***Possible Epilogue. EXTREME Slapstick Comedy, so if you liked the ending, STOP HERE!***
"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN, YOUR FRIGGIN' GAY?!" Chichi screamed,
throwing objects as fast as she could pull them out of her Pan Space.
Everything from rolling pins to crock pots to the Goddess herself came flying
at the two men, who ducked and dodged. A kitchen sink caught Vegeta right on
the widow's peak, knocking him back against the wall. Tiny blue birds flew
around his head, chirping.
"World domination," the birds sang. "Kill 'em all. World domination,
kill 'em all."
"Chichi, let me explain," Goku tried, ducking under a spare tire,
various guns and Washuu, who pulled out an experiment and walked out of the
kitchen. Outside, there was a muffled 'BOOM', but no one really noticed.
The daughter of the Ox King pulled a small steamroller out of her Pan
Space, and paused, looking at it oddly. "Oh, I was looking for that." She
shrugged and chucked it at the two cowering men, leaving a giant hole in the
wall.
Chichi went back to her screeching. "EXPLAIN?! EXPLAIN WHAT? YOU LIED
TO ME YOU MOTHER F*CKIN', @SS SUCKING, MONKEY LICKING SON OF A B*TCH!"
"Not from what I know of Kakkarot's mother," Vegeta said dazedly from
the wall. A giant mallet and a pot of boiling water came flying at him.
"SHUT UP!" Goku and Chichi both yelled.
"GRANDMA, will you please SHUT THE HELL UP?!" Pan screamed from another
room. "Trunks is FINALLY putting out for the first time in years, so GO THE
F*CK AWAY!" A knife embedded itself in the wall from the other room, it's
blade poking cleanly through the building to shine brightly in the kitchen.
Everyone was silent as the threat worked through their thick skulls.
"Hell hath no fury like a woman not gettin' some," Vegeta remarked
crudely, standing and brushing the dust bunnies off of himself. He had
forgotten how volatile Chichi's temper could be.
Chichi took a deep, calming breath. "How long has this been going on?"
she asked quietly, black eyes still sparkling with fury.
"Umm..." Goku looked at his toes and mumbled something.
"What was that? I can't HEAR you."
"About three centuries," he said still looking fixedly at his feet.
Chichi's eyebrows raised slightly in surprise. "That long?"
Goku nodded. "Uh-huh."
"Okay, Goku, I understand." She smiled sweetly, making the proud,
strong and invincible Son Goku hide behind his mate, trembling with fear.
Vegeta looked at Goku strangely, but didn't comment.
Chichi finished what she was saying. "I have a little announcement of
my own, and then we can talk about your relationship with Vegeta."
Goku looked over Vegeta's shoulder and nodded hesitantly.
"Alright, Goku, Vegeta, there's something I've been meaning to tell
you," Chichi said, smiling like the kindly old grandma that she'd never been.
"Out with it woman!" Vegeta yelled.
"I'm pregnant with Bulma's baby."
There were doubled thuds as Vegeta and Goku both simultaneously face
faulted, leaving face-shaped dints in the tile.
"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN, YOUR FRIGGIN' GAY?!" Chichi screamed,
throwing objects as fast as she could pull them out of her Pan Space.
Everything from rolling pins to crock pots to the Goddess herself came flying
at the two men, who ducked and dodged. A kitchen sink caught Vegeta right on
the widow's peak, knocking him back against the wall. Tiny blue birds flew
around his head, chirping.
"World domination," the birds sang. "Kill 'em all. World domination,
kill 'em all."
"Chichi, let me explain," Goku tried, ducking under a spare tire,
various guns and Washuu, who pulled out an experiment and walked out of the
kitchen. Outside, there was a muffled 'BOOM', but no one really noticed.
The daughter of the Ox King pulled a small steamroller out of her Pan
Space, and paused, looking at it oddly. "Oh, I was looking for that." She
shrugged and chucked it at the two cowering men, leaving a giant hole in the
wall.
Chichi went back to her screeching. "EXPLAIN?! EXPLAIN WHAT? YOU LIED
TO ME YOU MOTHER F*CKIN', @SS SUCKING, MONKEY LICKING SON OF A B*TCH!"
"Not from what I know of Kakkarot's mother," Vegeta said dazedly from
the wall. A giant mallet and a pot of boiling water came flying at him.
"SHUT UP!" Goku and Chichi both yelled.
"GRANDMA, will you please SHUT THE HELL UP?!" Pan screamed from another
room. "Trunks is FINALLY putting out for the first time in years, so GO THE
F*CK AWAY!" A knife embedded itself in the wall from the other room, it's
blade poking cleanly through the building to shine brightly in the kitchen.
Everyone was silent as the threat worked through their thick skulls.
"Hell hath no fury like a woman not gettin' some," Vegeta remarked
crudely, standing and brushing the dust bunnies off of himself. He had
forgotten how volatile Chichi's temper could be.
Chichi took a deep, calming breath. "How long has this been going on?"
she asked quietly, black eyes still sparkling with fury.
"Umm..." Goku looked at his toes and mumbled something.
"What was that? I can't HEAR you."
"About three centuries," he said still looking fixedly at his feet.
Chichi's eyebrows raised slightly in surprise. "That long?"
Goku nodded. "Uh-huh."
"Okay, Goku, I understand." She smiled sweetly, making the proud,
strong and invincible Son Goku hide behind his mate, trembling with fear.
Vegeta looked at Goku strangely, but didn't comment.
Chichi finished what she was saying. "I have a little announcement of
my own, and then we can talk about your relationship with Vegeta."
Goku looked over Vegeta's shoulder and nodded hesitantly.
"Alright, Goku, Vegeta, there's something I've been meaning to tell
you," Chichi said, smiling like the kindly old grandma that she'd never been.
"Out with it woman!" Vegeta yelled.
"I'm pregnant with Bulma's baby."
There were doubled thuds as Vegeta and Goku both simultaneously face
faulted, leaving face-shaped dints in the tile.