And now chapter three, to Cledus T. Judds 'Inflatable.' Hope ya like it. By
the way, READ AND REVIEW!!! READ AND REVIEW!!! READ AND REVIEW!!! Now do
the reading...
Heero stepped over to Gufei, who was busy blowing up his, er, 'girlfriend.' "Um... Gufei? What are you doing?" Gufei smiled up at Heero. "Well, what do you think I'm doing? I'm blowing up the perfect girl." Heero sighed hopelessly. "Crap. He's lost it." Gufei shook his head. "No, I haven't. You and Duo have each other, and Trowa and Quatre, I'm all alooooooone. But not anymore! Not with her." Duo gave Heero a look that clearly showed his willingness to call the nearest mental institute. "No, bad idea... How about we just pop her?" Trowel asked. Gufei looked up at the other four gundam pilots fearfully. "Yo-You can't pop her! I won't let you!" Quarter sat on the bed next to Gufei and reached to pull the partially inflated thing out of Gufeis arms. "NO! LEAVE HER ALONE!"
//She's so squeezable, pleaseable,
unbreakable, she's inflatable.//
"Okay! Um... Gufei, have you considered the fact that it might just be possible to have a relationship outside of the gundam pilots? And the toy section of Wal Mart..." Quarter asked, muttering the last part under his breath. Gufei's lower lip quivered slightly, and he said "But... I don't want anyone else. I just want her." Trowel hit Gufei on the head with a shovel he had gotten from the garage. "Okay, now what do we do?" He asked as he watched Gufei fall flat on his bed. "Um... Now we get rid of that and take all his money away." Duo suggested, but then he saw Heero glowering at him. "Or not..." "Duo, that would be stealing. That wouldn't be very nice. Besides that, you stole my plan..." Duo grinned. "Sorry. I didn't know it was yours. When it popped into my head, I didn't see a copyright. I guess I should have looked harder."
//She's an arm full of sex appeal
can't wait until I get her home.
She's incapable of being difficult,
down to earthable, biodegradable//
Heero suddenly grabbed his gun, and Duo jumped down to the ground and said "I didn't mean it! It was just a joke!" Heero aimed the gun at the window. "I thought you said you were going to leave, Reelina." Reelina shoved the window open and climbed inside. "Well, I just thought I might be able to help. Which would you rather, him having a plastic girlfriend, or me?" Heero didn't have to think long about that. "The plastic one's better looking." Reelina got angry. "Okay, fine. Well, I could get some other girl for him. I could probably even find a guy for him." Trowel said "Okay, do it. Please! I don't want to have to knock him out every time he takes her on a date or something..." The other three hesitated, but thought it over and agreed. "Okay, I'll try to find someone interested in him. I'll tell them where you live and they'll be here tomorrow morning. And I won't even make you go on another date with me before I do it, Heero." Reelina climbed out the window and Quarter closed it behind her. "She wasn't fat. What'd you do to her, Heero?" Heero tossed the bottle of super-fast acting weight loss pills. "Just slipped 6 of those into her food." Quarter read the label.
//Shania Twain ain't got a dadblame thang
on my teasable squeezable pleaseable, she's inflatable//
"She lost 1200 pounds?" He asked. "And she looked like that? Wow. I thought she'd have to lose a lot more than just 1200 pounds to at normal weight." Heero nodded and said "So did I. Well, now her only problems are that she's ugly and female. If she gets plastic surgery and suddenly turns into a guy, she might actually be able to get a date. We should probably get some sleep pretty soon..." Heero glanced at Duo meaningfully. "Uh... He's got a point, Quarter. It's pretty late, after all." Quarter checked his watch. "It's only 9 30, Trowel." Trowel blushed. "Um... Let's just go to bed." Heero and Duo went to their room, and Trowel and Quarter to theirs.
//Most folks think that I'm full of baloney,
I'm never lonely.
Never thought I could buy someone
not tameable, airbrainable, recycleable, no I ain't foolable//
The Next Morning.....
Heero woke with a start. There had been a knock at the door. He shot a look towards the braided boy next to him. "Good, he's still asleep. I know she said 'next morning,' but this is a bit early." Heero slid out from under the sheets and put some clothes on, smiling as he thought about the previous night. "I guess I should wake up Gufei." He walked over to Gufeis room and shook him until he woke up. "Someones at the door. And it's for you. And so WAKE UP!" Why did the knocking stop? Heero left Gufei to get dressed and went to the door. "Oh, you two are awake." He noted. "Yup. Where's Duo?" Trowel asked. "Well, I don't want to wake him up... It's pretty early, and... Well, we were up pretty late..." Trowel grinned. "So were we. Is Gufei awake?" Gufei entered the room. "Yup." Trowel stepped to the right to reveal Mallard Pieceocrap. "Ah, crap! What's he doing here?" Gufei yelled. "Um... Well... Gufei, we told Reelina about your... Situation... And she offered to help." Gufei stared at Quarter in shock and anger. "What situation? You're just jealous, 'cause all you have is that... That..." Gufei smiled dreamily and hugged Trowel. "That gorgeous man..." Quarter froze in shock and then, without thinking about it, slapped Gufei.
//Didn't need a downpayment on that pretty little plastic thing.
It made my momma cry when we ran off one night
and caught a vegas flight,
and I made her my wife.
My fixable, patchable, washable, yeah, inflatable.
(Dang, honey, you give a brand new definition to takin' a mans breath away.)
It makes me feel so proud that I'm her feller
I'd never sell her.
People get your mind out of the gutter//
"Ow! Hey, whadja do that fo..." Gufei suddenly realised he was hugging Trowel. He jumped backwards. "Um.. Okay, so, what? You had Reelina get a bunch of guys to come over here so I'd fall in love with one or something? Did you consider the fact that I might just be straight?" Quarter nodded his head. "That's why she also sent a bunch of girls." Gufei leered at the golden haired offender. "Why'd he call me an offender?" Quarter asked. "Because you offended me." Gufei replied. After Gufei rejected Mallard, a few Oz soldiers, Brady One, Ms. Boing, Ms. Ornight, Caffeine, and several other girls, Trace ShishKebab walked into the house. Gufei, who had been complaining and whining the whole time, suddenly became quiet. "Trace?" Trace nodded his head and said "Yes, I'm gay. Judging by the long line of both men and women out there, I thought you might be too, but of course I'm probably wrong and have just made a complete fool of myself." Gufeis jaw dropped. "You're gay? And you didn't tell me? Why the hell not?!?" Gufei ran to Trace, slipped his arms around him, and began to kiss him. "Awww... Love at first admition of homosexuality. Isn't it sweet?" Heero said, only partially sarcastic.
//She's blondheadable, redheadable,
brunettable, interchangeable.
I didn't need a downpayment on that pretty little plastic thing.
She's incapable of being difficult.//
About 10 minutes later, Gufei and Trace finally seperated their mouths (Only because Heero threatened to shoot them both if they didn't). Quarter had fallen when Gufei pushed by him to get to Trace, and the thud had caused Duo to wake up. 10 minutes afterwards, and he was still working on getting his hair just the way he liked it. Gufei led Trace to his room, and soon after there was some rather loud moaning. Duo finally came out of the bathroom, his hair neatly braided, wearing his usual clothes. "Um... Judging by what I'm hearing, I'd say Gufei and Trace got along fairly well..." Quarter laughed. "Yeah, you could say that." The telephone rang and Duo ran to pick it up. After a few minutes he came back with some news. "Well, guess what? Some guy who said he's Heeros uncle wants us to go to his farm. If we decide to go, we have to leave tomorrow. I've got the directions written down in this notepad." He tossed the notepad to Heero. Heero glanced at the directions quickly, and said "We're going." "Well, I'm glad Heero took so much time to carefully consider that, and of course to take into consideration everyone elses thoughts on the matter." Trowel remarked sarcastically. "But, hey, what the hell. It'll be kinda like a vacation. And we'll get to see if Heeros relatives are as weird as him."
//Down to earthable, biodegradable.
My pleasable, patchable, washable, biodegradable, airbrainable,
squeezable, washable, she's inflatable,
that Diamond Rio song had way to many syllables.//
To be continued...
And now it's time for the reviewing part. REVIEW IT, DAMMIT! Please? And I'll have the next part up pretty soon, hopefully. I'll let you in on a secret... In the next chapter, Heero milks a cow. Yep. Cool, huh? Read it!
Heero stepped over to Gufei, who was busy blowing up his, er, 'girlfriend.' "Um... Gufei? What are you doing?" Gufei smiled up at Heero. "Well, what do you think I'm doing? I'm blowing up the perfect girl." Heero sighed hopelessly. "Crap. He's lost it." Gufei shook his head. "No, I haven't. You and Duo have each other, and Trowa and Quatre, I'm all alooooooone. But not anymore! Not with her." Duo gave Heero a look that clearly showed his willingness to call the nearest mental institute. "No, bad idea... How about we just pop her?" Trowel asked. Gufei looked up at the other four gundam pilots fearfully. "Yo-You can't pop her! I won't let you!" Quarter sat on the bed next to Gufei and reached to pull the partially inflated thing out of Gufeis arms. "NO! LEAVE HER ALONE!"
//She's so squeezable, pleaseable,
unbreakable, she's inflatable.//
"Okay! Um... Gufei, have you considered the fact that it might just be possible to have a relationship outside of the gundam pilots? And the toy section of Wal Mart..." Quarter asked, muttering the last part under his breath. Gufei's lower lip quivered slightly, and he said "But... I don't want anyone else. I just want her." Trowel hit Gufei on the head with a shovel he had gotten from the garage. "Okay, now what do we do?" He asked as he watched Gufei fall flat on his bed. "Um... Now we get rid of that and take all his money away." Duo suggested, but then he saw Heero glowering at him. "Or not..." "Duo, that would be stealing. That wouldn't be very nice. Besides that, you stole my plan..." Duo grinned. "Sorry. I didn't know it was yours. When it popped into my head, I didn't see a copyright. I guess I should have looked harder."
//She's an arm full of sex appeal
can't wait until I get her home.
She's incapable of being difficult,
down to earthable, biodegradable//
Heero suddenly grabbed his gun, and Duo jumped down to the ground and said "I didn't mean it! It was just a joke!" Heero aimed the gun at the window. "I thought you said you were going to leave, Reelina." Reelina shoved the window open and climbed inside. "Well, I just thought I might be able to help. Which would you rather, him having a plastic girlfriend, or me?" Heero didn't have to think long about that. "The plastic one's better looking." Reelina got angry. "Okay, fine. Well, I could get some other girl for him. I could probably even find a guy for him." Trowel said "Okay, do it. Please! I don't want to have to knock him out every time he takes her on a date or something..." The other three hesitated, but thought it over and agreed. "Okay, I'll try to find someone interested in him. I'll tell them where you live and they'll be here tomorrow morning. And I won't even make you go on another date with me before I do it, Heero." Reelina climbed out the window and Quarter closed it behind her. "She wasn't fat. What'd you do to her, Heero?" Heero tossed the bottle of super-fast acting weight loss pills. "Just slipped 6 of those into her food." Quarter read the label.
//Shania Twain ain't got a dadblame thang
on my teasable squeezable pleaseable, she's inflatable//
"She lost 1200 pounds?" He asked. "And she looked like that? Wow. I thought she'd have to lose a lot more than just 1200 pounds to at normal weight." Heero nodded and said "So did I. Well, now her only problems are that she's ugly and female. If she gets plastic surgery and suddenly turns into a guy, she might actually be able to get a date. We should probably get some sleep pretty soon..." Heero glanced at Duo meaningfully. "Uh... He's got a point, Quarter. It's pretty late, after all." Quarter checked his watch. "It's only 9 30, Trowel." Trowel blushed. "Um... Let's just go to bed." Heero and Duo went to their room, and Trowel and Quarter to theirs.
//Most folks think that I'm full of baloney,
I'm never lonely.
Never thought I could buy someone
not tameable, airbrainable, recycleable, no I ain't foolable//
The Next Morning.....
Heero woke with a start. There had been a knock at the door. He shot a look towards the braided boy next to him. "Good, he's still asleep. I know she said 'next morning,' but this is a bit early." Heero slid out from under the sheets and put some clothes on, smiling as he thought about the previous night. "I guess I should wake up Gufei." He walked over to Gufeis room and shook him until he woke up. "Someones at the door. And it's for you. And so WAKE UP!" Why did the knocking stop? Heero left Gufei to get dressed and went to the door. "Oh, you two are awake." He noted. "Yup. Where's Duo?" Trowel asked. "Well, I don't want to wake him up... It's pretty early, and... Well, we were up pretty late..." Trowel grinned. "So were we. Is Gufei awake?" Gufei entered the room. "Yup." Trowel stepped to the right to reveal Mallard Pieceocrap. "Ah, crap! What's he doing here?" Gufei yelled. "Um... Well... Gufei, we told Reelina about your... Situation... And she offered to help." Gufei stared at Quarter in shock and anger. "What situation? You're just jealous, 'cause all you have is that... That..." Gufei smiled dreamily and hugged Trowel. "That gorgeous man..." Quarter froze in shock and then, without thinking about it, slapped Gufei.
//Didn't need a downpayment on that pretty little plastic thing.
It made my momma cry when we ran off one night
and caught a vegas flight,
and I made her my wife.
My fixable, patchable, washable, yeah, inflatable.
(Dang, honey, you give a brand new definition to takin' a mans breath away.)
It makes me feel so proud that I'm her feller
I'd never sell her.
People get your mind out of the gutter//
"Ow! Hey, whadja do that fo..." Gufei suddenly realised he was hugging Trowel. He jumped backwards. "Um.. Okay, so, what? You had Reelina get a bunch of guys to come over here so I'd fall in love with one or something? Did you consider the fact that I might just be straight?" Quarter nodded his head. "That's why she also sent a bunch of girls." Gufei leered at the golden haired offender. "Why'd he call me an offender?" Quarter asked. "Because you offended me." Gufei replied. After Gufei rejected Mallard, a few Oz soldiers, Brady One, Ms. Boing, Ms. Ornight, Caffeine, and several other girls, Trace ShishKebab walked into the house. Gufei, who had been complaining and whining the whole time, suddenly became quiet. "Trace?" Trace nodded his head and said "Yes, I'm gay. Judging by the long line of both men and women out there, I thought you might be too, but of course I'm probably wrong and have just made a complete fool of myself." Gufeis jaw dropped. "You're gay? And you didn't tell me? Why the hell not?!?" Gufei ran to Trace, slipped his arms around him, and began to kiss him. "Awww... Love at first admition of homosexuality. Isn't it sweet?" Heero said, only partially sarcastic.
//She's blondheadable, redheadable,
brunettable, interchangeable.
I didn't need a downpayment on that pretty little plastic thing.
She's incapable of being difficult.//
About 10 minutes later, Gufei and Trace finally seperated their mouths (Only because Heero threatened to shoot them both if they didn't). Quarter had fallen when Gufei pushed by him to get to Trace, and the thud had caused Duo to wake up. 10 minutes afterwards, and he was still working on getting his hair just the way he liked it. Gufei led Trace to his room, and soon after there was some rather loud moaning. Duo finally came out of the bathroom, his hair neatly braided, wearing his usual clothes. "Um... Judging by what I'm hearing, I'd say Gufei and Trace got along fairly well..." Quarter laughed. "Yeah, you could say that." The telephone rang and Duo ran to pick it up. After a few minutes he came back with some news. "Well, guess what? Some guy who said he's Heeros uncle wants us to go to his farm. If we decide to go, we have to leave tomorrow. I've got the directions written down in this notepad." He tossed the notepad to Heero. Heero glanced at the directions quickly, and said "We're going." "Well, I'm glad Heero took so much time to carefully consider that, and of course to take into consideration everyone elses thoughts on the matter." Trowel remarked sarcastically. "But, hey, what the hell. It'll be kinda like a vacation. And we'll get to see if Heeros relatives are as weird as him."
//Down to earthable, biodegradable.
My pleasable, patchable, washable, biodegradable, airbrainable,
squeezable, washable, she's inflatable,
that Diamond Rio song had way to many syllables.//
To be continued...
And now it's time for the reviewing part. REVIEW IT, DAMMIT! Please? And I'll have the next part up pretty soon, hopefully. I'll let you in on a secret... In the next chapter, Heero milks a cow. Yep. Cool, huh? Read it!