CHAPTER 2- THE FIRST WEEK

All the contestants are taken to the famous Big Brother house. Three of them will be gone for at least 8 weeks, maybe more.

When the housemates first enter the house, they find that each room only has 5 beds, so three men will have to sleep in the woman's room. "Oh, I'll sleep with Stephanie! I mean, I'll sleep in the girl's room!" shouts Kurt Angle, "Because.... erm.... no one else wants to, and somebody has to do it."

William Regal also volunteers. "The male population of the house are far too smelly," he points out, "I would rather sleep with the cleaner ladies."

No one else wants to go into the room. After some intense discussion, the six remaining males decide that Jericho is the only other annoying housemate in their room and throw him into the girl's room. Jericho unpacks his bags, upset that he has to sleep in the same room as Stephanie, the "bottom-feeding trash bag hoe."

With the sleeping arrangements made, the housemates go to do there own things. Rhyno goes to take a dump, which most of America has the displeasure of watching. Kurt Angle, Chris Jericho and Trish Stratus head straight for the hot tub, Trish goes for relaxation and the men go to see Trish in a wet bikini. Regal reads "Captain Correlli's Mandolin", which he brought with him. Raven hangs around in the garden with The Undertaker, who is chewing tobacco. The Rock is making his first visit to the diary room and Justin Credible is getting a blowjob from Stephanie. "I've done you a favour," whispers Stephanie, "And you have to do one for me."

In the diary room, The Rock asks Big Brother when they will get their first meal. Big Brother tells The Rock that the first meal will be at 6pm. However, from tomorrow, they will to use their budget for food, completing tasks to get more money.

After the meal, which was a Chinese Takeaway, Big Brother tells the wrestlers that for this week's task, they must complete an assault course, which will be set up tomorrow. "Since today is Friday," Big Brother informs the housemates, "The assault course will be set up on Monday, and on Thursday, everyone must complete the assault course in less than 10 minutes."

The housemates talk for a while. Regal and Angle go to bed around 10pm, and everyone else goes to bed around midnight. The next day, Stephanie is called to the diary room. Big Brother asks her why she was with Justin Credible. "That's none of your business!" snaps Stephanie, "It's not a crime or anything." Stephanie storms out of the diary room, giving Trish a dirty look.

Raven entertains the group by playing his guitar. Well, "entertains" is not the word for it. After three housemates have ran from the room screaming in terror, Raven hands his guitar over to Jericho, who manages to bring everyone together for a song: "Well it's an obvious fact, everyone knows,
That Stephanie McMahon is a trash bag hoe!"
After a few more verses, Stephanie kicks Jericho in the nuts and goes off to her room.

On Sunday, nothing exciting really happens, unless you count The Undertaker in bed with Stephanie as exciting. "Now you know what to do," Stephanie says as she leaves the room.

Rhyno is the first to get up on Monday. He walks out into the garden to find the assault course set up. Stephanie gets up next. After having a quick "session" with Rhyno, they go and wake the others. The housemates spend most of the day practising. It takes the group nearly 20 minutes to do the course. Angle reminds everyone that they have to do the course in half the time.

After dinner, Justin Credible is called to the diary room. He refuses to tell Big Brother what Stephanie wants him to do for her. The Undertaker and Rhyno are also called in, but they also keep quiet.

On Tuesday, spends 4 hours in the bedroom with Kurt Angle. "I told you that small doesn't necessarily mean worse," Angle boasts, "Was it good for you?"

After a lot of practice, the group manage to do the assault course in 11 minutes by Wednesday. Everyone can do the course in just under a minute apart from Stephanie, who takes about 2 minutes. Regal manages to get her to seed up after training with her, and gets some sweet lovin' from her in return.

On Thursday, Big Bother informs them that they have to start the task. The timer starts. Kurt Angle goes first, tackling the assault course in 30 seconds. Trish is next, taking just over a minute to complete the course. The Rock is next, completing the task in 55 seconds. Justin Credible completes the course in 45 seconds, as does Chris Jericho. William Regal takes just under a minute, and The Undertaker takes just over a minute. Rhyno takes exactly 1 minute to complete the course. Halfway through the course, Raven lands awkwardly, hurting his ankle. He takes over a minute and a half to complete the assault course. Stephanie is last, and she must complete the assault course faster than she has ever done before. Amazingly, she does it with only a second to spare.

The housemates had bet 50% of their budget on the task, and won. This meant that they now had 50% more money to buy food with.

On Friday, Big Brother tells them that on Tuesday, each contestant will have to nominate 2 housemates to go up for eviction. In exactly one week, there would only be 9 housemates. Who will be the first to go? Find out in Chapter 3.