AUTHOR: Goddess Isa
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com
SUMMARY: Buffy & Angel's journals
SPOILER: S1 up until ANGEL g
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just email me & lmk where it's going - I like seeing my name in print =)
FEEDBACK: Please, I'd hate to have to Slay for it. =P
RATING: TV-PG, sweet
DISCLAIMER: They belong to Joss, but if he knows what's good for him, he'll share.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: God help us all, I'm using another Britney song. I'm seeking professional help.
//You tell me you're in love with me
Like you can't take your pretty eyes
Away from me
It's not that I don't wanna stay
But every time you come too close
I move away
I wanna believe in everything that you say
'Cause it sounds sooo good
But if you really want me
Move slow
There's things about me you just have to know
Sometimes I run
Sometimes I hide
Sometimes I'm scared of you
But all I really want is to hold you tight
Treat you right
Be with you day and night
Baby, all I need is time\\
Angel's a vampire. I've known that for a few days now. Even so, I'm scared. Scared for him, scared for me, scared for my friends.
I'm terrified because I think I love Angel. I know I've only just met him and we've never had a date but I love him.
I need to go slow with him, that much is clear. I'm not sure either of us really know how to go slow, because I've never really had a decent boyfriend who didn't expect at least a hand job now and then, and when I look at Angel, I wonder if he's ever known love at all, though I know he's been with many girls.
I'm gonna have to tell him I'm a virgin though, eventually. When you're in a relationship with someone, these things come up.
Of course, one night alone with me in the dark and I wouldn't have to tell him - he'll know I've never really done anything with a guy.
I guess I just need some time to--
Sorry, the phone rang.
It was Angel. I didn't tell Mom who it was. I just said, "It was a boy from school."
//I don't wanna be so shy
Every time that I'm alone I wonder why
Hope that you will wait for me
And you'll see that
You're the only one for me
Just hang around and you'll see
There's nowhere I'd rather be
If you love me
Trust in me
The way I trust in you\\
I've tried harder than I've ever tried at anything in my life not to love her. I can't. I can't do it. I've loved her since I first saw her.
And I know everyone thinks it's cause she's pretty, but it's not. She's the most beautiful person outside, but inside....there aren't words.
She embraces the Slaying with a force I've never seen. She does her job, but doesn't let it hold her hostage. She never takes her frustrations out on humans and she would never intentionally hurt anyone with a soul. (I was careful not to say anyone who's breathing, because I don't think she wants to hurt me, even though she does know the truth.
She's amazing.
And she's mine.
At least, with any luck, maybe someday, when she's ready, she will be.