Bishônen Warriors
Who's With Who Now?

"We're home-free!" Hearts declared in glee.

"Not quite," said a voice from behind them.

The Bishônen Warriors turned to see Tony the Tiger standing behind
them with a large axe in his hands. "Wow, it's Tony the Tiger!" Blue Moons
exclaimed.

"You five children have meddled enough with this world," Tony said,
"and it's time for you to die."

"Whoa, hold on, we're trying to free you!" Horseshoes shouted. "Trix
Rabbit is the enemy, not us!"

"Don't you get it? If you guys had never come here, then the Land of
Cereals wouldn't be in the midst of a civil war. Everything would be
perfectly fine, only under Trix Rabbit's insane rule."

"And you find this perfectly okay?" Clover Hats asked.

"He's been brainwashed by Trix Rabbit," Stars said.

Tony charged forward and swung the axe as hard as he could. Hearts
jumped aside, and Clover Hats met the blade with his hat pin. Stars joined
in with his Mace, and Blue Moons swung with this sword. However, Tony
managed to break the stalemate and knocked the three of them away. Hearts
notched an arrow in his bow and let it fly. Tony was struck in the back, but
was unfazed.

"Horseshoe Kick Shock!" Horseshoes shouted as he rushed forward and
delivered a powerful electric kick to the Tiger.

Tony was thrown back into a wall and knocked out. "Let's go!" Clover
Hats shouted. "We've gotta get outta here before they overwhelm us with
their numbers!"

Snap, Crackle and Pop jumped out of the darkness with their
electro-mallets in hand. "Allow us!" Pop said as he swung the mallet into
the wall.

The three brothers continued through the hole and started demolishing
a path to the outside wall of the palace. "Why are the helping us?" Blue
Moons asked. "I thought they were the enemy."

"Who knows," Hearts said. "Maybe they've had a change of faith."

"Or maybe they're just trying to lead us into a trap," Stars pointed
out.

"What have we got to lose?" Horseshoes asked.

"Uh, nothing really important aside from our lives," Clover Hats
said. "But, then again, it's either follow them or try to find our own way
out of this maze. They know the place a lot better than we do."

Hearts took off after Snap, Crackle and Pop, and was soon followed by
the other four Bishônen Warriors. Eventually, they made it to the outer wall
and escaped the palace. "Thanks a lot, guys," Hearts said. "We owe you
one."

"Damn straight," Crackle said, "and we're going to hold that to you."


Trix Rabbit fumed. With every passing day, he became more and more
frustrated with the Bishônen Warriors. "Send out a monster!" he shouted.
"And be sure to set the dial to 'Invincible!' Those children aren't going to
win this time."

However, there was no one else in the throne room to do it for him,
so he got up and turned on the machine himself. There was a cacophony of
bells, whistles and clanks, followed by a puff of smoke. The monster, which
resembled a baker, stood up and saluted King Trix Rabbit. "Muffin Man, at
your service!" it declared.

"Kill the Bishônen Warriors at all costs," he said. "I don't care if
you have to blow up my palace in the process, just do it!"

"Of course, my Liege."

Muffin Man charged off humming a familiar tune. Trix Rabbit put a
hand to his forehead to keep the vein from constantly bulging. "I'll win
yet... Just you wait and see, foolish children. No one messes with Trix
Rabbit and lives to tell about it!
Mwa-hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!"

His laughter rang through the castle, and the sound of it made Pots
of Gold cringe as he regained consciousness. "Damn, that rabbit is one sick
individual," he muttered as he stood up.

"Well, what are we going to do about it?" Rainbows asked. "After
all, it's not like he's controlling us. We could just kill him and take
over."

"Yeah right," Red Balloons said, "like the three of us could stand up
to him. He's got some massive power. You saw what that bear did to us.
Just think of what the rabbit can do."

"I ask again, what are we going to do, then?"

"We join the Bishônen Warriors," Pots of Gold said.

"What?!" Red Balloons exclaimed. "But we're supposed to kill them!"

"No, that's what the rabbit wants us to do."

"I have to agree with Red Balloons on this one," Rainbows said.
"Even if we join them, they're not going to trust us. We've tried to kill
them three times already!"

"It doesn't matter. We're going to join them, and that's final."

"So, there you are," Muffin Man said as he came up behind the Evil
Bishônen Force. "Are you ready to go kill the Bishônen Warriors?"

The three bishônen looked at each other, then at the monster. "Yep,"
Red Balloons said, "we sure are."


When the Bishônen Warriors got back to the Fortress of Cereals, they found
Sugar Bear sitting in a chair, smoking an opium pipe. "Oh yeah," he sighed
as he blew out the smoke.

"He's getting high again..." Blue Moons said.

"I thought he was always high," Clover Hats said. "There are just
times when he's higher than usual."

"Makes sense," Horseshoes said.

Lucky appeared in the window just above them, and he looked down at
the Bishônen Warriors. "I hate to rain on your parade," he said, "but a
monster and the Evil Bishônen Force are headed this way."

"Dammit!" Stars shouted. "Just when we thought we'd won."

"Don't worry about it," Hearts said. "We took care of them at the
palace, and we can take care of them again on our own turf."

"Here's your chance to prove it," Lucky said as he pointed at the top
of the nearby hill, "because there they are."

Everyone turned and looked to see the four figures standing at the
top of the hill. "Well, we've got no choice, really," Clover Hats said.
"Cheerio! Let's go for it!"

"Do you know the muffin man who lives on Mulberry Lane?" shouted
Muffin Man from the top of the hill.

"Why do they always have some stupid theme?" Hearts asked as he and
the others dashed up the hill.

"Clover Lucky Deluge!" Clover Hats shouted.

Green flood waters rose up and dragged Muffin Man and the Evil
Bishônen Force down the hill toward the Bishônen Warriors. Hearts pulled out
his bow and fired. Muffin Man took the shot in the chest, but remained
unfazed by both attacks. He raised one arm and chucked a huge muffin at the
Bishônen Warriors. "Starlight Dust Buster!" Stars shouted.

The energy sparks were absorbed into the muffin, but they failed to
stop it. Luckily for it, the muffin's landing was softened by Horseshoes'
body. Rainbows looked to Pots of Gold. "Are we going to help them or not?"
he asked. "They're getting their asses whupped!"

Blue Moons went sailing through the air right past them, and Pots of
Gold just kept watching. "You're the one who wanted us to defect," Red
Balloons said. "So what do we do now?"

"We wait," Pots of Gold said. "Who knows, maybe they'll win."

"Gee, what a turn of events that would be," Rainbows said
sarcastically.

Hearts whirled around, and his bow shimmered out of existence. He
stop and thrust out his arms. "Heart and Soul Shatter!" he shouted.

The pink energy heart shot forward from between his hands and hit
Muffin Man in the face. It exploded, but his face returned to its normal
shape. "You can't defeat me!" Muffin Man shouted. "I'm invincible!"

"Clover Hat Pin!" Clover Hats shouted.

The beam of green light shot forward from the end of the hat pin and
right through Muffin Man's stomach. The hole in the monster's body healed up
soon afterward. Muffin Man hurled another muffin through the air, and it
crushed Clover Hats under its weight.

"Blue Moon Single Eclipse!"

The sky turned dark, and a blue beam of energy shot down at Muffin
Man. Of course, as every other attack before it, this attack had absolutely
no effect in stopping the monster. "How the hell are we supposed to win?"
Stars asked.

"And what the hell are those three doing?" Hearts asked as he
motioned to the three evil bishônen.

"Uh oh, they've noticed," Red Balloons said.

Pots of Gold pointed his hand forward. "Well," he started, "no need
for them to get suspicious. Golden Munificence Surprise!"

The golden beam of light shot forward and plowed into Hearts' chest,
driving him back to the bottom of the hill. Muffin Man turned and smiled at
Pots of Gold before taking on Stars, the last remaining Bishônen Warrior.
"Shooting Stars!" Stars shouted.

Hearts and Blue Moons disappeared, and Shooting Stars came into
existence once more. "Comet Crater Rupture!" he shouted.

"Does he think that'll work?" Rainbows asked.

"Just humor them," Pots of Gold said.

A huge rock dropped out of the sky and crushed Muffin Man beneath it.
Then the rock exploded, creating a huge crater, in which Muffin Man rested
at the bottom. He groaned and stood back up. "Prepare to die!" he shouted.

"It's time. Rainbows, use your power to heal the others."

"Rainbow Light Purification!" Rainbows shouted.

Rainbow light filled the field and revived the fallen warriors.
Shooting Stars reverted back to Stars, and Hearts and Blue Moons reappeared.
"Use the Lucky Charms blast!" Pots of Gold shouted. "It's the only way to
defeat an invincible enemy!"

The eight bishônen surrounded Muffin Man, and he looked at the Evil
Bishônen Force in shock. "Just what are you doing?" he exclaimed.

"We're defecting," Red Balloons said. "Get over it."

"Hearts!"

"Stars!"

"Horseshoes!"

"Clover Hats!"

"Blue Moons!"

"Pots of Gold!"

"And Rainbows!"

"And the Red Balloons!"

The bishônen thrust their hands forward at the monster. "We're
frosted Lucky Charms!" they cried in unison. "And we're magically
delicious!"

A huge beam of light shot up from the ground beneath Muffin Man's
feet, and he was incinerated as it soared high into the sky. When the beam
dissolved, the Bishônen Warriors eyed their supposed enemies with unease.
"Why'd you help us?" Clover Hats asked.

"Because you needed it," Pots of Gold said. "And because we want to
be on the winning side when this war is over."

"So you're joining us?" Hearts asked.

The three bishônen looked at each other, then back at the Bishônen
Warriors. "No," Rainbows said. "It's every man for himself now."

"However," Red Balloons said, "if you need help, we'll be there to
provide it for you. As long as Trix Rabbit reigns, we are neither friends
nor enemies. And once he falls, perhaps that can change."

"Until then," Pots of Gold said, "we side with no one. Perhaps we'll
see you during the final battle. And perhaps we'll never see each other
again."

The three rônin turned and walked on down the hills into the sunset.
"Yeah, perhaps..." Hearts said.


Trix Rabbit scowled when he received the news that his Evil Bishônen Force
had decided to become the Neutral Rônin Force. "Then let the final battle
begin right now," he said through gritted teeth. "I'll make sure that those
children pay. This time, everything will be different. No more playing
around. It's time to get serious."

He walked over to his Random Monster-of-the-Week Generator and
pressed the blue button. As madness gripped his mind, he started laughing
hysterically, and he pressed the button repeatedly. Snap, Crackle and Pop
watched from their secluded corner, and they scowled at the rabbit. "He's
definitely lost it this time," Crackle said.

"We should do something," Snap said.

"Hey, Trix Rabbit, why you go so loco?" Pop asked.

Snap and Crackle replied by smashing him over the head with their
mallets. "That's enough out of you!" they cried in unison.

When they looked back at Trix Rabbit, they saw the throne room
starting to slowly fill with Monsters-of-the-Week, and they could only
surmise one thing:

He was serious this time.

To be continued...