But It Will Make You Miserable First
See Chapter One for WARNING, disclaimer, etc.
Chapter Forty-Four
Lee woke to find the afternoon sun low on the horizon. He carefully got out of bed, not wanting to wake Amanda. She slept on, undisturbed by his exit. He crossed the room and exited, shutting the door softly behind him.
He was relieved to know that Amanda was healing bit by bit, even if it wasn't visible. The fact that she still desired him was good news in itself. The fact that he could share his fears and she understood amazed him. Most of all, he was encouraged that things would one day return to normal or at least what passed for normal in their lives.
Dotty and Jamie had not returned home from the museum. Lee entered the kitchen and peered in the refrigerator, looking for something to make for dinner.
"Ah, ha," he thought to himself, spying ground beef and cheese. "My famous 'Lee's Lasagna' for dinner tonight. Humming to himself, Lee set about preparing the sauce to simmer. He went down to the basement where he and Phillip had built a small wine cellar shortly after he moved in. It was a little crooked but it worked. He smiled at the memory. Things had been so hopeful then. He was holding onto the thought that they would be there again soon. Selecting a bottle to accompany the meal, Lee went back upstairs to check on his sauce.
As he entered the kitchen he heard the loud 'PLOP, PLOP' of the sauce boiling. Rushing to the stove, he reached out for the pot handle. "Ouch, blast," he exclaimed as he hurriedly jerked the pot off the heating element and snatched his hand to his mouth. "That was hot," he mumbled to himself, crossing to the sink and running cool water over his hand. The sauce pan continued to 'PLOP' behind him. Usually he like these pots, they were made of porcelain covered steel. While they were slow to heat up, they were great for simmering. Once the blasted things got this hot, however, it took forever for the temperature to cool below boiling.
Hoping that the sauce wasn't burnt, Lee lifted the lid, using the plaid potholder Amanda had given him. She said it was a joke but Lee never did understand it. Still, she gave it to him and he quickly became enamoured of its softness. It was just the right size for his hand as well. She never would say where it came from and there was no tag.
Turning his thoughts back to dinner, Lee stirred the sauce, the aroma wafting through the house. It wasn't burnt, thankfully. Lee turned the burner on Warm, setting it to simmer while he prepared the rest of the ingredients. Time passed quickly and dinner was soon assembled, ready to be popped in the oven. Lee turned to find Amanda coming down the stairs, her hair still damp from the shower.
He met her at the foot of the stairs. Amanda stopped one step up and met her husband face to face. Standing here, she didn't have to look to meet his eyes. Lee's arms snaked around her waist and she rested her forehead against his.
"Feeling rested?" He asked with a smile.
"Umm, very. You shouldn't have snuck out of bed, though. You never know what could have happened if you'd stuck around," she teased.
"Hey," he exclaimed in mock indignation. "Some one had to feed us. Besides," he went on, his voice softening, "You needed the rest. I know you've been up the past few nights."
"Lee," she sighed, "I didn't mean to disturb you when I got up. I just couldn't sleep, worrying about everything."
"I know, sweetheart, I know. It's okay. I would have gotten up with you if you'd need me," he said simply.
"I know, but it wasn't anything you could do to help. I wrote in my journal. That helped. And you, big fella," she playfully punched him in the chin and he jerked back, pretending to be hurt. "You need your rest to catch all those bad guys." She giggled at his antics as he staggered away from her, theatrically spinning round and round before collapsing on the kitchen stool, pretending to be knocked out.
Amanda laughed outright as one eye peeked up at her to see if she was watching. Lee stood and struck a dramatic pose, his hands clasped over his heart, affecting a tragic face.
"Ah," he exclaimed in mournful tones. "I practice my art and she laughs, I am,"
(here his arm flew up, covering his eyes from view), "I am devastated, wounded to the quick by her indifference."
Amanda was laughing so hard tears began rolling down her cheeks as she bent double, holding onto the hand rail for support, gasping for breath. Lee took one more peek at her from under his forearm and lost the fight to keep a straight face.
Both of them were lost in laughter. One would gain control as the other struggled to stop but a look would set them both off again. Laughing so hard they couldn't stand, Lee and Amanda crawled towards each other, meeting halfway across the kitchen floor and collapsing in each other's arms.
Chapter Forty-Five
That was the sight that greeted Dotty and Jamie when they returned. At Dotty's quizzical look, Lee and Amanda lost control all over again.
"Jamie, I think the pressure has gotten to them," she said in a stage whisper. "You call the men in the white coats and I'll keep them calm."
At the sudden silence that greeted this remark, Dotty's gasp could be heard clearly. "Oh, dear, I'm so sorry. What a thoughtless thing to say. Please, Lee, Amanda, forgive me."
Amanda crossed the room to her mother and put her arms around her. "It's okay, Mother. We are all having to adjust to this. At least we can forget for a while and laugh. It keeps us sane." She had to smile at her own choice of words. Jamie and Lee joined the two women and they all hugged each other in silence for a moment. Wiping a tear from her eye, Dotty broke the embrace.
"Is that the famous 'Lee's Lasagna' I smell?" she said breaking the moment. "I am so hungry I could eat a horse. This boy would not stop all afternoon, Amanda. I have never seen anyone so enthralled with pictures. I kept offering him a snack but, nooo, he wouldn't leave the exhibit. What was I to do? And then all the way home, chatter, chatter, chatter. I declare, I don't know where he gets it from. This need to ramble on and on. Well, dear," she changed the subject instantly as the others exchanged glances. "How soon until dinner?" she asked Lee.
"Soon enough that the table needs to be set," Lee said. Jamie busied himself with that task while Amanda drew her mother aside.
"Mother, have you noticed Joe acting strangely around the boys?" she asked in a low tone.
"Strangely how, dear?" she replied.
"Well, you know, being critical. Getting on to them about stuff. Overreacting about little things. That kind of strange," Amanda replied.
"Well, he does seem critical about everything the boys have been doing since your attack. Especially.." her voice trailed off as understanding dawned. "Do you mean to tell me that Joe is blaming Phillip for that? How ridiculous!! It has nothing to do with him, it was just, well, just well. You and I both know..I mean and so does Lee. How could Joe blame Phillip? Amanda, I don't understand."
"I don't either, Mother, but that seems to be what's going on and it didn't help Phillip to be hearing such different messages from his parents. Joe needs to be set straight and I intend to be the one to do it. Soon," she stated firmly, taking her mother by the arm and guiding her back to the kitchen to eat as Lee put dinner on the table.
Over dinner, Jamie told them all about the photo exhibit. He really liked the modern abstracts.
"And, Mom," he enthused, "there's a juried show the Art teacher wants to enter one of my photo's into. She thinks I have a good chance to place," he beamed.
"That's great, Jamie. I am so proud of you, sweetheart. We all are." A chorus of agreement sounded from the other occupants of the table. "What's this photo of, sweetie?"
Jamie fell silent for a moment. "I'd rather not say right now, Mom." Seeing the look on her face he went on hurriedly. "Mom, nothing like that. It's just kind personal. You'll see it if I get accepted in the show, okay?"
Silence greeted this request then there were nods of agreement. Dinner was finished and a plate wrapped up to be taken to Phillip. The whole family was going to visit tonight. They cleaned the kitchen and piled into the Explorer for the trip.
Chapter Forty-Six
Dotty and Jamie had not seen Phillip in the hospital. Nothing they had heard could prepare them for the experience. Amanda was concerned that Jamie would get upset at the security surrounding the ward, but he took it in stride. Amanda could see Dotty fighting back the tears as she gazed at the locked doors and barred windows.
Lee wrapped his arm around Dotty's waist and whispered in her ear. Dotty gave a sniff and a small smile appeared on her face at his words. Amanda barely had time to wonder what had been said before she was enveloped in a bear hug from her oldest son.
"Mom, is that food?" he asked, eyeing the plate in Jamie's hands. "Man, I am starved; the food here is rotten! What did you bring me, Jamie?"
"Yeah, well, hi to you, too." Jamie groused good naturally as he handed the plate to his brother.
"Oh, sorry, hi and Grandma," Phillip turned to Dotty and wrapped his arms around her in the same way Lee had a moment earlier.
'When did he get so tall?' Amanda wondered, watching the exchange with pleasure. 'Who taught him that move, I wonder?' She smiled at Lee, who was watching the exchange between Phillip and Dotty. 'Did Phillip pick that up from Lee or did Lee pick it up from us?' Shaking her head to dismiss the topic as irrelevant, Amanda herded the group toward a table to sit.
"Now, Phillip, where is the microwave around here?" Dotty asked looking around the room. "I mean, don't they allow you to eat here? Surely the staff knows you are a growing boy who needs his food. Where's the kitchen?"
"Oh, Grandma, you are so funny," Phillip laughed and shook his head at her. "They aren't going to let us have access to anything that could hurt us. No kitchen around here. But I can get the counselor to nuke this for me in the staff room, just a sec."
Phillip took the plate to a burly man near the nursing station and spoke earnestly to him. The plate exchanged hands and Phillip returned to the table, taking an empty chair.
"Be just a few minutes, and he's gonna bring me a soda as well. Boy, that will be good."
"They don't let you have anything to drink?" exclaimed Dotty. "Amanda, are you sure this is the type place Phillip needs to be? It doesn't seem like they take very good care of him here. Why, these children could get dehydrated. They could be weak from lack of food. I just think this it uncalled for and I …"
Dotty wound to a halt at a look from Lee. A glance at Amanda told Dotty she had gone too far. As the tears began to trickle down Amanda's cheeks, Dotty stood and took Phillip by the shoulder.
"Come on, Phillip, show me your room while we wait. You come too, Jamie."
The trio walked down the hall with Jamie's words echoing in their ears.
"Hey, do you have to share a room in here? And…"
Amanda wiped the tears from her face as Lee held her by the shoulders. He tried to pull her into his embrace but she held back.
"It's okay. I'll be fine." She took a deep breath and let it out slowly. "I WILL be fine. Mother is just shocked and she," a small laugh escaped Amanda. "She does ramble when she gets nervous. She didn't mean anything by it."
"I know," Lee replied, using his thumb to rub the back of Amanda's hand. "Good thing we know her so well, huh?" He smiled at Amanda's brisk nod of agreement. "Or it could be annoying not endearing, hmm?"
"Oh, never annoying, that's just my mother. She's always been that way. Ever since I was a little girl, I remember. Anytime she got nervous or upset, she'd just start rambling away. Daddy used to laugh and laugh. He'd say 'Now, Panda, aren't you glad you don't take after your mother?' And Mother would slap at him and he'd hug her." Amanda wound down, aware that at the moment she sounded just like Dotty. "Good thing I'm not like that, huh?"
Lee's burst of laughter came as Phillip's plate of food returned from the staff room complete with a soda, as promised. Phillip, Jamie and Dotty returned to see what was so funny but that topic was quickly forgotten as Phillip began tucking away his food.
Jamie told him the school news while he ate and gave him the "Feel better" wishes from his friends afterwards. Amanda told him that King Eddie had seen him leaving the Embassy and called her. The King was concerned about Phillip and wanted to help. Dotty was strangely quiet and Lee watched her closely. When Phillip had finished eating, Lee took the dishes.
"Come on, Dotty, let's see where we can go clean these up," he asked. Dotty rose and the two of them headed out the locked door.
"All right, give," he said as they entered the kitchen area. "Are you okay?"
"Why wouldn't I be okay, Lee? My daughter was raped. She may be pregnant. Oh, don't give me that look, buster. I know well enough that she's upset about something and I can add two and two together. I was with her the past two times, remember? Now, my grandson is in a prison because he wanted to kill himself. His father is losing his mind and ruining their relationship with his foolishness. And I just want it all to stop. I want it to go away."
By now Dotty was in tears and in Lee's arms. Her fists were pounding against his chest and sobs threatened to rack her body. Lee held her, wondering vaguely if he was destined to be the West women's crying post. Her distress quieted as she vented the worst of it.
"Oh, my goodness, I am so sorry, Lee. I don't know what came over me. Did I hurt you?" Dotty tried in vain to dry the wet spots her tears had caused on Lee's sweater. She refused to look into his eyes.
Lee took her hands in his, and as he had done so many times in the past with Amanda, lifted Dotty's face with his fist, forcing her to look at him.
"Dotty, it's okay. Let me be here for you the way you've always been here for everyone else.
TBC