One Night At The Tavern

Tasuki walked into the tavern and stepped up to the bar. "I don't think we should be in here no da." Exclaimed Chichiri in a worried voice as he glanced around nervously. The bar was filled with filthy, unwashed, off duty Kotan soldiers. Several noticed Chichiri glancing at them and gave him grins, which only showed that they were in dire need of a dentist. "Aww come on Chichiri, I'm thirsty here!" complained Tasuki. "What'll you have?" grumbled the barkeeper, a man with a red eye patch and a scar on his other cheek. "Gimme a sake barkeep and the same for my friend here." Grinned Tasuki slapping Chichiri on the shoulder good-naturedly. "Tasuki I don't want to…"

Tasuki grabbed their drinks and shoved Chichiri's drink in his face. He then proceeded to drag Chichiri over to a table. Chichiri sat down and glanced at the door to see if he could escape. "Can't use magic here to escape no da." Thought Chichiri to himself.

The doorway was blocked by a pair of legs the size of young tree trunks. Chichiri looked up, up, up and shuddered when he saw how big and nasty looking the man the huge legs belonged to was. He looked back at Chichiri and began fingering his sword while he smirked evilly at Chichiri. Chichiri turned around and drank his sake in three gulps. He noticed that Tasuki was already on his second drink.

2 Drinks later…

Tasuki had his arms wrapped around two men as they proceeded to sing dirty bar songs about priestesses. Chichiri flushed red in embarrassment. Miaka and Tamahome would be mad if they heard that song. The atmosphere in the bar seemed more pleasant to Chichiri. Even the large scary man near the door seemed kinda friendlier.

4 drinks later…

Ren the huge man by the door with the eye patch turned out to be Chichiri's long lost friend. Ren was telling Chichiri how many swipes of a sword it took to chop someone in half. Tasuki was telling dirty jokes about Titskune to a avid group of drunk men.

6 drinks later…

"Okay watch this guys!" smirked Tasuki as he finished lining up the glasses of alcohol on the bar counter. Chichiri tried straightening his conical hat to see better but only managed to make it more crooked. Tasuki pulled out his metal fan. "Stand back!" he cautioned. Everyone wobbled or fell out of the way. "Recca Shein!" screamed out Tasuki waving his fan.

The glasses were topped with flames. "Flaming drinks!" exclaimed one man grabbing a drink. "Yummy!" laughed another. "I'll buy that fan for 250 Yen!" yelled out another. "1000!" screamed another. Tasuki's eyes began to have a glint of greediness in them. "Just as greedy looking as Tamahome no da." Mentioned Chichiri to Ren.

8 drinks later…

"Yer meh beest friend Koji." Muttered Tasuki to a beer barrel. "The tuffest bandits of Mt. Lige-san huh?" "….." when the barrel. "Are you okaay buuddy?" asked Tasuki as he patted "Koji" on the shoulder (the top of the barrel).

Meanwhile Chichiri was being accosted by horny drunk men. "Come on pretty girl dance for us!!" demanded one. "I'm not a girl!" protested Chichiri, "I'm a guy no da." "DANCE!" roared out another pointing a dagger at his neck. "Hey Tasuki a little help here no da?" asked Chichiri. "Tasuki?" Chichiri glanced over and saw Tasuki talking to a barrel. He sweatdropped. "Come on DANCE girl!" roared the drunk man again, pressing the dagger tighter against his neck. "Okay no da." Agreed Chichiri.

Two drunk men hefted him up onto the counter. Using his priest magic he transformed into a volumptuous, blue wavy haired girl. "Hehehe…no da" laughed Chichiri nervously. Music that sounded strangely like Amiboshi's flute began to play in the tavern. "Dance. Dance. Dance!" the crowd of drunks began to chant.

A microphone was shoved into Chichiri's hands. "I have to sing too no da?" complained Chichiri. Someone gave him a dirty look and he stopped pouting. "Of course I can sing no da!" Chichiri smiled nervously and began to sing and dance. "Someone help me no da…" thought Chichiri.

Tasuki 45 minutes of being sober…

"I wonder where Chichiri went?" wondered Tasuki to himself. A girl was on the counter singing "Can't fight the moonlight" (Coyote Ugly Song) while she danced. One hand held a microphone while the other held a staff to beat off the drunk men who got over exited and tried to climb onto the counter. The girl was a really good singer and she kind of looked familiar. Tasuki starred at the staff the girl held as she knocked a man unconscious with it while still singing and dancing.

The staff kinda looked like Chichiri's…Tasuki's eyes widened in shock and he immediately became more sober. "Oh sweet Suzaku that's Chichiri up there!" yelled out Tasuki in surprise and shock. "He's never drinking with me again if he acts like THAT when he's drunk." Muttered Tasuki to himself as he pulled out his fan. "Recca Shein!" Tasuki yelled out frying the men in front of the counter. He ran and jumped up on the counter. "Come on Chichiri we're leaving now!" demanded Tasuki starting to drag off Chichiri. "But I haven't finished singing the song no da!" complained Chichiri.
He had actually begun to enjoy the singing and dancing. "I'll sic Titskune on ya." Threatened Tasuki. "You wouldn't do that no da." Insisted Chichiri. "Try me." Grinned Tasuki evilly. Chichiri shuddered and stepped off the counter. They started heading towards the door to leave. "Hey that guy's running off with Lola!" said a man pointing a finger at Tasuki accusingly. "Lola?" asked Tasuki glancing at Chichiri. "Just my stage name no da." Shrugged Chichiri. "Let's get that guy and get Lola back!" shouted a man. "Yeh!" agreed the crowd of drunk men. "Oh geez, why did ya insist that we drink anyways Chichiri?" commented Tasuki. "I never did that no da!" protested Chichiri. "Can't even drink a lot without getting flaming drunk…" muttered Tasuki darkly. The angry crowd was moving in on them. Chichiri grabbed Tasuki and ran out the door. He'd rather see Titskune's face than drink with Tasuki again.