A/N: I suggest that you read this story somewhat slower then you would usually read a fic, it is rather info filled.
Perfection, Recognition, Control
Stars swirling, shrinking, sparkling. A cloud would softly slip into the scene, only to be ushered aside. Sweet blue lights hinted at their corners, sparking interest within the young eyes which watched so intently. Dancing in elegant circles, spinning into small orbs, creating time, shifting light.
Below the enchanting ceiling sat a great many children, dressed in robes of black, chatting amongst themselves. A single pair of ice blue eyes would flicker as a star danced, pulling him along, Unconsciously, his pale fingers would brush soft silver strands of hair from his face. The stars glittered, silently acknowledging the pleas of many, gently sweeping into new spirals. The blue eyes slid from star to star, examining each, in awe of such perfection they reflected.
"Drakie you've barely touched your food!" Shattering his concentration, the boy pulled his head up from its leaning position. He scowled at the girl tugging on his sleeve.
"I'm not hungry," he growled. Her brown eyes filled with tears. Ashamed, she averted her attention to her own dinner. With disgust, Draco pushed his plate away. Pulling a roll of bread from a nearby basket, he mumbled something about not being hungry. Standing, he walked from the Great Hall, tearing the roll in half. He eyed the halves, weighing them in his hands. His wandering feet led him to the lake, shimmering under the nighttime sky. Nodding to himself, he threw half of the roll into the lake. Taking the smaller half in both hands, he tore it apart again, repeating the process of weighing, tossing the larger half into the lake. Blackness enveloped the white bread, penetrating every pore. Tendrils of water pulled the roll down. Draco glared at the small piece of bread still in his hand, as though daring it to grow.
"Three calories... how the hell do those house-elves fit three calories into a single roll?" he questioned, his low voice dark with anger. Cautiously, Draco placed the small piece of bread in his mouth, forcing himself to swallow it. His stomach growled in fierce protest, his slender body breaking out in shudders.
Surpressing a cry of pain, Draco fell to his knees, arms wrapped tightly around his thin torso. He clenched his eyes closed, feeling the pain begin to subside.
Pain gone, he stood, taking one last glance at the stars, and walked back to his dormitory.
* * *
Laughter rang from all corners of the Great Hall, sounds of friends, sounds of enemies. Laughter resided within a young girl. Laughter haunted her. Flaming hair would slide across her cheeks, hiding the pained eyes. Chocolate brown eyes stung with uncried tears. People talked around her, but none to her. Whispers and screams, all around her. Quickly finishing her food, her slim fingers reached for the pudding, of which she gobbed large amounts onto her golden plate. The girl beside her squeaked with protest.
"Ginny, you mustn't eat so much! It's rather disgusting, don't you agree honey?" A young girl, dark hair in a plait, looked towards her red-head companion.
"Parvati's right, Gin. You'll turn into a little pig," the freckled boy replied, before turning back to his own food. Blushing deeply, Ginny placed her golden fork down upon the satin table cloth. Excusing herself, knowing no one heard, she hurried out of the Great Hall, tears streaming down her cheeks, leaving red trails upon her pale skin. Her feet followed the familiar path, leading her down corridors and stairs. Pausing before an old, battered door, Ginny brushed wetness from her face. Sliding her hand along the door knob, she entered, eyes darting from each stall, seeking any other people.
"Hello?" she said, voice soft. When no answer was made, Ginny entered the final stall, shaking with energy. Sweat formed on her brow as she locked the door, and knelt before the toilet. A familiar feeling burned in the back of her throat. Her mind ran through thoughts which she herself directed in hopes of ignoring what her body was doing. Shivering, she flushed the toilet repeatedly, wiping her mouth with the other hand. Sitting upon the ground, she placed her head between her knees, watching her tears fall to the ground. Slowly, rocking back and forth, she buried her hands in her hair. When tears fell no more she stood, tightening the sash around her waist, before unlocking the stall and leaving the bathroom.
* * *
Eyes. Hundreds of eyes tracked her motions, watching faults. Glares from some, pity from others, tears from some. Smiles were false, laughter dead, words meaningless, friends pointless. Gliding upon glass, the girl sat in her usual seat. Delicate, fragile, broken, cold. Whispers of such words swirled her thoughts.
Staring increased as each pair of eyes apologized, sympathized, pitied. More eyes. More words. More pretend. Almond skin set amongst dark tresses, brown eyes. She avoided the silent looks of teachers and friends. She watched as a silver-haired boy took shaken steps from the Great Hall, going through great pain to hide them. She watched as a red-haired girl stumbled from the room, tears in her eyes. She watched as people left the room, avoiding the eyes of those questioning, ignoring the glares of those who hated.
"Cho, I'm so sorry," a voice would cry.
"I understand what you're going through," a teacher would say.
"I'm always here," a friends would whisper. Her protests went unheard, her pleas forgotten, her tears all cried. Abruptly, she stood, softly padding from the room, a set destination in mind. Steering herself through hallways and corridor. Cho would ignore the eyes which watched, the pain that tore, the words that burned, out of control. Soft moonlight bathed the deck of the Astronomy Tower. Soft whispers couldn't be heard, glares couldn't be seen, just moonlight and stars.
In the corner, a torn box resided, though the moonlight didn't touch it. Crossing the platform in a few short strides, she opened the small box, fingers grasping a rough, wooden hilt. Pulling it from the box, a blade glistened under the pale light. A sweet smile flitted across her perfect face, casting an unusual spectacle. She placed the blade against her arm, watching as trails of crimson blood slid down her arm, slipping between her fingers. Again and again she cut, ignoring her minds' cry, focusing only on the pain. Sighing, she placed the blade back inside the box. Pulling a white hankerchief from a pocket, she dabbed the cuts, before placing it back inside her robes, and headed for her dorm.
* * *
A golden sun bathed the Great Hall, children in black ate quickly, while speaking to one another. A slim, blonde boy hesitantly ate a small pill, glancing at his plate.
"Ten calories... stupid vitamins... ten calories," he muttered, pushing the plate away.
"Hey Malfoy, quit your mumbling! Let's go to potions already," a thickboned boy said impatiently. Anger in him, Draco stood. A wave of weakness came over him, his vision blurred. His pale body shook.
Slowly, his vision cleared, the shakes slowed, his strength returned. Ignoring the fat boy's grumbles, Draco passed him, instead going to the lake, a small packet of treats from him mother in hand. He sneered at passing students, smirked at certain teachers. Reaching the lake, his face went blank. Ripples gently caressed the surface, yet the murky depths below lay hidden, secret from the world.
"For perfection," he whispered, tossing the sweets into the lake.
"For perfection."
* * *
A small red-haired girl glanced about the crowded room. The food before her lost it's appeal. Slim waists, thin faces, petite bodies all around. she glanced down at herself, blushing with embarrassment.
"100 pounds... and I'm only five and a half feet tall. I'm so fat," she whispered gently. Laughter rang out from the other side of her, yet Ginny knew the boy beside her hadn't heard what she said. He laughed with his friends, Ginny tried her best to ignore it. She quickly ate the second helpings of food she had, before walking from the Great Hall, to the broken bathroom. Nervousness increased in her, pulling her legs faster.
Halting before the battered door again, she paused to catch her breath before walking in.
"Is anyone here?" she called out, voice echoing off the walls. When only silence remained, she slipped into the final stall, locking the door in a swift motion. She knelt before the toilet, preparing to gag herself.
"For recognition, for a model's body," she whispered.
"For recognition."
* * *
"I'm so sorry!"
"Oh my God, I'm really sorry!"
"I've always got a shoulder!"
"I know how you feel!"
Cho scrambled from the Great Hall, though apologies seemed to follow. She ran to the Astronomy Tower, her control lost again. Fending off concerned looks, ignoring pitting eyes. She ran past ghosts, students, classrooms, and doors.
"Faster," she muttered. Black sleeves slid up her arm, revealing the scabs which criss-crossed her arms. Dashing up the stairs, she flew to the torn box, flinging the lid away. The knife sparkled, though patches of dried blood tarnished the blade.
She placed the cold metal against her tanned skin. Increasing pressure, warm blood slid along her arm.
"Control," she whispered.
"Finally I can control."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: Those who didn't read the fic slowly are probably going...
WHAT?
Here's a sum up:
Draco = anorexic
Ginny = bulimic
Cho = self mutilation.
You doubt the symptoms of anorexia or S.M, well then, you obviously don't know me or my friends. Please R/R! I never get any reviews!
Perfection, Recognition, Control
Stars swirling, shrinking, sparkling. A cloud would softly slip into the scene, only to be ushered aside. Sweet blue lights hinted at their corners, sparking interest within the young eyes which watched so intently. Dancing in elegant circles, spinning into small orbs, creating time, shifting light.
Below the enchanting ceiling sat a great many children, dressed in robes of black, chatting amongst themselves. A single pair of ice blue eyes would flicker as a star danced, pulling him along, Unconsciously, his pale fingers would brush soft silver strands of hair from his face. The stars glittered, silently acknowledging the pleas of many, gently sweeping into new spirals. The blue eyes slid from star to star, examining each, in awe of such perfection they reflected.
"Drakie you've barely touched your food!" Shattering his concentration, the boy pulled his head up from its leaning position. He scowled at the girl tugging on his sleeve.
"I'm not hungry," he growled. Her brown eyes filled with tears. Ashamed, she averted her attention to her own dinner. With disgust, Draco pushed his plate away. Pulling a roll of bread from a nearby basket, he mumbled something about not being hungry. Standing, he walked from the Great Hall, tearing the roll in half. He eyed the halves, weighing them in his hands. His wandering feet led him to the lake, shimmering under the nighttime sky. Nodding to himself, he threw half of the roll into the lake. Taking the smaller half in both hands, he tore it apart again, repeating the process of weighing, tossing the larger half into the lake. Blackness enveloped the white bread, penetrating every pore. Tendrils of water pulled the roll down. Draco glared at the small piece of bread still in his hand, as though daring it to grow.
"Three calories... how the hell do those house-elves fit three calories into a single roll?" he questioned, his low voice dark with anger. Cautiously, Draco placed the small piece of bread in his mouth, forcing himself to swallow it. His stomach growled in fierce protest, his slender body breaking out in shudders.
Surpressing a cry of pain, Draco fell to his knees, arms wrapped tightly around his thin torso. He clenched his eyes closed, feeling the pain begin to subside.
Pain gone, he stood, taking one last glance at the stars, and walked back to his dormitory.
* * *
Laughter rang from all corners of the Great Hall, sounds of friends, sounds of enemies. Laughter resided within a young girl. Laughter haunted her. Flaming hair would slide across her cheeks, hiding the pained eyes. Chocolate brown eyes stung with uncried tears. People talked around her, but none to her. Whispers and screams, all around her. Quickly finishing her food, her slim fingers reached for the pudding, of which she gobbed large amounts onto her golden plate. The girl beside her squeaked with protest.
"Ginny, you mustn't eat so much! It's rather disgusting, don't you agree honey?" A young girl, dark hair in a plait, looked towards her red-head companion.
"Parvati's right, Gin. You'll turn into a little pig," the freckled boy replied, before turning back to his own food. Blushing deeply, Ginny placed her golden fork down upon the satin table cloth. Excusing herself, knowing no one heard, she hurried out of the Great Hall, tears streaming down her cheeks, leaving red trails upon her pale skin. Her feet followed the familiar path, leading her down corridors and stairs. Pausing before an old, battered door, Ginny brushed wetness from her face. Sliding her hand along the door knob, she entered, eyes darting from each stall, seeking any other people.
"Hello?" she said, voice soft. When no answer was made, Ginny entered the final stall, shaking with energy. Sweat formed on her brow as she locked the door, and knelt before the toilet. A familiar feeling burned in the back of her throat. Her mind ran through thoughts which she herself directed in hopes of ignoring what her body was doing. Shivering, she flushed the toilet repeatedly, wiping her mouth with the other hand. Sitting upon the ground, she placed her head between her knees, watching her tears fall to the ground. Slowly, rocking back and forth, she buried her hands in her hair. When tears fell no more she stood, tightening the sash around her waist, before unlocking the stall and leaving the bathroom.
* * *
Eyes. Hundreds of eyes tracked her motions, watching faults. Glares from some, pity from others, tears from some. Smiles were false, laughter dead, words meaningless, friends pointless. Gliding upon glass, the girl sat in her usual seat. Delicate, fragile, broken, cold. Whispers of such words swirled her thoughts.
Staring increased as each pair of eyes apologized, sympathized, pitied. More eyes. More words. More pretend. Almond skin set amongst dark tresses, brown eyes. She avoided the silent looks of teachers and friends. She watched as a silver-haired boy took shaken steps from the Great Hall, going through great pain to hide them. She watched as a red-haired girl stumbled from the room, tears in her eyes. She watched as people left the room, avoiding the eyes of those questioning, ignoring the glares of those who hated.
"Cho, I'm so sorry," a voice would cry.
"I understand what you're going through," a teacher would say.
"I'm always here," a friends would whisper. Her protests went unheard, her pleas forgotten, her tears all cried. Abruptly, she stood, softly padding from the room, a set destination in mind. Steering herself through hallways and corridor. Cho would ignore the eyes which watched, the pain that tore, the words that burned, out of control. Soft moonlight bathed the deck of the Astronomy Tower. Soft whispers couldn't be heard, glares couldn't be seen, just moonlight and stars.
In the corner, a torn box resided, though the moonlight didn't touch it. Crossing the platform in a few short strides, she opened the small box, fingers grasping a rough, wooden hilt. Pulling it from the box, a blade glistened under the pale light. A sweet smile flitted across her perfect face, casting an unusual spectacle. She placed the blade against her arm, watching as trails of crimson blood slid down her arm, slipping between her fingers. Again and again she cut, ignoring her minds' cry, focusing only on the pain. Sighing, she placed the blade back inside the box. Pulling a white hankerchief from a pocket, she dabbed the cuts, before placing it back inside her robes, and headed for her dorm.
* * *
A golden sun bathed the Great Hall, children in black ate quickly, while speaking to one another. A slim, blonde boy hesitantly ate a small pill, glancing at his plate.
"Ten calories... stupid vitamins... ten calories," he muttered, pushing the plate away.
"Hey Malfoy, quit your mumbling! Let's go to potions already," a thickboned boy said impatiently. Anger in him, Draco stood. A wave of weakness came over him, his vision blurred. His pale body shook.
Slowly, his vision cleared, the shakes slowed, his strength returned. Ignoring the fat boy's grumbles, Draco passed him, instead going to the lake, a small packet of treats from him mother in hand. He sneered at passing students, smirked at certain teachers. Reaching the lake, his face went blank. Ripples gently caressed the surface, yet the murky depths below lay hidden, secret from the world.
"For perfection," he whispered, tossing the sweets into the lake.
"For perfection."
* * *
A small red-haired girl glanced about the crowded room. The food before her lost it's appeal. Slim waists, thin faces, petite bodies all around. she glanced down at herself, blushing with embarrassment.
"100 pounds... and I'm only five and a half feet tall. I'm so fat," she whispered gently. Laughter rang out from the other side of her, yet Ginny knew the boy beside her hadn't heard what she said. He laughed with his friends, Ginny tried her best to ignore it. She quickly ate the second helpings of food she had, before walking from the Great Hall, to the broken bathroom. Nervousness increased in her, pulling her legs faster.
Halting before the battered door again, she paused to catch her breath before walking in.
"Is anyone here?" she called out, voice echoing off the walls. When only silence remained, she slipped into the final stall, locking the door in a swift motion. She knelt before the toilet, preparing to gag herself.
"For recognition, for a model's body," she whispered.
"For recognition."
* * *
"I'm so sorry!"
"Oh my God, I'm really sorry!"
"I've always got a shoulder!"
"I know how you feel!"
Cho scrambled from the Great Hall, though apologies seemed to follow. She ran to the Astronomy Tower, her control lost again. Fending off concerned looks, ignoring pitting eyes. She ran past ghosts, students, classrooms, and doors.
"Faster," she muttered. Black sleeves slid up her arm, revealing the scabs which criss-crossed her arms. Dashing up the stairs, she flew to the torn box, flinging the lid away. The knife sparkled, though patches of dried blood tarnished the blade.
She placed the cold metal against her tanned skin. Increasing pressure, warm blood slid along her arm.
"Control," she whispered.
"Finally I can control."
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
A/N: Those who didn't read the fic slowly are probably going...
WHAT?
Here's a sum up:
Draco = anorexic
Ginny = bulimic
Cho = self mutilation.
You doubt the symptoms of anorexia or S.M, well then, you obviously don't know me or my friends. Please R/R! I never get any reviews!