who the *)&% is THAT?!
A murmur spread through the market place as a tall figure walked into the archery shop. he was wearing a strange black armor the likes of witch had never been seen in all of Hyrule, and what an abject that speared to be some kind of club was strapped to his back.
"do you have a bow sir?" asked the disgustingly un-kept man behind the counter
"I have a weapon"
"alright then, ten rupees"
"I don't have rupees, will yen do?"
"yen?"
the strange figure place a coin on the counter.
the owner picked it up and bit it
never seen a metal like this before, i suppose it'll do, but next time bring REAL currency"
the man nodded and drew the club from his back and pointed it toward the target range ass the machine revved up.
an oversized rupee shot up as the man took aim
as the rupee peek the man whispered "die" and a blast was heard. a small unit flew from the club and the rupee shattered
this continued until they were all destroyed
"h-heres your prize sir" the owner stuttered and handed him a purple rupee
"thank you" came the reply
"w-what is that thing?"
"Its called a tek-9. its an assault rifle .. kind of like a more deadly bow"
he left without saying another word, slipping the small purple gem into a pocket and proceeded toward the castle.
"freeze!"
"oh, are you a guard? im hear to see the forest boy, I was informed he was here"
"im not at liberty to give you that information, now unless you have an appointment I'll have to ask you to leave"
3 seconds later the body of the guard was on the ground unconscious
at last he had come to his destination
"are you the forest boy?"
the young child in green nodded
my boss says hes been getting some complaints
the boy said nothing but his fairy started bitching
"hey! who do you think you are? i out go ghetto on your ass! come on, ill take you on! go on link! kick his ass! use your sword and kill him! c'mon lets fight well show you who's boss!"
the man drew the tek-9 from his back and shot round after round into the fairy
the young boy looked at the lump of light on the ground shocked
"im sorry boy, but I have my orders"
he looked up at the man then began to run up to him
he began to go into defense mode but instead of attacking, the young boy hugged the crap out of him
"!!!!!?"
hours later he was standing in Hyrule field as he chanted an incantation the made a symbol similar to a triangle at his feet
a beam appeared around him
"hailing pioneer 2, mission complete, Zelda no long has *z-targeting* without this sale will lower and Sega will begin to overtake Nintendo in the adventure rpg platform."
"very good telipipe up and well head over to crash bandicoot"
the beam lit up and he was gone
?end?