Hi hello… this is my first fic about Tasuki and his undying
love for Miaka… yes, for me…well, this is also my fave… please do give reviews..
they are very much welcomed and appreciated…
Okay, okay… I own Fushigi Yuugi!!! Heheeh.. I was just
joking.. I don't want to be sue.. T_T
Here it is ^__~
~Setsunakutemo…Zutto~
~Even though it's
painful…always~
Tasuki sat there, always, under the endless
moonlight he always watches, and also at all times, again chewing a stalk of
wheat in his mouth looking in nowhere while his amber eyes watch the star in
the night, his fiery orange hair sways through, joining only the cold
wind. Nothing to look and nothing to
see, he just seems to sit there, feeling into his usual kept mood. Tasuki seem
to be very happy and the go-luck attitude, you tease him; he runs after you,
like wow, he's so joyful, but under that wide, big smile, and the jokes and
laughters, lies a very warm, passionate, sweet and silent heart.
Even
the setting sun that sinks like it was burning out is alone, unable to embrace
the earth or the deep seas.
"No
da… Gen chan, I know I'll find you in here, no da"
Chichiri
found him.
"No da, with the usual mark in your face. No
da?"
He teased.
Tasuki
just remains silent.
"Do shita no desu ka?"
Chichiri
sat beside him; still chomping some no-where-to-be-found stalk of wheat was in
his mouth.
"No da, you look very pale, byoki desu ka?"
The
monk continued asking and teasing Tasuki.
"Mochiron
iie"
He
replied.
"No da, doesn't look like that.. well, maybe
not but I'm very sure you're sick."
"Chichiri,
thanks, but I'm not really sick."
"Sick
in something else, or love sick.. are…"
"Stop…"
Tasuki
stood up, still looking at the stars above.
Whenever
I see your tears, I can't stand it, it makes me want to hold you close from
behind…
"No
da, you can't reach no da"
Chichiri
said with seriousness in his tone.
"Huh"
Tasuki
faced around.
"Gomen,
what do you mean?"
"They
are so beautiful, don't you think?"
"Chichiri..."
Tasuki questioned very anxiously.
"No
da, the stars"
He looks up the wide, black starry sky full
of dashing, bright stars that hung high above them.
"No
da, you just can't help but to fall…"
Tasuki
remained silent after Chichiri's words but the wonder was still in his face,
intended to keep and so he shut not saying a word and didn't ask anything
though he really wants to. Afraid he would have to leash something.
I
love you to the point it breaks me, no kinds of words are enough, because I
also have a love that I can never give voice to…
"No
da, don't be afraid"
His
friend said, still gazing at the marvelous stars that shine so heavenly.
"
No da, they are so beautiful, cant stop but to fall in love... Like to her…
don't hide the burning fire inside Tasuki"
Chichiri
explained.
"You
can ask and set it free, in that way, you can breath"
The
monk lessons him.
"Pardon,
I don't know what you're talking about."
"No
da, running away is bad, very bad, Genchan, I know it.. It's really obvuse."
"
I'm leaving."
"Stop
it now, drop it Tasuki."
"No
da, the shine in your eyes just like the stars you admire proves it. You're
words and actions doesn't lie"
He was about to go when he stop, he went back
near to this ever trusted and understanding monk, his friend.
Though
it's been sleeping, at the bottom of my heart, the red, painful passion takes
me by surprise.
"Umm.."
Tasuki
sat and ask him.
"No da, you can continue"
Chichiri
pondered, smiling.
"Eh, is.. is it.. is it, I mean is it really
obvuse?"
"No
da, hehe…"
Chichiri laughed.
"Now,
that's not fair, don't laugh.."
Tasuki
meaningly looked at his friend dancing and laughing.
"No
da, finally!"
Chichiri
rejoices.
"Cut
it, I'm not joking."
He
seriously uttered.
"No da, well, I can see it."
Chichiri
sat down with him.
"Do you think she sees it?"
Tasuki
asked.
The
monk remains silent.
Can't
become a man just by being born, true strength starts with love…
"That's a no, isn't it?"
Tasuki
continued.
"Hay…"
He
sighed.
"No
da, you're relief?"
"Yes
of course!"
Tasuki jumped out.
"I don't …"
He went on.
"Chichiri, she.. she's …"
"No
da, someone you always admire…"
Chichiri
cut his phrase.
"No
da, She's the most brightest and the most beautiful star you always admire, a
star."
His
friend continued.
"Yes, a star I… I can't reach…"
Tasuki
uttered very silently, his head still a prisoner of the star. Forever staring
at the star over him. He sheered very calm and very sorrowful. His voice tried
to hide the feelings and the emotions with what he said, but still the pain
overtook and felt. A kind of a tone Tasuki never used before.
If
there's a smile beyond your tears, I'll watch over you, like the dependable guy
I am…
Chichiri felt sympathy for his friend's love
and ache. How he wanted to help his friend from hurting under his first and
true love.
"No
da, there are still falling stars right?"
Chichiri
taught of something to prevent his friend in such agony.
"Che,
I want the way things are."
Tasuki seemingly spoke beyond his words.
"I'm happy for her"
He
continued.
"Tamahome
loves her so much and she too. They're a perfect couple."
"Noda, how bout you, my friend?"
Chichiri
asked.
"I'm
happy just seeing her happy…"
Tasuki
dowered.
"He
can make her happier than I do…" Agony went through his face and heart, pain
tearing him apart. Chichiri patted his shoulder.
"No
da… now I'm sure."
"Huh?"
Tasuki
asked.
"Sure of what?"
"No da, true love.. yes, it's indeed true
love."
Chichiri
answered.
"Hee.."
Tasuki
smiled. Up to look still in the star he love to gaze.
I
love you to the point it breaks me, no kind of words are enough. If it's a love
that can't be granted, then I'll wish only for your happiness…
"No, you really like stars ne?"
Tasuki
remained silent.
"No,
You keep on looking at that star since a while ago, or should I say since
before, de?"
Chichiri
teased again.
"No, hey talk you baka!"
Chichiri
teased again.
"No,
Fang boy! Water freak!"
Chichiri
added.
"What
you?! You're a piece of shet!"
Tasuki
walled his joke, now laughing, a much better sight to see than before, so much
different a while ago, he was so quite, unlike the hotheaded, shrimp-coaled guy
we know, he was so silent and very… very happy.. yes he is for he loves her so
much, more than himself and he's willing to protect her as long as he lives, be
it the only thing he has to live for… her. His love was bigger than life itself
that he can sacrifice and accept all the sorrows and just smile and be happy
everytime she's okay. And get and accept all the tears when he knows she's in
good hands. His heart is forever hers though he knows her heart is forever him.
Without end, for hers only though her one and only true love lies happily with
only one man, satisfied and contented as what he always wanted for her and even
though it's painful…. Always…
The
setting sun sinks again as it embraced its passion, it reaches its inward rest,
even though it's painful… always…
