Disclaimer: Okay, this is the second songfic I've written using "Duvet" by BOA. It's just that a) I love the song and b) I screwed up the lyrics the first time I wrote it as a songfic. By the way, Speaker for the Dead is not mine, it's Orson Scott Card's. Yeah, I used the whole version of "Duvet", not the TV size version.
Authors Notes: 1st verse is Novinha's POV to Libo and the 2nd verse is Ender's POV to Novinha
//lyrics//
POV
Novinha
//And you don't seem to understand//
Libo, you don't understand why I never married you, it was to keep you safe, and yet you died anyway.
//A shame you seemed an honest man//
On the surface you seemed loyal to your wife, no one would ever suspect that you fathered all six of my children.
//And all the fears you hold so dear//
You always feared the piggies somewhat after they murdered Pipo…
//Will turn to whisper in your ear//
…And they murdered you as well… it's all my fault…
//And you know what they say might hurt you//
I didn't show you what I'd discovered, what Pipo deciphered, because I thought it would kill you… it's my fault
//And you know that it means so much//
It meant so much to me that you would never know, would never find out, would never die by the piggies' hands…
//And you don't even feel a thing//
You ignored me, or seemed to ignore me in public, my children, your children, think you hated me… is it true?
//I am falling//
I can't think correctly, without Marcão here, all I think about is you…
//I am fading//
I'm so out of touch, nobody can reach me anymore…
//I have lost it all//
There's nothing left for me…
Ender
//And you don't seem the lying kind//
You seemed like a lost girl, deprived of her innocence at a young age when I received that first transmission on Trondheim. I didn't think you would ever lie to me
//A shame that I can read your mind//
My implant, Jane, thinks, and she reads your computer, and she understands you; she relates you to me, and helps me better understand you
//And all the things that I read there//
With Jane's help I understand why you hid your discoveries from Libo, and why you continue to hide them from Miro and Ouanda. You can't continue to keep your knowledge a secret, for they may die from your ignorance…
//Candlelit smile that we both share//
You're like me; both of us ripped away from our loved ones at such a young age, doomed forever to follow the path for the "greater good of humanity" but always alone. We both hide from ourselves, condemning ourselves to bathe in the grief of those who we've "destroyed"
//And you know I don't mean to hurt you//
I don't want to hurt you or your family, I just want to understand you, and those who I've been called to Speak for.
//But you know that it means so much//
You know that the fate of the Lusitanian colony and the piggies depends on your information, and still you keep it a secret, so you don't have to add another life to your guilty conscience. It's not your fault.
//And you don't even feel a thing//
You think it's something that you have caused, and you don't seem to feel that another death could be your fault, not because you shared the information, but because you didn't share the knowledge.
Novinha
//I am falling//
I can't control my life anymore.
//I am fading//
I cannot do anymore.
//I am drowning//
I am not able to fell myself now.
//Help me to breathe//
Speaker, Andrew, please help my family.
//I am hurting, I have lost it all//
I lost my parents, Pipo, Libo… please don't let me lose Miro or the rest of my children to the piggies
//I am losing//
I can't win, but I don't know how to do what's right
//Help me to breathe//
Speaker, Andrew Wiggin, Ender, please help me.