It was really cool, man
I once saw some penguins slide
I insulted them and hurt their pride.
Off a cliff they threw me, and I went into a dive.
But I did survive.

I was Tim Taylor.
And I once built a slide.
But it exploded and I cried.
All of a sudden, the thing just went and blew.
And when it fell on me they said that I got killed.
But I'ma kickin' still.

I was a heavy weighter.
I ate all things and drank kool aid.
and ham and cheese did collide.
But one day I ate an avacado
I collapsed and fell to my pillow.
To my death I gained a lot of pounds.
I gained a pound, and a pound, and a pound, and a pound, and a pound, and a pound...

I was a martian
One who did not use tide
But then I met this man named Clide
All he had to do was throw a single can
And then he threw another one again.
And all that coke, it left a real bad stain.
And it will remain.
It will be back again, and again, and again, and again, and again, and again...