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Day One
11:00 AM
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Hawkmon frilled his feathers for the tenth time that hour. "Ugh...that egg was so confining. It's nice to be free again."
"Do you remember anything that happened?" asked Yolei.
Hawkmon shrugged. "After we disappeared, the last thing I remember was seeing a bright light, and waking up here in the room with everyone around me. As far as I'm concerned, nothing happened."
"Weird..." muttered TK. "Whatever Gennai did, it certainly wasn't a normal reconfiguration."
"It might as well be!" complained Hawkmon. "It hurt like the dickens!"
...It's time.
The kids in the room stopped their conversation and looked over at the young man dressed as the Digimon Emperor, who stood up. For the last hour or so, Ken had been the object of much tension in the room. The horror that was the Digimon Emperor was long gone as far as the others were concerned, but the sight of that costume was enough to bring back their old tension. For Ken it wasn't much better- it was a strong reminder of the monster he was once before. Something he didn't want to be reminded of.
Step up to the TV and hold up your digivice. Ken nodded and stepped up to the screen. Slowly he held up his black digivice, while the others watched.
"Good luck Ken," said TK, breaking the silence.
Ken looked over his shoulder and nodded to the boy. He looked down at Yolei, who locked eyes with him momentarily. The boy gave her a slight nod as well, which she seemed unable to answer, since she was so intent on keeping his eyes on hers. Finally, Ken turned around to the gate once again, and in a flash of bright white light, he was gone.
"...Ken."
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Another place...
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Ken regained his sight soon after the light disappeared. When he could see clearly, he looked at his surroundings...his familiar surroundings. He was standing on a sidewalk of a major street in a city of Japan. People were walking to and fro, going about their daily lives, apparently oblivious to his presence. Ken could feel the warm spring air and the small breeze that accompanied it. In a way, it was...soothing.
Where are we Ken?
"Gennai?"
This is all news to me as much as it is to you, my boy. I'm here to watch, but you're the one whose going to have to explain what's going on. Ken nodded and looked around once again, trying to figure out where he saw this place before. He took one look at the street signs that named the roads, and his eyes went wide as recognition dawned on him.
"...This is the street where Sam died."
I see...your brother was hit by a car, correct?
The old memories of Sam's accident came back to the surface. The old pain that accompanied it wore Ken's self-control thin. "...Yes."
So why do you think we're here?
"...I don't know."
A couple yards down the street, a small boy ran up to the edge of the street and yelled out Sam's name. Ken looked over instantly, and was amazed at what he saw. He saw a young boy, barely old enough to go to school, with purple hair and big, searching eyes. "Sam!!" he cried out again.
"That...that's me!" said Ken. "...But if I'm still looking for Sam...then that means he'll be-" Ken whipped around to the other side of the street, where he indeed saw the older Ichijouji brother walking down the street towards the young boy. Judging from the expression on Sam's face, he was still a little angry about what Ken had done earlier with the strange object that came out of Sam's computer. Of course, being an older brother, he couldn't stay mad at him forever, so slowly a smile formed on his lips as he walked across the street. The boy was apparently oblivious to the car racing down the street with a driver that was obviously not entirely sober.
The older Ken ran over to where Sam was walking, all the while shouting, "Sam, don't! There's a car coming!" Ken reached his older brother, but when he tried to push him out of the path of the car, he fell right through the boy. Ken fell to the ground, while the sound of screeching tires filled his ears. A scream filled the air...and a *thunk* could be heard as Sam and the car met. Ken turned around just in time to see Sam's loosely tied shoe fall to the ground before his younger self, while Sam's body fell several yards down the street...lifeless.
The older Ken stared at where Sam fell with a look of horror. The pain surged in his heart, and the boy cried out with all his heart and all his lungs to the rest of the world. "SAAAAAAM!"
"Sam..." whispered the younger Ken. The little boy was in complete shock. Never before had he seen anything so horrible as this. As the people walking through the city came to the scene to try and help, both Ken's simply stared at where Sam fell...and weeped.
...Sam's death. Possibly the most horrible experience in your life. Certainly, it was the first step on your path to darkness.
The older Ken gritted his teeth angrily as he tried to stop crying. "Why are you showing me this?! Why are you making me see this again?!"
I told you Ken...I'm just along for the ride. I didn't make these images...you are. Your mind is trying to tell you something. It's your job to figure out what.
"What?! Why would I show myself this?! I never wanted to see Sam's death again!" People continued to walk by, still not noticing the strangely-clad preteen kneeling on the ground before the car that hit his brother.
"...I...I didn't mean it..." said the younger Ichijouji, clear as day despite the fact that they were in the midst of a crowd of screaming people and sirens. Ken looked over at his younger self, who repeated the words softly. "...I didn't mean it Sam...don't disappear..."
What is this..."disappearing" stuff?
Ken felt the guilt in his heart, stronger than ever, as he recounted the events that led up to this tragedy. "...Earlier, I stole Sam's digivice from his room and used it on his computer. When he found out...he got mad and said he could never trust me again. I got mad too...and I wished that he would just disappear forever." Ken looked sadly over at the crowd surrounding Sam's body, where a team of medics were declaring the boy beyond help. "...I killed Sam."
So that's what this is all about. You think Sam's death is your fault, so you feel guilty.
"It is my fault," whispered Ken again. "I wished for it to happen...and it did."
Ken...you may have been a genius, but you weren't a magician. You can't kill somebody just by wishing it to happen. You had no control over him being hit by that car. It was beyond your control.
"But you just saw what happened!" said Ken, looking over at his younger self, who was in the care of some policemen at the moment. "I didn't do anything to help him! All I could do was watch as my brother was hit by that car. I didn't even shout a warning to him..."
You're only human...and at the time you were only child. Nobody can blame you for your inaction. Even if you did do something, it's likely Sam would still have died, and possibly you would have too. Fate intended for your brother to die...so Fate is the culprit, not you.
Ken remained kneeled on the ground, unable to get up from the weight of his emotions. "...I can't get the guilt out of my heart. When I found Wormmon again...I said that I could forget...but I can't do it on my own. Everything I've done so far is my fault. Sam...the Control Spires...Wormmon...Arukenimon's arrival...Blackwargreymon...they all happened because of me." Ken looked down at his gloved hands, and clenched them tightly as he screamed once again. He slammed his fists to the ground and resumed his crying, as the images around him slowly started to change. The concrete streets and steel buildings became total blackness. Ken looked around, and voices started to echo through the space around him.
[Arukenimon] "You served us well, my boy..."
"...Whose there?" Ken said as he looked around. "Gennai, are you still here?"
[Cody] "I don't trust him..."
"Cody?"
[Wormmon] "It's your fault that I died!!"
"Wormmon...?"
[Yolei] "He's a monster!"
[Kari] "The Digimon Emperor is pure evil!"
[TK] "Anything evil must be destroyed!"
"I'm sorry...please forgive me."
[Evil laughter, followed by Sam's voice] "You killed me, Ken..."
Ken felt pain deep in his heart. "...Sam?"
[Sam] "It's all your fault!! You made me die!!"
"I didn't mean it...I'm sorry..."
[Sam] "I'll never forgive you!!"
Suddenly, a bright flash of light appeared, and Ken was momentarily blinded by its intensity. He felt a wave of warmth overwash him, and the voices around him silenced in an instant. They were replaced with the calm, sweet sounds of a brook slowly drizzling by. Ken slowly regained his sight, and saw that he was in a beautiful, hilly scene like out of his dreams. The sky was filled with billowy white clouds, and the sun shined its warm rays down on the grassy earth where Ken was. Ken looked around at the windswept hills, and his eyes fell upon a figure in the distance. A feminine figure with long, flowing purple hair, sitting next to the brook at the base of the hill he was on, clothed in a flowing, silky violet dress. She was mythical in appearance, but Ken knew her immediately.
"...Yolei?" he whispered. The girl calmly looked up at where Ken was, and smiled up at him. She motioned for him to come over to where she was, which Ken curiously complied to. When he was at the base of the hill with her, he stood there, letting the wind flow through his cape as it passed over him.
"Yolei? What are you doing here?" Yolei indicated that Ken be silent by putting a finger to her lips. Ken, although confused, stayed quiet for the moment. Yolei motioned that Ken sit next to her. Ken felt that same nervousness that he always got when he was around Yolei, but he did his best to ignore it for the moment. Something about Yolei was different right now...something that made him feel less uncomfortable. Perhaps it was the feeling of peacefulness this place created in his heart...and the look of happiness on her face. Eventually, Ken sat down next to her, though still with enough space to keep him comfortable (about arms length). Yolei stared into the tiny stream before them, while Ken looked at her curiously and tried to figure out what was going on.
"...Yolei, what is this place?" Ken asked, finally breaking the forced silence.
Yolei looked over at him with a light smile on her face. "...This is your heart."
"My heart?"
Yolei nodded. "That part of you that laughs and smiles...and blows bubbles that fly forever. This is where your inner child is...the part of you that disappeared when all the bad things started happening." Yolei seemed saddened by this, and the wind seemed to become cooler at the moment her sad frown appeared. Ken started to grow uneasy.
"...My inner child," he repeated to himself. "That's right...I had forgotten about this place. I thought I had found it when I found Wormmon...but all I really found was an empty shell of what my heart used to be."
"This place...is beautiful," said Yolei as she resumed her watch of the stream. "...Where did you find such a beautiful place?"
Ken's mind drifted back to his early childhood...way back. It was difficult to remember the good times in his life...but something was making it a little easier this time around. Perhaps because he has done this sort of soul-searching before.
"...A long time ago, my family took a vacation to a place in the country. These hills and this brook were nearby...and we spent the whole day just playing around as a family." Ken looked at the stream as he remembered that day. "...It was the best day of my life. Not because of anything we did...but because we did it together...as a family. Out here my parents didn't care about Sam's accomplishments...and neither did Sam or I. All of us were just a family. It's the only time I can remember where I didn't feel like I was in Sam's shadow."
Yolei smiled and closed her eyes as she breathed in the clean country air. "I'm glad you brought me here Ken."
Ken looked confused. "...Brought you here?"
"Yes...you brought me here. I'm in your heart now...now, and I hope forever." Ken started to feel nervous again, but he resisted the urge to leave. He didn't want to leave her.
"Yolei...how can you be in my heart? I've never told you how I feel...I don't know how to say my feelings...not anymore."
Yolei moved over to Ken and kneeled in front of him. She rested her hands on her lap, and looked into Ken's sad eyes.
"Ken...you already have shown me how you feel. Words aren't needed for that sort of thing." She added with a smile, "It doesn't take words to say 'I love you'."
Ken smiled back, but he was still troubled inside. "But...that's not enough. How can I show you that I love you? I can't even laugh with you guys...I've forgotten how."
"That's not true," Yolei said sympathetically. "You didn't forget...you just can't reach it. Your heart is smothered by all your guilt."
Slowly, the boy genius started to understand what this was all about. He understood what his mind was trying to tell him...what this dream version of Yolei was trying to show him. "...If I want to live a normal, happy life...it's not enough to just find my heart. I have to let go of my guilt...let go of the past and my mistakes, and fill my heart with happy things."
"It's what you've always tried to do. What you've always said you would do."
"I've tried...but I can't do it on my own. The pain keeps coming back..."
Yolei lifted a hand up and softly caressed Ken's cheek, like her real counterpart did in the cabin, back in reality. "I could wait forever for you Ken...but we don't have that much time. We're children right now...but life passes us quickly. You have to forgive yourself Ken...or you'll be alone and sad forever. You have to try harder to let go of the past...harder than you've been trying. Otherwise, you'll never be truly alive."
Ken held her hand to his cheek. "But...Yolei...I can't. I...I can't do this on my own. Please...help me," he pleaded, looking deeply into her eyes with his own tear-filled gaze. "Please..."
The dream Yolei started to cry herself, and the skies above them began to turn gray and dark as rainclouds descended on the perfect scene. "Ken...I can't help you. You're the only one who can let go of your past. But when you do...I'll be waiting for you. I'm waiting for you in the cabin right now...wishing that you'll be alright." Yolei moved her hand from Ken's cheek to his chest, over where his heart was. "I'll be here..."
Yolei started to fade away, which made Ken grow alarmed. "No! Yolei, don't leave me!"
Good bye Ken...I'll be waiting for you...my love...
"Yolei!!" he cried one last time, before she faded away completely, leaving him alone on the windswept hills as the clouds let the rain fall. The rain did little to him, thanks to the costume he now wore, but even without it he would have been oblivious to it. His pain was all that concerned him.
"...Why does everyone I love leave me when I need them the most," whispered Ken.
"I've never left you, little brother."
Ken whipped around, and saw another boy walking towards him. He had purple hair and black-rimmed glasses, and wore a hooded sweater with jeans. Despite the heavy rain that poured down on them, the young man seemed unaffected by it. Even his glasses were completely rain-free. As Ken watched the other young man approach, he felt the tears inside him flow once more.
"...Sam? Is it really you?" Ken asked softly as the young man came within arms length of him.
"As real as I can be," he answered. "It's been a long time Ken...I've missed you. I see you have a new fashion," Sam said as he fingered the material of Ken's costume.
Ken wiped the tears and rainwater off his shades. "I've missed you too Sam..."
Sam smiled and put a hand on Ken's shoulder. "Listen...I'm sorry for everything that happened."
"What do you mean? You didn't do anything..."
"Yeah I did," he replied. "I made you think that I didn't love you. I made you feel guilty for what happened to me...when you shouldn't."
"*sniff*...I didn't mean to say that I wanted you to disappear forever. I really didn't..."
Sam drew him closer so that they were hugging, with Ken crying into the boy's shoulder. "I know, I know...it's okay Ken. You didn't do anything wrong..."
"*sniff*...But I-"
"Ken...brothers fight. When they fight...they sometimes say things they didn't mean. Like when I said that I would never trust you ever again...I later wished that I hadn't said that."
"...Really? *sniff* You didn't mean it?"
Sam backed off a bit so that they could look face to face. "Of course not little brother. I was just angry...but I shouldn't have been so mean to you about what happened. I never worked up the courage to apologize to you...but if I had known that there would be a day when I couldn't see you again...then I would have apologized sooner. I never wanted things to turn out the way they did. I caused you so much pain...and now I wish that I had thought things through first. I guess even geniuses like you and me can be stupid sometimes, eh?"
"Sam..."
The older Ichijouji smiled and looked around at the environment, which had started to clear up as the storm passed. Some of the rays of the sun started peeking through the clouds, illuminating the hills and making the wet grass sparkle with little rainbows of color. "I remember this place...it was six years ago, right?"
Ken nodded. "Yes."
Sam went over to the brook and picked up a handful of water, which drizzled through his fingers before he simply let it fall back into the stream. "This is the stream that you and I used to have that boat race, right?"
Ken smiled. "I remember that. We made paper boats and had a race, and both our boats ended up sinking right here." Ken stood at a point on the brook, then seemed to change his mind and stepped a couple paces upstream. "No, it was here."
Sam laughed. "Yeah, I remember that too. We sure had a blast here." Sam sat on the ground where Yolei was before, while Ken stood by the stream, remembering some of his happier childhood memories.
Ken looked over at his older brother. "Sam...do you know all about..." Ken motioned down at his costume. "...this?"
Sam nodded. "Yeah. I know about the Digimon Emperor...and I know that I had a hand in you becoming that."
Ken sighed. "No...it wasn't your fault."
"It wasn't your fault either," the boy answered. "Someone else tookk advantage of you. You were young and innocent...and hurt, thanks to me. It couldn't be helped."
"Sam...do you think this would have happened if...you were alive?"
Sam slowly shook his head. "Maybe not...but then again, if I was alive, you'd never have become the person you are today. If I had to make a choice between who you are now, and who you would have been if I was still around...then I'd choose you now."
Ken's eyes widened. "Sam...how can you say that? I'm not a genius like you anymore..."
Sam stood up. "Ken, it's not about that. You could be dumb as a rock, and I wouldn't change anything. You have something that I didn't have. You have a gentle heart...a kind heart, that I never had. I was just concerned about myself, and how proud Mom and Dad were of me. I didn't worry about being nice...and that was what started the whole thing, didn't it? "
Ken looked down at the brook again, and slowly pulled out his black digivice. He remembered how this used to be Sam's digivice...before he died and it was passed on to Ken. Now that Sam was here before him, he felt a little guilty as he remembered the fight that started it all. Sam walked over and looked at the device as well.
"When that thing arrived...I never would have guessed how to use it, or why. You did though...which just goes to show you that you truly were destined for this life."
Ken clenched the digivice tightly. "It's because of this thing that you were mad at me...and because of this thing that I became the Digimon Emperor. Now, here I am, trying to prove to Gennai that I'm worthy of using it."
"You are, Ken," said Sam. "You have more heart than I ever could have. That's why you can't let it go to waste by feeling guilty for the rest of your life. My death is not your fault...it was just fate. Everything that happened is in the past now...so let's just forgive and forget."
Ken looked at his brother through his tinted shades. "...You would forgive me Sam?"
Sam smiled. "Only if you can forgive me, little brother."
Ken nodded. "Of course I forgive you. I've never blamed you for anything..."
"I know, you keep blaming yourself," he said with a smile. "So will you stop blaming yourself now?"
"...I'll try."
Sam patted Ken on the back. "...Thanks Ken."
"You too."
Sam looked down at his watch, and sighed sadly. "I've gotta head back pretty soon. They didn't give me much time."
"Sam, don't!" Ken pleaded.
"I have to Ken. I can't be here forever...but I think I have time for one more thing."
"...What's that?"
Sam went over to a nearby patch of grass and reached behind it. Seemingly from nowhere, he pulled out two straws and two cups of liquid that Ken recognized immediately. Sam walked back to where Ken stood, and smiled. "...You think you can still do this?"
Ken tentatively took a straw and cup and held them nervously. "...It's been a while."
"Same here," replied Sam as he dipped his straw into his cup. Sam brought his straw to his lips and blew through the straw to make some bubbles. As usually happened with his, there came a multitude of smaller bubbles which popped pretty quickly. Sam chuckled as he dipped the straw into his cup again. "Some things never change I guess."
Ken dipped his straw into his cup and put the tip of it between his lips. With a steady, gentle breath of air from his lungs, a large bubble formed at the other end of the straw before finally flying free. The giant bubble floated carelessly into the sky, before finally popping about twenty feet in the air.
"I guess there are some things you just don't forget," said Sam as he watched the bubble. No answer came, so he looked over at his little brother, who was intent on the straw and cup in his hands. "...Ken?"
Sam could see a smile on Ken's lips. "...I feel so much better when I do this."
Sam took his straw out of his cup and prepared to blow through it again. "Blowing bubbles always made you happy." He blew a string of bubbles through the straw, trying to blow as gently as Ken did, but ended up just spraying liquid out the other end of the straw like a water fountain. He put it back into the cup once more. "For me...it was one of the few times when I didn't feel like Sam Ichijouji, boy genius."
Ken finished blowing another bubble that sailed high into the sky, before popping high above them. "Really?"
"Really. I felt like Sam Ichijouji, brother and pal of Ken Ichijouji. It's the only part of me that wasn't supposed to impress our parents or anybody else...the only part of me that was truly happy."
Ken smiled at his brother. "...Thanks Sam."
"No, thank you Ken." Sam brought his straw to his lips, and blowed a slow puff of air through the straw. A fair-sized bubble floated from it, going about five feet away before finally popping. Ken and Sam both looked at it with amazement.
"Hey, you did it!" said Ken.
"It still isn't as good as yours, but I think you've got competition now!" said Sam. Both boys laughed, and they resumed their bubble-blowing for nearly half an hour as they talked about anything that came to mind. By the time the cups were empty of fluid, Sam's time was just about up.
"Well...looks like I'd better be going," Sam said.
Ken frowned sadly. "I wish you didn't have to leave Sam. I haven't felt this well in ages."
"I won't ever leave you, little brother. I'll always be watching over you, until you and I can be together again. Besides...I've gotta make sure you're practicing."
"...Practicing?"
Sam smiled. "Next time we meet, I may be able to blow a bubble just as good as yours." Ken returned the smile in kind. The two Ichijouji brothers hugged each other one last time, before Sam started to walk down the brook. After only a few steps, Sam looked over his shoulder.
"By the way Ken...that girl with the purple hair and glasses..."
"You mean Yolei?"
"Yeah...I think you and her have something. Don't let it go to waste."
Ken smiled. "I won't."
Sam chuckled a bit. "Good luck." Sam waved one last time before walking down the brook, and finally fading away.
"...Goodbye Sam," he whispered as the other boy disappeared. Ken heard a strange noise coming from his body, and looked down to see the purple costume of the Digimon Emperor burst into tiny pixels of color that disappeared into the air. Ken gazed down in shock at himself, but before he could register what was happening, the boy was surrounded in a bright white light that flashed around him and blinded him momentarily. Before his sight was even fully returned, Ken could hear the sounds of the other digidestined coming to greet him.
"Ken, you're back!" cheered TK. "We were so worried! You've been gone for an hour!"
"What happened to your costume?" asked Cody.
That particular costume is gone forever...right Ken?
"Right," the boy answered. "I won't let my guilt of being the Digimon Emperor rule over my life anymore. It's time that I live my life."
"What do you mean?" asked Yolei as she walked into the group.
"...You'll find out later," said Ken with a sweet smile. Yolei's eyes widened a bit, and her cheeks turned red as she tried to hide her surprise. While Yolei mentioned how hot it was in Gennai's home, Ken looked over at the TV screen, where Kari was picking up an object from the floor.
"This appeared with you," said Kari as she brought it over to Ken. It was a white digiegg with pink hearts all around it.
"Wormmon's egg!" said Ken happily. "I must have passed Gennai's test."
Yes, young Ichijouji. You passed with flying colors as far as I'm concerned. Congratulations.
Ken bowed politely to the TV. "Thank you sir."
Hey, I may look like I'm a hundred, but you don't have to call me sir. Gennai is just fine.
Ken nodded. "Thank you, Gennai."
Don't mention it. Now, get some rest and enjoy some lunch. I'll inform you children of the next test subject when the time comes.
"I'll get us some sandwiches!" said Yolei as she dashed into the kitchen, followed by Hawkmon. Ken watched her leave, smiling while she playfully dashed around Gennai's kitchen. A pair of fingers snapped a couple of times in front of Ken's eyes, causing the young man to come back into reality. He glanced over at the snapper, TK, who was smiling in amusement at Ken.
"What?" TK only laughed a little and sat down where Cody was playing Solitaire.
****
"Of course he did. Ken's been through this stuff before."
"I guess."
"...What do you mean?"
Davis shrugged. "I didn't really do anything. I just wanted to help him out. You know...make friends."
"...Why do you say it like that? You sound disappointed."
"...Are you going to tell me? You're testing me right? I should have a right to know."
"Except me?"
"You don't think I can handle some stupid test?!"
"I'll show you! I can take anything you can dish out, jerk!"
Davis looked angrily at the apparent source of the voice and growled angrily. "What are you talking about?!"
The voice laughed at Davis' anger.
"..."