heart nearly tore from her body at Hitomi's statement. Millerna knew she couldn't stay, so she looked outside the room. Merle sat next to Van, quietly..
"Merle, can you come inside? Just stay with her, she needs a friend…" Millerna said quietly. The cat-girl obediently came into the room and sat on the side of Hitomi's bed.
The castle was quiet and not soul was awake, except Van. He was standing up and leaning against the door frame to Hitomi's chambers. Gingerly he pressed his ear up to the door, listening to hear if someone was awake. Nothing, he stood back and creaked the door open at bit, to look inside and see how the girls were doing. Obviously he was very worried and nobody told him of any recent developments. First, he saw Merle, curled up into a tight ball on the end of Hitomi's bed. But, she wasn't in her bed. Stepping into the doorway he glanced to either side of the room. She was standing outside the window on the balcony, gazing at the sky, dressed in a simple night shift that fell down to her knees. And, for some reason it didn't suprise him that he'd find her there. Walking to the window, he moved slowly and quietly, so he wouldn't wake up Merle. When he reached the balcony he stopped at the window's door-frame and slightly leaned against it.
"Hitomi?" he asked, nearly whispered. Her eyes opened wide with fright and she cringed, imitating a deer caught in the headlights. She took a step back and away from him. Suddenly caught in a uncomfortable situation he fidgeted and asked,
"...er,... what are you thinking about"
Hitomi looked at him for a moment and then took a long took back at the sky.
"I was thinking about home, I think maybe I should go back..."
Van wasn't suprised, yet again...somehow he knew this was coming but he had to ask,
"why"
Hitomi looked back at him, her eyes beautiful and yet terrible under the moon's glow. "You know. You've always known. My stay always hinders you and everyone else. I feel guilty about it. Your always able to accomplish greater things when I'm not around."
Van looked down, ran a hand through his hair and stated
"That's not true, you never hinder me... they only time you ever hinder me is when your not around. I'm so busy thinking about you it seems I can never get anything done."
Hitomi looked like she was about to cry, then she walked over to the edge and looked down. Van looked at her and knew, that if he didn't do something, she would jump. Taking a small box out of his pocket he walked over to Hitomi and knelt down on one knee. Her eyes gazed at him curiously for once and he smiled, despite the seriousness of the situation.
"Will you, Hitomi Kanazaki, marry me and be my queen?" his voice trembled at bit as he opened the small box to reveal a simple ring with a diamond in the middle and chips off the red stone of Escaflowne.
Hitomi's mind was racing, Van just proposed to her!!
"What about that other girl?" she asked in an unsteady voice.
"What other girl?" Van asked "there is no other girl"
Hitomi sighed in relief, so the woman she had previously heard talking...it was all gossip.
"Yes" she whispered almost unsure of herself and she held out her trembling right hand to Van. He slipped the ring on her hand, his hand equally trembling. A wave of relief swept over her and she leaned over and hugged Van, for once something good had happened in her life.