Author: Elizabeth Wilde
Title: Words
Series: Unhealthy Obsessions #7
Distribution: Anyone who has my fic, anyone who asks me for it
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Bloody Roar characters or the song "Dumb" by Garbage, much as I wish I did. I'm not making any money, and there's really no point in suing.
'Ship: Shenlong/Shina
Classification: angst
Summary: Gado finds Shenlong's letter to Shina
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: BR1 & 2
Feedback: to vampire_slayer_d@2die4.com
*Maybe I could write a letter
to help me with my self-esteem
You should get to know me better
No-one's ever what they seem*
With a final sigh of disgust, Shina crumbled the letter up in one hand and threw it onto the floor. //What the hell kind of game is he playing? Being used for sex is one thing. This... this is just sick.//
She went into the makeshift weight room Gado had set up and headed for the punching bag. //This should help.// As she mercilessly pounding the bag, Shina could see the words Shenlong had written swimming in front of her.
~Shina,
This will sound strange. It feels strange to write. Forgive me if I say everything wrong. This is not exactly familiar territory for me. Perhaps not for you either.
I told you already that I want to know you. That is still true. I know no more about you than any standard intelligence report would tell me. I would suggest that we need to work on communication in our relationship, but I realize we do not have a relationship.
You made it clear that you are not interested in a relationship with me. I am afraid I cannot take you at your word in this case. I believe we could be good together out of bed as well as in. You are a fascinating woman.
You fear having something in common with me. Much as I wish I could somehow allay this fear, I might feel no differently in your place. My past, brief though it may be, is a bloody one. I regret none of it. That is not to say I might not make a different choice faced with the same situation now, but at the time I acted in the best way I knew.
I regret nothing
I hope that you have a similar lack of regret, particularly in regard to 'us', whatever category our trysts might fall under. Never before have I wanted anything the way I wanted you, the way I want you now. I will leave this letter beside your bed now. You will never know how strong the temptation to join you is. I want to be with you again.
I will come again in a few days to receive your reply, though I am unsure if I have clearly illustrated my question.
Yours,
Shenlong~
------------------------------------------
"Shina? Would you like..." Gado's words trailed off when he realized his daughter wasn't in her room. He walked into the room, frowning slightly at the lack of any personalization. There were no pictures, no posters, none of the personal touches that made a room belong to a person. //She treats it as if it's a barracks, not a room.//
Spotting a half-crumpled ball of paper, entirely out of place in the mostly sterile room, on the floor, he picked it up, smoothing the sheet as much as possible. Even as Gado reached to place the paper on Shina's dresser, the signature at the bottom caught his attention. //Shenlong? What the Hell...// Knuckles white, he gripped the paper, reading it through once, again. //Mon deiu...//
------------------------------------------
If it weren't for her well-honed reflexes, Shina would have pounded her fist into Gado's face when he appeared between her and the punching bag. "Shit! What do you think you're doing? I'm working out!" Without a word, Gado held up the letter. Shina's back stiffened. "You were going through my room?"
"Of course not. Not that I have any reason to explain, but I was going to see if you wanted to spar. I saw the letter on the floor and was putting it on your dresser when I saw the signature." Gado folded massive arms across an equally massive chest. "What is going on between you and Shenlong?"
"You sure you read that? Even the part where he talks about me not wanting anything to be happening?"
"You're avoiding the question," Gado said, clearly not impressed with Shina's attempt at evasion. "What does he mean by 'trysts'?"
Shina's eyes flashed. "He means exactly what you're thinking. I'm a grown woman."
"Which is all the more reason you should know better than to become involved with someone like him! You are an intelligent young woman, and-"
"And what? So I should put on a nice frilly dress and go have tea parties and wait for my fucking prince?" Shina stepped around Gado and slammed her fist into the punching bag hard enough to almost jar it free of the ceiling. She wheeled around to face her father again, and there were tears running down her cheeks. "Is that what you want me to do?"
Gado opened his mouth to speak, then closed it. //What is going on in her head?// He couldn't begin to guess what had caused the violent, emotional reaction. In their years together, Gado had witnessed Shina's passionate fury, had even seen her laughing until her sides hurt; never had he seen her cry. His own anger dissipating completely, fading into worry, Gado stepped toward Shina. "I want you to be happy."
"Yeah. Me too." She wiped her eyes with the back of her hands. "Just... don't ask, okay. I don't know, so... don't ask." After taking a final half-hearted swipe at the punching bag, Shina walked out of the room.
Title: Words
Series: Unhealthy Obsessions #7
Distribution: Anyone who has my fic, anyone who asks me for it
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Bloody Roar characters or the song "Dumb" by Garbage, much as I wish I did. I'm not making any money, and there's really no point in suing.
'Ship: Shenlong/Shina
Classification: angst
Summary: Gado finds Shenlong's letter to Shina
Rating: PG-13
Spoilers: BR1 & 2
Feedback: to vampire_slayer_d@2die4.com
*Maybe I could write a letter
to help me with my self-esteem
You should get to know me better
No-one's ever what they seem*
With a final sigh of disgust, Shina crumbled the letter up in one hand and threw it onto the floor. //What the hell kind of game is he playing? Being used for sex is one thing. This... this is just sick.//
She went into the makeshift weight room Gado had set up and headed for the punching bag. //This should help.// As she mercilessly pounding the bag, Shina could see the words Shenlong had written swimming in front of her.
~Shina,
This will sound strange. It feels strange to write. Forgive me if I say everything wrong. This is not exactly familiar territory for me. Perhaps not for you either.
I told you already that I want to know you. That is still true. I know no more about you than any standard intelligence report would tell me. I would suggest that we need to work on communication in our relationship, but I realize we do not have a relationship.
You made it clear that you are not interested in a relationship with me. I am afraid I cannot take you at your word in this case. I believe we could be good together out of bed as well as in. You are a fascinating woman.
You fear having something in common with me. Much as I wish I could somehow allay this fear, I might feel no differently in your place. My past, brief though it may be, is a bloody one. I regret none of it. That is not to say I might not make a different choice faced with the same situation now, but at the time I acted in the best way I knew.
I regret nothing
I hope that you have a similar lack of regret, particularly in regard to 'us', whatever category our trysts might fall under. Never before have I wanted anything the way I wanted you, the way I want you now. I will leave this letter beside your bed now. You will never know how strong the temptation to join you is. I want to be with you again.
I will come again in a few days to receive your reply, though I am unsure if I have clearly illustrated my question.
Yours,
Shenlong~
------------------------------------------
"Shina? Would you like..." Gado's words trailed off when he realized his daughter wasn't in her room. He walked into the room, frowning slightly at the lack of any personalization. There were no pictures, no posters, none of the personal touches that made a room belong to a person. //She treats it as if it's a barracks, not a room.//
Spotting a half-crumpled ball of paper, entirely out of place in the mostly sterile room, on the floor, he picked it up, smoothing the sheet as much as possible. Even as Gado reached to place the paper on Shina's dresser, the signature at the bottom caught his attention. //Shenlong? What the Hell...// Knuckles white, he gripped the paper, reading it through once, again. //Mon deiu...//
------------------------------------------
If it weren't for her well-honed reflexes, Shina would have pounded her fist into Gado's face when he appeared between her and the punching bag. "Shit! What do you think you're doing? I'm working out!" Without a word, Gado held up the letter. Shina's back stiffened. "You were going through my room?"
"Of course not. Not that I have any reason to explain, but I was going to see if you wanted to spar. I saw the letter on the floor and was putting it on your dresser when I saw the signature." Gado folded massive arms across an equally massive chest. "What is going on between you and Shenlong?"
"You sure you read that? Even the part where he talks about me not wanting anything to be happening?"
"You're avoiding the question," Gado said, clearly not impressed with Shina's attempt at evasion. "What does he mean by 'trysts'?"
Shina's eyes flashed. "He means exactly what you're thinking. I'm a grown woman."
"Which is all the more reason you should know better than to become involved with someone like him! You are an intelligent young woman, and-"
"And what? So I should put on a nice frilly dress and go have tea parties and wait for my fucking prince?" Shina stepped around Gado and slammed her fist into the punching bag hard enough to almost jar it free of the ceiling. She wheeled around to face her father again, and there were tears running down her cheeks. "Is that what you want me to do?"
Gado opened his mouth to speak, then closed it. //What is going on in her head?// He couldn't begin to guess what had caused the violent, emotional reaction. In their years together, Gado had witnessed Shina's passionate fury, had even seen her laughing until her sides hurt; never had he seen her cry. His own anger dissipating completely, fading into worry, Gado stepped toward Shina. "I want you to be happy."
"Yeah. Me too." She wiped her eyes with the back of her hands. "Just... don't ask, okay. I don't know, so... don't ask." After taking a final half-hearted swipe at the punching bag, Shina walked out of the room.