Jhondie dropped Alicia off at the hotel that Zack had been at before. She gave Alicia the key, and wished her good luck. Alicia watched her speed off, a little surprised at that kind of trust. She could easily walk away again. She still had no idea what she was going to say or do. Walking away seemed like the easiest thing to do. Hey, look, her feet were moving! Good feet, just keep going.
They were carrying her in the wrong direction. They took her into the hotel. Stupid feet. She knew exactly where she was going this time at least. And then she was at the door again, debating on if she should go in. She had the key this time. What was she going to say to him anyways? Maybe a note would be the best thing. Well, Zack wasn't opening the door this time. It was up to her completely. She felt sick.
Alicia took a deep breath, and put the keycard into the slot. It buzzed red. She ran it again. Still red. She hated these things. Why was it that she could disable high powered security systems within seconds, disable computer passwords in minutes, and disable the guards surrounding them just for fun, but she could never make a hotel key work the first time?
She put it in the other way, and the light flashed green. She opened the door. The room was pitch black. Jhondie had said Zack was sleeping. The mental image of her just crawling into bed with him came to mind. That wouldn't get any decisions made, but it would be much more pleasant than any talking. She smiled a little wondering how clothed he would be, and then slid into the room quietly.
Something grabbed her arm from behind the door. She was whipped around violently, her training taking over before her mind could even react. She grabbed the hand holding her, and dropped to the floor, pulling her assailant down, and bringing her knee up at the same time to throw him over her. He caught the move, and his free hand went to the floor first, keeping her from jamming a knee in his solar plexus, and keeping him in control of the flip.
Alicia was slammed hard against the floor as she lost control of the fall. Her body was not in the best shape for fighting. She was too tired, and too awkward. The blow stunned her for a second, and then her assailant jerked her up. She tried a leg sweep, but she just could not move fast enough. She was slammed against the wall, her feet off of the ground, and then the light switch was hit.
The look of absolute shock on Zack's face almost made up for the throbbing in her head. "Alicia!" he gasped, immediately letting go of her arms. She lost her balance a bit as she hit the ground, but he was immediately holding her up again, against him.
"Oh my God…I'm so sorry…I didn't know." He looked into her face. "Nobody was supposed to be here, and oh my God, are you all right?"
Well, this was not the greeting she'd been expecting. She blinked a couple of times to clear her head. "I'm okay," she muttered, trying to get back her sense of equilibrium. Being spun around while pregnant was definitely off of her list of things to do. And if he didn't stop jerking her to him, then pulling back to look at her, she really was going to be sick.
"I'm so sorry," he whispered again. "I heard someone at the door, and anyone else would have called first…and oh, God are really ok?"
It was just to stop him from talking. That was the only thing she had in mind. It seemed the more he talked, the more he kept moving, and she was really feeling sick. Her arms wrapped around his neck suddenly, and she pulled his face to hers. The moment their lips touched, whatever reason she had for kissing him, coming here, breathing in general, disappeared in the flash of electricity that contact sparked. She had thought they would talk for a while, and then she would have to leave, but if for any reason he decided never to stop kissing her that would be perfectly fine as well.
Since both of them required oxygen after about four minutes, they reluctantly parted. "What are you doing here?" he asked, touching her face tenderly. She could feel every bit of resolve melting under his touch.
"I ran into Jhondie and we talked," she explained. "And she made me see that I needed to talk to you before…" she broke off. Zack's eyes hardened, and he let go of her abruptly. At least she could stand on her own now.
"Before you leave," he said coldly.
"I'm not going home," she said quickly. He flinched when she so naturally referred to Manticore as home. "I don't want him raised X-7." She wasn't sure when she'd made this decision, but she knew it to be the right one.
"And you?" he said tonelessly.
"You know better than anyone why we have to keep separate. It's the same reason you kept the twelve separate. Operation security is compromised with each meeting." Did he realize that the coldness he was projecting was killing her? She steeled herself. She knew this wasn't going to be easy, but she'd been trained to do the most difficult things and succeed.
Zack turned away from her, acting like he was staring out the window. He didn't want her to see the tears. "Then go," he said brutally. "Just get out."
The pain was physical. If she could have found a voice, she would have screamed. She didn't want it to end like this. Absolute Zero, she thought. One last time, she needed that ability to feel nothing. "They'll be looking for a young woman with the child. I'm due in mid-July. Be in Seattle then. I'll send him to you, and it'll be up to you to keep him safe then." Neither of them could see the tears on the other's cheeks.
She turned quickly to leave. "You'll go back to Manticore then," Zack said, trying to keep his voice steady. Cole brought out Dana to hurt you, and you're going to take the bait."
She didn't turn around, but she did pause at the door. "Cole didn't mention Dana."
Zack glanced over his shoulder. She was still facing the door, her hand on the handle. "When he said for you to remember everything that he and Dana were, and to make the right decision. You trying to say you didn't hear that?" He sounded extremely doubtful.
She froze. He had said what? That must have been when she had to throw up. Zack got concerned when she leaned against the doorjamb. "Oh, God," she whispered.
"Alicia?" she heard Zack say, sounding concerned.
"You wouldn't understand," she said softly. "He knew that only I would. Nobody else in the world knew but us three. He knew I would understand him."
She wasn't sure why she explained. "Dana and Cole were lovers," she said in the same wondering tone. "They had been for several years. He loved her more than life itself. When she died, part of him did too. He wanted to remind me that he knew what it was like. He would have given up anything for her." Part of a conversation she'd had with him once came back to her.
"I asked him once why he was risking so much. They would have been in so much trouble if Dad found out. He said that when it was right, you don't let anything come between you." She finally looked over her shoulder at Zack. "Maybe that's what's wrong with us. "Everything comes between us because it has to come before us. You have responsibilities, and so do I." She nodded a little. They couldn't think of themselves first. Ever. That was the curse of leadership. She would have to make sure Manticore didn't fall so that the other sixers would be safe. Whatever it took, she would do, except turn in her son to them.
"Goodbye Zack," she whispered, and then walked out the door. He didn't even try to stop her. She knew that he knew she was right. It was better that two people got hurt than so many others. She wiped her eyes, and got back onto the elevator. He didn't come out of the room. Good. She would always love him, but that wasn't always enough.
There weren't that many people on the elevator, but it seemed to have to stop a hundred times before the lobby. She kept thinking of Cole and Dana, and everything that they had between them. Cole would have done anything for Dana. Literally. One time they got wind that Dana might be used for some experiments because she was the least productive X-6. Cole had been furious. He swore that before anything would happen to her, he'd take her so far away; they'd never find her.
He paced, and raged that there was no way he was going to let anyone ever hurt her. "If a few fivers can do it, so can I," he'd growled. Alicia had been shocked. There was something in this world worth leaving Manticore over? There was something worth dealing with the outside permanently? As the elevator reached the third floor, it suddenly hit her what Cole had done. What he had really said to her.
He'd hit her at all of her weak points. He'd pointed out how much she didn't want to be outside, and what she would lose if she left Manticore. He'd reminder her of everything that she had always said she wanted, and he pointed out how much she hated the outside. There was only one thing that made outside appealing to her, and he knew it. He knew how to push her. And he wanted to tell her something. If Zack was worth giving up everything for, facing being outside forever, that was something Cole understood. If he was worth that much to her, then Zack meant as much to her as Dana did to Cole.
If he meant that much, then Cole wouldn't come after her. He had been willing to give up everything for Dana. If he had run with her then, he knew Alicia wouldn't have really hunted him. Acted like it yes, but done it, no. He would give her the same courtesy.
The elevator doors slid open to the lobby. Alicia stepped out, not really seeing anything. She wasn't sure if she would kiss Cole or kill him if she ever saw him again. None of the other sixers stood a chance of finding her. It was almost funny really. Cole set her free to be with Zack, and Zack had told her to get out.
She wasn't prepared for someone to grab her upper arm. She went to jerk back from whoever it was, probably with a string of creative explicatives, but then she saw who it was, and the words died on her tongue. Zack. He was gasping for breath too hard to talk. From the corner of her eye she could see the doors to the stairs still swinging shut. So he was faster than a speeding elevator. Yippee.
"No," he gasped, shaking his head. "I'm not gasp letting you go gasp this time." He'd realized that the minute he's heard the elevator doors close. No matter what, he didn't want to live without her. Jhondie had once told him that he had to let wounds heal. There were scars to remind you, she said, but you have to let the wound heal to be happy in life. Now he understood. He'd run to the elevator, but punching the button half a dozen times didn't make it open, he'd hit the stairs. The last time he thought he'd moved that fast was heading towards the perimeter fence in Gillette.
For the first time, he didn't care who saw what. His only thought was to get to the lobby before Alicia could make it out. He had to make her stay. He'd jumped over the railing, and cleared about four flights of stairs at a shot. He'd skidded around bends, almost taking out a hotel maid at one point. He didn't even hear what she had to say, as he cleared the next set of stairs. She was furious. First some nut on roller blades goes flying through the lobby earlier that day, now this guy. And it wasn't even a full moon yet!
But he'd caught her. His ability to breathe and talk was returning as she glared at him. "I'm not letting you walk out on me ever again," he finally said.
"You told me to go," she spit out in a low voice. She made a half-hearted attempt to pull away from him. Not like she could if he didn't want to let go. He was stronger.
"Dammit woman, do you not know what an argument is?" From the sudden look on her face, he could see he hit the truth. She wasn't used to arguing with people. She didn't question Lydecker, and the sixers did as she said. He almost laughed. He'd gotten almost all of his practice arguing from Jhondie and Max.
"Stay," he said in a much softer tone, not even noticing the curious looks they were starting to get. He reached out and touched her face. "I don't want to lose you. I'll keep you safe no matter what." He could see her anger draining. "Please don't go."
"But you'll have to leave me," she said sadly. "You have to take care of them."
He was so frustrated because she was right. He would have to leave, but not for long. They were actually taking better care of themselves over the last year or so. Maybe a week here or a few days there, but he'd come back to her. "Marry me," he said firmly. Her eyes became huge with shock, and Zack knew this was the right thing. "Marry me," he said again, more of a question this time. "I may have to do a few days of traveling every now and then, but I'll always come home to my wife," he smiled almost boyishly, "and all of our kids."
He didn't know Cole wasn't going to look for her. He still wanted this anyways. Oh my God, she thought. It was pretty much the only thing in her head. In reality she didn't have to worry about the sixers. Cole could make the little mental readjustments required to the people deciding their future. He knew that too. Another reason why he could let her go.
"I…I…Uh…um…" she stuttered, not really able to talk quite yet.
"Just say yes," he said, still smiling at her. He pulled her close to him, their foreheads touching. "That's an order solider," he whispered.
She laughed, and then looked at him, their eyes meeting. This was crazy. It would never work. But they could make it work, and that's what counted. "Yes," she said softly. "I'd love to."
His eyes brightened. "Yes?"
"Yes!" she giggled. He swept her into his arms and kissed her passionately, both of them oblivious to the sudden burst of applause from the people around them.