Summer, day 30

I'm not friendly, like Ann. Or a good cook, like Ellie. Or pretty and flowery, like Popuri. So why does he like me? Why does he never fail to bring me freshly picked flowers, regardless of my turning up my nose and saying a sarcastic remark to his efforts? Why did he remember that I loved tomatoes, and selected the ripest from his crop to give to me, even though I acted like I didn't even want it, although I really did? Or even tried to talk to me even when I told him not to? I'm so confused...all my life I've been neglected. Perhaps that's why I turned to alcohol, it never snubbed me, or called me a bitch, as so many others have. So why is he turning all his school boy affections on me? Why doesn't he shower a better candidate for his love like he has been me?
I wish he knew that I'm going to leave him. Even if he is sort of cute, I'm not giving up my dream for one measly crush. I'm a dancer, not a potential farmer's wife! Still...I'll be sad to leave him behind. I should leave him a note...tell him that I'm not worthy of his doting. That he should move on and marry Ann or Ellie, even though that thought makes me clench my fists. Maybe I shouldn't leave...maybe all I'm seeking is an escape from my parents, and he could be just that. I'm pretty sure the only reason he comes by the vineyard is to visit me.
If I weren't so flattered by his actions, I'd be fearing that he was stalking me. He seems to know exactly where I'll be each day, and if he can't sneak a visit during the daytime in between his chores, he comes to the bar at night. I have to admit that I'm a little attracted to him. He's so determined. I've been courted before, and each suitor has failed to melt the ice that I presume surrounds my heart. I'm so morbid...it's no wonder the only girls who talk to me are Popuri and Ann. I wish he'd give up, like the others did. It gives me a lump in my throat when I think of how I'm going to leave him soon. Maybe he'll come after me.
Goddess, I've been watching too many movies. He wouldn't come after me. No one would come after me. The minute I leave, life in Flowerbud Village will resume normally. Oh, sure, there'll be a few tears from my mother, and rantings from my father. And poor...Oh, I can't even think about it. Maybe I shouldn't leave.

Fall, day 3

I'm so embarrassed! I was sick with the flu, when he came into my room! I wanted to kill my mother for sending him up there! I was mess, with my rumpled hair, tired eyes, and sallow skin, and not even fully dressed! Fortunately for the latter, I was snuggled underneath my blanket. But...still. I tried my best to hide it, but I was secretly glad that he came to visit me. Maybe I shouldn't kill my mom...

Fall, day 17

It's amazing what just happened! I was showing him around our shed, and we got locked inside, just like I had many years ago with a little boy. He found his way out, just like the little boy so long ago had. Then he told me that HE was that boy. I don't know what to think now...Goddess...I'm so confused.

Fall, day 21.

I don't know what to say! I'm so excited, my hands are trembling! He proposed, and of course I said, "YES!" Perhaps I did sound too excited...ah well. Funny, but being a farmer's wife doesn't sound so bad...just as long as he's the farmer! And I can still dance, now I'll just dance for him. Maybe this is a mistake, but it could be the best mistake of my life.

Author's Note: I love Karen, she's the best Harvest Moon 64 character! But, I know that if I were in her position, I'd be really confused about whether or not to stay and marry the farmer or run away and be a dancer. Please r/r!