It has been a year since Quatre moved in with Trowa. Trowa continued to go to AA and was currently in therapy. He knew he wasn't an alcoholic but went to AA just to cover his bases that and he didn't want Quatre to think he was in denial.
Although they were living under the same roof there really weren't together. They hadn't kissed or touched in anyway except for when Quatre hugged him. The whole situation was beginning to frustrate Trowa immensely. Not being able to touch Quatre was pure torture. He didn't want to complain not when Quatre had every right to hate him yet came back when Trowa needed him.
Quatre was smiling to himself as he waited for Trowa on the porch. He was so proud of all the progress Trowa has made and Trowa hasn't had a single drink. Instead of drinking he talks out his problem with Quatre instead of hiding them in a bottle. Trowa still had some trouble expressing himself but was becoming more and more open about his feelings.
As Trowa's car pulled up Quatre sensed uncertainly from Trowa. Trowa sat down next to Quatre. "Quatre?"
"Yes." Quatre answered in a caring voice.
"Sunday is Cathy's birthday and I still haven't been to her grave not once. I guess I'm scared to face here so to speak. I've made such a mess of my life."
Quatre took Trowa's hand and kissed it affectionately. It warmed Trowa's heart. "She would be very proud of you Trowa. You've made remarkable progress and if there is a heaven I'm sure she's watching over you smiling."
"I think I'll go visit her grave on her birthday. Thank you. I guess I'm just nervous." Quatre released Trowa's hand and looked at him and asked.
"Would you like me to come with you? I mean for moral support."
Trowa smiled and said, "Thank you." Trowa leaned in close to Quatre about to kiss him when Quatre backed away. "It's getting late. Night Trowa." Quatre went inside.
Trowa remained outside. "So close yet so far away." Then it began to rain. He certainly isn't making this easy on me is he?
Quatre went to his room the to the bathroom and splashed some cold water on his face. When he returned to his room and smiled. "He's not making this easy." Quatre pulled out a drawer and noticed a picture it was one of him and Duo. With writing under it that said 'Best Friends Forever'. Quatre looked at it for a moment and smiled he missed his best friend. Was it really fair to forgive Trowa and not Duo? He hadn't even spoke to him or let him explain or even apologize.
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The next day Quatre decided to call Heero and ask if had heard from Duo. Apparently he had they had mended fences and now were friends. Nothing more than that though because Heero and Wufei were quite happy together. Quatre had never seen Heero smile so much. They were even talking about Marriage. Heero gave him Duo's address and Quatre decided to pay his friend a visit.
Quatre went up to the door and wanted to knock but was afraid. He paced in front of the door and began to leave. Then stopped and went back to the door. He took a couple deep breaths. "Quatre?" a voice said behind him. It was Duo of course.
"eh .. Hi Duo."
Duo noticed that Quatre was uncertain and unlocked the door and pulled him inside. Quatre sat at the table and Duo returned with some hot chocolate. The both sat in silence staring at their coca . "If you came for an apology Quatre well then. I'm sorry I don't know what happened. We were drinking and I remember kissing Trowa on the forehead as comfort nothing else I swear. I we woke up and we were naked and there was lube in my hand so I assumed we had sex. I'm so sorry please I miss my best friend." Tears were streaming down his face. Quatre said nothing.
Quatre kneeled in front of him and smiled. Then he took his friend in his arms and hugged him tightly. It only made Duo cry more. "I forgive you Duo. I'm sorry to."
Still holding each other Duo asked, "You're sorry? You didn't do anything wrong Q. You're the best friend I've ever had and I messed it up."
"I was still mad at you but then last night I came across a picture of us and remembered how much I missed you. We should have spoke before now I guess I was afraid to face you. I've missed you and I want my friend back. So what do you say?" Duo hugged harder and so Quatre got his answer.
They spent the whole day talking about their lives catching one another up. Duo was doing well for himself and was dating someone who he wouldn't name just yet he didn't want to jinx it.
Quatre told Duo about his current situation with Trowa as well they cried and laughed. It was nice it felt like old times. Duo understood that Quatre needed time before he would trust him fully but he was glad to have his friend back.
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Sunday.
Quatre and Trowa had just returned from the cemetery. Trowa spoke to Catherine told her how much he loved her and even brought flowers to her headstone. Quatre held him hand the whole time.
Trowa sat silently on the couch. Quatre sat next to him and pulled Trowa into his arms and Trowa broke down. He began to cry. Quatre spoke in a soft voice and stroked Trowa's hair. "It's all right Trowa. Just let it out." Quatre placed a soft kiss on Trowa's head. "Thank you for being here Quatre."
"Always." Trowa touched Quatre's face and his heart melted. Trowa lips touched Quatre's and they began to kiss. Quatre could feel his love and warmth but sadly he pulled away and stood up. "We can't do this Trowa."
"But why Quatre. Don't you love me anymore?"
"I could never stop loving you, this just can't happen."
"Give me one reason why not?"
"Fear." Then Quatre ran to his room. Quatre fell to the floor and cried.
Trowa sat back down on the coach and cried himself to sleep.
TBC
