Larry Podder

by S.Q. Psyc

Ch.1

Larry Podder was an average boy. Except he lived with his mean
aunt and uncle. And he had a star shaped scar on his forhead. Okay, he
was weird. So I lied. Sue me. My lawyers are ready for a legal battle!
Bring it on! Sorry, sorry. I lost control.
AAAAAAAnyhoo, Larry came from the tiny closet he lived in, and
into the kitchen for breakfast. He sat down, and dug into his pancakes.
"Hmmm," he said, his mouth full, "You don't usually give me the
pancakes, Auntie."
"I didn't" she told him "I found an old matress in the dump, so
I cut some patties out of it."
"Well that's better than my usual breakfast."
I don't think you want to know what he usually had for breakfast.
Larry's cousin Spudley waddled into the kitchen holding a shampoo
bottle. He hit Larry on the head with it. Larry fell into his matress
patties.
"Here's some real pancakes for you, pumkin," the Aunt told him.
Mean old Uncle came into the kitchen. "What happened to him?"
He asked, gesturing to Larry.
"I hit him with a shampoo bottle," Spudley said, as if this was
perfectly normal.
"No, son," Uncle said very sincerly, "You don't hit your cousin
with shampoo. A brick takes him down much faster."
Uncle picked up a newspaper. "Stupid government," he mumbled.
Larry started to get up. Uncle hit him with a particularly large
brick.