Well guys,
Woo hoo more angst fic from me! Aren't you all proud? Anyway this is my first official songfic. The song is "Could We Start Again, Please?" And it's from that great rock opera, "Jesus Christ Superstar." Anyway it's sad. The Laby peeps belong to the Great Jim Henson, the lyrics belong to Tim Rice (Oscar + Tony Winner) and Andrew Lloyd Webber (Genius + platinum plated scank.) I love his music but I don't like him as a person very much. Anyway I am a comment whore so please gimme a cheap thrill, even if it is a flame.
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Sarah Williams sat looking out her window into the cold moon light. The snow falling made it seem like crystals were falling onto the quiet hills that surrounded the house. The white robe she had wrapped about her didn't ward out the chill but Sarah didn't care. Her lean fingers pushed at the brash lock, then the shudder of the window. She put her head out and the soft silken flakes caressed her face like the gloved hand of a lover.
The snow settled about her eye lashes and almost seemed to hide the deep shadows that lined the bottom of her eyes. She half reclined out the window, wrapping bruised eyes about her head. A low sigh was given as the wind cast her thin hair about her, in some cruel mockery of a long ago ballroom scene. She didn't see any of this, all she could see was the moon as it hit the snow. That odd play of light made the whole world seem like it was trapped inside a snowglobe.
Her voice was amazingly strong for someone who looked so fragile and the words fell into the stillness around her. In a fair glen two deer stopped to listen to the heartrending words that seemed almost to mesh in perfectly with the scene.
"I've been living to see you.
Dying to see you, but it shouldn't be like this.
This was unexpected,
What do I do now?
Oh, could we start again please?
Could we start again please?"
On that movie screen in her head, she watched her life play out, flittering from scene to scene like some sort of demented butterfly. In so many arms, she had run from his embrace. In so many lovers she had tried to block out his face. The musicians who she had used to block out the sound of his voice, the drugs she had taken to find her way back to his place.
All of it lead to the place she was at now, the sharing of the needles, the unprotected sex, all of it lead to the dreadful hospice she was at. All of it lead to the disease that was eating her insides. How odd it was that your world could contract to four little letters: A I D S. But somehow her faith still leapt on and she knew that he would find her. He would know the truth.
"I've been very hopeful, so far.
Now for the first time,
I think we're going wrong.
Hurry up and tell me,
This is just a dream.
Oh could we start again please?
Could we start again please?"
It started to sound almost as if she was getting scared that he wouldn't come, and her fingers closed tighter around the figure against her chest. Her voice still carried into the night, and her thoughts turned to him. Of his eyes when they danced in the ballroom; when she denied him. He had ignored her for so long, would he really come now? .
"I think you've made your point now.
You've even gone a bit too far to get the message home.
Before it gets too frightening,
We ought to call a halt,
So could we start again please?"
And she held to that phrase like a prayer, her voice sounding more pleading each time the words were cast out into the world.
"Could we start again please?
Could we start again please?
Could we start again please?
Could we start again please?"
But, that chill was settling once more in her bones, and the sky held no sign of the snowy owl that she longed to see. She blinked a few times, starting to become more sleepy. A yawn was given and the moonbeams once more kissed her cheek. Her voice grew softer, more sweeter somehow, and the animals ventured closer, and more liquid eyes swept the snowy sky.
But she finally decided that she had no choice, she had to tell him then or maybe never. Her eyes opened as she tried to rally her strength. For a brief moment her candle burned brighter.
"Wish I could reassure you,
Wish I could talk to you and tell you how I feel.
I've been very careless,
This I don't deny,
But could we start again please?
Could we start again please?"
Her voice became very soft as she almost seemed to murmur them into death's ear. And the grasp on the figure started to loosen. By the end the words were barely even breathed.
"You surely know I love you,
But something in me stands aside, and lets you slip away.
Perhaps that's what you wanted,
Perhaps I want that too.
Oh could we start again please?
Could we start again please?"
And with that she took her final breath, her lips forever forming the letter J. The animals lowered their heads in grief and it seemed that for one moment the entire world stopped. A great wailing was heard from deep within the Underground as the song Sarah sang filled his ears. All of the love that she had felt for him tore into his chest and pulled out the air from his lungs.
She had died. There wasn't a damn thing he could do about it.
Within a flash he found himself next to her body, and he reached out to caress a legin that marred her lovely face. He closed his eyes and spoke to the fates, asking them that she be returned in someway, in some lifetime.
They agreed. So now Jareth awaits fulfillment on the wish that Sarah made all those years ago. And the words haunt him wherever he goes.
"Could we start again please?"
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~Kim, The Manipulative Little Monster