Thanks for the reviews, people! I looooooove getting good reviews. It makes
feel fuzzy and warm inside. By the way... Just 'cause I'm such a nice guy,
there just might be a guest star appearing some time soon. Um... If it
isn't too much to ask, I'd like lots more reviews. And, on that note,
here's the 7th chapter to Cledus T. Judds 'Motel Californie'...
"Hmmm.... This place doesn't look so great after all... Maybe we should just keep going." Duo said uncertainly. Just then there was a huge earthquake and the ground split open behind the building, making it impossible for the group to get by. "I don't care, I'm still not staying here." Then a tree fell out of nowhere and landed on the other side of the split in the ground, and it was lit on fire by a sudden bolt of lightning. "Damn it, I'm not going in there! I'll find a way across that split and I'll jump over the damn fire." Then a moat appeared in front of the split in the ground, full of water and sharks. "I'm still going over there." Then the clouds parted above them, and a huge hand appeared. The hand smacked Duo, and he fell to the ground. "You're going in there, whether you want to or not!" A thunderous, glorious voice proclaimed from the clouds. "Fine... Heero, looks like we're going in the damn place..." Duo said. Heero, for some odd reason, was several steps away from Duo. "Duo? Why were you talking to the sky like that? And why did you throw yourself onto the ground?" Duo stared at Heero in confusion. "What do you mean? I was talking to God." Heero nodded his head. "Oh, that's okay then. I thought you were talking to the voices in your head or something." "No, they only talk to me on Mondays and Wednesdays, for some reason." Heero backed away even further. "I'm just kidding!"
//(Yay! All right. Way to go!
Ooooh! Wooooh! Oh, yeahah!
Oh... Who is that?)
On a dark country highway
in my candy apple corvair. (I have no idea how to spell that. I am car-illiterate. Sue me.)
A strong smell of Cledus
need to change underwear.
Up ahead in the distance
I saw a sickenin' sight.//
Trowel went up to the door of the run down building and knocked. The sign above it said it was the Motel Californi. An old woman opened the door slowly. "Hello. Welcome to the Motel Californi. I hope..." She paused and cackled evilly. "... You enjoy your stay... Ehe... Ehehehe... AHAHAHAHAHA!!! Oh, sorry. Just thinking about a funny joke I heard earlier." She led the six boys into the lobby and made them all sign the register sheet. Oddly enough, there were no other guests. (Gee, wonder why that is.) "Um... I couldn't help but notice that there aren't any other people here." Quarter nervously pointed out, obviously wanting to know just why that was (As if it wasn't incredibly obvious, with all the dog crap everywhere). "Well, there's only one room here in the Motel Californie." She replied.
//My tank near empty and the lights is dim,
I reckon I'll stop for the night.
The sign out front said vacancy,
so I punched the bell.
Dog mess everywhere I stepped,
holy cow, oh my god, what a smell!//
"Uh... Okay... That could pose some problems." Duo said, and then blushed. "Heero and I had plans..." The woman stared at him mysteriously, her face half covered in shadows. "Could you stop that, already? You're freaking me out." The woman lit all the candles in the room, of which there were about 50 (Meaning the candles, not 50 rooms). "Okay, that was a bad idea... Now it's even worse." The woman glared at Duo. "Shut up, you braided fool! I'm not done being spooky and mysterious yet. Ahem... Sweet dreams, young mortals... I sincerely hope you awake form them. MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" Duo sighed and asked her "Are you done yet?" The old woman thought for a moment and then said "AHAHAHAHA! Okay, now I'm done. Good night!" The boys walked to the room she had indicated to, and saw that it was a huge mess. "Damn... This place is full of junk. And... There's only one bed. Uh... All who want to sleep on the floor, raise your hand." Heero said. No hands were in the air. "Right then... We're going to have to draw straws to see who sleeps in the bed. Unless everyone's willing to sleep in the same bed." The others all said they were willing to share the bed. "I would feel horrible if someone had to sleep on THAT floor because of me." Quarter admitted.
//Then she fired up a lantern
and she showed me her face.
False teeth in an old fruit jar!
Thought I heard them say
"welcome to the Motel Californie."
Such an ugly place
filled with toxic waste.//
Duo, Heero, Quarter, Trowel, Gufei, and Trace all climbed into the bed. "It's a bit crowded in here..." Gufei noted. "Let's see... One..." Duo yelped as Gufei pinched his ass. "Two..." Heero shouted out suddenly. "Three..." Quarter screamed. "Four..." Trowel slapped Gufei and said "Don't do that!" "Five, counting me. Six..." Trace whimpered slightly. "..... Seven? That's not right. Who the hell is in here?" Gufei asked. "I am known as... Judeca. But some call me.... Tim? Nah, screw it, I'm Judecca." "Uh... Okay then, Judecca, what the hell are you doing in our room?" Judecca's eyes glowed a firey red in the darkness of the room. "Well, that's very simple, you see... OH MY GOD!!! DUO!!!" Duo cowered in fear as the mysterious person called Judecca grabbed him and kissed him several times before noticing Quarter. "QUARTER!" "Trowel, help!" Quarter screamed fearfully, but before Trowel was able to protect him, Judecca went from Duo to Quarter. (Hey, come on, I just had to do it. I'm insane, the voices made me do it, okay? I'm not literally insane... But I act like it all the time... Crap, I talk too much.)
//Ain't but one room
at the Motel Californi.
Man this place is weird.
Gosh, I'm really skeered!//
Suddenly the door burst open, and another shadowy figure entered. "I... Am the author. Well, the second physical form of the author to have appeared in this chapter thus far. Er... Yeah... Anyways... I gotta steal you people away from me so I can have some fun, too." He said, before grabbing Duo and pulling him out of the room. "Holy shit, this place is weird! We have to get out of here!" Trowel screamed, but when he went to run he found himself staring Heero in the eyes. "Nobody leaves until we get Duo back, got it?" Heero growled at the retreating boy before him. "Uh... Sure. But... What about that Judecca person?" Heero glanced at Judecca. "I don't really know. But you should probably hurry up and save Quarter." (Hehehe. The story wouldn't be complete without the appearance of another odd figure, right?) Someone crashed through the window and landed in the middle of the room.
//The faucets weren't price fister, oh!
Scorched my contact lense!
The hot said cold and the cold said hot,
the wall heater burned the hair off my shins.//
"Damn it, not another one." Heero sighed. "Greetings, gundam pilots. And Trace ShishKebab. You can call me Vinsfeld, though the author's going to call me Vinsy because he's way too lazy to type the whole thing." Duo ran back into the room, screaming. "Wow, Heero, your boyfriend's a really good kisser..." The author said, as he stumbled into the room. "However, I'm afraid I can't be the good guy here. I'm always the bad guy. Just call me Judecca, I'll be your killer tonight." Judecca slid a knife out of his pocket and lunged for Gufei, since he was the closest to him. "I won't let you kill any of them!" Vinsy heroicly said, valiantly jumping in front of the knife. "Ha! Your knife cannot hurt me with my armor on!" Vinsy said confidently. "Really? Well, I usually can't do crap with knives. I'm an expert with guns." The shadow-enshrouded man lifted his arm, leveling his shotgun at Vinsy. "So nyah!" Unfortunately, he seemed to have forgotten about Judecca, who attacked him from behind with his discarded knife. When the knife was pulled away, there was a large gash in the authors back. "Dammit. My only chance for surival is to... Run like hell!" Then the author ran from the room, never to be seen again by the itsy bitsy spider he killed, however probably to be seen again by the gundam pilots.
//My room resembled a scrap yard
from a busted up t.v. set.
Rain was blowin' through my winders!
Now my bed's soakin' wet.
Then I called up room service, for a cheeseburger and fries.
That thing tasted like it'd been cooked back in 1969.//
"Hmmm... How the hell did I end up in this place? One minute I was sitting at home, minding my own business, then I bust through a window and I'm here." Vinsy wondered. A voice that seemed to come from nowhere echoed through the room, saying "I put you in here. This is my fic, and I can do whatever I want in it." Judecca ran around the room, yelling "Wheeeeeeeeee! This is fun! I got to make out with Duo and Quatre, and now I'm running around the room like a crazy person! Why am I running?" Judecca stopped and stood still, examining everyone in the room. "Hmmm.... This is the seventh chapter. Shouldn't you guys be to Duos grandfathers house by now?" Heero nodded his head. "If it wasn't for that damn squirrel, we'd have been there already." Then a squirrel climbed over the broken glass that was all that was left of the window. "It's that squirrel again! Get it!"
//You could hear my gas exploding from far away.
Woke up the clerk in the middle of the night, I swore I heard her say
"Have you enjoyed your stay at the Motel Californi?"
Oh, I ain't feelin' well, 'cause the room sure smells.
She said "We give it our best at the Motel Californi.
Surely you got some rest?"
Hell, I froze to death!//
"HEERO! No more trying to kill squirrels." Trowel yelled. Then Vinsy tossed the overgrown rat out the window, and it fell into the moat full of sharks. It shrieked an ear-splitting shriek, causing everyone in the room to cover their ears. "Why'd you have to do that?" Quarter asked, running to the window and looking at the spot the squirrel had gone down in, tears running down his face. "That poor little squirrel..." Then all the sharks in the moat flopped out onto the ground, dead as doornails. The squirrel leapt out of the water and latched onto Quarters face. "AAAAAAAAHHH! GET IT OFF! It's like in that movie, aliens!" Quarters voice got weaker with every word, and he soon passed out, presumably from terror. Vinsy grabbed the squirrel and forced a stick of dynamite down its throat, tossing it out the window afterwards. Judecca graciously offered to perform CPR on the fallen blond haired boy. "Nuh-uh. I'll do the CPR-ing around here." Trowel shouted quickly, running to Quarter.
//Stalactites from the ceiling, thermostat covered in ice.
Then I prayed, god I long for a Holiday Inn, or a Motel 6 would be nice.
Went to the old maids chambers for a clean change of sheets.
Somebody stabbed her with an old buck knife, she was cold dead, yeah, deceased!//
There was silence in the room as a scream rang throughout the building, a scream that was very suddenly cut short... Duo ran from the room to investigate, the others close behind. Duo opened a door down the hall and saw the old woman laying on her bed, a knife through her heart. Duo, being barefoot, slipped on the puddle of blood on the floor, and was caught by Heero. There was an eery glow coming from the knife, and as Judecca approached it to inspect it and see what made it glow, a huge hole opened up in the air above it. Judecca and Vinsy were then pulled into the hole, and it closed up, leaving the knife dull and glow-less.
//Last thing I bumember, I busted down my room door.
Feelin' nautious as my stomache churned from the scene I just seen before.
I took some X-Laxx from the night stand, (Never used it, can't spell it.)
and here on the toilet I sat.
As soon as I get my big but up from here,
I'm gonna call up Tom Bodett.// (Ooh, looky, another person I've never heard of...)
Then Trace noticed there was a glow coming from the window. He pulled aside the curtains, revealing the sun. "Holy crap, it's day already?!?" Duo asked, not believing that was possible. "Looks like it." Gufei agreed. "How the hell did time go by that fast?" The boys all turned around to go back to their room to get their stuff so they could leave, but much to their surprise... The Motel Californi was gone. It had just vanished. "That was weird... Our stuff is over there, let's get it and get the hell out of here!" Heero pointed out. "And... Look! Over there! It's our car, and the wheel's fixed, too!" Trowel rubbed his eyes, unable to figure out how that was possible. "I don't even want to know, anymore. Let's just go!" Quarter muttered. All of the others agreed to that and got into their car. Quarter was in the drivers seat when the car started up. "Everyone buckled up? All of you ready to go? Everyone comfortable?" Quarter asked cheerily. "Just go, already!" Duo said, looking troubled. "What's the matter with you, Duo?" Heero asked. "Look at that sign there." Duo said, pointing at a sign up ahead. "Motel Californie, 15 miles?!?" Quarter read, as confused as all the others. "Look over there, it's Jalopies used car lot. Somehow we all dreamed that, and judging by the way you all seem to know what I'm talking about, we had the exact same dream. Which is impossible, right?"
".... I don't care, let's just get out of here, okay?" Trace whined, and Quarter stepped on the gas pedal.
To be continued...
A bit odd, I must admit, even for me... But it worked, no? In the next chapter the gundam boys'll finally get to Duos grandfathers house. But... Well, if you listen to Cledus T' Judds songs, you just might know what happens when they get there. Anyways, This is where I sign off, so bye, people. Oh, and don't forget, I WANT REVIEWS! Heero? Tell them.
Heero: Okay, you. Either you write a review or you die. Got it? Now, start typing!
"Hmmm.... This place doesn't look so great after all... Maybe we should just keep going." Duo said uncertainly. Just then there was a huge earthquake and the ground split open behind the building, making it impossible for the group to get by. "I don't care, I'm still not staying here." Then a tree fell out of nowhere and landed on the other side of the split in the ground, and it was lit on fire by a sudden bolt of lightning. "Damn it, I'm not going in there! I'll find a way across that split and I'll jump over the damn fire." Then a moat appeared in front of the split in the ground, full of water and sharks. "I'm still going over there." Then the clouds parted above them, and a huge hand appeared. The hand smacked Duo, and he fell to the ground. "You're going in there, whether you want to or not!" A thunderous, glorious voice proclaimed from the clouds. "Fine... Heero, looks like we're going in the damn place..." Duo said. Heero, for some odd reason, was several steps away from Duo. "Duo? Why were you talking to the sky like that? And why did you throw yourself onto the ground?" Duo stared at Heero in confusion. "What do you mean? I was talking to God." Heero nodded his head. "Oh, that's okay then. I thought you were talking to the voices in your head or something." "No, they only talk to me on Mondays and Wednesdays, for some reason." Heero backed away even further. "I'm just kidding!"
//(Yay! All right. Way to go!
Ooooh! Wooooh! Oh, yeahah!
Oh... Who is that?)
On a dark country highway
in my candy apple corvair. (I have no idea how to spell that. I am car-illiterate. Sue me.)
A strong smell of Cledus
need to change underwear.
Up ahead in the distance
I saw a sickenin' sight.//
Trowel went up to the door of the run down building and knocked. The sign above it said it was the Motel Californi. An old woman opened the door slowly. "Hello. Welcome to the Motel Californi. I hope..." She paused and cackled evilly. "... You enjoy your stay... Ehe... Ehehehe... AHAHAHAHAHA!!! Oh, sorry. Just thinking about a funny joke I heard earlier." She led the six boys into the lobby and made them all sign the register sheet. Oddly enough, there were no other guests. (Gee, wonder why that is.) "Um... I couldn't help but notice that there aren't any other people here." Quarter nervously pointed out, obviously wanting to know just why that was (As if it wasn't incredibly obvious, with all the dog crap everywhere). "Well, there's only one room here in the Motel Californie." She replied.
//My tank near empty and the lights is dim,
I reckon I'll stop for the night.
The sign out front said vacancy,
so I punched the bell.
Dog mess everywhere I stepped,
holy cow, oh my god, what a smell!//
"Uh... Okay... That could pose some problems." Duo said, and then blushed. "Heero and I had plans..." The woman stared at him mysteriously, her face half covered in shadows. "Could you stop that, already? You're freaking me out." The woman lit all the candles in the room, of which there were about 50 (Meaning the candles, not 50 rooms). "Okay, that was a bad idea... Now it's even worse." The woman glared at Duo. "Shut up, you braided fool! I'm not done being spooky and mysterious yet. Ahem... Sweet dreams, young mortals... I sincerely hope you awake form them. MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" Duo sighed and asked her "Are you done yet?" The old woman thought for a moment and then said "AHAHAHAHA! Okay, now I'm done. Good night!" The boys walked to the room she had indicated to, and saw that it was a huge mess. "Damn... This place is full of junk. And... There's only one bed. Uh... All who want to sleep on the floor, raise your hand." Heero said. No hands were in the air. "Right then... We're going to have to draw straws to see who sleeps in the bed. Unless everyone's willing to sleep in the same bed." The others all said they were willing to share the bed. "I would feel horrible if someone had to sleep on THAT floor because of me." Quarter admitted.
//Then she fired up a lantern
and she showed me her face.
False teeth in an old fruit jar!
Thought I heard them say
"welcome to the Motel Californie."
Such an ugly place
filled with toxic waste.//
Duo, Heero, Quarter, Trowel, Gufei, and Trace all climbed into the bed. "It's a bit crowded in here..." Gufei noted. "Let's see... One..." Duo yelped as Gufei pinched his ass. "Two..." Heero shouted out suddenly. "Three..." Quarter screamed. "Four..." Trowel slapped Gufei and said "Don't do that!" "Five, counting me. Six..." Trace whimpered slightly. "..... Seven? That's not right. Who the hell is in here?" Gufei asked. "I am known as... Judeca. But some call me.... Tim? Nah, screw it, I'm Judecca." "Uh... Okay then, Judecca, what the hell are you doing in our room?" Judecca's eyes glowed a firey red in the darkness of the room. "Well, that's very simple, you see... OH MY GOD!!! DUO!!!" Duo cowered in fear as the mysterious person called Judecca grabbed him and kissed him several times before noticing Quarter. "QUARTER!" "Trowel, help!" Quarter screamed fearfully, but before Trowel was able to protect him, Judecca went from Duo to Quarter. (Hey, come on, I just had to do it. I'm insane, the voices made me do it, okay? I'm not literally insane... But I act like it all the time... Crap, I talk too much.)
//Ain't but one room
at the Motel Californi.
Man this place is weird.
Gosh, I'm really skeered!//
Suddenly the door burst open, and another shadowy figure entered. "I... Am the author. Well, the second physical form of the author to have appeared in this chapter thus far. Er... Yeah... Anyways... I gotta steal you people away from me so I can have some fun, too." He said, before grabbing Duo and pulling him out of the room. "Holy shit, this place is weird! We have to get out of here!" Trowel screamed, but when he went to run he found himself staring Heero in the eyes. "Nobody leaves until we get Duo back, got it?" Heero growled at the retreating boy before him. "Uh... Sure. But... What about that Judecca person?" Heero glanced at Judecca. "I don't really know. But you should probably hurry up and save Quarter." (Hehehe. The story wouldn't be complete without the appearance of another odd figure, right?) Someone crashed through the window and landed in the middle of the room.
//The faucets weren't price fister, oh!
Scorched my contact lense!
The hot said cold and the cold said hot,
the wall heater burned the hair off my shins.//
"Damn it, not another one." Heero sighed. "Greetings, gundam pilots. And Trace ShishKebab. You can call me Vinsfeld, though the author's going to call me Vinsy because he's way too lazy to type the whole thing." Duo ran back into the room, screaming. "Wow, Heero, your boyfriend's a really good kisser..." The author said, as he stumbled into the room. "However, I'm afraid I can't be the good guy here. I'm always the bad guy. Just call me Judecca, I'll be your killer tonight." Judecca slid a knife out of his pocket and lunged for Gufei, since he was the closest to him. "I won't let you kill any of them!" Vinsy heroicly said, valiantly jumping in front of the knife. "Ha! Your knife cannot hurt me with my armor on!" Vinsy said confidently. "Really? Well, I usually can't do crap with knives. I'm an expert with guns." The shadow-enshrouded man lifted his arm, leveling his shotgun at Vinsy. "So nyah!" Unfortunately, he seemed to have forgotten about Judecca, who attacked him from behind with his discarded knife. When the knife was pulled away, there was a large gash in the authors back. "Dammit. My only chance for surival is to... Run like hell!" Then the author ran from the room, never to be seen again by the itsy bitsy spider he killed, however probably to be seen again by the gundam pilots.
//My room resembled a scrap yard
from a busted up t.v. set.
Rain was blowin' through my winders!
Now my bed's soakin' wet.
Then I called up room service, for a cheeseburger and fries.
That thing tasted like it'd been cooked back in 1969.//
"Hmmm... How the hell did I end up in this place? One minute I was sitting at home, minding my own business, then I bust through a window and I'm here." Vinsy wondered. A voice that seemed to come from nowhere echoed through the room, saying "I put you in here. This is my fic, and I can do whatever I want in it." Judecca ran around the room, yelling "Wheeeeeeeeee! This is fun! I got to make out with Duo and Quatre, and now I'm running around the room like a crazy person! Why am I running?" Judecca stopped and stood still, examining everyone in the room. "Hmmm.... This is the seventh chapter. Shouldn't you guys be to Duos grandfathers house by now?" Heero nodded his head. "If it wasn't for that damn squirrel, we'd have been there already." Then a squirrel climbed over the broken glass that was all that was left of the window. "It's that squirrel again! Get it!"
//You could hear my gas exploding from far away.
Woke up the clerk in the middle of the night, I swore I heard her say
"Have you enjoyed your stay at the Motel Californi?"
Oh, I ain't feelin' well, 'cause the room sure smells.
She said "We give it our best at the Motel Californi.
Surely you got some rest?"
Hell, I froze to death!//
"HEERO! No more trying to kill squirrels." Trowel yelled. Then Vinsy tossed the overgrown rat out the window, and it fell into the moat full of sharks. It shrieked an ear-splitting shriek, causing everyone in the room to cover their ears. "Why'd you have to do that?" Quarter asked, running to the window and looking at the spot the squirrel had gone down in, tears running down his face. "That poor little squirrel..." Then all the sharks in the moat flopped out onto the ground, dead as doornails. The squirrel leapt out of the water and latched onto Quarters face. "AAAAAAAAHHH! GET IT OFF! It's like in that movie, aliens!" Quarters voice got weaker with every word, and he soon passed out, presumably from terror. Vinsy grabbed the squirrel and forced a stick of dynamite down its throat, tossing it out the window afterwards. Judecca graciously offered to perform CPR on the fallen blond haired boy. "Nuh-uh. I'll do the CPR-ing around here." Trowel shouted quickly, running to Quarter.
//Stalactites from the ceiling, thermostat covered in ice.
Then I prayed, god I long for a Holiday Inn, or a Motel 6 would be nice.
Went to the old maids chambers for a clean change of sheets.
Somebody stabbed her with an old buck knife, she was cold dead, yeah, deceased!//
There was silence in the room as a scream rang throughout the building, a scream that was very suddenly cut short... Duo ran from the room to investigate, the others close behind. Duo opened a door down the hall and saw the old woman laying on her bed, a knife through her heart. Duo, being barefoot, slipped on the puddle of blood on the floor, and was caught by Heero. There was an eery glow coming from the knife, and as Judecca approached it to inspect it and see what made it glow, a huge hole opened up in the air above it. Judecca and Vinsy were then pulled into the hole, and it closed up, leaving the knife dull and glow-less.
//Last thing I bumember, I busted down my room door.
Feelin' nautious as my stomache churned from the scene I just seen before.
I took some X-Laxx from the night stand, (Never used it, can't spell it.)
and here on the toilet I sat.
As soon as I get my big but up from here,
I'm gonna call up Tom Bodett.// (Ooh, looky, another person I've never heard of...)
Then Trace noticed there was a glow coming from the window. He pulled aside the curtains, revealing the sun. "Holy crap, it's day already?!?" Duo asked, not believing that was possible. "Looks like it." Gufei agreed. "How the hell did time go by that fast?" The boys all turned around to go back to their room to get their stuff so they could leave, but much to their surprise... The Motel Californi was gone. It had just vanished. "That was weird... Our stuff is over there, let's get it and get the hell out of here!" Heero pointed out. "And... Look! Over there! It's our car, and the wheel's fixed, too!" Trowel rubbed his eyes, unable to figure out how that was possible. "I don't even want to know, anymore. Let's just go!" Quarter muttered. All of the others agreed to that and got into their car. Quarter was in the drivers seat when the car started up. "Everyone buckled up? All of you ready to go? Everyone comfortable?" Quarter asked cheerily. "Just go, already!" Duo said, looking troubled. "What's the matter with you, Duo?" Heero asked. "Look at that sign there." Duo said, pointing at a sign up ahead. "Motel Californie, 15 miles?!?" Quarter read, as confused as all the others. "Look over there, it's Jalopies used car lot. Somehow we all dreamed that, and judging by the way you all seem to know what I'm talking about, we had the exact same dream. Which is impossible, right?"
".... I don't care, let's just get out of here, okay?" Trace whined, and Quarter stepped on the gas pedal.
To be continued...
A bit odd, I must admit, even for me... But it worked, no? In the next chapter the gundam boys'll finally get to Duos grandfathers house. But... Well, if you listen to Cledus T' Judds songs, you just might know what happens when they get there. Anyways, This is where I sign off, so bye, people. Oh, and don't forget, I WANT REVIEWS! Heero? Tell them.
Heero: Okay, you. Either you write a review or you die. Got it? Now, start typing!