Willow sat on the other side of the room, in one of the plush, cushiony chairs that Buffy had refused. "I don't know," Willow said quietly, looking over to her right, where a lightly snoring Ms. Harris slept, crunched up into an uncomfortable position in the next chair. "He's had a really bad experience. I mean . . ." She trailed off, not wanting to continue.
Willow had spent most of the time behind the tall bush calming Cordelia, who for some reason would just not shut up. When she finally quieted down, Willow sneaked around the bush to check on Xander, and that's when she saw him reaching out to drink Angel's blood.
Willow shuddered all of the sudden. "You ok, Will?" Buffy asked, worried. Willow just nodded yes and then stared at the still form lying on the bed before her.
IV's were poked in every place possible in Xander's skin, while blood, oxygen, and other nutrients flowed through the transparent tubes, keeping Xander alive. He himself was still very pale, and had been in a coma for two days, although the wound on his neck had mysteriously disappeared.
At first, Willow had feared he had become a vampire, but the sunshine from the open window that streamed across Xander's face disproved that notion. Instead, she was worried that Xander had lost too much blood to ever wake up from this coma of his.
Next to her, Ms. Harris tossed in her sleep and murmured something that sounded vaguely like she was ordering Chinese food. All Saturday and Sunday she had stayed faithfully by Willow and Buffy's side, except for an hour on Sunday when she went to pray for Xander at church, although she was not a church-going woman.
As for Buffy-well, she blamed herself for Xander's predicament. In fact, she was blaming herself for everything that Angel was doing. She didn't dare speak of Jenny Calendar to anyone and, in her short time she was spending at the hospital, she was faithfully guarding Xander's room at night, in case something cared to pay their respects after visiting hours. Willow had told Buffy repeatedly to go back to her room, get some rest so that she could get better quick, but the Slayer said that she would get better as soon as Xander came out of his coma.
"I said Shoo-Mai sauce!" Ms. Harris yelled loudly as she suddenly woke up from her sleep. She looked around, embarrassed, and then busied herself with fluffing the seat cushion she had been sitting on for the past eight hours.
"So, Buffy, Willow . . ." she got up and dusted off her suit. Lynda Harris was a prominent lawyer in Sunnydale, and the woman lived and slept in suits. "I'm going down to the cafeteria to grab a cup of coffee . . . anybody want something to drink? Something to eat? Anything I can get for you girls?"
"A-actually, you know, I think I'll go with you," Willow said, trading looks between Lynda and Buffy. "I-I'm kind of hungry from being here so long. And I better call Oz, 'cause I said I would, and stuff." She gave a nervous smile and almost her reason to leave-Buffy needed to reconcile with Xander, even if Xander couldn't respond. She had so much pressure on her now: she didn't need this too.
"Ok, Willow, grab me a Coke." Buffy still stared at Xander, a blank expression on her face: a façade for what was going on underneath. She looked up to meet the sad, tired eyes of Lynda Harris. "I-if anything changes with Xander, I'll get somebody to call you."
Lynda nodded, and before leaving the room, stepped by Willow and bent to give Xander a kiss. She matted his hair down in a loving way, and it was this touching scene that teared-up Willow's eyes. Jordan Harris, Xander's father, had left Lynda and his son when he was only five years old, and Lynda had never been close to her son since. They were like two strangers sharing one big, empty house. And now she was feeling guilty that the one thing that would being her closer to her son would be his near-death experience.
"OK, I'm ready." Lynda choked back some tears and left the hospital room with Willow's arm around her shoulders. Buffy was left alone with Xander.
After cracking all the knuckles she had, Buffy managed to muster up enough strength to move to Willow's empty chair. She scooted closer to the bed and reached for one of Xander's limp hands. She played her fingers along his palm like she was reading his fortune. Anything, to avoid talking to him.
"I hope you can hear me," she started in a low voice. Then she gave herself a sardonic smile. "Doesn't really matter, anyway, 'cause I don't know what to say." She looked at Xander. In his sleep he looked so sweet, like a little child asleep on Christmas Eve, just waiting to wake up early and smell the breakfast on the stove his mother didn't have, to rip apart the wrapping paper that covered the presents under the Christmas tree.
Tears sprang to Buffy's eyes. "I'm so sorry, Xander." A tear escaped from her eye, and she wiped it away with the back of her right hand. "I've just been screwing up so much lately. It's all my-"
"Ms. Summers?" Buffy turned around sharply, to see a plump, black nurse with a big smile on her face and a big needle in her hand standing in the doorway. She moved more into the room, and Buffy could read the nurses nametag-Candy.
"I'm sorry to, uh, interrupt your little moment here, but Dr. Wilkinson would like to see you now in your room." Nurse Candy stressed that sentence very much, so she wouldn't have to add that Buffy was suppose to be in her room anyway. "Also, I'm going to need a moment alone with Mr. Harris." The nurse held up a large needle. "This might get ugly."
That worked. "Uh, ok," Buffy said, getting out of the chair and walking towards the door. She gave one last look at Xander, so deathly pale and lying so still on the bed, and turned towards the nurse. "If he wakes up, have somebody tell me, ok? I would like to know."
"Ok," Nurse Candy said in the voice adults usually use to humor teens and children. "On you go now," she shooed. Buffy quickly shut the door behind her.
Candy turned to look at Xander. She walked over to the foot of the bed and glanced at her clipboard. She then compared that information to the chart lying on the bed. Shrugging and making a "hmmf" sound, she walked over to Xander's right, and placed her clipboard on the adjacent counter top.
"You know what I like about patients in coma's?" Candy said as she dabbed Xander's right arm with a cotton ball soaked in alcohol. Xander didn't answer, of course, so Candy kept chatting to herself. "You don't have to make small talk with them."
Done with the swabbing, Candy reached over for the needle. She looked to see if the correct amount of liquid was inside the vile, and satisfied, held it so it barely touched Xander's skin. "It's also great that I don't have to tell them that it's only gonna hurt a lot." She smiled, and then punctured flesh.
The heart monitor raised a little in beats per second, but that was very normal. What was not normal was that suddenly a little sound of pain escaped from Xander's lips, and then his eyes flashed wide open.
"Oh!" Candy, startled lost her hold on the needle and backed away, running smack into the counter. She watched as Xander sat up and looked groggily around the room.
"What . . ." Xander looked around until his gaze rested upon his arm, where the needle, unattended, still stuck out. "Ow!" yelled Xander, his voice rising in panic. "Please, needle, out, now!"
Candy ran back towards her patient and gently retracted the needle from his arm. The pained expression on Xander's face lessened, but he still looked at the nurse with confusion. "Where am I?" Xander asked. "What am I-how'd I get here?"
Lynda and Willow chose that exact moment to enter the hospital room again. At first, Lynda just paused, not believing what she saw, but then she dropped the tray of food that she was carrying and ran towards her son.
"Xander!" she cried, wrapping her arms around him. Xander just scrunched his eyebrows in the frustration of not understanding what was going on and patted his mother lightly on the back.
"It's ok," he murmured soothingly, patting his mother repeatedly. This woman would not let go of him, and Xander was not used to such affection from his mother. He raised a questioning eyebrow at Willow, who smiled nervously and played with the Coke in her hands.
"Sweetheart, I'm so glad your back to the waking world!" Lynda finally let go of her son, and Xander awkwardly sat back against his bed.
"Um, can anybody explain why I'm the hospital with wires hooking me up to a machine?" Xander asked, a bit cross. He was never in the best mood after waking up from a two-day long sleep.
"You don't remember?" Lynda asked, walking over to Nurse Candy. The nurse told her something quickly and then left the room to get the doctor. Lynda turned back to her son and said, "Well, Willow filled me in on the story. Willow?"
"Um . . ." Willow cleared her throat and then gave a little cough or two. "Um, Xander, remember, we were coming out of the Bronze when you, uh, you ran into that jutting piece of the wall? By accident? Cordelia and I had to drive you to the hospital because you were bleeding really badly . . . you know, remember?"
Xander looked at Willow with raised eyebrows once more. "I'm drawing a blank here-" Suddenly his eyes darkened, and his whole face hardened. "Oh, yes, I remember now," he said through clenched teeth, his brown eyes like sharp daggers. "The wall." He practically growled the last word.
For a moment, there was awkward silence, and then Lynda turned towards Willow. "I don't mean to be rude, honey, but do you think that Xander and I could have a moment alone? I mean, before the doctor comes?" Lynda's tone was pleading.
"Oh, yeah, sure," Willow agreed rapidly. "I'll just go see if Buffy's in her room." She waved good-bye to Xander; since visiting hours were almost over; she probably wouldn't get to see him until tomorrow, after school. "Get better soon, ok, for me?"
Xander gave her a little nod but kept his dark face on. Willow left the room as fast as she could, not wanting to deal at all with Xander at the moment.
Once in the hallway, she stood outside the door, trying to remember where Buffy's room was, because for the life of her, it had just left her mind. All she could think of, all that she could see in her mind's eye, was Xander grabbing Angel's wrist and sucking it so hungrily, getting that one good bite in before Willow managed to pry them apart . . .
Willow shivered and then took the left corridor. She was certain that this way was the way Buffy had come from. But then again, she could have come from the right . . . shouldn't have Xander become a vampire?
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Buffy sat on the edge of her hospital bed, tapping the toes of her feet against each other in a moment of pure boredom. She wanted to be back in Xander's room, watching over him-who knew if Angel would decide to pay him a visit? But you don't have to be there now, a voice said in her mind. It's daylight.
Shut up, Buffy told the voice crossly. I owe a lot to him now. And to Giles, and to Jenny. But Jenny's dead, so I can't exactly protect her now, huh?
You're way to bitter for your own good, the voice in her mind responded. Then it shut up completely, leaving Buffy all alone, and with the knowledge that she had just carried on a conversation with a voice in her head.
"You're going insane, Buffy," she told herself aloud, shaking her had sadly. "Yep, you're finally gonna get those pretty padded walls you always see in the movies but Mommy never let you have."
"Don't talk that way!" Buffy turned around to see Willow just entering the room. "You're not going insane! You're just going through a lot right now."
"You know, as much as I appreciate being loved, I wish people would stop sneaking up on me. Dr. Wilkinson just did it a few seconds ago. Oh!" She brightened up and climbed more on to the bed, sitting Indian-style and leaning forward to talk to her best friend. "She says that I'm getting better faster, so then I can go out Slaying again, and kick Angel's ass." She said this quite defiantly, like she meant it from her heart. But Willow shaked her head sadly in disbelief.
"You're not ready to kill him yet," Willow said sadly. "I know it, and you know it. The way you look at him, even when he's acting evil, and the way you talk about him . . . you still love him Buffy."
Buffy's lips were pressed together tightly as Willow stated the obvious, but they quivered slightly when the Slayer tried to speak. "You're right," Buffy said. "You always are."
"Not always," Willow said, blushing and sitting down in one of the ragged, plush chairs, much like the ones in Xander's hospital room. She handed Buffy the Coke. "Some of the times, yeah. Mostly."
"Well, you've got self-esteem, I'll credit you with that," Buffy said wryly, but with a smile on her face to indicate that she was only poking fun at her best friend. But Willow seemed down all the sudden.
"What, you get me in high spirits and then all the sudden you're the one with issues?" Buffy asked. She raised her left eyebrow. "C'mon, Will, spill the beans. What's up?"
"It's about Xander . . . what happened to him." Willow was practically speaking under her breath. "A lot more happened then Angel just sucking his blood. Xander, he, h-he-" Willow couldn't go on.
"What is it, Will?" Buffy asked gently, afraid herself to know the answer to her question.
"It's what Xander did!" Willow wailed, losing control. "Angel drained his blood, I guess, I mean, I know, but what I saw was Xander sucking the blood back, like, you know, a whole big sucking thing! Isn't that how they make vampires?! And if they do, then why didn't it work on Xander, and I'm just gonna stop my incessant babbling because I'm going to break down and cry any minute!" And that's just what she did.
"Oh Will," Buffy said, standing up and hurrying over to her sensitive friend. She enveloped her into a big bear hug, and Willow hugged tightly back, crying into Buffy's shoulders.
"This is weird, though," Willow managed to say, although the thin material of the hospital gown muffled her voice. "Maybe . . . maybe we should ask Giles to help us with this."
