AUTHOR: Goddess Isa
EMAIL: goddessisa@aol.com
SUMMARY: While Buffy is off killing Glory, Angel is given a chance to change the future, and he takes it even though it may cost him everything
SPOILER: MAJOR SPOILERS FOR THE END FO S5 BUFFY! Read at your own risk. Also contains minor ANGEL S2 spoilers.
DISTRIBUTION: Sure, just email me & lmk where it's going - I like seeing my name in print =) http://planetslaythis.homestead.com is my website.
FEEDBACK: Please, I'd hate to have to Slay for it. =P
RATING: TV-14
DISCLAIMER: Joss Whedon, David Greenwalt and UPN own the characters in this fic that you know. The characters that you don't, like Elisabeth for instance, are all mine. I love it when I can say that.
Chapter One - Flowers On The Grave
There was much to be done before battle.
Buffy knew this, but there were only a few hours left. She waited until everyone had gone to bed, until the cave was quiet, the only noise coming from the rhythmic breathing of her friends, to leave.
It wasn't a long walk to the cemetery, especially for someone who knew it as well as Buffy did. She went there almost every day, sometimes to patrol, sometimes to think.
But most of the time to visit. Joyce's headstone was large, with a beautiful picture of her and her precious girls, riding a merry-go-round when they first moved to Sunnydale. Buffy chose that photo because it was the one thing that, even without Dawn, truly happened.
It had been a warm, sunny day, and Buffy had been out all night on patrol with Giles. She'd snuck into the house just after nine a.m. and it was twenty after ten when Joyce bounced into her room.
"Rise and shine, little girl," Joyce teased.
"I'm not little," Buffy mumbled from under her covers.
"Oh, stop being such a spoilsport!" Joyce pulled the covers away and smiled at her. "Marilyn called. She rented the merry-go-round at the park for her little girl's birthday party today, but Isabel has fallen ill and won't be able to celebrate."
"I know that in some foreign land, this has to do with me."
"How did you know?"
"You always look at me like that when you're gonna ask me to do something you know I don't wanna do."
Joyce smiled. "My daughter the optimist."
"Mom, whatever it is, just tell me so I can get some sleep."
"All right, I give. I want you to come with me to the park. Marilyn asked me to ride the damned thing just once so she wouldn't feel like it was a complete waste of her money."
"Why would she ask you?"
"She knows I'm the only other person at the gallery with a child."
"Does she know that I'm sixteen?" Buffy asked, pulling the covers up to her chin.
"Come on, it'll be fun," Joyce opened all the blinds in Buffy's room, letting sunlight brighten it.
Wow, Buffy thought. In the daylight, it almost looks like a normal teenager lives in here.
"I might be persuaded to go shopping afterwards," Joyce bribed.
"You drive a hard bargain," Buffy threw the covers back and yawned before getting out of bed.
"You know," Joyce picked up Mr. Gordo and set him on her lap, "You're my favorite daughter."
"I'm your only daughter," Buffy mumbled before turning on the shower.
Reality blew cold wind in Buffy's face as she sat there, staring at the image of herself, her mother and Dawn.
"It's so unfair," she whispered. "Just like everything else in my life. I always hurt the people I care the most about."
She waited a minute before speaking again, trying to figure out what she should say.
"I can't stay long....I only came because I couldn't bear the idea of dying and not having been able to....I'm doing this for Dawn. Everything I've done since the day you died has been for her. I make her go to school and I watch her do her homework and I even took her to a Backstreet Boys concert to try and cheer her up.
"I'm gonna kill Glory for her, Mom. Even if it kills me, I'm gonna be sure that she doesn't kill Dawn. That she doesn't get near Dawn."
Buffy laid the roses she'd purchased on the grave and kissed her mother's picture. "I'm so scared, Mommy," she whispered. "I've tried so hard to be strong and be just like you, but I can't do it. You always told me how strong I was and how proud you were of me for being able to do what I do. But I'm not strong. You were the strong one.
"You sat at home every night knowing that I was going out there to Slay and I might not be coming home. And you were there when Dawn needed you, even when you were sick. You were our rock. And now we have nothing."
Buffy messily rubbed her eyes and sniffled. "I need to go. There's only a few hours before sunrise. I love you, Mom. Maybe I'll see you soon."
Buffy ran back to the cave, not wanting to take time to think any longer. She knew what she had to do--now she just had to make herself do it.
The first thing she did after arriving back at the cave was write Dawn a letter.
Using her journal, she scribbled page after page to her little sister about why she had to save her and how she hoped she got the chance to hug her when it was all over, but if she didn't, at least she would be safe.
"I'll be with Mom," Buffy wrote, "If I'm not with you. Think of that. And try not to hate me too much for it. I love you."
Buffy slid the journal under Dawn's pillow, then she knew beside her and kissed her forehead as she slept.
"There's so much I need to say to you," Buffy whispered. "Even if you were real, I couldn't love you any more than I already do. You're my baby sister. And even when I didn't have you, I always wanted you.
"I remember, from before, I used to beg Mom and Dad to give me a baby sister. And now I have one."
Buffy watched Dawn sleep for another minute, then she checked her watch and stood up.
"Good bye," she whispered. "I love you."
Without being detected by Giles or anyone else, Buffy stole out into the night, a bag of weapons and memorized spells she'd learned by candlelight over the past week her only defenses against Glorificus. She just hoped they were enough.
*****
As Buffy had expected and hoped, Glory's lair was dark at sunrise. Buffy took a deep breath, picked up her weapons bag and entered the building.
No one was around, not even a guard. Buffy was surprised--she'd been expecting a tussle right from the start. Instead, she found peacefulness inside the dark building.
It was eerie.
She didn't dare set her bag down for fear someone would charge, so Buffy kept it on her shoulder as she began searching the grounds for clues or more weapons. While looking though a bureau full of tacky makeup and fringed underwear, Buffy heard footsteps behind her. She reached into her bag, pulled out a dagger and spun around, ready to attack.
"Ben?!" she asked, half-shocked, half-relieved.
"Do you got a death wish or something?" he asked.
"What are you doing here?" Buffy questioned.
"You're not supposed to answer a question with a question," Ben smirked. "Didn't they teach you anything in English class?"
"Just to mind my manners," Buffy said lightly. "But I learned how."
Before Ben could react, Buffy stabbed the knife through his stomach. She repeated the motion until he fell limp. Buffy dropped the dagger and stood over him, staring.
"Sorry, but I just couldn't take any chances," she whispered. "At least now, I have one less man in my life to worry about."
"That doesn't matter," Glory said from the top of the stairs. "In a few minutes, you won't have any worries at all."
"What is it with you religious people?" Buffy asked, clutching another knife inside her bag. "You're full of all this talk about worries, and peace, and finding your place. It all sounds like a bunch of bullshit to me."
"Do you usually laugh before dying?" Glory asked. "I hear you've had experience with this before."
"It was nothing I couldn't handle," Buffy said. "And they were all stronger than you."
Before Glory could come up with another quick retort, Buffy threw the dagger at her. It bounced off her shoulder as though she it were made of rubber.
"Nice touch, isn't it?" Glory asked. "Didn't I tell you not to mess with me?"
"Give it up, Glory," Buffy threw the bag down, ready to fight fist to fist. Weapons were obviously going to be useless. "I'm not going down."
Glory laughed. "I love it when they talk tough."
"This isn't just talk," Buffy threatened. "This is war."
Buffy saw Glory raise her arm, but she never saw it coming. The last thing she remembered before blacking out was the spell she'd memorized disappearing from her brain.