FF-Rain1

This was an idea I'd been toying around with in my head for a while and now I finally have it written on paper (uh... typed on screen?). I based it loosely on how Max and Logan frequently have the same thoughts and say the same things in unison. I kind of didn't have an ending in mind so I didn't know how it'd turn out - and actually the whole story didn't really turn out as I had first envisioned it. It kind of doesn't have a plot and there's not a lot of action, just a bunch of wandering thoughts. Oh well. I don't quite know what to think of it except that it's kind of strange for my style (I just got done reading One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcìa Màrquez, so that might explain it), but maybe you do and you could tell me, yes (*wink wink*)? Any and all forms of criticism welcome. Enjoy.

Disclaimer: Dark Angel and it's characters belong to James Cameron, Charles Eglee (that's what I'm changing my last name to.. ) and FOX. No infringement is intended.

Rain

Rain. It sounds so sad on these roofs. So lonely. So...like the sound of machine guns. Damn. He washed us out good. Its not like I want to think about that hell hole, but everything seems to bring me back to Manticore. Before it was because I wanted to. I wanted to find the others. Then, thanks to Logan, I finally hooked up with Zack. I was so excited - finally I'd found them! The prospect delighted me - and I'm not one to even use the word delighted' - our own little gang of Super Humans. Hey, we could've started a band. But when Zack told me to leave Seattle and go to San Fran and that we'd split up there, I couldn't bring myself to do it. It wasn't so much the idea of splitting up - we'd been apart for so long anyway, but it was leaving this beat up city that irked me out. I'd built a new life, you know? I had friends here - Kendra, Original Cindy, Herbal, Sketch and the rest of the guys at Jam Pony. And of course there was Logan. I hadn't known it at the time but now that I think about it he's the reason I'm still here. I'd have probably left Seattle with Zack if it wasn't for him. If there was one thing Logan'd taught me it was that yeah, there are rotten things in this world opening your heart a little can make it that much better. I guess he'd brought out some hidden compassionate side of me that cares about total strangers and stopping those bad guys. And since that kiss, when I thought I'd never see him again, more feelings have been tugging at me - feelings that I've probably had all along but have just been locked up and kept in check. Feelings. Feelings are a sign of weakness.

Damn, there it goes again.

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Rain. Looking through the sheets of it coming down on my window makes the city look so bleary and sad. Not that it doesn't anyway. When will this world be right again? Or maybe this is the way it's really supposed to be. Hey, if it wasn't for the pulse Max wouldn't have broken in here to try and pawn that statue to pay her rent, or whatever it was. We would never have crossed paths. I'd probably be dead now if it wasn't for her. I remember when she first hooked up with Zack. Around that time Val came back to apologize' for the problems we had when we were together. If by apologize she meant sham me for some money, that is. Max and I were both more than bummed out after our encounters from our pasts that day, to say the least. We'd gone for a stroll in the park, in the rain, and I think it was then that I realized how much I felt for this girl. Sure, I'd loved before, but this was - this is - something totally new, like electricity. Never had that before. I guess it's because we're close. We know things about each other that no one else knows. Still there are secrets, but it's an understanding I think we both have - when secrets need to come out they will. I wish it wasn't a secret how I felt about her, though.

If only she felt the same way about me.

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Its him! Who else would page me at this time? Check that, who else would page me ever? With Logan it's always work work work though. I wish he'd lighten up, page me once in a while to ask me how I'm doing or just to say hi. Hey, even the old cat burglar needs to be a girl sometimes. Oh well, it's better than nothing. Means I'll get to see him - and a girl can never have too much of that.

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I don't know why I do it. Why can't I just stop working for a while and have fun? I want to ask her out on a real date' - I mean yeah, we always have dinner here but that's such a normal thing now. I want to treat her - take her for a night out on the town. Course, that's somewhat difficult considering that there isn't much town left for us to go to. That and I'm in this damned chair. The sooner I get out, the better. Oh well, seeing Max even just for work is better than nothing. Who could ever get enough of her?

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What would I do without my baby? Going fast. In the rain. Nothing more a girl could want. Praise to the guy who invented wheels. Huh, I bet Logan curses him. I wish he'd stop being so tense about his wheel chair. What does the man think? That just because he's can't walk he fails at life? Psh, I think he's the one that needs a lesson from Manticore. If he saw how much he does for the good of this place he'd realize how important he is. If he saw how much he does for me - how much he means to me - he'd realize it.

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Sometimes I think the only thing that girl has an ability to love is her bike. I have to smile when I see her with it though, she gets so glazed and talks about it like its her kid. Check that, she talks to it like its a kid. You never know with that glazed look though, when she gets it either she's talking about her bike or she's remembering something from Manticore. I can see part of her wants to forget all of it, but she can't. If only she could see what she means to everyone in her present - her friends, her job... me - then maybe she could let go. If she saw everything she does just for this one man, she'd be able to.

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Fogle Towers, home to Eyes Only and the richest man in Seattle. Funny how Eyes Only and richest man fit into the same sentence. Not so long ago I thought that if I were Logan, I'd have bailed and headed for Europe ages ago. Instead he's here spending money on stuff like helping the unfortunate with his Eyes Only, and spending it on me. That I still haven't figured out - if I were him I wouldn't trust a girl like me with thousands of dollars at a time. I'd probably just think she was gonna go spend it on LSD or something. And then there are those other things - like when he bought me that dress. Still can't believe it. He said it was because I was the most beautiful woman at the wedding. When he came to pick me up from Jam Pony that day, that's what I felt like. Seeing him in his tux, just grinning at me in my dress. I just wanted him to sweep me up and dance with him. Like in that dream that I had when I first transfused him - make him hold me and dance like that forever. It was weird, because when he recovered I felt like it was something we shared. Yeah my blood was running through him, but I felt that something else was too. Like my soul was running through his veins and his running through mine. I wish he'd felt it too. Felt that we were - we are - two people sharing the same soul.

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There she is. Who else besides Bling just walks in here without a care? And even then he knocks first. She asks me why I don't lock my doors and I tell her people like her would break in anyway so there isn't much point. Hey, she broke the lock on my heart and got in, didn't she? She's the most beautiful woman in the world. I knew that before, but I don't think I was conscious about it until Sam's wedding. When I saw her in that dress I just wanted to sweep her up and dance with her. Like in that dream I had when she first transfused me - just hold her and dance like that forever. It was strange, because when I recovered I felt like it was something we shared. Sure her blood was running through me, but I felt that something else was there too. Like her soul was running through my veins and mine was running through hers. I wish she'd felt it too. Felt that we were - we are - two people sharing the same soul.