Disclaimer: The all-powerful J. K. Rowling owns all names you've heard before…I
own Elizabeth, Cheron, Iago, and Profs. Holst, Goodenough, and DeFlora. My friend,
Alana, owns Arianna. Zoe owns Prof. Brohns. And the name of Prof. Lyon belong to
Susan Cooper, the author of The Dark is Rising Sequence.
(A/N: This was my first fanfic, but it hasn't been posted until now. It was written
before the fourth book came out, so some of the information WILL be wrong. Please don't
review saying I got something wrong that was stated in GoF. But I wanted to post this
because I liked it. I know it's not as good as Harry Potter and the Girls of the Wild MagicK
or the Two Girls, the Drews, and A Professor, but it's fun to write on. Remus' moods near
the beginning are a little varied and tend to change quickly. But it's not my fault, it's the
moon. Don't blame me!
Hope you like it. Please review.)


Part One: Outcast Among Friends


Remus paced nervously, beads of sweat trickled down his forehead as he walked. He
pushed his brown hair back from his eyes in a nervous gesture. Madame Pierce, the
librarian, glared at him disapprovingly. He had come here to study for finals, to get his mind
off of his predicament, he thought that he'd be too busy studying to worry, but he was too
nervous to study. So, in an effort to calm himself, he had started to pace.
His closest friends, James, Sirius, and Peter had been getting suspicious. They had
asked him many times to know where he went every month. Remus was running out of
excuses. It was just a matter of time before they figured out that he had always disappeared
at the full moon. They had already asked the Astronomy Professor to borrow some of her
moon charts. When he had asked them why they had borrowed them, they told him that
they had only wanted to do some back-up research. Remus knew them, though, and knew
that three troublemakers such as James Potter, Sirius Black, and Peter Pettigrew would never
ask to do more work than was already assigned. Unless, that is, they needed the information
in some prank they were going to pull. They had complained many times about the amount
of work Professor Holst assigned anyway.
They were coming closer and closer to finding out his secret. His greatest fear was
that they would find it out. Remus was so lost I his own thoughts that he didn't notice as a
girl brushed past him and knocked his Transfiguration book off the desk in her haste.
"Oh, I'm so sorry Remus," said a kind voice. The sweet sound jolted Remus out of
his reverie.
"What? Oh, hello, Elizabeth," he said shakily.
She set the book on the table and looked up at him.
"Remus! You're shaking like a leaf! Are you that nervous about finals?" She said,
truthfully concerned.
"I guess I am." He was striving to regain his composure.
"Well," she smiled, "I'm sure you'll do all right. You always do." She smiled again;
he melted on the spot. He watched her go until she rounded the corner and was gone from
his sight, leaving him back with his misery. Actually, he thought, my greatest fear is that my
friends and Elizabeth will find out. They had all said that they would be friends forever, but
what if they found out that he was a werewolf?
"They'd be disgusted, " he mumbled miserably under his breath, "just like every one
at home."
Remus sat down and looked around himself. His books were open, ready to be
studied from, but he knew now that he wouldn't be able to study.
His mind wandered back to his hometown in Buckinghamshire, his home before
Hogwarts. Remus almost smiled, remembering how carefree and foolish he had been, a boy
of six, thinking that nothing bad could ever happen to him, that he'd always be safe. It was
that way of thinking that led him to take the dare.
A new group of kids had moved into his peaceful neighborhood, all of them bigger
than any of his friends. They started bossing the younger kids to do what they wanted.
When Remus refused to do what they wanted, the largest of them had challenged him to a
fight, fists only. Remus had stood his ground, but had not fought the boy.
Seeing that Remus wouldn't fight him, the older boy had called him a wimp and said
that he was scared. The whole gang had laughed, for no one wanted to be caught
disagreeing with the leader.
The leader said he would have to take a dare to show he wasn't a wimp. Remus
knew that it would be hard and dangerous, but something refused to allow himself to be
called a wimp. He accepted. The leader thought for a short while, it looked like hard work
from his point of view, and announced the dare.
The boy said that Remus had to stay in the town graveyard by the woods for an hour
at midnight that night.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

The town graveyard was located on the edge of town by a large forest. Long ago,
when the first graves had been dug there, the area beside it had been a field. The farmer
who had owned the field had gone into debt because his crops had failed without producing
anything for two years in a row. To get out of debt, he had sold the land that wasn't
producing to the city as extra land for the graveyard. The town officials thought that the
town would grow into a city, and then the extra land would be needed for either housing or
for the graveyard. But the town had stayed small and compact, and the extra land was never
needed. So the grass and trees were allowed to grow up wild, with nothing to hinder them.
Creatures that would not usually be located so near to humans roamed freely in the forest.
And so, as the forest grew, the people of the town forgot how it came to be there and just
thought that it had always been there. And they never gave a thought about what could be
living there.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Remus had snuck from his house at thirty minutes until midnight. He had waited
until he saw the light go out from under his parent's door before he dared to leave. Once he
was out, he ran down the hill to the road and then went on to the graveyard. As he walked
down the side of the road, he noticed that the light from the full moon made the night seem
as bright as day.
Remus carefully opened the gate of the graveyard and looked around. Last fall's
leaves were still on the ground and the gravestones were a pale silver in the moonlight. He
picked a spot to sit down, with his back to a large cross-shaped tombstone. It had seemed as
bright as day while near the road, but now the moon cast deep shadows under and behind
every tree and rock. An early spring wind that still had a hint of the old winter in it blew the
leaves around in eerie swirling patterns, distorting the shadows until it was impossible to tell
what had cast them.
Remus settled down with his back against the gravestone. It was going to be a long
night...and it wasn't going to be fun...

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

He had been in the graveyard for half an hour, when he heard it, the lone howl of a
wolf. Remus shuddered at the sound; it was a natural reaction. He had never heard a wolf
howl before, nor had he ever been in a graveyard at night before either, he thought, mocking
himself. Wow, he thought dryly, two firsts in one night.
The wolf howled again, closer this time. Remus started to get nervous, was it just
him, or was it getting colder out here?
Remus nearly jumped out of his skin as the leaves rustled behind him, suddenly. He
sat petrified, afraid to turn around. From behind him came a sound to freeze marrow within
bone. A horrible crescendo of a growl, more blood curdling than Remus had ever heard,
finally forced him to turn around.
Standing there, in a tense crouch, was a wolf, but it wasn't the same as any wolf
Remus had seen before in the stories that his dad had read him, the muzzle, there was
something about its muzzle that was different…. But this didn't seem very important to
Remus at the time.
Remus backed away slowly. He knew from stories that his father told him that
wolves never attacked humans. He hoped.
The wolf slowly opened its mouth to reveal several fangs, the canines as long as a
fully-grown man's forefinger, each, a deadly icicle of bone. The wolf suddenly gave another
blood-curdling growl and launched itself at Remus. Remus almost saw this too late. He
screamed as he turned and ran into the forest.
After about 15 feet of running, he Happened to glance back to see if it was coming
after him or not. He saw the wolf trying madly to get to its feet. It had landed right where
he had been standing not three seconds ago! He thought enveloped him with a fresh wave
of fear.
Furious at finding its intended prey gone, the wolf struggled to give chase.
Remus, seeing this, tried vainly to urge new speed into his cold and cramped limbs.
But since he was still looking back over his shoulder to see the wolf, he hadn't seen the giant
oak root blocking his path. Still scared of having the creature behind him, he flipped on to
his back and looked up at the wolf. He had put his left arm up defensively to shield his body
from the fangs of the wolf. Good thing he had, too, for at the moment he rolled over, the
wolf sank its icicle-like fangs into the tender flesh of his forearm. He yelled out as the pain
raced through him like a strike from a whip.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*



"Remus!!!" a voice said.
"...Wake up, Remus!" said another.
"Snap out of it, Man!" said yet another voice, urgently.
Remus awoke with a quick snap of his head.
"What? Huh?" he said, dazed and still confused, "Oh, hey, guys."
One of them, one with very untidy black hair, came towards him and put a hand on
his shoulder, "You must have fallen asleep while studying. You dreamed to, by the sound of
it."
This was James talking. Remus gave him a rueful smile.
"You were mumbling in your sleep, too," said a tall, black haired boy next to James.
His hair wasn't as untidy as James but the mischievous grins on each of their faces were
identical. Of course, this was Sirius. He and James were always together.
"You were probably just nervous about exams," said the third and smallest boy,
Peter, who looked terrified at the very mention of exams.
"Yeah," agreed Sirius, "A regular Mcgonnagall Studymare."
Remus grinned at this remark, remembering all of the lectures that Prof.
Mcgonnagall had given them about the importance of studying for the exams, with dire
warnings for any who dare not to.
"I guess so," he said, "I'm probably just too nervous about the tests."
"Don't be," replied James," you know that you'll do fine in there. Come on, we have
Herbology in 10 minutes and I still want to have time to stick a dungbomb in Snape's bag,
he has been even more of a pain lately and I want to thank him."
Sirius smirked at this remark and replied with the same devious smile playing on his
lips," I think I'll help James, I need to thank him too, and show my respect.'
Remus knew they were playing when they said to thank him, they both hated Severus
Snape on the border of loathing, though sometimes Sirius showed more hatred at the sound
of his name.
Remus started clearing away his books into his bag.
"Do you need any help with your books? The dungbombs can wait if you need
help," said James.
He always puts his friends before his own fun thought Remus, but if he found out
that he was offering help to a werewolf, what would he do then?
"Oh, I can manage," he said out loud, "I just need to pack them back into my bag.
He rolled up his Charms notes and put them in his bag.
"I can catch up later." Remus started stuffing his books into his bag, keeping his
head down.
"Okay, we'll go on ahead, this dungbomb has Snape's name plastered all over it,"
smirked Sirius.
"Poor Snape" said James sarcastically, not looking at all sorry.
Remus smiled at the anticipation gleaming from James and Sirius's faces. "Oh,
don't feel sorry for Snape. Feel sorry for the dungbomb." he tried not to laugh at the
incomprehension on their faces. "How would you feel with the name 'Snape' all over you?"
The group laughed so hard at the joke that Peter had almost choked.
James stood up and put his hands into his pockets. "Well, I guess we'll go on ahead.
I just hope that the dungbomb is enough to make Snape really mad! He really is getting to
be a- Oh! I forgot that I had these in here!" He pulled his hands back out of his pockets;
each was holding about four stink pellets. "I was wondering where I had put them."
"Well, I think that if the dungbomb isn't enough, the stink pellets will be," said
Remus thinking of the trouble that they would be getting into for this little prank "Sorry
that I couldn't come along, it would be fun."
"We'll tell you of every stinkin' minute of it!" Laughed Sirius.
"See ya, Remus!" called James as they moved away towards the door.
When they had gone out of sight, Remus stopped putting his books away and sat
down. He pressed the palms of his hands into his eyes and breathed in deeply. His mind
was in turmoil, thinking about his friends, Elizabeth, if he should tell them all that he was a
freak of nature, Elizabeth, his past and Elizabeth.
Elizabeth. What to do? He had liked her as a friend since the beginning of their first
year, that seems so long ago, he thought, almost two years, had it been that long? It seemed
like yesterday to him. But lately, he had regarded her as more than a friend. He hoped that
his friends from school wouldn't end up like his friends from home. Home.
Remus rolled up the right sleeve of his robe and gazed at the scar running the length
of his forearm. He traced it with his finger, wondering how this one scar could cause so
many more for him and his family. He remembered what had happened after his was bitten.
His father had been so disgusted at the thought of being the father of a werewolf that he had
left Remus's mother with a young son, no husband, and no money. Remus had always felt
responsible for his father leaving his mother. When he had gotten out of the hospital, the
whole town knew what had happened in the graveyard. But they hadn't heard why Remus
was there in the first place. His friends started avoiding him. When they did talk to him, it
was only to ridicule him and make him mad. They had started gathering below his window
every night and howling at him saying, "Here Doggy, nice Doggy...We brought you a nice
treat!" While he had stayed up in his room, afraid to come down...They had made him so
mad...So mad...So mad that he had wanted to make every one of them hurt as much as he
did...Make them suffer every bit as much as he did....... No! He pounded his fist on the table
in his anger, making some Hufflepuff third years look up from their studies. That wasn't the
right way to deal with it then, he thought, and it's not the way to deal with it now...He
brought his thoughts back to the present and quickly finished putting his books and papers
up and hurried to Herbology class.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Remus's face was flushed from running as he slid into a spot along the bench in
greenhouse 2. Just as he sat down, Professor DeFlora started class.
"Today class, we will begin on our section on Wolfsbane. Can anyone tell me the
basic properties of Wolfsbane?" He looked around the room expectantly.
"Anyone? No volunteers?" there was silence " Well, I guess I'll have to volunteer
you myself."

Remus tried vainly to send "Not Me!!!" vibes toward the Prof. Needless to say, it
didn't work.
"How about...Mr. Lupin." he smiled at him, waiting.
Remus tried to answer the question without his voice shaking. "Wolfsbane, uhh,
also called Monkshood and Acronite is a plant that is used as medicine to all who have been
poisoned by, umm, slow-acting venoms and poisons. The plant, if eaten directly, is fatal to
the one who consumed it. To be used correctly, it must be boiled in a mixture of spring and
rainwater." He knew that his friends were watching him closely as he finished, "It is also is
used to ward away and kill, uhh, werewolves." He finished in a low voice.
"Very good! Ten points to Gryffindor!"
Remus knew that he should be glad that he got some points for his house to make
up for some of the ones his friends had most likely lost in their prank on Snape. His friends
clapped him on the back and smiled at him in the companionable way Remus had come to
know so well. He smiled and joked with them, on the outside, and laughed along with the
rest as Sirius tricked Peter into taking a drink from a biting teacup he had brought along.
On the inside, though, he was mentally kicking himself for his stupidity for using
that last sentence in his description. Why? He thought, why did he have to be so stupid to
add that last statement? His friends were sure to know now. Remus had been expecting
them to reel back away from him in disgust when he sat down. If they knew, he mused,
then why did they not show it?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

It was the week before finals, and every student from first years to seventh were
cramming as much time in the library as possible. The only ones who didn't seem to notice
that finals were almost upon them were James and Sirius. Peter noticed all right, he was the
one who was in the library almost all of the time even though James and Sirius told him that
he'd do all right. Remus was studying, too, but his mind was distracted by other things.
When Remus saw James & Sirius, they were always working on some thing and they were
disappearing more and more. More than was normal, you could say.
When Remus saw them, he asked them what they were up to. They just said that
they were trying to figure out how to help future students in need. Remus was confused
even more than he had been before he had asked. One day he couldn't stand it anymore, he
went up to them while they were huddled together in the library and tapped them on their
shoulders.
"Okay," he said meaningfully," I want to know what is going on around here. What
are you up to? I know you are up to something and by the way you look while you're talking
about it, it has something to do with creating chaos and mayhem."
They just smiled at Remus. "Do you want to see it?" asked James. Remus nodded
silently as James held up a square piece of parchment. Remus could see a very sketchy
picture of the Hogwarts castle on it. "What is it?" he asked, bemused.
"It's a map that we are making to help future miscreants get around the school
grounds without getting caught." James replied proudly.
"You can help us if you want to. We were going to ask you if you wanted to help us
after Charms today. I guess you wanted to help sooner." Said Sirius.
"Well," Remus smiled at the sketchy drawing of the floors of Hogwarts, "Since
neither of you seems to have any talent in the art department, I'll help."
"Thanks," James replied thankfully, "Drawing is the one thing that neither Sirius or I
can't do."
"Peter already knows too, but he's too busy studying to help any," said Sirius, he
then added, "how can ANYone study that much?"
"Don't worry about him, he'll get by," James said, "we can help him in our spare
time."
Just then, Peter stumbled from behind a bookshelf carrying a stack of books taller
than his head.
"Hi guys," Peter wheezed from behind the books, "Can you lend a hand, these are
heavy..." amazingly, he was able to walk/hobble over to them but as he got there the books
started tipping perilously over to the left. Before the books fell, Sirius quickly took them
from Peter and easily laid them on the table where they had been sitting.
"Thanks. I don't know how much longer I could have held them." He said in his
normally squeaky voice.
Remus looked down at Peter, who was about 5 inches shorter than himself and said,
"Not much longer by the look of it. By the way, what is all this? Don't tell me that these are
for only a little bit of studying." Peter only shrugged.
"Remus?" James said hesitantly, "Now that we are all here, I have something I need
to ask you."
Remus stopped smiling and stared questionably back at him. "What?"
James said," Well, I wanted to ask you-"
"Well, well, well. If it isn't Potter and Company. Such strange places we meet in,"
interrupted the sneering voice of Severus Snape.
For the first time in his life, Remus was thankful that Snape had showed up. He
knew what the question that James had wanted to ask him: Where did he go every month?
And that was a question that Remus didn't want to answer. But his thankfulness was short
lived.
Sirius was first to reply to Snape. He said "What do you want, Greaseman?" Snape
ran a hand through his hair and started to reply when he spotted Remus, who was standing
quietly in the back looking relieved. And Snape couldn't resist the temptation.
"Hey, Lupin! Why are you here? Are you trying to beg some money off of these
jerks to send back to Mommy?"
Remus clenched his fists to stop himself from lunging at Snape. The taunt about his
mother stung. Snape's favorite pastime other than getting James and Sirius into trouble was
insulting Remus about his family's financial affairs.
"Snape," said Remus, his voice full of controlled anger, "It is better to be thought a
fool and keep your mouth shut, than to open it and prove them right. Especially in your
case, for there are a lot of people here who now know that you are a fool."
Snape's pale face contorted. The look on his face made all of them immediately
uncomfortable. All except Remus. Slowly, Snape's face relaxed into a malicious, mocking
smirk. "Hmph." he snorted through his abnormally large nose, "Now I can see why your
father left you. Who'd want a son like you?" He quickly spun on his heel and stalked away.
Good thing he had too, for right when he finished talking, Remus's control had
snapped. He lunged forward, reaching for Snape's throat. James and the others had to
restrain him from choking the life out of Snape, though Sirius was a little hesitant to stop
that from happening.
"I'll kill him...Rip him limb from limb...Head first..." Remus muttered under his
breath while still struggling to get from the arms of his friends and at Snape. His friends
were astounded that Remus was this angry. He was usually the solid one of the group and
was sometimes, the rock of good sense. They had never seen him this angry before.
"Remus," James said while trying to pull him to a chair, "Calm down. You just need
to sit down for a while, Kay?"
"Yeah," agreed Sirius, "Don't waste your energy on Snape, it'll just make you
madder. It's just not worth it, man."
Remus reluctantly quit struggling and sat down. He let out a long sigh and closed his
eyes.
Sirius looked him in the face and said, "What's wrong?"
Remus looked up and put one hand to his temple, "I just have a splitting headache,
and it's a pretty bad one." That was true, an argument with Snape usually resulted in one,
but Remus was suspecting this one wasn't just because of Snape, he had probably had some
help from the moon.
Peter looked at him and said, "Why did that make you so mad, Remus? You know
that he just wants to make you mad, so don't let him get to you."
"Besides, it's not your fault that your father left you and your Mum. His job kept
him away so much that there was no reason to be married. You said so yourself." Sirius
said. He was hoping to make Remus feel better.
Remus looked at each one of his friends. "You wouldn't understand," he said
simply.
"What wouldn't we understand?" said James, "We're your friends, you can tell us
anything."
What wouldn't you understand? Remus thought miserably, there's a lot of stuff you
wouldn't understand, so don't pretend that you would.
"I just need to deal with this alone," he said, which was the truest statement he had
told them about his problem.
"Okay, but if there's ANYthing you need to tell us, we're here for you." James said.
Remus smiled back at him reassuringly.
James continued, "By the way, back to what I was saying before Snape made an utter
fool of himself-"
"Again..." added Sirius.
"Um, yes, again. I was wondering, your mother calls for you to come home about
every month. Why does she want you to come home so often? What do you do when you
get home?"
James, Sirius, and Peter all looked at Remus, for they all had been wondering why he
went home every month.
Remus looked from face to face, looking for some inspiration. His headache was
getting worse by the second. "Uhh, she sometimes needs some help with my Grandmother.
Umm, her health is pretty bad and Mum needs some help taking care of her."
As he was talking, Madam Pomfrey walked in. "Mr. Lupin?" she said as she glanced
at the rest of the group, "Your mother has sent an owl requesting for you to come home
immediately."
"Okay. I just need to put my stuff back up. Bye guys..." he said, quickly putting his
books into his bag.
Madam Pomfrey wasn't satisfied "Yes. But please hurry. Your umm, Mother wants
you home before dark and time's a-wasting."
Remus finished putting his books up and said "Guess it's time for me to go."
"See ya," said Sirius.
Remus looked back at him, "Yeah, you too."
"Hope your Grandma gets better!" said James.
"Yeah. Don't worry." said Remus.
"Don't forget to study in your spare time!" said Peter.
Remus just laughed and rolled his eyes, so did James and Sirius.
Madam Pomfrey just waited at the door until Remus went out.
"I wish I didn't have to do this every month," said Remus as he trudged along beside
Madam Pomfrey.
She regarded him for a moment, then said, "You know that it is in your best interest
for you to do this, and in the best interests of every one in this school too, for that matter."
He just walked along in silence until they reached the Whomping Willow, a
particularly violent tree on the school grounds that was planted for Remus to get under
when he transformed.
"This tree has been getting questioned by some of the students about why it is
there," said Madam Pomfrey as she looked around on the ground for a long stick. "That
Gudgeon boy, Davey, he almost lost an eye last week while seeing if he could get close
enough to touch it."
Remus just blinked at her. He heard pounding in his ears and his sight was rimmed
with red. He looked up, the sun was setting and night was beginning to fall.
Madame Pomfrey poked the tree with the long stick that was kept by a rock for this
time every month and stood back. Remus quickly slipped between the roots and found his
way down the tunnel. He soon found himself coming out of a trap door and into a very
messy room. "Shack, sweet shack" he muttered. There were many pieces of furniture that
were torn apart, their parts littered the room. He sat down in one of the less demolished
ones and put his head down on his hands. Very little light made it through the boarded-up
windows. After a while, he got up and looked through one of the larger cracks up at the
cloudless, night sky. The moon was rising.
Remus tensed. His heart raced and his breath quickened. He collapsed to the floor
and crouched there on his hands and knees, gasping for breath. He wasn't aware as his eyes
tinted red and he sprouted fangs. Remus thrashed about as he tried to control himself. He
fought the strong instinct that was trying to force him to hunt and kill, but the werewolf
took over and Remus was in control no more.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Back at the castle, James & Sirius were staying up late helping Peter study for
Potions. That was his worst subject, and they often had to help him. They had been arguing
about how many drops of slug juice were needed to finish a shriveling solution.
"Sirius, I'm sure that it was only two drops that Professor Brohns told us to use.
Three is too much! It would explode if you put that much in there! " James shouted
desperately.
Sirius just ignored him and kept putting more slug juice into the cauldron.
He didn't even look up as he said, "I KNOW what I'm doing, even if potions isn't
my best subject.
"That's Remus's subject, that and Defense Against the Dark Arts. Professor Lyon
doesn't like me, no idea why, so he usually helps me with it. It's too bad that his
Grandmother fell ill so near the finals." Said Peter while fearfully watching Sirius.
The only response he got was a loud hissing coming from the cauldron. James
looked up quickly and had a quick glimpse of Sirius standing there with a look of triumph on
his face that quickly vanished as the potion exploded. James jumped back as the smoke
quickly spread through the room.
Sirius, who was standing in front of the cauldron, was covered with the foul-smelling
mess. The smoke gradually cleared and when it did, James found Sirius and gave him the I-
told-you-so-so-don't-you-look-at-me-that-way look and suddenly burst into laughter. James
laughed so hard that he woke the whole house. Boys and girls from the dormitories quickly
appeared at the doors to the dorms. One look at Sirius told the whole story. He quickly
found a mirror and looked at himself. He saw what they were laughing at. His hair had
been blown back and had been singed, it was now curly in some places, and his face was
covered in soot and was completely black.
When the noise had quieted and most had gone back to sleep James came up to the
dormitory and called over to Sirius. "So. What did we learn here tonight?"
Sirius was almost asleep and uttered something muffled that sounded something like
"lee-aal-poin-ta-ree-maz-n-donn-blo-tins-up-alees-wen-im-n-tyn-ta"
"Huh? You sounded like some sort of alien when you said that!"
Sirius propped himself up on his elbow and looked over at James, "I said, to leave all
potions to Remus and don't blow things up at least when I'm not trying to!!! Let me go to
sleep. Hopefully the thing will be forgotten by morning."
James lay down and said, "Don't bet on it…" Then he added, "Remus will want to
hear about it too you know."
Sirius turned over to face his friend, "Yeah, he always loves a good story. I wonder
about him sometimes."
James looked thoughtful for a moment and said "You too? Sometimes I have a
feeling he is hiding something from us, all of us, and he's trying to keep us from ever talking
about it, but I just don't know what it is yet."


~*~*~*~*~* *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Remus groaned and opened his eyes. He squinted in the bright sunlight that shone
through the windows. Well, he thought, I survived yet again. He wearily got to his feet and
checked himself over for bruises and cuts. None that couldn't be explained away he noted
in relief. He absentmindedly glanced at his watch. Eight Thirty!!??!! He was going to be late
and Madam Pomfrey would be mad at having to wait for him. He had to hurry and get back
through the tunnel. He quickly got down the trapdoor and ran, full speed, down the passage
to the Whomping Willow. Madam Pomfrey was standing there in a purple bathrobe with
her hair in curlers and looking disheveled.
"MISTER. Lupin! You had me worried sick! I was about to go down there to see
what had happened to you! You have a bloody brass nerve to leave me here to worry about
you while you just slept in..." The barating continued for a while as she escorted him back
to the hustle and bustle of the castle. Remus wasn't even listening to her; he was trying to
distinguish the smells of breakfast from one another. He knew that he caught a wave of
maple syrup and pancakes. He knew this one for it was his favorite thing to have for
breakfast. He looked back at Madam Pomfrey and hoped that she would allow him to go
soon.
"Madam Pomfrey?" he asked tentatively.
"...In my day children showed more respect for......What?" she said, finally dropping
the subject.
"May I go to breakfast now? I'm kinda hungry and I want to eat before I go to
classes today."
She looked at him doubtingly and peered at him to see if he was truly all right or not.
She "Yes, you may go to breakfast," he turned to go but she cut him off, "But you must
have some chocolate before you go." She stuffed a large block of chocolate into his mouth
and walked away. Remus gagged and slowly swallowed.
"Just what I love best, a huge mouthful of chocolate before breakfast," he muttered
as he entered the Great Hall.
"Hey Remus!" Sirius called as he approached and sat down between Sirius and Peter.
He snatched a quick look at Elizabeth and found her smiling at him. He smiled back but
stopped himself before anyone noticed. He had to be careful; Sirius could spot things that
were going on quicker than anyone else that Remus could think of. On Sirius's other side
was a girl named Arianna Ramsey. She and Sirius were so alike that it wouldn't have
surprised Remus if they could finish each other's sentences, though Arianna was sometimes
more serious than Sirius. James was sitting across from Remus, by Lily Evans. She smiled at
Remus like Elizabeth had, but Remus noticed that her smile didn't have the same kind of
flame that shone in Elizabeth's eyes. HER eyes had sparkled like dark diamonds.
Elizabeth's voice broke in on Remus's thoughts, "Remus. How's your grandmother?
James and Sirius told me that you had to go home to help your Mum take care of her."
He nodded and said, "She has been really sick for the last few weeks, and the doctor
said that she's getting worse."
She laid her hand upon Remus's and reassured him gently, "She will be O.K., you'll
see. Pretty soon she'll be up and about and you'll not have to go home."
Remus was temporarily alarmed by the presence of her hand on his but got over it.
She looked at his face and said, "You must have had to help your Mum a lot, you
look like you didn't get a wink of sleep last night. Hopefully you won't fall asleep during
classes today, we are reviewing for exams in Charms and Defense Against the Dark Arts.
But you'll do fine I bet, you always do and always will." She smiled at him and turned back
to something that Lily had said and Remus hadn't heard. He reached for the nearest platter
of pancakes and dug in. He was hungry after the long night. He hoped that no one would
notice that he wasn't joining in all the chatter of the Great Hall. Instead, he listened in as
Sirius and James made a new plan to humiliate Snape.
"...He will probably go tell a Professor if we do anything really obvious. We need to
have a way to get him without him seeing us."
...Yeah, but how do we keep him from seeing us? He'd probably see us even if one
of us hides behind him. He probably has eyes in the back of his head."
"...Be an improvement by my standards. Hey, maybe we could curse him so that
eyes would pop out of the back of his head. What do you think?"
"Ha, very ha. But be serious for once, Sirius. Uh, I mean, Sirius, be
serious…Sirius…oh, Act Seriously!!"
"Man, I love my name."
"Hmm. I bet you do. Still, we have to do something big before the end of the year
or people will start to think that we are beginning to flag."
"And we can't have that, now can we?"
" Mm, no. I wonder if I could get my Dad to…no. He'd never do that for me, he'd
know what I'd want to use it for…besides, we wouldn't get it before the end of the term."
Sirius wasn't listening to James, he had come up with an idea and was contemplating
the probability of getting Snape to make the same mistake he had made the night before.
"You know, James, if one of us is brave enough in potions one day, we could make Snape's
potion blow up like mine did,"
"Yeah, or something close to it. But we have to do it on the right day with the right
potion, because not all potions will explode."
Sirius looked back at James confidently, "Who says?" He held up a Filibuster
Firework and smiled "Last time I checked, everything had a chance of blowing up."
"Especially when you're around, right?" James said as Sirius's meaning started to
dawn on him.
"We'll get to humiliate him in his best class, and the best part is, if we do this well,
we won't get caught!"
They continued on this vein for quite a while. But Remus had stopped listening. He
started paying attention to a conversation between Elizabeth, Lily, Arianna, and a girl that
Remus knew only in passing, a Gryffindor girl by the name of Cheron. Cheron was a friend
of Peter's who was just like him in the way that they both always needed help in all the
easiest subjects. Sirius had already announced his plans on getting them to hook up so "they
could help each other, so I won't have to" as he put it.
They were talking about who they thought would join the Gryffindor quidditch
team and who had the best chances of becoming captain. Tryouts were just a week away.
They knew that at least three people in their year would make it, for the Seeker, one of the
Beaters, and the Keeper would be graduating at the end of the year. Cheron was going on
and on about Peter would make the perfect Keeper. It looked like a one sided discussion to
Remus.
Lily was saying that she was sure that James would get to be Seeker and Remus and
Sirius were surely to be either the Keeper or the Beater. Elizabeth said she wouldn't be
surprised if they chose Remus as Beater. Remus was thinking that if he was picked as Beater
or even Keeper, he could stand a better chance at impressing Elizabeth. He didn't like flying
as well as James and Sirius, and he was sure that James would make Seeker. Sirius was
always going on about some Quidditch team or another.
His thoughts were interrupted when the bell rang to go to his first class, which
happened to be Potions with Sytherin.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~


Remus sat down next to Arianna and started getting his notes out and his cauldron.
Arianna also knew that they were planning something, Sirius had told her. They exchanged
ideas about what it would be. Elizabeth joined in for a while, much to Remus' hidden
delight.
"Maybe they'll accidentally-on-purpose drop their potions on his head. It'd be cool
to see his hair go curly or something." Said Elizabeth. They all laughed as they imagined
Snape with curly hair. Elizabeth giggled and caught Remus' eye for a moment. Remus
smiled and said, "I wonder what they really are going to do." They both looked at James
and Sirius expectantly, but they got no answer. They weren't even paying attention.
James and Sirius were sitting right behind him and looked like they were doing some
very quick thinking. Professor Brohns came in and quieted the class before starting the
lesson.
"Today class, we will be learning how to brew an dissolving solution." Prof. Brohns
said. Remus noticed that Sirius and James looked like Christmas had come early. They both
had enormous grins on their faces.
"Before we can start, we must coat the inside of all the cauldrons with a special anti-
dissolving cream. And as you are adding your ingredients, be careful not to put anything like
your hand into the potion or you will have to go through life with only one hand. You must
also cover your ladles with the cream."
Remus and all of the other students took notes on how to prepare the potion. When
the class started mixing and weighing the ingredients into their cauldrons, he noticed that
James and Sirius were keeping close watch on Snape. If Remus hadn't known them so well,
he wouldn't have known why they were doing this, but he was sure that the conversation he
had heard at breakfast that morning was going to be carried out sooner than he'd expected.
He was wondering when they were going to do whatever they were going to when
Snape said loudly, "Professor, shouldn't we be done adding our ingredients by now? If
some of us were really paying attention," His black eyes glinted in the direction of James and
Sirius who were still adding the ant's eyes to their cauldron, "We'd all be done by now,
wouldn't we?"
Sirius added the last ingredient and quickly said as he slipped his hand into his pocket
where the firework was being kept until the chance came, "You know Snape, some of us pay
attention and take our time while making potions so we won't make mistakes. You would
never know if you made a mistake or not if you hurried. You might have messed up while
weighing an ingredient and it might not work, or worse." He finished with a grin.
Snape glared at Sirius. James and Sirius knew that Snape hated being told that he
could've messed up, especially in Potions, which was his best subject. Thankfully to Remus,
the Professor interrupted before Snape could say anything. He knew that if Sirius were riled
enough, he wouldn't care if a professor heard him or not. Snape knew this too and often
used it to his advantage.
"Come now," said Prof. Brohns, "I'm sure that you have all done very well if you
listened to my directions. We will be testing them later." She waved her wand at the
blackboard and it was magically cleared of the notes they had taken on dissolving potions.
James nudged Sirius and quickly nodded.
"Yes," replied Sirius, " It's time." Snape had turned away from his potion and was
loudly explaining to some Slytherins how he was betting that James and Sirius's potion
would probably turn them into jackrabbits and the Professor was making some notes on her
next lesson. The time was indeed perfect.
Sirius took a quick glance at the Professor, lit the filibuster firework and then
launched it through the air towards Snape's cauldron. They had just enough time to see it
shoot many different colored sparks into the air before the fire-work itself dropped into
Snape's cauldron. Bang. Splash.
The effect it had on the class was labeled "perfect" to Sirius and James, devastating
to everyone else. Some of Snape's potion had eaten through the table and was threatening
to burn holes in Snape's shoes. And the sparks made it impossible for anyone to see exactly
what was going on. For a while, mass confusion reigned.
It took a long time for Professor Brohns to get everything back in order. She had to
restore many chair legs and tabletops that had gotten in the way of the potion. It took a
while for the sparks to go out and Prof. Brohns already thin temper was worn even thinner
by Snape. He was screaming and yelling things like, "Can't you hurry up and get those
things under control?" and muttering "…can't even keep a class under control…When I
teach here, I'll keep my class under control…" And going on about how the school was
going to pay for the holes in his shoes.
James and Sirius had nothing to worry about. They had made sure that the firework
landed in Snape's cauldron, so the Professor wouldn't find it. And even if she did, she
would think that Snape had set it off, not them.
Remsu leaned back towards James and whispered, "Job well done, I guess?"
James looked at him and whispered back, sounding mock-innocent, "What do you
mean? I didn't do anything! Job well done on what?" He looked over at Sirius and added,
"It was Sirius's idea in the first place, he's the mastermind of pranks."
Sirius looked misty eyed and said in a grateful/weepy tone, "And all this because a
few too many drops of slug juice…" and wiped imaginary tears from his eyes.
"Few?!?!" said James.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~


For Remus, the week of Exams seemed to never want to end, but pretty soon it did.
James had ended up with top scores in Transfiguration and Lily had the best scores in
Charms. Second in Transfiguration but first in Astronomy was Sirius. He had actually done
some last minute studying on Potions so he had done all right in there too. Peter had
squeaked by with a LOT of help from Sirius, James and Remus.
Remus was so shocked when he found out that he had the highest score in Defense
of Against the Dark Arts, he almost started laughing.
"Top scores in the class that is teaching me to destroy myself, interesting," he
thought to himself.
He had also made top scores in Herbology but that wasn't nearly as satisfying as
DADA. Jazlyn had made the next to highest grade in Herbology and had mockingly taken
offence that Remus had gotten a higher score than her.
"Maybe she'll ask for some help next year," thought Remus.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

On the train ride back to London at the end of the year, Remus was in worse spirits
than he had been all year. He was going to have to go back to his home in Oxford. His
mother had wanted to move to a muggle town instead of a wizarding one because she
thought that Remus would be safe there.
Remus and Sirius were playing Exploding Snap and James was telling Remus that he
had better work on the map over the summer or he would send him a box full of pre-timed
dungbombs. Remus just hoped that he was joking about it and mentally reminded himself
to work on it over the summer.
Remus was sure that Sirius's would lay down a card that would explode soon, when
Snape burst into the compartment looking more sour than usual.
"Alright Potter! Black! What did you do to Medusa?!? I know you did something
to her!" he hissed at them.
"Who's-," Remus started, but Snape cut him off.
"And you!! I bet you're in on the joke as well, aren't you? Each of you always
knows exactly what the other two are planning! But you went too far this time!!! I want
Medusa back and I want her back now!!" He stood there, looking from one confused face
to the others and back again. A pink tinge was showing under his normally pale face.
"Who-What is Medusa?" Remus asked again.
"Yeah," said James, "And what did we supposedly do to it?"
"Who cares?" said Sirius, shuffling some Exploding Snap cards, "Exploding Snap
anyone?"
"For your information, Medusa is my cat," said Snape, looking suspicious, "didn't
you know that?"
"No, so how could we have done anything to her?" said Remus.
But before Snape could answer, a shriek came from the corridor and everyone
looked toward the door.
"What the-" said Sirius, who had stopped shuffling the cards.
Remus leaned out the door and looked down the hall in the direction that the shriek
had come from. He looked either way and was almost beheaded by a muddy black blur as it
came barreling down the hall.
"Severus!" a voice form the hall called. Someone appeared in the door, frowned at
Remus and the others and stared at Snape questioningly. The four Gryfinndor's knew him
vaguely as one of the Slytherins who followed Snape around all the time.
"I, uh, just wanted to tell you," he glanced at Sirius as he spoke, looking irritated.
"We found your cat. We just can't catch her. She was hiding behind some trunks in the
luggage car, and we reached back there to get her. But Medusa gave Aideen and the rest of
us some nasty scratches and ran off down the hall. Have you seen which way she went?"
Snape ignored the question. "Who let her out of her cage then?" he asked.
"I don't know," he answered, "But Medusa's putting up a fight."
Snape looked thoughtful for a moment and said, "Well, we'll just have to catch her,
then. She headed off down that way, Iago," he pointed down the hall, "Go tell the others
and look for her down there."
The Slytherin boy named Iago nodded and went down the hall to get the others.
Snape looked to see where he went and then turned back to Remus and the others.
"Tell me the truth," he said to them, "Did you or didn't you let her out? Did you
once again want a laugh that only making my life a living Hell can satisfy?"
"Yep. We just wanted to return the favor for all the times you've done the exact
same thing to us." Sirius said coolly, "But we hadn't thought of what to do to you yet.
Thanks for the idea." He grabbed the deck of exploding Snap cards off the seat and said,
"Exploding Snape anyone?" He shoved the deck into Snape's face, pushed him out into the
corridor and shut the door just in time to hear the resounding bang come from behind it.
"Wonderful," said Peter.
"Beautiful," applauded Remus, laughing.
"Couldn't have done it better if I'd have done it myself," said James.

* * * * * *

Part Two: Demon Among the Angels
(The Summertime.)

One night that summer, Remus was up working on the map. He hadn't been able to
sleep for one reason or another. He glanced out his window at the almost full moon. Three
days…he thought. Strange, before, I was never able to remember when the full moon was,
but now, he laughed grimly, I guess I have no choice.
He had just added the entrance to the prefects' bathroom to the third floor, when he
heard something outside his door. It sounded like someone was trying without success to
pass without being heard. Why not? He thought, getting up from his bed. He knew it was
his mother, but it was also pass midnight and there was something in the way she had
walked that Remus knew that something was totally wrong.
He silently crept down the second floor hall after her. Remembering to step over
the creaky 4th step, he made his way down the staircase. Remus stopped a few steps from
the bottom, listening.
His mother was in the living room off to the left, talking to someone who sounded
like he must be a ministry wizard.
"-wanted to talk to me, sir?" came his mother's voice, soft and lilting, like the wind.
He had always loved his mother's voice, but hated when it was full of sorrow, for it
reminded Remus of when his father had left them.
"Yes," said the other voice, slightly nasal and with an oddly clipped tone, "It's about
your husband. After he, ahem, left," Remus bristled, "he didn't remarry. I was ordered to
tell his closest of family…um…"
"Yes?" urged Remus' mother, sounding anxious to hear any news of her long gone
husband.
"Unfortunately, his body was found at the site of a mass murder in Kent. He was
one of the three in the number of deceased who we can still identify. We suspect that the
murders were done by a cult who names themselves the "Death Eaters." He was a victim of
the Cruacius Curse." By now, Remus' mother was sobbing into her handkerchief. Remus
quietly resisted the urge to go and comfort her. The ministry official tried unsuccessfully to
give her his condolences. Remus stopped listening, he had heard more than enough.
Remus quickly went back up to his room, and sat on his bed. The map lay forgotten
near the foot. So my father is dead, he thought, I guess I'm supposed to show some grief, as
his son. So why don't I feel any? Remus knew the answer before he had finished the
thought itself. I hate him, that's why, answered his mind angrilly. He left us, left his wife
and child!! Just one night, up and left us to fend for ourselves. Remus pounded his pillow to
vent some of the anger, which was coursing through him. He was NEVER there for me,
NEVER there for my mom, NEVER did anything except what would help him to gain
power in the ministry.
Not even a real father, he thought. In spite of Remus' feelings of hate, his eyes
brimmed with tears. Why? He asked himself, what did I do to deserve a father who cares
nothing for me? What made the heavens single me out as the one to never have a father?
Because, said a small insistant voice in the back of his mind, because of who and
*what* you are. You are a monster, and who can blame him for leaving a *monster*? Remus
pounded his pillow once more before he collapsed onto it.
*Why?*

* * * * * *

A/N:: I know what you're thinking. BO-RING!! Yes, I know. Remus doesn't act
like you'd expect him too. And I have always had trouble pairing him with anyone except
me…truly.
If you're wondering where I got the names:
Cheron=Ferry keeper of the River Styx in Greek Mythology
Iago= Shakespeare character, Stabs his boss in the back and runs for it.
Medusa= If you don't already know it, you're sunk.

The Ministry member is Fudge. Fudge, how I loathe thee. How I'd like to get my
hands on him, just for one minute…it wouldn't even take that long for me to kill him….
Well, I WAS hoping that this might turn out to be a romance fic, but it's not exactly
going as I planned. My muse left me to go south. She said it was too cold here, I agree.
Well, I'm going to go somewheres else now. Don't wait up; you may be waiting for quite
some time…
Traci of the Wild Magic };)