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Chapter 3: Searching for Answers
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Oz smiled at Willow before walking out into the hallway, but the instant the door closed behind him the smile faded and shoulders sagged. To Buffy it looked as if he had aged ten years in ten seconds. He lifted his eyes to hers. "She wants to talk to you."
"Okay." Buffy put a hand on her friend's shoulder and tried to smile. "It's gonna be okay." Oz simply nodded, and watched Buffy pass through the door.
"How is she?" Xander asked with concern.
Oz shrugged. "Okay, I guess. The doctor started an IV with some drugs that should stop the contractions."
There was a pause, as none of the men could think of anything to say. In the end, it was Oz who broke the silence. "Giles, I need your help."
"Of course. Anything."
"Research," Oz said with a pained look. "Find any cases of werewolves having children, and what happened those children."
Giles was concerned. "Oz, you can't possibly think that you are to blame for this. These things ..."
"Happen. I know. These things just happen." Oz's normally calm tone was colored with anger. "But if there is any chance this is my fault, I need to know. Maybe then we can do something to stop it."
"Alright." Giles doubted there was anything he would find that could be of any help, but it was obvious that Oz needed him to look, to be certain.
"C'mon, Oz," Xander said softly. "Let's go find some coffee or something."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Hey Will," Buffy stuck her head through the door first, trying to smile. Willow looked so pale, so scared lying in that hospital bed. It reminded her of the last time she had visited Willow in the hospital, almost two whole years ago.
Willow smiled in return. "Buffy! Come in!"
As Buffy got closer to the bed, she couldn't help but look for signs of the pregnancy, anything she might have missed. Now that she knew what she was looking for she could almost make out the slight bulge in Willow's stomach, even underneath the blankets. Thinking back, she couldn't remember the last time she had seen Willow change in front of her, which would have given her secret away long ago. In a small dorm room like their's, it was quite difficult to avoid occasionally seeing one another somewhat semi-clothed.
"So ..." Buffy searched for the right words. "How are you?"
"Frightened. Terrified." Willow looked into her best friend's eyes. "Kinda ashamed."
"Ashamed?" Buffy took her seat next to Willow's side. "Of what?"
"That I didn't tell anybody. Especially you." A single tear slid down her cheek. "I just ... it was like, if I didn't talk about it, it wasn't real, you know? And then I kept thinking 'Oh, I'll tell everyone tomorrow' but there were always so many tomorrows, and it seemed so much easier to wait. And now here we are and ..."
Buffy reached over and took her best friend's hand, careful not to dislodge the IV needle inserted in the back. "You don't have anything to be ashamed of. It's a scary thing. I don't know how you dealt with this all by yourself." A thought struck her. "Does Tara know?"
Willow shook her head and more tears began to fall. "No. I couldn't ... couldn't tell her yet. And I don't want to tell her here if I don't have to. So I figure we'll wait and see if this works. If not ..."
"Don't say that! It's going to work."
"I don't know about that." Willow was crying uncontrollably now, and her words came between heaving sobs. "I mean, it's like I said. I pretended it wasn't happening. So ... so I kept on with my life the way it was. I kept doing magic. What if ... what if the spells affected the baby? What if I did something to hurt it while I was on patrol with you, or like last night when we went to rescue Oz? This could be all my fault!"
"Willow, you can't ..."
But Willow didn't even hear her. "I did some research on babies and stuff. Did you know that my baby is 9.2 inches long? He or she only weighs two pounds, but it's a person now. If this had happened earlier I think I could have dealt with it, 'cause ... 'cause it would just be cells, right? Or just a fetus? Well it's a baby now, really. It has fingers and toes and in a week or two it'll be able to suck it's thumb and, and if I did anything to hurt it I don't know what I'll do!"
There was nothing Buffy could say that would help, and she realized that. Instead she just moved to sit on the edge of her friend's bed, and held her while she cried.
Chapter 3: Searching for Answers
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Oz smiled at Willow before walking out into the hallway, but the instant the door closed behind him the smile faded and shoulders sagged. To Buffy it looked as if he had aged ten years in ten seconds. He lifted his eyes to hers. "She wants to talk to you."
"Okay." Buffy put a hand on her friend's shoulder and tried to smile. "It's gonna be okay." Oz simply nodded, and watched Buffy pass through the door.
"How is she?" Xander asked with concern.
Oz shrugged. "Okay, I guess. The doctor started an IV with some drugs that should stop the contractions."
There was a pause, as none of the men could think of anything to say. In the end, it was Oz who broke the silence. "Giles, I need your help."
"Of course. Anything."
"Research," Oz said with a pained look. "Find any cases of werewolves having children, and what happened those children."
Giles was concerned. "Oz, you can't possibly think that you are to blame for this. These things ..."
"Happen. I know. These things just happen." Oz's normally calm tone was colored with anger. "But if there is any chance this is my fault, I need to know. Maybe then we can do something to stop it."
"Alright." Giles doubted there was anything he would find that could be of any help, but it was obvious that Oz needed him to look, to be certain.
"C'mon, Oz," Xander said softly. "Let's go find some coffee or something."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"Hey Will," Buffy stuck her head through the door first, trying to smile. Willow looked so pale, so scared lying in that hospital bed. It reminded her of the last time she had visited Willow in the hospital, almost two whole years ago.
Willow smiled in return. "Buffy! Come in!"
As Buffy got closer to the bed, she couldn't help but look for signs of the pregnancy, anything she might have missed. Now that she knew what she was looking for she could almost make out the slight bulge in Willow's stomach, even underneath the blankets. Thinking back, she couldn't remember the last time she had seen Willow change in front of her, which would have given her secret away long ago. In a small dorm room like their's, it was quite difficult to avoid occasionally seeing one another somewhat semi-clothed.
"So ..." Buffy searched for the right words. "How are you?"
"Frightened. Terrified." Willow looked into her best friend's eyes. "Kinda ashamed."
"Ashamed?" Buffy took her seat next to Willow's side. "Of what?"
"That I didn't tell anybody. Especially you." A single tear slid down her cheek. "I just ... it was like, if I didn't talk about it, it wasn't real, you know? And then I kept thinking 'Oh, I'll tell everyone tomorrow' but there were always so many tomorrows, and it seemed so much easier to wait. And now here we are and ..."
Buffy reached over and took her best friend's hand, careful not to dislodge the IV needle inserted in the back. "You don't have anything to be ashamed of. It's a scary thing. I don't know how you dealt with this all by yourself." A thought struck her. "Does Tara know?"
Willow shook her head and more tears began to fall. "No. I couldn't ... couldn't tell her yet. And I don't want to tell her here if I don't have to. So I figure we'll wait and see if this works. If not ..."
"Don't say that! It's going to work."
"I don't know about that." Willow was crying uncontrollably now, and her words came between heaving sobs. "I mean, it's like I said. I pretended it wasn't happening. So ... so I kept on with my life the way it was. I kept doing magic. What if ... what if the spells affected the baby? What if I did something to hurt it while I was on patrol with you, or like last night when we went to rescue Oz? This could be all my fault!"
"Willow, you can't ..."
But Willow didn't even hear her. "I did some research on babies and stuff. Did you know that my baby is 9.2 inches long? He or she only weighs two pounds, but it's a person now. If this had happened earlier I think I could have dealt with it, 'cause ... 'cause it would just be cells, right? Or just a fetus? Well it's a baby now, really. It has fingers and toes and in a week or two it'll be able to suck it's thumb and, and if I did anything to hurt it I don't know what I'll do!"
There was nothing Buffy could say that would help, and she realized that. Instead she just moved to sit on the edge of her friend's bed, and held her while she cried.