Another Big Fight
We are once again at the wrestling arena to watch people beat the living tar out of each other. What fun! Our Announcer (who is now in a wheelchair from lasts weeks' fight) is getting ready to tell us who will be fighting tonight! Everybody shut up! I said shut up!
Announcer: Oh yes! This week I have my script, my mug, my pencil, my baseball bat, my alarm clock, my discman, my blood sample and…Oh! Tonight's fighters will be "Weird Al" Yankovic vs. Paul McCartney!
Half of our crowd is voting for Paul as president…I mean that and winning the fight. Note: Everybody who's rooting for Paul is all girls.
The other half of the crowd is rooting for "Weird Al" Yankovic. Whatever you do, don't get on their bad side. Or else…
Each of our wonderful, beautiful, loving…oh whatever. Each of our contestants is supplied with one weapon. Paul has his guitar and Al has his accordion.
Paul: Get back! Get back! Get back to where you once belong! Get back, Jo-Jo! Get ba-
Al just strangled Paul with his accordion while Paul smashes Al over the head with his 500$ worth guitar! How smart of Paul!
So Al just starts humming Britney Spears' songs and Paul puts his hands over his ears and starts rolling around on the ground.
Well thanks Al! Half our crowd just left because you sang Britney Spears!
Announcer: I sort of like Britney…
Crowd rips the Announcers lungs out! Ouch!
Anyway, our contestants have a break. Let's see if we can interview them…
Paul: (singing to himself) Get back! Get back! Get back to where you once belong…
Paul?
Paul: Get back, Jo…What? Oh! Hi!
How do you feel?
Paul: Um…I feel like singing. Get back! Get back! Get back to-
AAAHHHH!!!!
Let's see how Al is doing…
Al: (talking to self) @%# accordion!
Um…Al? Please stop cursing.
Al: What? Oh! Sorry…my &%#@ accordion-
I SAID STOP CURSING!
Gosh, some people really get on my nerves!
Announcer: ------------------------------------------------
Oh! Forgot he couldn't talk. If you don't have lungs, it's kinda hard to talk. I'll fill in for him.
BigHeadBoy: Start killing and fighting and murdering each other or whatever you do. (I ring bell)
Al starts playing his accordion bad on purpose and Paul lifts up the half-dead Announcer with no lungs and chucks him at Al! Ouch! The half-dead announcer with no lungs was still in his wheelchair!
A valley girl runs up to Paul and asks him for his autograph.
Valley girl: Like, like, give me your, like, autograph! Like, yeah! They have, like, a sale at, like, Abercrombie today! Like ahhhhhhhhh!
Paul: Get out! Get out! Get out of this right now! Get out, Valley girl!
Valley girl starts crying.
My goodness! My gracious! My gunnies! My googlyness! My…Oh whatever! We have a winner!
PAUL McCARTNEY!
How do you feel, Paul?
Paul: Get back! Get back! Get ba-
AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
The End