Hidy again! Here is day two!
Thanks to everyone who helped me with this!!!
usual disclaimers apply -- yeah, you know this routine
************************************
~*~ Pink Haired Trouble~*~
Part: Day Two
Authors: Bethany - Bethany212@aol.com
Serenity Raye - LilBit8318@aol.com
Don - doniswong@hotmail.com
Pete - devons@direct.ca
Zeeder - Zeedercat@aol.com
MoonAngel14 - LoveMoonAngel14@yahoo.com
Editor: Starsinger
Rating: PG (language)
************************************
~*~ Day Two ~*~
"Rei-chan?" a sweet voice beckoned. Rei looked down to find a head full
of pink hair and cinnimin eyes staring at her. Taking a deep breath, Rei
smiled.
"Hai, Small Lady?"
The small princess looked quite upset over something. She paced for a
moment, her diaper making "swooshing" noices while she gathered her thoughts.
"What is the dirty deed?"
Oh yeah. Our former preistess was NOT ready for this one. The urge to
laugh came to mind, but quickly deminished when she saw Chibi-Usa watching her
carefully. Bending down to eye level, Rei looked Chibi-Usa in the face. "It's
a form of wrestling."
Blank stare.
Sighing, Rei began again. "It's where two people who... care for each other
play a wrestling game."
Chibi-Usa's eyes brightened. "Just like Mommy and Daddy! and they even looked
as red as Mommy does when I see her doing it!!"
Biting her tougue so hard that she was sure it would bleed, Rei manged to
disguse her giggle as a cough - a high pitched cough - but one nonetheless. "Umm,
yeah Small Lady; like mommy and daddy."
Happy with the answer and at her understanding of said events, Chibi-Usa
hugged Rei breifly. "I think Haruka won... Daddy always does!" and with that
said, she was off.
Quiet.
Strangely quiet.
The entire palace seemed to breathe relief from not having a screaming,
crying, or giggling three year old running through the halls.
Except for the senshi. For them, this was *worse* than her running a muck
through the halls.
This meant she was into something and they needed to find her, fast.
"Where'd you last see her?" Minako asked Rei as they walked briskly
through the palace halls.
"This morning. She was asking something about the 'dirty deed'?" Rei
raised an eyebrow at our now blushing profusly senshi of love and beauty.
"Ummmm, what did you tell her?"
"Wrestling."
"Good choice," Minako commented, entering a room.
Little did the senshi and former preitess know, but our cute little
princess was happily watching Animanics in Rei's bedroom.
Now, why would this be a problem? It's just a cartoon for crying out
loud - no biggie!
Wrong.
As Chibi-Usa watched one called 'plucky duck' go across the screen and
throw toilet paper in the toliet and flush - over and over and over and over,
a light bulb went off in her small head.
Glancing over at the box of Rei's anti-evil charms, Chibi-Usa made a
beeline for the bathroom at the end of the hall.
Meeting in the conference room in the basement of the palace, the
senshi set up their game plan.
"MINAKO!!" Makoto tapped a stick on the blonde's head. "PAY ATTENTION!"
Grumpling angerily, Minako got up. "I'm going to look, I suggest you all
do the same."
Makoto watched in something close to horror, although more on the edge of
embarrassment, as every last senshi in the room filed out the door after Minako.
"Fine then! I gotta go to the john anyhow!"
Marching down the halls, Makoto turned in the first hallway she came to and
started toward the end.
*SLOSH*
Looking down, our amazon senshi knew exactly what it was at her feet, but where
it was coming from is what puzzled her.
It seemed to be coming from EVERYWHERE.
Every room down the hall had water leaking from under the doorways. "Oh
shimatta," she grumbled, getting her communicator out. "Minna, problem in sector
three."
The senshi arrived shortly, and found water slowly making it's way down
the stairs.
"What the hell?" Rei stuttered, opening a door.
Now picture if you will, a rather large bathroom, nice gold trimming,
big crystal vases full of roses... water on the floor spilling from the toliet...
anti-evil charms swimming in the liquid.
"I'M GOING TO GET HER!!!!!!"
Saturn, who had been fairly quiet until this point, spoke up, "I suggest
calling in the recruits." The others looked at her strangly, then smiled.
"Right! I'll call them!" Minako shoved Chibi-Usa at Michiru then ran off,
Makoto on her heels.
"I'll help Rei with her um..." Haruka gestured towards the bathroom and the
others nodded. Just then an odd oder began wafting through the room.
"When was the last time she had a bath?" Michiru asked.
"I think it was yesterday morning, why?" Hotaru said.
"Causesheneedsonebadhere!" Michiru said and thrust the girl at Hotaru
then rushed out, Setsuna close behind.
Ami began sneaking out when she found a sharp blade at her throat.
"Don't even think about it. You're in this with me."
"A plumber," *splosh!* "One thousand freakin' la-di-da years, millions
of intense battles, and in the end - just a no-good plumber!!!" *splosh!*
"And then to top it off - four bathrooms!! Four!!!"
Haruka's complaining was just about to wear Rei's patience to a nub in
about... oh wait, NOW.
"Now listen here blondie!" the fiery senshi yelled while grabbing the
other woman's collar, "I've had it up to HERE with your incessant complaining!
If you don't quit flapping that smart ass jaw of yours and get plumbing, I'm
going to take this plunger and shove it into your mouth sideways so you'll be able
to swallow a turkey WHOLE! Do I make myself clear?!"
"Ummmm, yeah?"
Just then, a loud "WEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" and a blur of pink hair streaked past
the open bathroom door. It was followed immediately by two "GET BACK HEREs" and one
*slip!* However, before Hotaru could completely fall, she latched onto the door
frame and steadied herself... at the expense of the door frame.
**CRASH!!**
Hotaru blushed. "Gomen nasai... You were thinking about replacing that
weren't you?"
If Rei's face wasn't red enough before, now it was. It looked like some
kind of volcano erupted. "OH GREAT PEOPLE! JUST TEAR APART MY ROOM WHILE YOU'RE
HERE!!! WHY DON'T YOU JUST HAVE A POOL PARTY IN HERE OR SOMETHING?!"
Backing off from her plumbing job, Haruka whispered to Hotaru, "I
think she's mad."
"Yup, no doubt about that one."
Just as Rei was about to launch into a plethroa of explictives, Ami
entered and broke up the commotion. "I'd really like some help, please? The
daimo- I mean Small Lady, is using the wet floor like a gigantic Slip n' Slide.
She naked, wet, lathered with soap, and VERY slippery!"
Hey, anything to get away from Rei. Haruka and Hotaru made a quick exit
to the Slip n' Sl- I mean, palace halls.
Meanwhile...
"At last! Some rest!" Setsun flopped down onto a bench, followed
closely by Michiru.
"Yeah, I know what you mean. Who would have thought a child would be
that troublesome?!"
"Remember Hotaru when she was young?"
"Mm hm. Our Hime-chan was such a sweet little child, such an angel.
She never did anything like this."
"No, never."
"If anything, she helped us with our li-"
Suddenly the calm was shattered by another "WEEEEEEEEEE!" and a zoom
of pink hair. A very pissed off Hotaru was not far behind, "GET YOUR PUNY
LITTLE *(&@#$ BACK *&^$*&ING HERE THIS ^&$%ING INSTANT OR I'M GOING TO &*^$#ING
TEAR YOU A &!@#ING NEW @$$HOLE!!!"
Michiru and Setsuna glanced at each other and asked simontaneously,
"Where did she learn THAT?!"
Minako and Makoto passed each other as they paced back and forth in the
teleportation room. Each second was more than likely bringing forth more
distruction on the palace than the Black Moon Family would one day. And with
each passing moment, Minako grew more worried. Finally a light began in three
of the portals, and figures started forming.
"YATEN-KUN!!! THANK KAMI-SAMA!! WE'RE SAVED!!" Minako squealed, hugging
Yaten around the throat to where, try as he might, there was NO point in trying
to breathe.
"What seems to be the problem?" Seiya asked, slightly annoyed with being
woke up(remember, they're in another galaxy) to take care of the senshi's
'immediate emergency that can't wait another second.'
"Umm... you'll see," Makoto said, dragging Taiki out the door, Yaten, Minako
and Seiya in tow.
Do you ever get that sinking feeling? I mean, when like you walk into
a room and you're LITERALLY sinking because the floor is flooded?
No? Well, I haven't, that's for sure. Safe to say, our new friends, the
Lights, never has such a sensation either.
"Uhhh, Mina-chan?" asked Yaten, "What's going on?"
Before the blonde could answer, the water rippled and shook. It was slow
and subtle at first, so slight that even Seiya thought it was his imagination.
But soon, it was unmistakable: something was coming.
"WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" Ahhh, the miracles of a Slip n' Slide.
"What the hell was that?!"
Eyes were nearly bulging out of the Starlights sockets; was that the
princess sliding down the palace halls as naked as the day she was born?! A
storm of senshi came falling by shortly afterwards.
Apparently, they were chasing the little girl.
Taiki elbowed his brother. "We're seeing things, right?"
Seiya only replied, "I hope so."
Anyway, Minako (from out of nowhere I might add) handed each of the Lights
a towel, a set of clothes, and a diaper. "Your mision -- which you have no choice
in accepting or refusing -- is to capture, dry, change, and feed Small Lady. May the
best Senshi win..."
Just as she was about to walk away, she added, "And it might interest you
gentlemen to know that the teleportation room has been locked, sealed, barricaded,
armed, fortified, and guarded. Makoto," the brunete gave a curt nod, "has seen
to those things the second you stepped into the palace. Don't think about escaping;
it's impossible."
Begrudingly, Yaten handed Seiya a thick wad of cash. The latter smirked
and said, "I told you Yaten. Maybe next time, you'll wisen up and not answer her call."
"Ready?"
"Ready!"
"Set?"
"...."
"Taiki!!!"
"Okay, okay... Set!"
"GO!!!"
In corner one, standing five feet two inches, we have Sailor Star
Healer - KKKOOOUUUU YATEN!!
Corner two, standing three feet two inches, weighing in at an incrediable
31 pounds -- Neo-Princess of the Moon and Earth -- CCCCCHHHHHIIIIBBBAAA Usagi!!!
*DING!* And they're off!
Towels forgotten, Yaten made a grab as he passed Small Lady. Notice the
word "passed". In a frail attempt at grabbing her, he knocked off his
well structured (or just plain lucky) balance and fell face forward, still
sailing down the marble hallway at about 30 kmph.
Whizing by a freaked out looking Rei, Yaten slammed into the wall
head first and went unconscience.
"One down, two to go," Rei mumbled, pulling Yaten through the water and into
the side room to save him from any other crashes that was more than likely to be
made.
*DING DING*
Now contestant number two, Kou Seiya, takes the ropes!
Carefully he threaded through the water, closing in on Chibi-Usa; who was sitting
in the middle of the hallway, giggling at Yaten's show.
Just in the nick of time, she looked up and moved to the right. The sudden
shock of the movement caused Seiya to loose his balance and fall to the ground
with a *splash!*
"Seiya funny!" Chibi-Usa giggled, pointing a chubby finger at Seiya's soaked
form on the floor.
Her naked bottom dissappeared down the hallway as she made her escape.
Chibi-Usa: 2
Starlights: 0
Taiki looked forward. Honestly, he had never imagined that he would loose
his balance so early in the game. Infact, at the exact moment Yaten took off.
But then again, he wasn't expecting Yaten to use him as a push board to gain
speed - inturn pushing him onto the wet floor. Trying again, he successfully managed
to get up without sliding.
And then, IT happened.
Chibi-Usa smashed right into the just-now-gaining-his-balance-senshi in an
act that would have made her mother proud. Both Sailor Star Maker and Princess of
the Moon and Earth went down in a giant *splash* that caused the waves of water
to hit against Rei's feet as she stood in the doorway of her bedroom (without a
door frame) watching.
"YES!!!!!!" Taiki screamed, bringing senshi to the hallway from every
angle. Holding up the small child like a prize, he announced, "I DONE IT!!!!!!"
"So..." said Minako.
"Yup..." said Haruka.
"Mmmmm..." said Rei.
"I guess," said Ami.
"Come on! It's not that hard! Just tell me what food you want me to make!"
Makoto pointed to the two piles, "It's either carrots or peas! Carrots or Peas!
How hard can that be?!"
"Well whatever you desicion is, make it quick. I think the Small Terror is about to
break free," Michiru added, sticking her head in the doorway.
"Carrots," Hotaru said, and Makoto smiled and began cooking. The rest of the group
filed out to watch the small girl. She was happily chewing on her bread.
"How did you manage to keep her seated?" Ami asked the Lights.
"The miricles of duck tape," Taiki said smiling. Upon closer inspection
the group noticed the Small Terror was indeed straped to the chair, and the
chair was strapped to the table.
"Lunch!" Makoto announced, placing a plate of food in front of her.
Smiling, Chibi-Usa tossed her bread at Makoto, hitting her on the head. Then
turning back to the plate of food, she began to eat. Slowly popping the chicken
nuggets into her mouth, she smiled happily.
Accidently dropping one, she went to reach it but the large amounts of
duck tape prevented much movement. Tears began to well up in her eyes. Sighing,
Makoto went to pick it up.
It was that little mistake that started it all.
When asked later, no one could exactly remember that weekend. They
remembered before and after, but that exact moment was never remembered. What happened
afterwards, however, was unforgettable.
Chibi-Usa eating happily.
Makoto picking up nugget.
Suddenly --
**SPLAT!!**
The plate of food fell onto Makoto's head, covering her with applesauce,
nuggets, ketchup, cabbage, and those darn carrots.
Makoto looked up, stunned, a blob of ketchup running down her face.
The rest of the group stared in shock.
Yaten walked slowly up to Makoto, trying not to smile. Reaching a hand up, he
grabbed a nugget off her shoulder and wipping some ketchup off her face, took
a bite. "Tastes good Mako-chan, but red really isn't your color." He ducked just
in time to avoid her fist.
"COME BACK HERE!!" she screamed, dashing after him. Everyone turned towards
the two racing around the room. Suddenly Yaten stopped, dead. Makoto smashed into
him.
"What?!"
"Look!" he pointed to the table. Makoto followed his lead. "What? I don't see
anything!"
"That's the problem, she's gone!"
Ignoring the child missing factor, Makoto and Yaten got into a fight. Food
fight to be exact. While the rest of the senshi slowly but surely crept out of the
room, the two fighters duked it out with catsup (or ketchup), mustard (or that
yellow stuff), nuggets (or chicken refuse), and those darned carrots. The end
result was a Yaten- who looked like a salad, and a Makoto- who looked like a
Ronald McDonald.
So just what WAS our queen and king up to while all this was going on,
unknown to them both?
"Usako..."
"Mmmmm..."
"USA!!!"
"Oh Mamo-chan!!"
"USAKO!!!"
"Ooooooo... OUCH!! Dammit Mamo-chan! Get it! Get it!"
"LET GO OF ME AND I WILL!"
"IT BIT ME!!!!!! WAAAAAAAA!!"
Endymion snatched the baby bird out of Serenity's hand and let it
go, then proceeded to nurse her bite mark. (what did you think they were
doing? Geesh, get your head out of the gutter!! ^_^)
"The skin didn't break Usa, you'll be fine." And instantly she
stopped crying and looked at her hand.
Taking a deep breath, Endymion wondered slightly if this was
worth un-interrupted sex. "Let's go back to the suite, okay?"
Nodding, Serenity started to walk, then stopped. "Mamo-chan?"
"Yes, Usako?"
"Do you have the map?"
Silence.
Meanwhile, back at the palace....
After calling a temporary truce, the warring parties absconded to the
showers, intent on cleaning themselves before anyone saw them.
Now, with Yaten being a singer and all in his day, it's understandable
that he'd have make-up with him. Afterall, make-up is what got all those
legendary bands like Hole and Marilyn Manson famous. It sort of became a ritual
for him; he used stage make-up to have himself look more... presentable...
espcially around Minako.
As the water cascaded from the showerhead, Yaten began singing some old
tunes fairly loudly. So loud, in fact, that he didn't hear the bathroom door
open, nor did he hear the slight pitter patter of feet on tile.
"Take me home tonight! I don't want to let you go to see the light!
Take me home tonight-"
While Eddie Money raged on in the man's voice, Chibi-Usa scaled the sink
and opened the mirror cabinet.
Inside was the usual toliettries like shaving cream, and such; the girl
knew it as Daddy's Stuff. Nothing interesting... except for a little black bag.
Curiously, she opened it, revealing everything from gel hair removers to
nose clippers to eye shadow. Well, of course our Small Lady hadn't been subjected
to the wonders of make-up yet. She thought the gel as syrup, the eye shadow as gravy,
the hair spray as aerosal canned cheese, and the *cringe* lipstick as... you
guessed it, one of those old, old Push Pops.
*CHOMP* *MUNCH* *GULP*
Meanwhile, Yaten was still singing, "I need some company! I'm gonna need you!
I need to hold you when the cold winds blow!! Take me home tonight! I don't
wanna let you-"
*CRUNCH*
"What the hell was that?"
Immediately, he thought that Minako had somehow snuck into the bathroom
to get romantic with him. Yeah right, wishful thinking.
"Mina-chan, honey, darling... Is that you?"
Not hearing an answer, our hero strode out of the shower... only to see
Chibi-Usa with her mouth covered in hair care products and make-up.
Everyone was still. Chibi-Usa looked like a girl caught in a pair of
headlights and Yaten looked... well, pretty stupid.
Suddenly, the little girl giggled and said, "Yaten-chan wrestling with
Mina-chan!!!"
Quiet perplexed at the statement, Yaten looked down and realized that
ummmmm, he had anticiapated Minako's arrival and well... was more than just a
little excited. The little girl's words made sense... in one of those bad ways.
But wrestling?! Where did she learn THAT one?!
But first things first. Our hero gracefully yanked the shower curtain
off the shower to cover himself. Now, if only he hadn't yanked so hard, the metal
beam holding up the curtain wouldn't have come off and knocked him out cold.
Yaten was found five minutes later by Minako. He was unconscious, wet and
shocked.
Sometime later... after Yaten managed clothes....
The rest of the senshi, including the now clean Makoto, peered in
the room.
"Ummm, why do you have make-up?" Minako asked as Ami brushed by, checking
the small girl over.
"It's stage make-up!" The others looked at him strangely. "It is! It was
left over from the whole Three Lights thing." Still the staring continued. "Stop
looking at me like that! It was!!" Picking up the slimy containers, he dropped them
in the trash. "This is all your fault!" he turned around to the small pink haired child.
Looking up at Yaten, her eyes widdened and she rushed towards the others.
Seiya picked her up, patting her back gently. "There, there - it's okay. No need
to be afraid of the strange man."
"Strange man..." she giggled, sucking her thumb. Laying her head on
Seiya's shoulder, one might have thought she would go to sleep...
"Awwwww she drooled on me!" Holding her out, he looked down at his
shirt. "And this was my best shirt too!"
But not for long...
You see, dear readers, you can't eat make-up and there be no reprocusions.
It's just not possible. And you most definitly can't eat make-up then be tossed
around. The result of such a combination? I think that's pretty clear.
"EWWWWWWWW!!!!!!" Seiya cried as suddenly Yaten's make-up decided
to make another apperance.
Smiling, Yaten took Chibi-Usa back, while Seiya went to clean himself up.
"Such a good girl! Yes you are!" Tossing her into the air, he laughed.
"Ummm, I don't think that's such a good idea..." Minako warned, but was
cut off by Makoto shoving her hair towel over her head and tying it.
"You have such a way with children," Makoto said, smiling smugly.
Can you guess what's coming?
Ready?
1...
2...
3...
"EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!" Yaten stopped tossing Chibi-Usa as the rest of
his make-up re-appeared.
Makoto smiled, "You know what Yaten. That really isn't your color. You
should consider a new line." Taking Chibi-Usa, she left the room giggling.
Yaten rushed into the bathroom, desprate to get cleaned up. Haruka
and Michiru left together, perhapes to 'wrestle' some more. Ami and Taiki decided
to find some research on child development. Hotaru, Rei and Setsuna decided it was
lunch time.
And Minako?
Well she began wandering down the hall, bumping into things. "Hey guys!"
she called. "Can you help me? I ow--" She ran into a doorway. "I can't see!" She
stumbled about. "MINNA!??!"
Makoto had put Chibi-Usa down for her nap. A few moments after the pink
haired child was asleep, so was Makoto.
Everything was quiet in the palace, too quiet... and we all know what
happens when things are too quiet.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" a scream prierced through the comfortable silence
that had settled over the palace. Starting, Makoto sat up looking around.
"Is someone in trouble...?" she muttered looking around. Suddenly she
saw it.
"Awwww crap!" Makoto punched the wall then rushed out of the room.
Yup, Chibi-Usa was on the rampage again.
Following her insticts, or maybe it was the screams, Makoto rushed
down the hall. On the way she spotted Minako.
"Venus, we don't have time for these games," she said, grabbing her
friends arm and continueing down the hallway.
Finally the two reached the orgin of the screms. Taiki's room.
Pushing the door open, Makoto rushed inside expecting to find blood,
a dead courpse, army of youma...
Instead she saw...
... Nothing.
"What's all the screaming about!?!" she demanded, looking around.
"The brat ruined my books!" Taiki tossed one towards Makoto, but missed
and hit Minako in the head.
"Owww!" she squealed.
"Take the stupid towel off your head!" Makoto sighed, yanking it off.
Then picking up the book, she leafed through it. "So, it's just colorful
now. What's the big deal?"
"The big deal?! The big deal?!?! The big deal is that these books
have been in the family for generations! Their priceless!"
"Got that right..." Minako muttered, looking at the crayon drawings.
"I heard... wait! Where's the others?!" He glanced around. "There should
be two more..." Suddenly his gaze turned towards the bathroom. The child seemed
to have an afinty for water... rushing over he looked and sure enough, two books
were found floating in the toilet.
"Eww.. " Minako sneered as Taiki fished the books out.
"Just great! When I get my hands on her..."
"Taiki! She's just a child! She doesn't know any better!" Makoto looked
around, "Speaking of which. Where is she?"
"I dunno, haven't seen her - or anything - for a while," Minako
said.
"This is bad! It's getting late out," he looked towards the window
at the now darkening sky.
Just then, as if on cue, a beeping noise interrupted them.
"We have a major problem here!" Setsuna cried, "Someone has went
through the time gate!"
"But who could have gotten into..." Minako trailed off.
"CHIBI-USA!!!" the three cried.
And so dear readers, we begin a new journey.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Is this funny? Stupid? Are we wacko? (please don't answer the latter)
We like email!! and feedback!! Please??!??!!
We want YOU to tell us what you think!!
Thanks to everyone who helped me with this!!!
usual disclaimers apply -- yeah, you know this routine
************************************
~*~ Pink Haired Trouble~*~
Part: Day Two
Authors: Bethany - Bethany212@aol.com
Serenity Raye - LilBit8318@aol.com
Don - doniswong@hotmail.com
Pete - devons@direct.ca
Zeeder - Zeedercat@aol.com
MoonAngel14 - LoveMoonAngel14@yahoo.com
Editor: Starsinger
Rating: PG (language)
************************************
~*~ Day Two ~*~
"Rei-chan?" a sweet voice beckoned. Rei looked down to find a head full
of pink hair and cinnimin eyes staring at her. Taking a deep breath, Rei
smiled.
"Hai, Small Lady?"
The small princess looked quite upset over something. She paced for a
moment, her diaper making "swooshing" noices while she gathered her thoughts.
"What is the dirty deed?"
Oh yeah. Our former preistess was NOT ready for this one. The urge to
laugh came to mind, but quickly deminished when she saw Chibi-Usa watching her
carefully. Bending down to eye level, Rei looked Chibi-Usa in the face. "It's
a form of wrestling."
Blank stare.
Sighing, Rei began again. "It's where two people who... care for each other
play a wrestling game."
Chibi-Usa's eyes brightened. "Just like Mommy and Daddy! and they even looked
as red as Mommy does when I see her doing it!!"
Biting her tougue so hard that she was sure it would bleed, Rei manged to
disguse her giggle as a cough - a high pitched cough - but one nonetheless. "Umm,
yeah Small Lady; like mommy and daddy."
Happy with the answer and at her understanding of said events, Chibi-Usa
hugged Rei breifly. "I think Haruka won... Daddy always does!" and with that
said, she was off.
Quiet.
Strangely quiet.
The entire palace seemed to breathe relief from not having a screaming,
crying, or giggling three year old running through the halls.
Except for the senshi. For them, this was *worse* than her running a muck
through the halls.
This meant she was into something and they needed to find her, fast.
"Where'd you last see her?" Minako asked Rei as they walked briskly
through the palace halls.
"This morning. She was asking something about the 'dirty deed'?" Rei
raised an eyebrow at our now blushing profusly senshi of love and beauty.
"Ummmm, what did you tell her?"
"Wrestling."
"Good choice," Minako commented, entering a room.
Little did the senshi and former preitess know, but our cute little
princess was happily watching Animanics in Rei's bedroom.
Now, why would this be a problem? It's just a cartoon for crying out
loud - no biggie!
Wrong.
As Chibi-Usa watched one called 'plucky duck' go across the screen and
throw toilet paper in the toliet and flush - over and over and over and over,
a light bulb went off in her small head.
Glancing over at the box of Rei's anti-evil charms, Chibi-Usa made a
beeline for the bathroom at the end of the hall.
Meeting in the conference room in the basement of the palace, the
senshi set up their game plan.
"MINAKO!!" Makoto tapped a stick on the blonde's head. "PAY ATTENTION!"
Grumpling angerily, Minako got up. "I'm going to look, I suggest you all
do the same."
Makoto watched in something close to horror, although more on the edge of
embarrassment, as every last senshi in the room filed out the door after Minako.
"Fine then! I gotta go to the john anyhow!"
Marching down the halls, Makoto turned in the first hallway she came to and
started toward the end.
*SLOSH*
Looking down, our amazon senshi knew exactly what it was at her feet, but where
it was coming from is what puzzled her.
It seemed to be coming from EVERYWHERE.
Every room down the hall had water leaking from under the doorways. "Oh
shimatta," she grumbled, getting her communicator out. "Minna, problem in sector
three."
The senshi arrived shortly, and found water slowly making it's way down
the stairs.
"What the hell?" Rei stuttered, opening a door.
Now picture if you will, a rather large bathroom, nice gold trimming,
big crystal vases full of roses... water on the floor spilling from the toliet...
anti-evil charms swimming in the liquid.
"I'M GOING TO GET HER!!!!!!"
Saturn, who had been fairly quiet until this point, spoke up, "I suggest
calling in the recruits." The others looked at her strangly, then smiled.
"Right! I'll call them!" Minako shoved Chibi-Usa at Michiru then ran off,
Makoto on her heels.
"I'll help Rei with her um..." Haruka gestured towards the bathroom and the
others nodded. Just then an odd oder began wafting through the room.
"When was the last time she had a bath?" Michiru asked.
"I think it was yesterday morning, why?" Hotaru said.
"Causesheneedsonebadhere!" Michiru said and thrust the girl at Hotaru
then rushed out, Setsuna close behind.
Ami began sneaking out when she found a sharp blade at her throat.
"Don't even think about it. You're in this with me."
"A plumber," *splosh!* "One thousand freakin' la-di-da years, millions
of intense battles, and in the end - just a no-good plumber!!!" *splosh!*
"And then to top it off - four bathrooms!! Four!!!"
Haruka's complaining was just about to wear Rei's patience to a nub in
about... oh wait, NOW.
"Now listen here blondie!" the fiery senshi yelled while grabbing the
other woman's collar, "I've had it up to HERE with your incessant complaining!
If you don't quit flapping that smart ass jaw of yours and get plumbing, I'm
going to take this plunger and shove it into your mouth sideways so you'll be able
to swallow a turkey WHOLE! Do I make myself clear?!"
"Ummmm, yeah?"
Just then, a loud "WEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" and a blur of pink hair streaked past
the open bathroom door. It was followed immediately by two "GET BACK HEREs" and one
*slip!* However, before Hotaru could completely fall, she latched onto the door
frame and steadied herself... at the expense of the door frame.
**CRASH!!**
Hotaru blushed. "Gomen nasai... You were thinking about replacing that
weren't you?"
If Rei's face wasn't red enough before, now it was. It looked like some
kind of volcano erupted. "OH GREAT PEOPLE! JUST TEAR APART MY ROOM WHILE YOU'RE
HERE!!! WHY DON'T YOU JUST HAVE A POOL PARTY IN HERE OR SOMETHING?!"
Backing off from her plumbing job, Haruka whispered to Hotaru, "I
think she's mad."
"Yup, no doubt about that one."
Just as Rei was about to launch into a plethroa of explictives, Ami
entered and broke up the commotion. "I'd really like some help, please? The
daimo- I mean Small Lady, is using the wet floor like a gigantic Slip n' Slide.
She naked, wet, lathered with soap, and VERY slippery!"
Hey, anything to get away from Rei. Haruka and Hotaru made a quick exit
to the Slip n' Sl- I mean, palace halls.
Meanwhile...
"At last! Some rest!" Setsun flopped down onto a bench, followed
closely by Michiru.
"Yeah, I know what you mean. Who would have thought a child would be
that troublesome?!"
"Remember Hotaru when she was young?"
"Mm hm. Our Hime-chan was such a sweet little child, such an angel.
She never did anything like this."
"No, never."
"If anything, she helped us with our li-"
Suddenly the calm was shattered by another "WEEEEEEEEEE!" and a zoom
of pink hair. A very pissed off Hotaru was not far behind, "GET YOUR PUNY
LITTLE *(&@#$ BACK *&^$*&ING HERE THIS ^&$%ING INSTANT OR I'M GOING TO &*^$#ING
TEAR YOU A &!@#ING NEW @$$HOLE!!!"
Michiru and Setsuna glanced at each other and asked simontaneously,
"Where did she learn THAT?!"
Minako and Makoto passed each other as they paced back and forth in the
teleportation room. Each second was more than likely bringing forth more
distruction on the palace than the Black Moon Family would one day. And with
each passing moment, Minako grew more worried. Finally a light began in three
of the portals, and figures started forming.
"YATEN-KUN!!! THANK KAMI-SAMA!! WE'RE SAVED!!" Minako squealed, hugging
Yaten around the throat to where, try as he might, there was NO point in trying
to breathe.
"What seems to be the problem?" Seiya asked, slightly annoyed with being
woke up(remember, they're in another galaxy) to take care of the senshi's
'immediate emergency that can't wait another second.'
"Umm... you'll see," Makoto said, dragging Taiki out the door, Yaten, Minako
and Seiya in tow.
Do you ever get that sinking feeling? I mean, when like you walk into
a room and you're LITERALLY sinking because the floor is flooded?
No? Well, I haven't, that's for sure. Safe to say, our new friends, the
Lights, never has such a sensation either.
"Uhhh, Mina-chan?" asked Yaten, "What's going on?"
Before the blonde could answer, the water rippled and shook. It was slow
and subtle at first, so slight that even Seiya thought it was his imagination.
But soon, it was unmistakable: something was coming.
"WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" Ahhh, the miracles of a Slip n' Slide.
"What the hell was that?!"
Eyes were nearly bulging out of the Starlights sockets; was that the
princess sliding down the palace halls as naked as the day she was born?! A
storm of senshi came falling by shortly afterwards.
Apparently, they were chasing the little girl.
Taiki elbowed his brother. "We're seeing things, right?"
Seiya only replied, "I hope so."
Anyway, Minako (from out of nowhere I might add) handed each of the Lights
a towel, a set of clothes, and a diaper. "Your mision -- which you have no choice
in accepting or refusing -- is to capture, dry, change, and feed Small Lady. May the
best Senshi win..."
Just as she was about to walk away, she added, "And it might interest you
gentlemen to know that the teleportation room has been locked, sealed, barricaded,
armed, fortified, and guarded. Makoto," the brunete gave a curt nod, "has seen
to those things the second you stepped into the palace. Don't think about escaping;
it's impossible."
Begrudingly, Yaten handed Seiya a thick wad of cash. The latter smirked
and said, "I told you Yaten. Maybe next time, you'll wisen up and not answer her call."
"Ready?"
"Ready!"
"Set?"
"...."
"Taiki!!!"
"Okay, okay... Set!"
"GO!!!"
In corner one, standing five feet two inches, we have Sailor Star
Healer - KKKOOOUUUU YATEN!!
Corner two, standing three feet two inches, weighing in at an incrediable
31 pounds -- Neo-Princess of the Moon and Earth -- CCCCCHHHHHIIIIBBBAAA Usagi!!!
*DING!* And they're off!
Towels forgotten, Yaten made a grab as he passed Small Lady. Notice the
word "passed". In a frail attempt at grabbing her, he knocked off his
well structured (or just plain lucky) balance and fell face forward, still
sailing down the marble hallway at about 30 kmph.
Whizing by a freaked out looking Rei, Yaten slammed into the wall
head first and went unconscience.
"One down, two to go," Rei mumbled, pulling Yaten through the water and into
the side room to save him from any other crashes that was more than likely to be
made.
*DING DING*
Now contestant number two, Kou Seiya, takes the ropes!
Carefully he threaded through the water, closing in on Chibi-Usa; who was sitting
in the middle of the hallway, giggling at Yaten's show.
Just in the nick of time, she looked up and moved to the right. The sudden
shock of the movement caused Seiya to loose his balance and fall to the ground
with a *splash!*
"Seiya funny!" Chibi-Usa giggled, pointing a chubby finger at Seiya's soaked
form on the floor.
Her naked bottom dissappeared down the hallway as she made her escape.
Chibi-Usa: 2
Starlights: 0
Taiki looked forward. Honestly, he had never imagined that he would loose
his balance so early in the game. Infact, at the exact moment Yaten took off.
But then again, he wasn't expecting Yaten to use him as a push board to gain
speed - inturn pushing him onto the wet floor. Trying again, he successfully managed
to get up without sliding.
And then, IT happened.
Chibi-Usa smashed right into the just-now-gaining-his-balance-senshi in an
act that would have made her mother proud. Both Sailor Star Maker and Princess of
the Moon and Earth went down in a giant *splash* that caused the waves of water
to hit against Rei's feet as she stood in the doorway of her bedroom (without a
door frame) watching.
"YES!!!!!!" Taiki screamed, bringing senshi to the hallway from every
angle. Holding up the small child like a prize, he announced, "I DONE IT!!!!!!"
"So..." said Minako.
"Yup..." said Haruka.
"Mmmmm..." said Rei.
"I guess," said Ami.
"Come on! It's not that hard! Just tell me what food you want me to make!"
Makoto pointed to the two piles, "It's either carrots or peas! Carrots or Peas!
How hard can that be?!"
"Well whatever you desicion is, make it quick. I think the Small Terror is about to
break free," Michiru added, sticking her head in the doorway.
"Carrots," Hotaru said, and Makoto smiled and began cooking. The rest of the group
filed out to watch the small girl. She was happily chewing on her bread.
"How did you manage to keep her seated?" Ami asked the Lights.
"The miricles of duck tape," Taiki said smiling. Upon closer inspection
the group noticed the Small Terror was indeed straped to the chair, and the
chair was strapped to the table.
"Lunch!" Makoto announced, placing a plate of food in front of her.
Smiling, Chibi-Usa tossed her bread at Makoto, hitting her on the head. Then
turning back to the plate of food, she began to eat. Slowly popping the chicken
nuggets into her mouth, she smiled happily.
Accidently dropping one, she went to reach it but the large amounts of
duck tape prevented much movement. Tears began to well up in her eyes. Sighing,
Makoto went to pick it up.
It was that little mistake that started it all.
When asked later, no one could exactly remember that weekend. They
remembered before and after, but that exact moment was never remembered. What happened
afterwards, however, was unforgettable.
Chibi-Usa eating happily.
Makoto picking up nugget.
Suddenly --
**SPLAT!!**
The plate of food fell onto Makoto's head, covering her with applesauce,
nuggets, ketchup, cabbage, and those darn carrots.
Makoto looked up, stunned, a blob of ketchup running down her face.
The rest of the group stared in shock.
Yaten walked slowly up to Makoto, trying not to smile. Reaching a hand up, he
grabbed a nugget off her shoulder and wipping some ketchup off her face, took
a bite. "Tastes good Mako-chan, but red really isn't your color." He ducked just
in time to avoid her fist.
"COME BACK HERE!!" she screamed, dashing after him. Everyone turned towards
the two racing around the room. Suddenly Yaten stopped, dead. Makoto smashed into
him.
"What?!"
"Look!" he pointed to the table. Makoto followed his lead. "What? I don't see
anything!"
"That's the problem, she's gone!"
Ignoring the child missing factor, Makoto and Yaten got into a fight. Food
fight to be exact. While the rest of the senshi slowly but surely crept out of the
room, the two fighters duked it out with catsup (or ketchup), mustard (or that
yellow stuff), nuggets (or chicken refuse), and those darned carrots. The end
result was a Yaten- who looked like a salad, and a Makoto- who looked like a
Ronald McDonald.
So just what WAS our queen and king up to while all this was going on,
unknown to them both?
"Usako..."
"Mmmmm..."
"USA!!!"
"Oh Mamo-chan!!"
"USAKO!!!"
"Ooooooo... OUCH!! Dammit Mamo-chan! Get it! Get it!"
"LET GO OF ME AND I WILL!"
"IT BIT ME!!!!!! WAAAAAAAA!!"
Endymion snatched the baby bird out of Serenity's hand and let it
go, then proceeded to nurse her bite mark. (what did you think they were
doing? Geesh, get your head out of the gutter!! ^_^)
"The skin didn't break Usa, you'll be fine." And instantly she
stopped crying and looked at her hand.
Taking a deep breath, Endymion wondered slightly if this was
worth un-interrupted sex. "Let's go back to the suite, okay?"
Nodding, Serenity started to walk, then stopped. "Mamo-chan?"
"Yes, Usako?"
"Do you have the map?"
Silence.
Meanwhile, back at the palace....
After calling a temporary truce, the warring parties absconded to the
showers, intent on cleaning themselves before anyone saw them.
Now, with Yaten being a singer and all in his day, it's understandable
that he'd have make-up with him. Afterall, make-up is what got all those
legendary bands like Hole and Marilyn Manson famous. It sort of became a ritual
for him; he used stage make-up to have himself look more... presentable...
espcially around Minako.
As the water cascaded from the showerhead, Yaten began singing some old
tunes fairly loudly. So loud, in fact, that he didn't hear the bathroom door
open, nor did he hear the slight pitter patter of feet on tile.
"Take me home tonight! I don't want to let you go to see the light!
Take me home tonight-"
While Eddie Money raged on in the man's voice, Chibi-Usa scaled the sink
and opened the mirror cabinet.
Inside was the usual toliettries like shaving cream, and such; the girl
knew it as Daddy's Stuff. Nothing interesting... except for a little black bag.
Curiously, she opened it, revealing everything from gel hair removers to
nose clippers to eye shadow. Well, of course our Small Lady hadn't been subjected
to the wonders of make-up yet. She thought the gel as syrup, the eye shadow as gravy,
the hair spray as aerosal canned cheese, and the *cringe* lipstick as... you
guessed it, one of those old, old Push Pops.
*CHOMP* *MUNCH* *GULP*
Meanwhile, Yaten was still singing, "I need some company! I'm gonna need you!
I need to hold you when the cold winds blow!! Take me home tonight! I don't
wanna let you-"
*CRUNCH*
"What the hell was that?"
Immediately, he thought that Minako had somehow snuck into the bathroom
to get romantic with him. Yeah right, wishful thinking.
"Mina-chan, honey, darling... Is that you?"
Not hearing an answer, our hero strode out of the shower... only to see
Chibi-Usa with her mouth covered in hair care products and make-up.
Everyone was still. Chibi-Usa looked like a girl caught in a pair of
headlights and Yaten looked... well, pretty stupid.
Suddenly, the little girl giggled and said, "Yaten-chan wrestling with
Mina-chan!!!"
Quiet perplexed at the statement, Yaten looked down and realized that
ummmmm, he had anticiapated Minako's arrival and well... was more than just a
little excited. The little girl's words made sense... in one of those bad ways.
But wrestling?! Where did she learn THAT one?!
But first things first. Our hero gracefully yanked the shower curtain
off the shower to cover himself. Now, if only he hadn't yanked so hard, the metal
beam holding up the curtain wouldn't have come off and knocked him out cold.
Yaten was found five minutes later by Minako. He was unconscious, wet and
shocked.
Sometime later... after Yaten managed clothes....
The rest of the senshi, including the now clean Makoto, peered in
the room.
"Ummm, why do you have make-up?" Minako asked as Ami brushed by, checking
the small girl over.
"It's stage make-up!" The others looked at him strangely. "It is! It was
left over from the whole Three Lights thing." Still the staring continued. "Stop
looking at me like that! It was!!" Picking up the slimy containers, he dropped them
in the trash. "This is all your fault!" he turned around to the small pink haired child.
Looking up at Yaten, her eyes widdened and she rushed towards the others.
Seiya picked her up, patting her back gently. "There, there - it's okay. No need
to be afraid of the strange man."
"Strange man..." she giggled, sucking her thumb. Laying her head on
Seiya's shoulder, one might have thought she would go to sleep...
"Awwwww she drooled on me!" Holding her out, he looked down at his
shirt. "And this was my best shirt too!"
But not for long...
You see, dear readers, you can't eat make-up and there be no reprocusions.
It's just not possible. And you most definitly can't eat make-up then be tossed
around. The result of such a combination? I think that's pretty clear.
"EWWWWWWWW!!!!!!" Seiya cried as suddenly Yaten's make-up decided
to make another apperance.
Smiling, Yaten took Chibi-Usa back, while Seiya went to clean himself up.
"Such a good girl! Yes you are!" Tossing her into the air, he laughed.
"Ummm, I don't think that's such a good idea..." Minako warned, but was
cut off by Makoto shoving her hair towel over her head and tying it.
"You have such a way with children," Makoto said, smiling smugly.
Can you guess what's coming?
Ready?
1...
2...
3...
"EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!" Yaten stopped tossing Chibi-Usa as the rest of
his make-up re-appeared.
Makoto smiled, "You know what Yaten. That really isn't your color. You
should consider a new line." Taking Chibi-Usa, she left the room giggling.
Yaten rushed into the bathroom, desprate to get cleaned up. Haruka
and Michiru left together, perhapes to 'wrestle' some more. Ami and Taiki decided
to find some research on child development. Hotaru, Rei and Setsuna decided it was
lunch time.
And Minako?
Well she began wandering down the hall, bumping into things. "Hey guys!"
she called. "Can you help me? I ow--" She ran into a doorway. "I can't see!" She
stumbled about. "MINNA!??!"
Makoto had put Chibi-Usa down for her nap. A few moments after the pink
haired child was asleep, so was Makoto.
Everything was quiet in the palace, too quiet... and we all know what
happens when things are too quiet.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!" a scream prierced through the comfortable silence
that had settled over the palace. Starting, Makoto sat up looking around.
"Is someone in trouble...?" she muttered looking around. Suddenly she
saw it.
"Awwww crap!" Makoto punched the wall then rushed out of the room.
Yup, Chibi-Usa was on the rampage again.
Following her insticts, or maybe it was the screams, Makoto rushed
down the hall. On the way she spotted Minako.
"Venus, we don't have time for these games," she said, grabbing her
friends arm and continueing down the hallway.
Finally the two reached the orgin of the screms. Taiki's room.
Pushing the door open, Makoto rushed inside expecting to find blood,
a dead courpse, army of youma...
Instead she saw...
... Nothing.
"What's all the screaming about!?!" she demanded, looking around.
"The brat ruined my books!" Taiki tossed one towards Makoto, but missed
and hit Minako in the head.
"Owww!" she squealed.
"Take the stupid towel off your head!" Makoto sighed, yanking it off.
Then picking up the book, she leafed through it. "So, it's just colorful
now. What's the big deal?"
"The big deal?! The big deal?!?! The big deal is that these books
have been in the family for generations! Their priceless!"
"Got that right..." Minako muttered, looking at the crayon drawings.
"I heard... wait! Where's the others?!" He glanced around. "There should
be two more..." Suddenly his gaze turned towards the bathroom. The child seemed
to have an afinty for water... rushing over he looked and sure enough, two books
were found floating in the toilet.
"Eww.. " Minako sneered as Taiki fished the books out.
"Just great! When I get my hands on her..."
"Taiki! She's just a child! She doesn't know any better!" Makoto looked
around, "Speaking of which. Where is she?"
"I dunno, haven't seen her - or anything - for a while," Minako
said.
"This is bad! It's getting late out," he looked towards the window
at the now darkening sky.
Just then, as if on cue, a beeping noise interrupted them.
"We have a major problem here!" Setsuna cried, "Someone has went
through the time gate!"
"But who could have gotten into..." Minako trailed off.
"CHIBI-USA!!!" the three cried.
And so dear readers, we begin a new journey.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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