Neon Genesis Evangelion (and any one of numerous cultural references contained in the following) are not my property. I am only using them to make a shallow mockery of Hideaki Anno's masterwork. So sit down, relax, take a load off.
As for what inspired this...don't ask. Really. You won't get an answer.
OOC - Derek Zischke
Gendo: Right, I'll explain what I mean.
Ritsuko: Anyone want some decaf?
Rei: [After destroying an Angel] Ooohh YEAH! Suck it down!
Shinji: Sorry Kaworu, I'm not that way inclined.
Kaworu: C'mon, how do you know you don't like it if you never tried it...?
Shinji: [sweatdrops]
Asuka: Good job, Rei/Shinji.
Misato: This place is a mess!
Rei: I think my apartment needs some colour.
Fuyutsuki: Gendo...don't you think all these religious references are a bit...much?
Asuka: Hey, Wondergirl...
Rei: Bite me.
Asuka: Shinji...I'm bored...you wanna kiss me?
Shinji: Hell yes!
Ritsuko: This place is a mess!
Shinji: [listening to SDAT] It's raining men! Hallelujah, it's raining men!
Kaworu: Hey!
Shinji: [sweatdrops]
Rei: Yo mamma.
Misato: Let's have a deep and meaningful relationship.
Gendo: Hehe, heh.
Fuyutsuki: Huhuhuh. [a la Beavis and Butt-Head]
Shinji: Damn, this music is depressing. I think I'll listen to something else. [changes tape] Give it to me baby, uh-huh, uh-huh! Give it to me baby, uh-huh, uh-huh!
Kaji: Oh hi...you're a little late aren't you...Pen Pen?
Pen Pen: It would seem so. Hold still while I try to pull the trigger.
Shinji/Asuka: [finishing the dance in the Evas] Hey, Macarena!
*During the blackout, in NERV. Everyone is in a circle around a few candles and burning paper*
Shigeru: [pulls out guitar and begins to play]
All: Koom-by-ah, my Lord, koom-by-ah...koom-by-ah, my Lord, koom-by-ah...oh Lord, koom-by-ah...
Ireul: HOW ARE YOU GENTLEMEN !?
Ritsuko: Bridge_Bunny rides ThaDoctor's rocket! Oh yeah!
Maya: Dammit, you were up all night practising on Q1DM3, weren't you?
Makoto: She can type faster than you with one hand, don't be surprised when she beats you at Quake.
Gendo: I am Cornholio! I need TP for my bunghole!
Fuyutsuki: Do it, Brother Ikari!
Rei: I am the Lizard King! [blank stares from all] ...What?
Fuyutsuki: Sir, an Angel is approaching from the North sector, what are your orders?
Gendo: ...
Fuyutsuki: ...
Gendo: Zzz...
Fuyutsuki: [facefault]
*Still during the blackout*
Shigeru: Hey, anyone know the chords to American Pie?
The Magi: ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US !
Shinji: Gotta catch 'em all!
Asuka: Kame...hame...HA!
Misato: Gimme fuel, gimme fire, gimme that which I desire! Yeah!
Shigeru: In-a-gadda-da-vida, baby...don't ya know that I lo-ove you... [blank stares from all] ...What?
Ireul: YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE MAKE YOUR TIME !
Misato: Wait! This isn't really an Angel! It's a mask!
Ritsuko: Who is it?
Misato: [pulls off mask]
All: [gasp] Lorenz Keel!
Keel: And I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling kids!
Asuka: [up close to the vidcomm] I am...so scared...right now...and I just want to say I'm sorry...it's my fault...it's all my fault...
Shinji: [listening to his SDAT] I'm a Barbie girl, in a Barbie world... [blank stares from all] ...What?
Shinji: [to Asuka] Wassup!
Asuka: Wassup!
Shinji: Rei, Rei, pick up the comm.
Rei: Hai?
Shinji/Asuka: Wassup!
Rei: Wassup!
*Misato picks up the comm at NERV*
Shinji/Asuka/Rei: Wassup!
Misato/Ritsuko/Maya: Wassup!
Fuyutsuki: ...Those darn kids are embarassing us again...
*Gendo's desk phone rings*
Gendo: Wassup!
Melchior: I bet I could give that Steven Hawkings a run for his money.
Gendo: HA HA HA HA .....
Shinji: Why do you build me up?
Toji/Kensuke: Build me up!
Shinji: Buttercup, baby, just to let me down?
Toji/Kensuke: Let me down!
Shinji: And mess me around!
Rei: And then worst of all!
Hikari/Asuka: Worst of all!
Rei: You never call baby, when you say you will!
Hikari/Asuka: Say you will!
Misato: But I love you still!
Kaji: I need you!
Gendo/Fuyutsuki: I need you!
Kaji: More than anyone, darling, you know that I have from the start!
Gendo/Fuyutsuki: Ah-hh-hh...
Ritsuko: So build me up!
Maya/Shigeru/Makoto: Build me up!
Shinji: Buttercup!
Gendo: Don't break my heart!
Zischke In The Jar Productions (c), 2001-05-15
deadmanseven@optushome.com.au
'Do you suffer from long-term memory loss? I can't remember...'
-Chumbawamba
